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Boris · (02-29-2020)

I think Vin Lake is feeling sorry for ole Boris, comrades.

It is no secret I have not been competing at high level lately blin. I have lost a few matches in a row. The last one was because I drank disgusting orange water in Pens Veins. It blyat, I felt like I was going to vomit in my ushanka during that match.

Vin Lake like Boris. Not in the "go on a date" way, but he always seems entertained by me. This is good blin, even though I do not try to entertain. I am very serious blin! There is no wrestler in Federation of Xtreme Wrestlers as serious as Boris!

So Lake want to see Boris win again, so what does he do? He books me against Barry Green again! Lake, as well as all the Gopniks out there, know Barry is one wrestler Boris can definitely beat. Cyka, I was able to throw him into barbed wire after being beat up backstage. That is sign of the Super Slav! It prove just how powerful Boris can be!

Is also prove I have high tolerance for pain, and I do not know when creepy clowns will attack me, but that is not the point comrades.

Ever since the Festival of Cunts, many fans ask "what is next for Boris?" I make no secret that I wish to win title belt blin. Champion of Universe would be preferred, but Boris will take ant title, as long as I can show it off to all the Slav children around the world.

That goal has taken hit since then, as wrestlers like Noel Jackson and Puzz have beaten ole Boris in recent weeks. So I must win this match blin. I have no choice.

Not only is this important for shot at title, but also for the Mad March Tournament. I want to win entire tournament blin, but it would look very bad for Boris is be wrestles first match two days after losing to Barry Green. What would ugly Nazi say if that happened?

So beating Barry Green is what I must do, and I must do it on glass boat. If you are confused, comrades, that is ok - so is Boris. According to web site, we will fight on boat in middle of water, and the winner must send their opponent into water. Cyka blyat, I do not know why they keep things so complicated blin. Why not just fight in ring? Is ring broken?

I will have to throw Barry into water, or he will have to throw in Boris. I am not afraid of water blin - my tracksuit is waterproof. Though, it does take long time to dry ushanka. It would be big inconvenience if that were to happen. I would have to wear back up ushanka, and I do not wish to do that blin. I only have so many ushankas.

This match not just about winning, comrades. Is also about sending message. Western spies have gotten used to seeing Boris beat up and bloody. They dance with joy because of my defeats blin! This can not keep happening. I must show the Slav strength, since it seems many forgot. I must stop these Western spies from singing their songs of praise over capitalism and Fried Kentucky Chicken, blin!

So I must hurt Barry. I must make Barry bleed, blin. Luckily, Boris has something just for that.

[Image: dfJaky7.png]

Barry, I would like you to meet Svetlana. She is powerful mistress. I have smash many melon with her. She also useful for cracking walnuts, replacing tile, and smashing large hole through Vadim's living room wall. Most important, she very good at breaking glass, blin.

She also break bones, so it is bad week to be facing Boris. While I have no real problem with Barry, a Gopnik must do what a Gopnik must do. This is like initiation into Gopnik gang - you may not want to hit cousin with car, but these are rules. Is no problem. Barry is know for quick healing. I can break legs, and Barry will be walking in two weeks blin. Is amazing! Perhaps Barry is not Western spy! Perhaps he is...

Nu, do not say it blyat! There is no chance Barry is Slav! Barry live in Boston Mass Chewit. No self respecting Slav would live in Boston! Place is for Irish people.

Svetlana is going to go into your skull, Barry. Then it is going to go through glass boat. And you will fall into water and drown, dying a very painful death. That should take you about three days to recover. I want to hurt you, but I do not want to take you out of Mad March Tournament. It help Boris for you to stay in, since I know I can beat you. Once I beat Ugly Nazi, I would love to fight you again. Make my path to becoming Tzar of Federation of Xtreme Wrestlers that much easier!

You have already experienced the power of the cheeki breeki, Barry, but I look forward to showing you again. One thing you must remember, is that Gopniks float. I hope we can say the same about you, Barry. If not, bring those little plastic things American children have on their arms when their parents leave them in pool while they go and yell at each other, because you are going to be swimming. At least you know blin! Maybe wear swim shorts.

Thank you all for watching, stay cheeki breeki, and I will see you all in Florida! Oppa!

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