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There's something about Frankie
Author Message
Zane Norrison Offline
The Post-Mortem Punk



XWF FanBase:
Mixed

(loved by some; hated by some; dips between clean/dirty)


#1
06-26-2019, 06:53 PM



"You better be wearing an air freshener. Or twelve."


"Excuse me?"


Not the greeting I was anticipating when I walked into King's Tavern but I suppose that was my own misjudgment. Owned by Axle King, the often cheeky and "off the cuff" bartender definitely had a way with words. The unexpected should always be expected. I was meeting Frankie here but this was usually where everyone met up. It was sort of the unofficial place to be, if you were a part of The Elite. The bar where the freaks and weirdos were welcome with open arms. While Frankie wasn't a part of the team, she was my girlfriend and had already become well acquainted with everyone.


"You heard me. It's 9 million degrees out there tonight and you're a walking corpse. I don't want the place to reek of death."


"Oh fuck off. It's not like I'm rotting."


"Yeah. I've seen the movies, I know my zombie lore. Zombies tend to rot."


Axle twisted open a bottle of beer and placed it on the counter.


"I've been a zombie for over three years now. I would know if I was decomposing."


Lifting the bottle, I took a sip and turned my sights to the further interior of the tavern. When I spotted Frankie right away, I smiled.


"So far I haven't lost any parts yet. Well... with the exception of the time that I accidentally cut off my toe. I just put a band-aid around it, to keep it in place and eventually, it reattached itself."


Laughter hinted my voice.


"I'm like a snowman."


"Creepy."


I heard him chuckle as Frankie approached, wrapping her arms tightly around me, she greeted me with a kiss.


"Do me a favor. Smell him. He says he doesn't smell like death and I need confirmation. From a living nose. I'd do it myself but the police say I'm not supposed to smell people anymore."


"Zane doesn't stink. He smells good."


"Damn straight."


"So the movies lied to me. Well you win again, Hollywood."


Deep, over-exaggerated sigh.


"This is The Neverending Story, all over again. Stupid luck dragon. Why couldn't you be real? That would have been..."


Another sigh, just as magnified and overemphasized.


"Magical."


"You know, I'm pretty sure there's something wrong with you, Axle."


"Says the animated corpse that gets his meals from the morgue."


"Hey! Be nice!"


Frankie ordered, hopping up onto a stool.


"Oh relax, he knows I'm kidding. I haven't been serious since... ever. Pretty sure my birth was my first joke. When I popped out, I gave the doctor a wink and pointed towards him as if to say... you know what's up. The world's revenge was having me grow up in a hellhole. And I have been trying to get the world back ever since."


"Yeah? How's that working out for you?"


"I'm a failed wrestler turned bartender and side-character, it's going great!"


"Side-character?"


"The world's a stage darling, we're all playing our parts. Especially with the XWF camera men running amok. I haven't wrestled since 2014 and I'm fairly certain, I've been included in their creepy, stalker like recordings. That's my fault, I befriended folks that are still employed by the company. I can't help it though, I'm a lover and friend to all. A true humanitarian. I should have been awarded the Nobel Peace Prize, ages ago."


Pause. Axle softly snickered to himself. Then arched an inquisitive brow.


"Hey. I have a weird question."


"Uh-oh..."


"How is this whole zombie romance thing working? Shouldn't Frankie be a zombie or are you two not doing the naked tango?"


That was a question that sparked my own curiosity, in the past but never knew how to ask. Why didn't Frankie turn into a zombie? We were sexually active. Very. And we didn't use condoms but after the first time, since she didn't catch the virus, I figured it wasn't necessary.


"I don't know."


Quickly I sent a glance over to Frankie and cleared my throat.


"Mastermind told me that he was immune to zombies, maybe I just lucked out."


She grabbed my beer and took a swallow. Totally avoiding eye contact. Okay... this was weird. What was going on?


"Yeah. Maybe."


With a swift smile, she raised her focus and met my gaze.


"Obviously, that's what it is... what else could it be?"


What indeed? This subject clearly made her uneasy.


"Speaking of people in wrestling, don't you have a match coming up? You and Raphael are taking on The Boston Bruiser and Kuda, right?"


And if it wasn't obvious enough, she switched topics. Fine. If she didn't want to address the matter, I wasn't going to force her. Not here and now, anyway.


"Yes. Raph and I are facing Boston Bruiser and Kuda on Anarchy. Wanna come and see me wrestle?"


"Absolutely."


There was a pain in my gut, I didn't like the way I was feeling. Like I was being deceived. I hid it well.


"You can be my good luck charm."


"Like you need luck. You totally have this fight, in the bag. Those two idiots have got nothing on you and Raphael."


"Nothing except two thousand pounds of pure blubber. Honestly, I didn't know whales could wrestle, mostly cause I thought they needed to exist in the water or face certain death."


A smirk crossed my face.


"Hah! I'll have to remember to bring a harpoon."

[Image: hZM7vS3.jpg]


1x X-Treme Champ
1x Hart Champion
1x SOTM November 2018
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