War of the Roses

Chap. 2 – Yellow Rose


“Danger no refuge holds, and war no peace,
For him who hears love sing and never cease
Beside her clean-swept hearth, her quiet shade:
But gather all for whom no love hath made.”

- Yeats
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Henry of Bolingbroke had been named King soon after arriving in England. With King Richard II’s lack of competence, and a rightful heir to the throne. Most nobles had supported the change, fearing Richard II’s lack of trust in them. Henry of Bolingbrook had swiftly become King Henry IV. The House of Lancaster had become the Royal Family of England, and those who supported them were justly paid forward. This brought a new time of peace to the Kingdom of England.

King Henry V had taken over from his father and lead England to new prosperity as they had won the 100 years war. The house of York recovered and many leaders were given nobility. But when Henry V suddenly died, leaving his infant son as King, there were renewed hostilities given the dispute over the crown.

Henry VI’s reign was riddled with poor advisors and people seeking personal gain. The Kingdom quickly distrusted the monarchy and that gave the House of York an even more legitimate claim to the throne. As Henry VI’s wife, Margaret of Anjou, proved herself to be bloodthirsty and vicious, the House of York knew they needed to act.
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May 22, 1455
YORK

Richard, Duke of York, rode his horse up a hill in St. Albans and surveyed the landscape. From a number of kilometers away, he could see the King’s army approaching. There would be war here.

He stood with two of his closest friends and advisors as he took a deep breath digesting what was happening.

It seems unavoidable now

He’d never wanted to fight, but that’s what good men do when they see injustices. There was conflict when his family had lost their right to be named Royal, and bad blood had erupted between the two families since then.

But now this, good men were being killed because the Queen didn’t like them. Taxes had been risen to an all time high. The corruption was too much for this Kingdom to bear. Not only were the King and Queen ostensibly evil, the people they surrounded themselves with were fattening themselves by oppressing the people, and these were good people, these were HIS people.

The Duke of York rode back to his waiting army. They weren’t well-trained. It was certainly not a group made up of ex and current military members. But this was a passionate bunch, they had sensed injustice and wanted to do something about. For some today, that meant losing their lives.

Men, I can’t promise safety, and I can’t promise victory. What I can promise is the chance to tell your families you did something. We don’t fight because we enjoy it, we fight because we know it’s needed. Anyone who isn’t willing to die for their country can leave now, we’ll understand.

Richard waited for some men to leave, but none did. He smiled.

A scream erupted from his lips, his horse took off down the hill. The war was on.
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Neville wandered the streets of St. Albans and looked around. The city itself was modern enough, and he could only imagine what this place must have looked like in ancient times. St. Albans was now a transit city, holding one of the largest train stations it commuted people both South to London and North through other major cities. Everybody in this city seemed like they wanted to be somewhere else.

Because of that, it gave off a real suburban vibe. Mothers were nestled with young children everywhere. Most restaurants looked to be for the lower to middle class groups. There was nothing remarkable about this place.

Neville had been a suburban brat at one point in hit life. If anything, most would have defined him as lower class. But he had worked his way out of things. Suburban life, in many ways, felt like a kind of exile. He knew he was greater than what it looked like, and so Neville had fought fucking hard to better himself and achieve the greatness he needed to.

As he stood in the streets of St. Albans, he felt a need to call out many in XWF for looking down on him. Many still disputed what others had come to know. In terms of this wrestling federation, Neville ran things. In terms of heirs, Neville was the one apparent. It was a matter of when, not if, he took his rightful place at the top. And he would fight like hell to get there.

I’ve thought long and hard as to why I’m not sure I’m getting the credit I’m due. XWF, let me ask you, when was the last time you had someone come in and dominate the way that I have. You forget in terms of being here, I’m relatively new. Yet, we haven’t seen the likes of people like me before and I don’t think we ever will in the days to come. I’m starting to get annoyed that I’m barely being mentioned, I feel like an afterthought many times.

Why when teams were picked, did I even have to wait until the second round to hear my name called? Why would I be considered a middling second rounder that had to wait for Peter? Worse yet, how the fuck does anyone consider Erik Black a first rounder?

If anything, you guys should all be put on notice. Even on bad days, I’m better than half those dumb fucks picked. But you guys had to go poke the wild animal didn’t you?

XWF, men are more dangerous when they have something to fight for, and the last thing you should want to do is get people united behind a cause. I now have a cause, I still feel disrespected and if I’m not given respect I’m going to have to fight and take it for myself. I’ll fight to the very end of my career trying to make sure people see me for who I am, and I feel some do.

Neville looks into a restaurant called Zaza’s on St. Albans’ high street. The Italian food looked average as best. Neville marvelled at the way a few people were dressed. In the corner sat a couple, obviously for a special occasion, and the man was still in jeans and an untucked, wrinkled shirt. These really were common folk.

