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Chris Chaos and the Salem Bitch Trials
Author Message
Robert "The Omega" Main Offline
Active in XWF


WWW

XWF FanBase:
The IWC

(gets varying reactions in the arenas, but will be worshiped like a god and defended until the end by internet fans; literally has thousands of online dorks logging on to complain anytime they lose a match or don't get pushed right)


#1
03-23-2019, 08:41 AM

430 Venice Bypass N, Venice, FL



Taco Bell Parking Lot


:::::Inside The Cool Bus:::::


Did you really need a Crave Case? Who needs ten freaking tacos, and what’s with the corn nuts?


Drew rolls his eyes ripping open a packet of hot sauce he then squirts half the packet in his mouth before taking a rather large bite from his second hard taco. Robert watches on in amazement and utter confusion.


(Talking with a mouth full)Bob, I’m a growing boy I need to eat. It’s not like you paid for it.


Uh….. Wrong. I did pay for it.


(Still chewing)That’s beside the point Bobby, you can’t take all this money with you when you die. We might as well have a good time and spend it all on the finer things in life like tacos. Oh, the corn nuts…. Tacos and corn nuts are a great way to get all your daily fiber intake. I’ve always got to make sure I’ve got one in the chamber ready to rip and by the way you have six double steak quesadillas, fat boy.


Robert evil eyes Drew appalled


These things are the shit! I could eat 20 of them. If you don’t like these its unChristian. It should be state law.


A bolt of chalky-white lightning broke the utter blackness of night. Robert & Drew both stop eating for a moment staring out the windows of The COOL BUS. They both begin chewing again as another bolt whips across the night sky violently illuminating everything outside the bus for miles around. Jagged bolts endlessly protrude, filling the sky with undying flashes of radiance.


Well, looks like we're about to get one hell of a storm off the gulf.


When there is lighting isn’t there thun………….


Robert & Drew both jump as the thunder cracked all around them, like the heavens themselves might split apart. It rolled over the COOL BUS vibrating the metal roof, becoming a rolling booming rumble. It affirmed all the raw power of mother nature and gave fair warning that all hell was about to break loose.


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Robert & Drew give the COOL Bus doors a once over as Drew stands up with a half-eaten taco in his hand.


Weird… I’ll get it.


Drew strolls towards the front opening the doors as another flash of lighting lights a small silhouette. There stood a witch four and a half foot tall, stooped over with a hunched back. Drew scratches his head for a moment unsure even for his standards, he takes another bite of his taco looking on at the monstrosity before him. Her eyes were pitch black reminding Drew of spilt ink. She had long black string hair matted down to her head like it had never been washed her hair was streaked with the occasional silver. Her skin was dull and grey, warty hands and face, hair growing from each of the warts. Her teeth were rotted out to the core. Her snake-like eyes glared at Drew as her misshapen, raven nose stuck out making her face even more world-weary. She was wearing a woolen black dress covered in cat hair, mud covered her scuffed black pointed boots. Drew points grinning from ear to ear finishing his taco.


Hey Bob did I sleep through spring and summer? Because it looks like Halloween outside.


Drew what in the hell are you talking about?


So, Bob you’re not going to believe this. Not sure I even believe this and I believe everything.. But… Uh… There’s a witch standing outside the doors of the COOL BUS!


Bull shit. Let me see.


Robert moves towards Drew placing one hand on the ceiling of the COOL BUS posting up looking out the door. Robert’s mouth drops in shock as his quesadilla falls from his mouth. The witch points towards Robert. Both Drew & Robert look behind them when she calls out.


Robert Main…


Robert motions for the witch to hold on for a second as he shuts the bus doors in her face


Drew where in the hell is Harley?


Bob, she’s sleeping its night time DUH. Plus she is a heavy sleeper.


I’ve never seen a dog that sleeps heavy or through someone knocking on anything. Harley barks when wheel of fortune is on. Now all a sudden nothing? She’s a dog. Dogs are supposed to take care of shit like this.


Robert reopens the doors on the COOL BUS.


Sorry about that.. How do I know you?


She spat yellow-green saliva to her side before speaking.


Robert we have much to discuss. I’ve sensed you were coming. Plus your name has been spray painted all over this COOL BUS.


