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Mini Morbid · (09-11-2019)

Mini Morbid is strapped to a conveyor belt... WILLINGLY! As we all know no mere mortal of sullied flesh and bone could hope to restrain a powder keg of such HIGH OCTANE and UNCUT masculinity such as he! Yes uncut! The Mini Morbid foreskin ALWAYS grows back!

His mouth is wide LIKE THE MIGHTY PYTHON as dozens of Frankfurters are supplied into his oral cavity and swallowed WITH EASE! Never has such a display of VIRILE WIENER SWALLOWING been witnessed! Nearby, the MANLET known as Joey Chestnut pens his suicide letter, FOR HE HAS SEEN THE FACE OF GOD!

"(SPEAKING BETWEEN SWALLOWS) BARNABUS!!!! It is long overdue that we should meet in the KILLING FIELDS. Lo, your mighty weight has abandoned you. YOU NO LONGER HARNESS THE POWER OF GRAVITY!!! With that, you have become IMPOTENT and WEAK while I, the magnificent GODKING of Mini Morbidonia continues to grow STRONGER. Behold! THE ENDLESS STRAIGHT PRIDE PARADE OF ALL-BEEF TUMESCENCE IS NO MATCH FOR MY UVULAR MIGHT!!!

Green... IF THAT IS IN FACT YOUR REAL NAME... you must only possess the flexibility of a STILLBORN FETUS to bend your long-tortured knee to my superiority. FEAR the ease with which I consume processed meatfoods inside columns of intestinal skin! FEAR the myriad ways in which my WARRIOR'S SOUL will procure and master the weapon of choice in our great battle! WE SHALL COME TO BLOWS! And then, in honor of your great sacrifice at my hands, Barnabus Zarathustra Greensteinberg, I SHALL MOLD A STATUE OF YOU FROM MY NATHAN'S BALLPARK FECES!!! It is a splendorous compliment to be immortalized by one whose blood PUMPS THROUGH THE HEART OF A GOD! In your GREAT HONOR as BEFITTING a fallen combatant such as yourself, HE WITH THE BLOOD OF A THOUSAND CHRIS KYLES!!! Your fetid bust of my royal STOOL will be contracted to the greatest artists of our time - Cecilia Giménez of Borja, Spain! And the sweatshop team that created Deion Sanderses Hall of Fame bust! YOU WILL BECOME LEGEND, but first, you must fall.

FOR ART!!!!!!"

Mini gulps down the final hot dog and all of the hot dog factory workers break into tears, for there are no more left. They know that their factory will now be sold and their jobs lost. Such is the dismay that follows a visit from the powerful deathmonger known only as Mini Morbid. RIP Hot Dog Factory. RIP Barney Green.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode I WILL FILL MY VEINS WITH THE BLOOD OF TEN MILLION HOT DOGS
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