Jack Cain never recovered from losing the TV title. Erik Black showed all his weaknesses. Even on my team Jenny seemed to stop her ascent in the men’s division when she was beaten by me. Michael Graves, one of the “greatest” also showed his own mortality. XWF is a federation of commoners parading as royalty.

You need a King to take his rightful throne.


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“A woven silence or but came to cast
A song into the air, and singing passed
To smile on the pale down; and gather you
Who have south more than is rain or dew”
- Yeats
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May 22, 1455
LANCASTER

Henry VI heard the yell and rushed his men into battle. He had brought some of his fiercest leaders to come fight this battle, he had never actually thought this might turn into a war.

Charge!

The other troops were uphill which meant they would be able to move with more speed than them. Emotions were high, and the area erupted into a series of screams from both sides.

Henry VI hung back as his troops rushed forward

Thipppp

The sound of a bowstring is an odd one. It’s both incredibly quiet and windy, yet it makes such a distinctly terrifying noise. Henry looked up and saw a team of archers firing in unison. To his horror he saw men dropping around him. One of his generals took an arrow to the eye, the scream of pain was met with more bowstring noises. Two soldiers ahead of him dropped with arrows to their chest

Shit

He felt the arrow before he saw it. A sharp pain in his neck and the warm ooze of blood dripping towards his clavicle. Pain was one thing but seeing it was another. The arrow emerged from the side of his neck like growth on his body. Screaming didn’t seem like an ample enough response.

The ringing in his head was the worst part. It felt like the rest of the world went quiet except that damn ringing.

Make it Stop!

Men looked on as their king fell to his hands and knees

Make it Stop!

He crawled, it was all he could think of doing. Past men fighting for their lives, he didn’t give them a second look. He crawled for what seemed like hours and found a barn near the battle ground. As he lay down, the scream came. It felt like a late reaction, but he couldn’t stop screaming.

Hours later people found their King screaming “Make it Stop!” curled into a ball with an arrow sticking out of his neck. York had won.
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Dec. 18, 2017

Neville found himself looking into a betting store on High Street. Men, with little to no money, seemed amused by putting it on the line for the chance of winning big. Football matches littered the screens, in one room men fawned over horses trying to imagine which one might run the fastest.

But the reality of the situation was that most of these men would go home losers. For some, losing would ruin their lives. For others, this was a problem that they needed serious help with. They kept trying the same thing repeatedly and never won. They would catch a break and win small which led to a continuation that caused them to lose big. They gambled with something that was of huge importance to them.

WarGames felt like a bit of a gamble. As Neville had already seen, Drezdin had already proved himself uninterested in fighting. Neville’s team was short-handed. Maybe Neville would have to work twice as hard, maybe he would have to carry the team on his back.

It also struck him that for Neville to take the crown, he was actually going to have to beat most of the XWF roster. This wasn’t just exploiting one weakness to be sure, this was finding a number of them and knowing when and how to use them.

There were a number of familiar names in this match, Neville had beaten Michael and Finn. Neville had only lost twice and Phantom was one of those losses. Doctor Louis seemed like an unknown commodity. To take his place as a rightful leader in XWF, these were the people Neville had to step over.

I remember thinking to myself that of all the draws we could have had, this might be the most lucky for someone like myself. Three of the four combatants had already done matches against me, even the “toughest one” of the bunch had been pinned by me. If their team name was anything to go off of, “The Panzer Dragoons” should be a good draw for the three of us. These are the three I’m lucky enough to see first round. All can be eaten easily enough individually, I wonder how they’ll do together?

I’ve got a few things to teach these guys, now if you’ll give me time to give the lessons I’d like, I think you might learn some things.

Michael Graves, you remember the battle we waged weeks ago? You remember how because you thought you had been in the XWF longer, and proven yourself more, you expected a victory? Do you remember the end result to that cockiness?

That’s right, the great Michael Graves showed that he couldn’t beat the TV Champion. I’ve already stepped over you once, and I’ll gladly do it again. The problem with you Graves, is you’re still doing the same old shit that causes you to lose time and time again. Mental Focus is once again his weak point, made even more evident by his interactions with his team Captain Panzer. I mean the entire first promo I saw with Graves for WarGames, Panzer bossed him around like the bitch he usually is.

Graves, if you really want to do your team a favour, you need to bring what YOU have to the table. I remember when I fought you earlier, one of the biggest problems I could poke and get you to respond to was who you are and what you did with it. The Michael Graves that had fought his way to greatness and earned himself a spot in the Top 50 of the XWF now takes orders from a man in a clown costume who usually just says “fuck you” to his own matches. Do your thing Gravy, make sure that people know who you are.