Drew shouts with excitement


Bob she gets it.


Robert gives Drew the eye as his smile falls to a grimace.


Lady I hate to break this too you, but the entire world has known about me coming to Florida for months now. My face is plastered all over this state. From billboards to newspapers. I kind of find it hard to believe you sensed I was coming. If you want autographs, fine we’ll sign anything that you have. We are generous people but, that being said Drew and I need to finish eating and hit the road. We need to be in Miami by tomorrow morning so we can hit the beach.


The witch begins walking off motioning for Robert & Drew to follow. Drew quickly exits the COOL BUS while Robert shakes his head in disagreement.


Drew what in the hell are you doing?


Drew shrugs


Bob things happen like this for a reason. Out of the blue, a witch says she has an eerie message. I’m going. Besides what’s the worst that can happen?


Robert sighs mouthing “fine” as he shuts the door on the COOL BUS.


I’ve got some cheap swampland down here I could sell you.


Not in the real-estate market Bob..


The joke goes right over Drew’s head


Bob you end up seeing those turds Chaos put out?


Robert nod as a raindrop hits the tip of his nose


It’s going to bust loose any second. Yeah…. No matter how much you polish a turd… You know the rest.. Everything that he went through was as brainless as saying my genitals do not define my gender.


Well Chaos’s I.Q. does not define his intelligence. Wait yes… Yes, it does.


Well Drew give him a break he’s been preoccupied with SHIT. I’m sure once I cripple Chris at March Madness he’ll pack up his bags and go out wandering for another wrestling promotion because let’s look at the facts, he’s done here. After this he can go back underneath the rock he had been hiding under.


Robert keeps his eyes on the witch



Chris is a skid mark on wrestling. My guess is if anyone saw Chris moving dollar bills from one pile to another they quickly pulled the plug on any interest in him knowing it was garbage that no one wanted to see. He can keep moving his money around while I collect more championships. I can whack Chris Chaos every day of the week and twice on Sunday. I get more accomplished in a single day than he’ll accomplish in his entire career. I’ve never talked about what I deserve, how many critics I’ve got. I keep on earning every single day and I shut every single mouth. Chris Chaos is unoriginal, unimaginative, uninspired, he is just like every other guy before him. He’s nothing more than a stereotype. Each one of them more predictable than the last. These shopworn want to BE’s despised me so much, but in the end, they did everything in their power to be just like me. I’ve laid the blueprint on the table for the world to see. Yet so few have the backbone to use it.


These counterfeit men and women can’t follow the blueprint. Because they don’t have the intestinal fortitude to follow-through. These people much like Chris Chaos are not strong-willed individuals these weak and feeble wrestlers can’t hold my jock let alone accomplish the things that I have in two and a half years. That’s why I have risen to the top. That’s why I stand a double Champion. I do things others simply cannot. What bothers me most about the whole Chris Chaos situation is he honestly believes he is running the game around here. In his own clouded mind, he accepts the things that he says as the unswayable truth. Didn’t he say XWF management was texting him to see if he was going to show.? I call bull shit. Let’s see those text. Because from my vantage point the name Chris Chaos is shit. What happened to the dark and creepy Chris Chaos? Now he’s out here playing a jackass with LIVE PD? One thing he said is correct though, no one want’s him here. No one wants to see outdated, unfashionable, out-of-date. Chris is behind the times and on his last legs. Legs I plan on cutting from underneath him. Plus, you have all the teary-eyed blubbering. No one likes a sniveling little bitch. We all got sick of the bellyaching.



Bobby, that’s all he knows. It worked one time and now he thinks it will work every time. Look how many times Chris has gotten his way. He is like the kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar. He has stepped in front of so much other talent who was so much more deserving. That right there puts a bad taste in people’s mouths. It’s no wonder the entire roster wants him gone. He must stroke his ego Robert, or he just cannot survive. The issue is nowadays there is nothing left to really stroke. Look at the track record as of late. Dick!


