I've been waiting back here like a viper, coiled to STRIKE!

Tonight was my night... someone threw Madison Dyson into the wall backstage. It looked like a pissed off Uber Eats driver who didn't get a tip. Regardless, Dyson slammed right into me! The ubiquitous CLANGY POLES that are always backstage for some reason, serving seemingly no purpose.

Well now you know why!

WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING DYSON YOU CUNT NUGGET! YOU LOOK LIKE A BITCH WHO WIPES BACK TO FRONT AND PROBABLY HAS A WICKED CASE OF TOXOPLASMOSIS, BROTHER! I'M CLANGIN' AND BANGIN' AND READY TO SPREAD THAT PRETTY MOUTH OF YOURS WIDE OPEN TO BASH OUT THOSE PEARLY BROWNS! GET READY TO GUMMER THESE CLANGY POLES HOSE BEAST!!!


The poles fall over on top of Dyson, clanging loudly.



1!


2!

It was in fact, not an embittered Uber eats driver that sent Madison careening into yonder poles, but the giant Pikachu looking tab of LSD that she just licked. The poles fall on top of Madison with a dolorous clang, and she is shocked to hear them speaking to her.

Oh fuck, this is not a good trip at all!

She tosses off the poles, inadvertently kicking out in the process. But, looking up, she hallucinates an entire endless hallway full of poles! She takes a deep breath. BE NOT AFRAID!

Steeling herself, she bravely faces down the endless length of drug induced foreign objects. Alright listen you ubiquitous rust covered future hobo town tent posts! This is not some lame ass corporate wrestling hardcore match where blood is verboten and the violence has to be toned down for the sake of obese pearl clutching helicopter moms and their fat Fortnite addicted crotch droppings! This is the XW fucking F! And this! She pulls out the Federweight title. Is a title that actually MEANS something. This symbolizes that I am the best goddamn trash talker in the XWF. How it does that I don't know, but I'm reasonably sure it does and also reasonably sure right now that I can see ghosts in the walls. So I will be god fucking damned if I lose it to some ineffectual backstage window dressing that Vincent Lane sits and spins on on those cold, lonely nights where Roxy is too busy getting in Twitter arguments to peg him good and proper! So fuck you you stupid poles! Fuck you dead on in every orifice you....probably don't have....

One of the poles suddenly develops a cavernous mouth and roars at her. Madison's eyes go wide and she takes a step back. I gotta lay off the fuckin' drugs.... Madison then just walks away from the poles because they are inanimate.