Lesson #1 – Michael Graves, don’t allow yourself to simply be a supporting character in this match

Do you even remember the days when you were relevant? The biggest problem I see in you is that you clearly have no idea who you are anymore. That’s why your fucking promos are all about getting murdered and being propelled through time and other useless shit. You’ve come into this match playing Panzer’s game, and it’s not going to help your own team by having two mentally fucked up clowns on it. Seriously Graves, I’m not even mad, I’m just so disappointed in you. If you haven’t realized it, Drezdin might stand a better chance at being named one of the top 50 XWF stars before Panzer would. Yet this week, you’ve coddled his balls like a fan girl at an Usher concert.

Think back to the story I’ve been telling you this week. What happened to royalty when they took advice from awful people? The people revolted, turned against them, and they earned a reputation of being more of a regent than a King. Don’t let the clown mindfuck you this week. Stand on your own two feet and be the superstar your team really needs. I was grateful for your kind words, stating I’m the only shining star on my team, which I vehemently disagree with. But the difference between you and I is that I plan on carrying my team to victory, raising the team to my level instead of lowering myself to theirs.

Do you remember when you could do that Graves? It really seems like such a long time ago.

Neville catches a glimpse of a man losing his shit at a horse race. At the very last second one of the horses pulls ahead, leaving a dejected man holding his own head in disappointment. The agony of defeat was almost too much to bear. Neville wanted to buy the man a Scotch, but this was his own fucking fault.

Up Next, Finn Kuhn! My old buddy from back in the day when he actually had something going for him. This is another man I’ve beaten, back when he was semi-relevant in the company. I remember that he came into the match as a cocky little fuck, and the second I started calling him delusional he lost his shit. I’ve never had another problem with Finn since that day. He was so excited, imagining what the TV Title would be like, and he lost. He lost bad. Finn faded into irrelevance, finding himself in the hunt for the Hart title, I guess thinking that title matters, and hasn’t really done anything since then.

I was quite surprised this week to see Finn’s newest tactic: copy Neville Sinclair. I mean his promo this week sounded like it was a poorly done Neville knockoff, and he still couldn’t finish what he started. Not once did he mention us as opponents, not once did he even mention his own team. It’s like Finn’s living in his own world where he thinks he is the King and everyone else looks at him like he’s delusional.

Could you imagine what would happen if, in every day life, commoners called themselves Kings and expected others to do their bidding? I think, at very least, we would have them mentally checked now, and hundreds of years ago they would have been executed. So here’s the lesson Id like to teach Finn.

Lesson #2 – Finn Kuhn, Don’t Use History if You Don’t Understand History

Look, the credit that I’ll give you is that you’ve obviously dabbled in the historical realm. Using historical figures has actually improved your promos. But the only reason I actually like it, is because everything about your last promo reminded me of me, albeit a much weaker version of myself. The only difference is, that while I stick to telling stories that speak to a bigger meaning behind my matches, you’ve actually inserted yourself into the story like some cocky little fuck.

I mean think about that for a second, instead of symbolically letting the stories stand for themselves and talking about why they matter, you actually want us to believe you’re there somehow there altering history. You take historical lessons from great stories and “Magic School Bus” yourself into them, thus dumbing down any lesson you might possibly teach to anyone listening. Finn, again, I have to say I’m flattered that you would think copying the “Neville Sinclair Template” is the way to step up your promos for a Pay-Per-View. I’m even impressed by your use of Google Translate to write a script for the guy playing Wilhelm.

But at the end of the day, you use history to speak for yourself, you don’t let it speak for itself. And that’s exactly your problem. You’re still cocky and delusional, even more so when you try to twist history and make it say something it clearly does not. Think about why theses matter in research papers. You study the facts, put it together and allow your findings to come together with what you’ve found.

Any asshole can twist facts to make them say what he wants them to, I believe America is discovering this with their current leader. But at the end of the day, all that does is show how uneducated you truly are, and why guys like me can think and talk circles around you.

Neville sees a man in the corner of the shop, not doing much. He wondered his story. Was he there to watch the proceedings? Did he work there? Did he get some kind of odd satisfaction about watching what went on with everything?

It’s funny how that gentleman over there kind of reminds me of Dr. Louis. It’s like there’s one member of the team who has an elevated status and is sitting back watching this shit show of a team. Panzer was lucky enough to grab Dr. Louis in the draft, and of all the team he seems the most normal.

But that’s exactly the problem, Dr. Louis comes across as oddly passive for a match that everybody seems to want to win. There’s no energy, no spark, no magic coming from him right now. It’s like he’s bored with the whole damn thing and nobody knows how to get him interested.

Lesson #3 – Dr. Louis D’Ville, if you’re going to come as the “Mystery Entrant”, bring something Special.