Well Drew he believes it’s never going to change. Clearly, he isn’t running the game like he leads on. We are. We have been since the formation in 2017 at War Games. We have become something different, something Chaos could never be. We became locker room leaders. We have become the prophets of wrestling. The ICONS of today. We are the evolution of wrestling. We are the movement XWF has needed. One by one we will cut the pollution like Chaos away, leading a revolution into the future. Just look at all the legends coming back to XWF. Each of them sharpened their spears, picking up their shields once more farthing Chaos’s pipe dream of ever becoming Champion. Those that disagree can fall back. What we say is the truth, we have never sugar coated anything besides a pair of stripper’s tits. We do what we say and never backtrack one step. And whoever would like to step forward and argue said point. We can gladly knock them down several pegs and walk away with our gold like we always do. We are this business. We are the soldiers of the XWF and together Drew you and I will continue picking up our championship swords and slaying each and every beast that rears its ugly head. We have become the lifeblood of this origination and I’ll be damned straight to hell if I allow Chris Chaos and that thunder cunt Jenny Myst to get this hands-on these Championships.


We carry these belts, the Universal Championship & 1/3rd of The Tag Team Championships for a reason. Each time we step through those curtains and make our walk to the ring we carry each man and woman from the past with us. We’re paying homage to those before us. Those who held these championships we defend with every single inch of our hearts. We are paying tribute, honoring those before us. I won’t allow Chris to tarnish the Universal Championship ever again. As long as our hearts pump and there are breaths to take, I’ll continue to fight on. Chris will never desecrate the brass ring again.



Robert & Drew fist bump


The sprinkling rain fell on the three. But soon those sprinkles because miniature droplets of water drenching each of their hair, their skin, and their clothes. The water droplets began flourishing each increasing in size thriving and falling more intermittently. The light drops of rain turned into wet thumps as the icy water raced to meet the ground head first. The sprinkling was now a torrential downpour. The coldness seeped through Robert and Drew clothes as the witch shuffled onward unphased. The bone-chilling cold seemed more than flesh and blood could stand in the shrieking wind and icy rain. The sound of thunder once again rolled in over the ocean nearby as another lightning bolt split the sky.


[Image: giphy.gif]


Perfect. Now we're walking through the pouring rain towards god knows where with a supposed witch.


Speaking of witches Bob. When they get wet…. And not in between their legs.


Robert gags as the rainwater rushes down his face


Don’t they fall apart or some shit? Melt that’s what I was looking for melt. Hey lady why aren’t you melting?


The witch continues forward mumbling


That’s only in movies you idiot.


Hey I was just concerned for your safety.


Hey Drew while you are asking stupid things maybe you can ask her to cast a spell to make your dick bigger.


Robert chuckles as Drew comes to a dead stop


Speaking of my nine pounds of pork. Just ask your sist….


Robert pushes Drew forward


Drew I swear to God shut up!


Suddenly the three come to a stop upon an abandoned tunnel. It looked to be an old drug den and makeshift homeless shelter for decades. It's once exquisite arched brick walls were painted in graffiti. The floor was cluttered with trash and used hypodermic needles, broken bottles and raw sewage. It was inhabited by the most hopeless low-life’s, like Chris Chaos for example.. Each intertwined in their own dog-eat-dog reality. No-one in their right mind would go in this tunnel without the proper hazmat suit and some serious weaponry. The witch moved forward into the tunnel as Robert and Drew remained hesitant.

With each crack of lightning the lights in the tunnel flicker, projecting a menacing brilliance throughout the tunnel, causing quivers to ripple across Robert and Drew’s bodies as they both remained eagle-eyed looking over their shoulders ready for anything that might go bump in the night. Drew drags his hand across the paint covered brick wall, picking up dust and grime. Wind from the outside storm floods through the tunnel, clinging to the scattered pieces of tattered papers, spinning them in the air, only to drop them off onto the floor once more. All signs of existence have vanished into thin air. Robert peers down towards the floor at the mutilated baby doll beneath my feet. Robert stops at a table in the middle of the tunnel where the witch is now sitting.


On this table a deck of cards and one light candle. She motions for Robert to sit. Robert looks to Drew and takes his seat staring at the candle. The flame flickered neatly amid the dusty wax, the tasteful coffee hues were dull beneath the layers of years. At first, it smelt odd, as if the fire were digesting the dirt, then it was just the same as any other candle. Orange flame, blackening wick and pooling wax. Robert gazed up at the tunnels ceiling as small droplets of rainwater hit the table. He listened as the rain battered the top of the tunnel like a hail of bullets, hammering down a wall of water.


