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Centurion · (10-16-2019)

Camden: I'm telling you right now - this is going to end in disaster.

(The celebration of Centurion's Hart Title victory is over, and now it's time to get back to business...

...in theory.

In practice, the crew has moved their party from The Bahamas to Wales, where the next edition of Wednesday Night Warfare is set to take place. We open up inside the hotel bar of the Welsh Continental, the hotel the crew is staying in. Going to the hotel bar instead of a local pub is their definition of a "night in" in their current state.

We see a nervous looking Jocelyn Camden darting her eyes back and forth. In front of her sits the twins - Allison and Centurion - who are at a table, staring each other in the eyes. They both have determined looks on their faces, as if they're ready to pummel each other.

As the camera pans out some more, we see something in front of both of them - tall glasses of a dark beer in a boot-shaped glass, otherwise known as Das Boot. Both Cent and Allison have both of their hands on the glass in front of them as they refuse to break eye contact.)

Allison: We didn't ask for the commentary, Jocey.

(Jocelyn throws her hands up and shrugs her shoulders.)

Centurion: I'm gonna fuck you up.

(Last among the group is Alyssa Ferro, fresh off her return to the ring in The Bahamas. She darts her eyes back and forth from Allison and Centurion before speaking.)

Alyssa: 3...2...1...CHUG!

(Allison and Centurion both quickly grab their drinks and begin to chug them. They are neck and neck for a while, but Allison pulls away in the final stretch. She finishes hers off before Centurion, causing her to slam the glass onto the table, leap from her chair, and flip off Centurion with both hands. A disgusted Centurion finishes his beer before placing the glass on the table in defeat.)

Allison: DON'T! MESS! WITH THE QUEEN!!

(Allison walks over to Alyssa, who hands her a wad of money - her winnings from the bet. She begins to count it as Centurion continues to sulk. He turns to Jocelyn, who has a surprised look on her face.)

Centurion: This is your fault! What have you been teaching her?!

Jocelyn: I'm just as stunned as you are. I've never seen her do that before.

Allison: A professional doesn't perform her craft for free.

(At that time, a waitress walks over and grabs your drinks.)

Centurion: (Defeated) Bring out the next round, this one's on me.

(The waitress nods as the other three sit back down at the table. Allison lets out a large belch while rubbing her stomach, causing Centurion to once again look surprised.)

Centurion: What the hell happened to you?

Allison: What? I've always been like this. You just never wanted to party with me. You were "too cool" to bring your goth, lesbian sister to the bar with you.

Centurion: Fuck you, that's not true, at all! I used to always invite you out. You kept saying you didn't want to hang out with my friends. You called them all "losers".

Allison: And I was right!

Centurion: James? Steve? Walter? There not losers.

Allison: No, but you didn't get to the bar with you. You would go with Mav, and Roxy, and Ric, and get yourself into all kinds of issues. Then I'D have to come get your ass the next morning because my niece would call me, telling me "I'm pretty sure Dad's lost somewhere."

Centurion: Bah, Nellie always worried about me more than she needed to. And you make it sound like I had some kind of hardcore drinking problem.

Allison: No, you didn't have a drinking problem, but when you went out, it was never for "a drink". You would go out, tell your loser friends "I'm going to be good tonight", and six Jagerbombs later, you're throwing up along the side of the Trump Taj Mahal.

Centurion: That wasn't us being losers! We were performing a service to our country!

(The waitress comes back with four drinks - a glass of red wine for Jocelyn, two dark beers for Centurion and Allison, and a ginger ale for Alyssa. The four begin drinking again as Allison strikes up the convention.)

Allison: Thanks for coming with us, Lyss. It's good to have you around again.

Alyssa: Yeah! I had so much fun in The Bahamas that I decided to take a little time off and enjoy myself. I haven't gone for an honest to goodness vacation in years.

Jocelyn: Not gonna lie, I thought you were dead.

Alyssa: Haha! Sorry we all can't become big celebrities like you. No, I quietly walked away, which is how I wanted it.

Centurion: I wish we could all be so lucky.

Alyssa: Yeah, what happened with you? I thought you quietly retired and went off the grid?

(Centurion looks over at Allison and Camden and, after thinking for a few seconds, decides not to rehash the same story again for all those who have already heard it.)

Centurion: I'll tell you later.

Alyssa: Either way, I think it's super cool that you're back.

Centurion: Really?

Alyssa: Of course! This is what you live for, right? What's been in your blood since the very beginning? The rest of us, we walked away because we were using wrestling to get us somewhere else in life. But you? You're a natural. There's a reason retirement never stuck with you - because some people are meant to do certain things.

(Centurion pauses. He never looked at it that way. He thought his return was out of necessity, but now, with a title in hand and his friends back by his side, he has noticed something - he enjoys it. He's having fun, much like he was at the beginning of his career. Alyssa is right - it's in his blood.)

Centurion: You do make a point. I have found myself to be more...comfortable out there. I guess I was never cut out to be a shuffleboard and bowling guy.

Alyssa: We need more passion in this world. We need more people going into an industry because they love it. Because of the way the economy is, so many people get a job because they have to. They're forced to work. We're losing our artists, and our creative forces, and we're replacing them with mindless machines who are seen as replaceable. Seeing you do this, because you LOVE to do it, it's almost like art in a way. It's beautiful. And it's a statement in itself. That's why it's great to see you back out there. Personally, I hope you keep doing it until your 60.