I’ve watched Dr. Louis’ promos since I first entered into the XWF, and I’ve always found myself somewhat impressed by him. Here’s a guy who doesn’t give a fuck and brings it to every match I’ve seen him in, with a few notable exceptions.

Yet, here we come to a Pay-Per-View, and all I can see is him half-assing it. The moment I finally get to fight him for myself, he comes across saying some of the most uninteresting shit I’ve ever heard. Peter Gilmour is a terrible leader, good one! The tv title doesn’t matter, therefore I must be bad! Really good one! Jenny Myst is Chris Chaos’ boy toy! Haven’t heard that before! What the hell man?!

This week they released something quite interesting where they fed all the Harry Potter novels into a computer and allowed predictive text to write a new chapter. Most people laughed at how much it said crazy shit, yet sounded like JK Rowling had written it herself. Is that what you did with the script for this promo Dr. Louis? EVERYTHING you said sounded like every other insult thrown at the three of us, yet we’ve proven these to be false time and time again. Peter has actually chosen a good team, and is surprising me at how good of a leader he can be. I’m trying to pick up this team and carry it the best I can, and am looking much stronger than anyone on your team. Jenny looks like she fucking belongs in the championship picture and is throwing well-thought-through insults in your direction. Can you stop with the fucking copy-and-paste insults that show no real effort whatsoever? It’s an insult to us how little you’re trying, it’s an insult to your team to see you half-assing this, and it’s an insult to the federation that has put hope in you.

You were the mystery entrant, one tasked with bringing something decent to this match, taken with the first pick. Yet of the people on your team, you’ve brought the least amount of shit to the table. The only reason I can think of is that you’re so uninspired by the team you’re on you’ve stopped trying. Is Panzer that bad Dr. Louis? You guys really could have brought the batshit crazy together, but you haven’t. All I hear is the same thing I’ve heard for weeks told to me by underestimating assholes. I guess that’s what you’re going for.

On the street corner in front of the shop sits a busker playing his guitar and singing. He wasn’t very good, but people crowded around him for the spectacle. People crowded around him for the performance, but no one seemed to give money. People liked performance, even if it sucked. Imagine what It would be like if this guy was good?

Finally, that brings me to the Captain, the team leader, the only one in this match who’s actually beaten me, Mr. Phantom Panzer. The man with the most fucked-up head in the XWF. I actually still can’t believe I have to count a loss from this asshole on my record.

The fact that his team has allowed themselves to enter his head is the scariest part of the whole thing. No one really respects Phantom Panzer, no one really expects him to contend for a title shot. Panzer is the least interesting and least impressive member on this team, yet somehow because he’s captain, people cradle his cock and make him feel really good about himself.

Do you know the biggest difference between our team and yours Panzer? Our team hasn’t fallen to the lowest common denominator. Neville is still Neville, Jenny is still Jenny, Peter’s doing his thing, and we’ve allowed Drezdin to fuck off. We’re going to meet later, but we’re not all going to mind meld around a fucked up fantasy from a clown people find annoying. Each member of your team has actually weakened because of that, you haven’t made them better.

Lesson #4 – Panzer, Performance Art is fun until it Gets Annoying and Smug about itself

You do know I count you as no more than a piece of performance art right Panzer? I mean it’s interesting for like a second to see you come, not give any fucks, show what’s in your head and bugger off again. You’re like a Banksy art piece, people are interested in you for a second, and then immediately lose all interest once they realize that you’re just a glorified piece of graffiti.

Do you even realize how little people in this federation take you seriously? I mean your clown gimmick is as close to real life as it gets, because most people fucking hate clowns. The make up, the larger-than-life costumes, the preposterous physical comedy, kids live in fear because they hate everything about it. In many ways, your promos play like a clown’s act. You put on an “I don’t give a fuck” attitude that acts like putting makeup on a piece of shit. Even though it looks like something else, at the end of the day you can clearly see that it’s a piece of shit.

You go loud and big and try to get people to notice you, when all they really want to do is look at the main attraction. The times when you’ve been the main attraction, have you noticed that most people seem to get up and leave their seats? When XWF does give you a chance, it hurts the entire federation. People hate clowns, and people hate your gimmick as well.

Your reliance on yourself, and the world inside your head is ultimately what is going to hurt you and your team Panzer. Every promo I’ve seen from your team has seemed like a Panzer dick stroke. Is that really what captaining a team is about? Every one of your team members have found themselves damaged when they enter into your fantasy. I think that’s a pretty straight-forward symbol for what is going to happen this week with your team.

Do yourself a favour Panzer, change. Move on. Whatever you’re trying to bring isn’t working, and sadly because I’m fighting you this weekend, I find myself stuck watching this shit. The XWF deserves so much better than you.

Neville flips a quarter into the buskers guitar case and walks away.

Educating the XWF since 06/08/17