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Chris Chaos · (06-12-2018)

The cop lights were seemingly right on top of him. The warm air raced through his lungs as he ran, to the best of his ability, away from the horrific scene. It all came from pride, all this. It could have been prevented. Pride turned people into monsters, because it makes them do things they wouldn't normally do. Nobody wants to be shown up, and sometimes being a "man" is taking a step back....not racing head first into total chaos.

Be the bigger man, they say. But how can you be the bigger man when you're pride is constantly under fire.

The road was hard beneath him. He hobbled down the road, wincing with every step, but still moving faster than he ever thought possible after such a terrible crash.

He couldn't go back, he couldn't face it. He couldn't see the cars, the upheaval of normality, the cut in half girl........he did this, but he couldn't wrap his head around why. How could he be this evil? How could he let himself stoop so low? This wasn't him anymore. A light rain was coming down. After a while of hobble running, he dropped to his knees. All he could see were her eyes, and that straight forward blank stare. He dropped to his knees, the hard road colliding with them so hard he felt like they'd shatter, and he buried his head in hands. For the first time in his adult life, he actually cried.

+++++++++++++++++++++++

"Paulie, you don't need to go so fast. This is a one lane road, and it goes for miles. He'll run out of gas eventually. Just keep pace."

Paulie's eyes were focused, a fire inside them. Amber, his girlfriend, was a feisty one....a strawberry blonde beauty with tats and fake tits, the biggest an brightest blue eyes he'd ever seen. She was an angel in Daisy Dukes. On this particular night, her flannel shirt was tied in a not just under her D cups, exposing her midsection. Her nose rise shone in the lights from the radio console.

"Jason said it needs to be done. This little surfer boy looking fuck has screwed things up for us enough. Jason and Nicole are going to be happy damnit, and if we have to take this kid out, we will."

Paulie was short, but still taller than Amber was. Stocky build, like he goes to the gym, but by no means huge. Slicked back black hair and a salesman's smile, this kid had slain more pussy than a kill shelter. Amber loved him, but to him, she was just a conquest. People like Paulie and Jason weren't capable of feeling love. They only felt love when they opened their wallets.

He gripped the wheel. Looking over at Jason in the car next to him he nodded. Jason turned off. Paulie stayed straight. Nicole, in the passenger seat was trying to get out, but Jason had locked the doors.

"We don't have to do this."

"Amber, remember when he punched you last year? You're gonna let him get away with that! I'm not!" He brushed a finger across her face. "I love you."

He was such a good liar.

"We're taking the back way, we're gonna cut this turd off. He thinks he is all that, like he is big shit. I'm gonna show you that he is just a little boy trying to play with the big boys."

Amber sighed, resting her hand on her fist on the window ledge. "Sometimes, I wonder who the little boys really are."

15 Minutes Later.......

"PAULIE! SLOW DOWN!" He was going over 110 MPH. He was racing directly at the car coming towards him, who showed zero signs of swerving or slowing its march.

"Paulie, he isn't stopping! He's not stopping Paulie NO!"

But he was locked in.

"Motherfucker....." he whispered under his breath, gripping the wheel tighter. The two cars were 10 yards apart now and Amber felt her bladder release into her shorts.

"PAULIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE" was the screech she emitted as the two vehicles struck.

The urine puddle on the seat hit the windshield........and it all became a blur.

++++++++++++++++

It was some time later that he returned to the scene. The coroners were here now. The vehicles were long gone, towed away to be evaluated and the cops were taking statements and filing reports. Blood covered, he limped towards the scene his pride has caused.

Why didn't he just swerve?

There was a white bag on a gurney. It was flat on the bottom, as though only half a person were on it.

Amber.

He walked over, pulling the tarp like covering back to expose that face that haunted his every thought.

He took a moment to stare at her, an innocent life lost for no reason other than foolish pride of not wanting to be looked at as weak or scared. A single tear rolled down when he heard the voice.

"It was you."

Cold, piercing.

Nicole.

"You did this. You couldn't leave well enough alone, Chris. You couldn't let Jason and I be happy."

Her voice had no emotion. It was cold and flat.

He spun around and looked her in her big eyes, wet with fresh tears.

"You did this!" she yelled again, and her words hurt him more than any crash ever could.

He leaned in close, motioning for her to come closer. To his surprise, she did. When she got close he whispered.....

"I did......I did do this."

She nodded.

"................you're damn right. And I'd do it again."