(Centurion cracks a smile, but he also reflects on Alyssa's words. He thinks about people he has met along his journey - people who are in a profession out of necessity. And he thinks about the life he has lived. It hasn't always been perfect, but there has been a lot of fun to be had. And why he would ever give that up again is anyone's guess.

He also thinks about all the times in his life when he has regretted something he has done. Most of these involve his family and his friends. Losing them? Losing his business? Going completely insane and flying off the handle? All regrets Centurion can point to. But returning to the ring? Showing the world what he is still made of.

Doesn't make the list. Not even close.)

------Another One In The Casket------

150 wins.

It's a feat never been achieved before in the XWF. No one has ever won 150 matches in their XWF career. The closest is James Raven, who has a little over a hundred wins. He is considered the GOAT. The GREATEST OF ALL TIME!

And yet, here I am, on the eve of my 150th win in the XWF. I doubt know if anyone else will hit that mark. Raven isn't wrestling full time anymore, and everyone else I can think of isn't even close. Maybe Fuzz? Certainly not this new group of wrestlers. They don't wrestle enough, and they don't stick around long enough to rack up that many wins.

Oh, sorry, do I sound a bit presumptuous? Well, too bad. See, I'm not expecting to win - I've already put it in the record book. I know I shouldn't do that. I know I tell young wrestlers all the time to "stay humble" and always consider the possibility of a loss.

...but come on, it's Mastermind.

Despite Mastermind's constant whining of "I'm not THAT bad", I can declare, without hesitation, that Mastermind is the worst wrestler I have faced since my return to the business. Worse than Jack Nation, worse than Big D, even worse than Legion. No one that I have stood across the ring from has been as devoid of talent as this blubbering Kiwi. He's a black hole of charisma. He has the personality of a bag of socks.

Remember Mastermind, you asked for this.

I will say, though, Mastermind did do something smart by attacking me. "But Cent, whatever do you mean?" you may be asking into the dark void of life. While it's true that Mastermind secured himself an ass kicking by doing that, he also guaranteed a match with me. That was his ultimate goal, after all. Without his little attack on me, there is no way this match would be happening. Simply put, Mastermind has not earned a shot at the Hart Title...or an opportunity to fight me in the ring.

The dude has 60 losses. I have about 60 losses, as well, but here's the major difference there - I've been doing this for 18 years. He's been doing it for 4. He loses more than he wins by a pretty substantial margin.

You want to know the biggest tell that Mastermind sucks, though? He has a list of people he's beat. He even sends them little t-shirts. How precious. You know how long a list would be if I wrote down every wrestler I've beaten? It would be well over 200 names, most of whom I don't even remember. If I had to send them all t-shirts, I could put Old Navy out of business.

Mastermind is a fungus. He serves no real purpose, but he just keeps hanging around. Somehow, he convinces the right people that he's halfway decent and gets booked into pretty big matches, but he never capitalizes on it. What's his claim to fame, he held the TV Title for a decent period of time? That's cute. Could he do it again? Hell, could he even WIN a title again? I doubt it.

I laugh when certain people, namely Antony The Jerk and his ilk, tell me that I need to "stay focused" and "worry about what's in front of me." Mother fuckers, do you know who you're talking to? Don't lecture me like I'm some rookie who bit off more than he can chew. I have proven on more than one occasion that I WAS great, I AM great, and I will continue to BE great. I don't need worthless little shits whose knowledge of pro wrestling comes from magazine to tell ME what I should and should not do.

The simple fact is Mastermind isn't in my league. At all. There is a line of folks behind him, starving for a title shot that have earned it more than he has, but since he WANTS an ass kicking, and I'm too hungover right now to fight anyone with actual talent, I guess I'll take the easy victory. If it seems like I'm overlooking him, though, it's because I am. I've already moved on. I'm already thinking about my next opponent, because even on my worst day, there isn't a chance Mastermind could beat me.

If Mastermind feels disrespected by this, he should. And I'm not sorry. This is what happens when you try to punch above your level, and you don't give respect to your superiors. I was perfect content with leaving Mastermind alone. Hell, if he decided to go to Savage and fight for the TV Title, I wouldn't have had a problem with it. It's not like Thaddeus Duke is some kind of unbeatable champion worthy of praise. But no, Mastermind wanted to fight me, so I have to humble him.

And that's what I do best. I take young pricks who think they're God's gift to wrestling, and I send them packing. Anyone remember Mark Brooks? The dude I thought was a golfer and he got all pissy and claimed he would beat me? Remember when I said this?

[Image: keE9Rlr.png]

Come to find out, I was right. Brooks is nowhere to be seen. I buried two members of the Graves family. I sent MDK and Famine Of The Vile back into retirement. No one's heard from Tony Santos since Relentless. None of them gave me the respect that I've earned, and they all paid for it. Mastermind is next. Then Vita Valenteen, and Noah Jackson, and those morons who follow Antony around like puppies.

A trick or street fight? I'm down. The XWF likes to get seasonal around the holidays. If they want to see me smash a pumpkin over Mastermind's head, or beat him to death with a skeleton, then fine. I'll oblige. I've taken part in weirder matched than that. Hell, I just threw Tony Santos through a glass cage. I just hope the front office informed the Welsh authorities ahead of time, because there's going to be blood on the streets of Swansea.

There will come a time when I'm not Hart Champion. That won't be for a while, and it sure as fuck won't be Mastermind who takes it off of me. I'll prove it next week, when Mastermind meets his...

FINAL FANTASY!!!

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