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Robert, this is a tarot reading. I will turn over 5 cards. The first card will reveal how you feel about yourself now. The second will tell us you most want at this moment. The third your fears. Fourth what is going for you. Fifth what is going against you. Are you ready Robert?


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Robert nods


The witch turns over Robert’s first card revealing The Tower. Robert stares at the card unsure of what it means. He can only see that it’s on fire with what looks to be two people jumping.


[Image: MToVLxf.png]



Ah, the tower. Robert, you feel that there is a disturbance or disarrangement. You and Drew are both about to go through extensive changes, you both have anxiety or dread, you both fear this change will be catastrophic. You both need to understand and appreciate that such upheaval can force new directions neither of you ever dreamed possible. Robert, you subconsciously have wanted such change. You fear though if you evolve or transform you’ll forever be lost. Just know Robert Main there is always a way back. Embrace this metamorphosis. Soon you will become the caterpillar that emerges from the cocoon with wings ready to fly to new heights.


Robert leans back into his chair crossing his arms thinking all of this is bull shit. Drew looks on in pure amazement hanging on to every word as the witch flips over the next card revealing The Hanged Man Robert places his fingers on the card for a moment tapping it leering towards the witch.


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The Hanged Man… Very interesting Robert. You have a fear of letting go of something that you held near and dear to your Hart, you have been stuck in a place of limbo. Having such indecision Robert can destroy growth eroding away everything that you seek to accomplish. You Robert Main are emotionally blackmailing yourself. You mustn’t be the victim. Sometimes we must have the strength to let go. What is it that you are holding onto? Robert, you must let go or you will forever be held back never able to fully grow.


I’m… I’m not sure..


The witch then flips over The Hermit


[Image: jJyORkX.png]



The Hermit. So, you are using inner strength and wisdom to guide you through this difficult period in your life. This transition in time. A wise man you are Robert. Even if you don't know quite what to do now, you will eventually make the right decision. The Hermit can signal a warning not to make expeditious judgments. Take your time. Think things through. Talk with Drew and Mr. Raven. You three, continue down the same path and will forever be unbeatable.


The witch then flips over the fourth card revealing Death. Drew quickly speaks up


[Image: m207X2X.png]



Oh my god is Robert going to die?


Robert looks at Drew over his shoulder


No. Death isn’t what it seems. It reveals a period of turmoil. During this time Robert you will have to show the world what you are made of. However radical events may become in your life, believe that life goes on and life is what you make of it. Have no fear. You will rise above,


The witch reveals the final card Justice


[Image: ZNXCywp.png]



Justice will be the outcome. The decisions you make Robert Main will go in your favor particularly regarding the crown you wear. Now is the time for some good luck and reward for your good deeds in the past.. Look deep within yourself Robert and everything will come to light. Take this.


[Image: Ew4hybY.png]


The witch slides a green crystal across the table. Robert places his fingertips on the rock as pictures of evil blaze through his mind.


[Image: giphy.gif]


Ah…..


Robert shakes his head standing up quickly from the table leaving the stone in place. Robert glances around the tunnel seeing nothing but smoke. The smoke wasn't completely opaque, but its long grey wisps seemed to curl with others that were much darker some near black. These stretching entities would show themselves in short, dramatic eclipses. Robert looks over his shoulder seeing Drew.


Bob? You look shook what’s wrong?


Touch that stone. Tell me what you see when you touch it. Why is your shirt off?


I got hot. Okay? Let me see that thing.


Drew picks the stone up staring at the tunnel wall his hand on his chest mouth opened.


[Image: giphy.gif]


Bob I see the tunnel wall. Nothing running through my mind. Besides the rest of my now cold taco bell. Well, and how cool this whole witch thing was.


You didn’t see anything at all?


Nothing!


Robert grabs the stone out of Drew's hand as his mind is quickly rushed with images once more


[Image: giphy.gif]


[Image: giphy.gif]


Robert drops to one knee dropping the stone to the ground holding his head.


Drew…. I think she cursed me.