Her eyes went wide. He kissed her forehead and pulled away.

"I'd be glad to."

He turned and walked away, leaving the one he love stunned and speechless. She watched him until he disappeared into the horizon.

The sun was coming up.

+++++++++++++++

Lame joke after lame joke. That is all you've been reduced to, Robbie. Don't you see it? You have nothing left. People don't fear you like they used to fear you. The only person who fears you now is the waitstaff every time you enter a restaurant....because we know you require a lot of service and don't strike me as the tipping type. Robbie you have nothing left to say. You have nothing on me, so you reach for body jokes to make yourself feel better. You have nothing left to attack and I find that just dandy. I'm in your head, Robbie, face it. I've got you off your game and you don't know how to handle it.

I've got ya by the balls.

I'm not exactly sure why you say the things you say, but I feel bad for you. Living in the world of Robbie Bourbon must be hell.

Like a bad mushroom trip. I'll give you credit for creativity, but thats it. You're full of gas and air, Robbie, and I think I've proven this. I exposed you for the fraud you truly are and all could respond with was more half-witty one liners.

Peter has certainly taken the brunt of the abuse in these last two shoots hasn't he? Peter has been the scapegoat. When all else fails, fall back on the trusty Gilmour jokes. Maybe someone will think its passable. You are just so pathetic. You're hiding from the real issue here because you don't want to stand up and face it like a man. You don't want to stand up to the fact that Robbie Bourbon just doesn't matter anymore. You walked out on us, and we forgot about you. This isn't all happy happy joy joy, Rob, it is malice in the palace. We don't like you, and it is my time to finally take you out. To knock you down a peg. You went from superhero status to being as pathetic as Danny Sex and 40 Squirrels. Remember those guys? Losers, well....welcome to the club. They had one gimmick, and look how long they lasted. Now, you're becoming much the same. You're a comedy act, not a fighter, and this time the joke's on you. You're Louis C.K, a creepy, balding, overweight whine-bag who creeps out women and never changes his routine. You're security blanket, Robbie, you refuse to let it go. Maybe if you keep plugging away you'll strike gold, right?

Negative ghost rider.

And where has your partner been? Where has your little Motherfucker Butt-Buddy been? He's been quiet since that PTSD fueled mumble fest he launched a week ago. One too many shots to the head, I think you're A plan is losing it.

Face the truth, Robbie, War Pig shouldn't even be a plan C.

But he is your only option isn't he? Your best bet. You've burned all your other bridges. You run back to the one thing you know you'll always have, even though it sucks, because you know you have no other paths to walk. War Pig thinks you're the second coming of Christ....well, because....

.........War Pig sucks.

You are wetting your oversized onsie aren't you? You'll never admit but you're feeling more alone in your world than Jerry Sandusky in solitary and you realize this match might be your only hope left to mean something to someone anymore. What is it with the fat guys around here? They all try to make corny jokes that a downs kid wouldn't laugh at, then all end up getting brooding and deep and woe is me.

Robbie.......you're becoming Barney Green.

How come all the fat guys here eventually turn into Barney Green?

Barney was holding on to any strand of hope he could that a return was possible....but he walked out one too many times. He was just an idiot, but you, Robbie, you're an idiot and arrogant. You're sitting there right now, plotting another promo while watching this one, and coming up with an explanation as to why you're smarter than us all. How Robbie Bourbon is complex on levels we will never understand and we don't get his humor because we don't possess the necessary intellect. Right, Robbie? We're all just idiots in the eyes of Robbie Bourbon.

Pure deflection.

Robbie Bourbon hates himself more than he hates salad. We all suffer because Robbie gets into his moods and becomes more insufferable than Fran Drescher fucking Snookie over the loudspeaker. You want to talk about my past and how I no longer have it? Robbie, have you looked in a mirror lately? Have you found one you can fit your total reflection in? You're a Top 50 Superstar here and you only have that accolade because you have a few resume notches on that Alaskan sized belt buckle over me. I made your career, and tomorrow night I am going to end it. After tomorrow night, The Motherfuckers no longer matter. Robbie Bourbon no longer matters. War Pig never did.

Tomorrow night is a milestone in my career, and if I have to drag a bloody and beaten Peter Gilmour over the finish line, I will. I am unstoppable because I am no longer afraid. Facing you used to make me nervous, Robbie, because I always thought you had the upper hand. Now, the only thing I fear is myself and what I am going to do to you when that cage door closes..........

Pure Chaos."

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