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Mini Morbid · (05-30-2019)

Mini Morbid is angry. He has spent thousands of Romanian Lei on cosplayers in Owl costumes, each of which he summarily murdered and sold in pieces on the dark web (to recoup some of the Lei, of course - Mini Morbid would never profit from black market anatomical sales!!!)

Now he has learned the opponent named Hootie is an actual owl. He thinks it is bullshit.

"THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!!"

He paces angrily in his throne room within his volcanic lair.

"Owls carry disease! And how do we know it is even biologically an owl? HAS ANYONE CHECKED ITS LINEAGE??? No. Only MINI cares about the sanctity of pure lines. Only MINI does the work necessary for true eugenic strength! THIS OWL MAY VERY WELL BE A CASSOWARY WHICH ARE VERY DANGEROUS I MIGHT ADD. I will be contacting OSHA immediately after stuffing this angry bird into a picnic basket! I DO NOT EVEN FIT IN A BASKET SO I CANNOT LOSE!!!"

Mini then sticks a ceremonial athame into his palm and allows a drop of blood to fall on a pile of clay. The clay grows into a massive golem! Mini straddles it's shoulders and is carried away.

"Owls are stupiiiiiiiiiiiid."

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode PlaceMarker IT IS AN ACTUAL BIRD????
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