******STATIC******
























_-_-_Promo_-_-_


::::::BOLD::::::


I’ve been brawling against nobodies? Since when? Chris take a glance in the merroir jackass. When you do ask yourself this question for me. Who have you faced at all besides Jim? Who you perished against for the sixth time now. Took me once to demolish Jimmy, just saying. Now the short answer to my question is no one. You haven’t done a damn thing but blow smoke up all our asses and puff out your chest. You attacked a damn near dead Gator after I obliterated him. Real tough guy Chris, I was right there, and you didn’t do a damn thing. Last time I checked Gator wasn’t a nobody. I might have been facing nobodies in your eyes, but that’s just it right there Chris.. That’s the point I’m trying to get across that thick head of yours but the shit for brains you have just can’t seem to process the facts. You seem to have a real issue with specifics. That is unless those said particulars are in your favor. In your eyes, everyone on this fucking ROSTER IS A NOBODY. You could go and locking horns against a girl scout trying to sell thin mints and after she kicked your teeth down your throat making you buy a case of cookies, you’d tell the world she was the next coming of Jesus Christ himself.


::::::AMBITIOUS::::::


You are prompt to point the finger yet three points right back at you. Pot meet kettle! I know it’s very challenging for you to follow the bouncing ball around here so pay attention for a second. Pull your head out of your ass and listen to what’s going on around you. Get all Jenny’s nut butter out those ears and perk up hoss. I know the taste of Jim’s dick is still lingering around in that mouth of yours. Now the world has never evolved around you Chris and never will. Therefore, you sound like a pea-brained dingbat. Who am I trying to fool though? If it doesn’t involve Chris Chaos you look the other way. But back to the half-pint's lightweights, I’ve been facing. When we went into that Tag Team Championship match against VV and took the titles I might add. I didn’t know she was such a downtrodden unknown. In those snake eyes, she might be Chris. She would wreck you in the middle of the ring. Look at everything that she has accomplished. She’s defended that Xtreme Championship so many damn times she has a case now. Once again Chris something you can’t get. Here we are with another line of shit from Chris Chaos, the man who can’t get the bottom line to save his life. You throw shit just hoping it sticks. So, if we are going by your standards that you have clearly set in stone. That would make VV better than Chris Chaos. She isn’t this down-and-outer flunker of a loser you say I have been facing. Chris, it is you who are the underprivileged dead beat everyone has written off. You are a has been underachiever.


::::::CONFIDENT::::::


Then you go on to say that I have been concealing myself behind my brother Drew. Masking myself underneath the APEX banner. Chris, again clean the baby gravy out of those ears and listen. Where was Jim or Drew when I won Leap Of Faith? Where were they when I won the Universal Championship? They went here. I’ve never shrouded myself in the darkness and never hid behind anyone else. People like you Chris do that you’ve cloaked yourself behind more people than another person on this roster. Because you know you cannot do it on your own. Where’s EMPIRE? Where’s Peter Gilmour, Erik Black, Jenny Myst and N.A.I.Z.? Anytime you touch anything it turns to shit. The fractures immediately forum because you cannot be trusted. You talk about how you have screwed you over. Yet, Chris, there is not one person on this roster your web of lies hasn’t ensnared. EMPIRE fell apart because of you. The greed and envy got underneath your skin and you betrayed the very people you recruited to help you in the first place. You repeat the same cycle, then cut your nose off to spite your face. You wouldn’t know a brotherhood if one bit you right in the ass. The things you say are so moronic. There are handicapped people who look at you and say thank god I’m in better shape than that guy!


:::::Big GrinARING::::::


Chris I don’t hang onto to my accomplishments. I don’t rub them in anyone’s face but yours. Because it gets underneath your skin, it pisses you off to no end that’s why I bring them up. You go climb up onto the soapbox and go into a tangent. Explaining how all my achievements are not as valuable as I think they are, and maybe they’re not. That I held the mid-card down. Maybe I did hold the mid-card down Chris. At least I can say I held something down. I turned a division on the brink into the gold standard. No matter how you want to sell it. Chris, I am the longest reigning Champion of something. It’s in the record books forever. My name will transcend generations. People will read my story and learn about a true defending, fighting Champion. Not one who fumbles Championships every other week. What will your name be? The same as it is now. Nothing. Forgotten, a black eye on the industry. At the very least I can say I am the longest reigning something. After I cut your head off and continue on my Universal Championship reign you won’t even be able to say you are in the top five category of longest reigning champions. You undercut everything because you can’t argue the fact. Nothing on Wikipedia will tell you otherwise.


:::::Big GrinEFIANT::::::


They are facts even the silver-tongued liar cannot twist around and use against me. I do it because Chris when it comes to you.. It’s always been about who has more trophies, it’s always a pissing contest or who has the bigger dick, and clearly, that man is me. I despise talking about the past but when you face Chris Chaos you have to go back to the future because there is no other choice in the matter. The entire things becomes an argument of the irrelevant. Every single word that you had carelessly tossed has had no merit behind them. You make every opponent you face expostulate facts from yesteryear because Chris that’s the only dispute you have at this point. The small period of time where you were Universal Champion the one and only exhibit you thrust into every sentence. No matter how much you try to justify the past. It will not help you come March 31st. The things that you did forever ago will not stop THE DEAD MAN’S HAND. It’s you and me Chris and I will own your ass in that ring. Because that is what I do. I take nonbelievers and change their minds.


::::::FEARLESS::::::


You claim there is a roster issue and Chris there for a while, it was a major issue. Now the roster flourishes like gold. Talent pours in the doors each week. Look at LUX for example. He’s a future champion in the making. You and I are not one and the same. Never compare me to you. I am nothing like you nor will I ever be. I’ve never ducked the lonesome Chris Chaos. As a matter of fact, I’ve been dragging your name through the mud since stepping foot in this company. You are the one who has rode the pine. All you ever had to do is ask Chris, and I’d have sat you down a long time ago. But you didn’t.. But why? Well, that’s easy to clear up. Because there wasn’t anything in it for you. The Hart was below you so you must stay face. You know what you know right now where ever you are. I beat you. Having the mid-card stomp a mud hole and walk it dry wouldn’t be a good look for a supposed walking legend would it? Now that it’s for all the marbles, you think well just maybe I can do it. If not, you have that excuse you always go looking for. All you got to say this time is “Robert was Champion, me losing to him was the expected outcome”. But I will not allow you to use that. I’m sending you packing once and for all. It’s all or nothing Chris and you will leave with nothing! You believe I want to keep the Championship from you and that is correct I do. I never want to live through the Chaos era again. No one wants that, and I’ll do everything within my power to make sure that never happens again. That’s why you have this match. After I win Chris there will be nothing left at argue, nowhere left to go. You will reside right where you belong, underneath my boot at the bottom.


::::::VALIANT::::::


We are not the last ones left from the golden age, Chris. The golden age is returning in droves. The braves have been away. Now they have finally found their way back home. Look around. You are nothing compared to these men. James Raven, CYREN, Jack Nation. The names go on and on. The XWF is far from dead. No… It’s been reborn on a revolution APEX brought to light.


::::::VISIONARY::::::


March Madness Chris there will be no redemption in this story. I’ll walk over your broken bones and take my rightful seat on the throne you’ve been seeking your entire career all the while wearing your supposed crown. March Madness I lay Chris Chaos down for good.


::::::TRENDSETTER::::::



Chris Chaos you might shoot….






















Robert Main shoots to kill..



















::::::ICON::::::






Former:
[Image: 6x9xFnQ.png]
[Image: nLYNvyj.png] x2
[Image: fMJwa5h.png] x2
[Image: WPoUWuI.png]


Longest Reigning Tag Team Champions in modern history. W- Drew Archyle & James Raven
Longest Reigning Hart Champion in modern history:280 days
2nd longest reigning Universal Champion :269 days
Tag Team Champions W- "Chronic" Chris Page as Cataclysm
Trio's Champion W- AX3
2020 May Superstar Of The Month
Winning Team Wargames 2020
Winning Team War Games 2019 W- APEX PROPHECY
2019 Feud of the year W- "Chronic" Chris Page
2019 Tag Team of the Year W- Drew Archyle & James Raven as APEX
Roleplay of the Month February 2019 "Junkyard Dog"
Leap Of Faith Winner 2018
July 2018 Superstar Of The Month
December 2018 Superstar Of The Month
December 2017 Superstar Of The Month
Winning Team War Games 2017 W- APEX
Mr. 24/7
[Image: Qfgvjya.png]
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