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Jenny Myst · (12-21-2017)

Have you ever felt that touch from a woman that makes your hairs stand up? Ever feel that soft caress that makes you wonder where it has been your entire life? Have you ever felt that little tickle that makes you want more? Women have a way about that. They can be gentle, caring, compassionate, and they know how to get what they want. Women know that men are weak and will fall over at the simple sight of a woman's reproductive organs. Why? Who knows. Men are simple creatures. Some are more simple than others. Women are a complex rubix cube of emotions. A woman's kiss can be the best thing in the world--literally--but only if they want it to be. Women can decide who they want to feel a certain way. Women can make you the happiest or the most miserable man in the world, and they don't even need to try that hard.

If you find a ride or die woman, your life is complete. If you find a woman who decides she WANTS to make you feel that way, there is literally nothing else in the world that can compare. Men, however, can never get enough. They find a good woman, and they throw it away. They think with their little head substantially more than their big one. A woman's heart is big and can sustain a lot---but it is fragile at the same time. A woman's heart can be a brick wall or it can break like glass. THIS, she has no control over. How she reacts, however, she does have control over. Women can be loyal, but by god can they be vengeful. A woman will never forget, kind of like an elephant. You wrong a woman once and she will remember it for years.

HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE A WOMAN SCORNED

A woman is a warrior. Her body is designed to go through so much. Periods, child birth, you name it. Men don't know the struggle of women. Women are often left out of the discussion when it comes to physical activity because they are looked at as being inferior in that department. False. A woman is a battler. When she wants something, she will fight to the death for it. She will go to hell and back to make sure she gets it.

Why do single mothers get such a bad wrap? They are the biggest fighters of all. Against all odds. Every good team needs a woman. Their spirit is unmatched. This woman.....she has been through so much in her life. She has run the gamut of love, pain, selfishness and selflessness. She has seen it all and done even more. Sometimes, when she was at her lowest point, her woman's intuition kept her battling. Every time he would hit her, she would always get back up. Even when she felt like she couldn't she always would. Bruises and breaks, they would heal. Her spirit, that never broke. Her hope, her desire. Her nose would be sideways, but her head stayed true. Blood can be cleaned. She refused to beg. She internalized it all. Why? Because she was stronger than he tried to make her. The screaming, the fighting, the broken promises.

Where were you?!

Who were you with?!

Why are you getting home so late?!

Out with friends!

God, you ask so many questions!

I wish I never met you!

A real woman is not afraid to ask these questions. A real woman is not afraid of what the answers may be. A lioness, a goddess, a queen. She may end up through the coffee table, covered in shards of glass, and bleeding..........but she will always find a way back up. But when she lays in that bed, she spoons with you, pressing her ass into your torso, she feels her arm around her.........

She feels safe.

She feels wanted.

She's plotting to kill you.

"Get up, you fucking whore!" The voice bellows from above. It sounds spiteful, filled with rage. There is a small of Jack Daniels in the air.

"Whore?! You were with yours all night! I've done all these dishes, vacuumed the house! What have you done besides fuck these chickenheads!"

Cocaine laid on the table next to the bottle you could smell on his breath.

"Shut up! You don't know anything about where I was!"

Another hard shot and you could taste blood. You knew your face was going to be a mess tomorrow. Your entire body hurts, but you push yourself up again. You are wobbling. Your hand touches the table, it is shaking.

The TV has some reality show on in the background. The TV is grainy, but it could just be your eyes. You lunge, somewhere between self defense and unmitigated rage, and you feel yourself lift through the air. The breeze created by you flips your hair as your back feels like 1,000 daggers stab it all at once. There is a loud sound as the table breaks. You are now covered by wood and glass. "Stay down! Goddamnit, stay down!"

You wouldn't. You couldn't. You couldn't feel your legs but you grab the couch. You pull yourself up. You look at the one you "love" through tear stained blurry vision.

"I'll never stay down.......I'm not one of your tramps!"

But you were.

You took a step, and dropped back to one knee. You braced yourself for another hit. It never came.

He picked up the bottle off the floor. Pulling another baggie out of his pocket, because the previous one now covered you like pixie dust, and turned on the porch light. As you drifted in and out of consciousness you heard a loud sniff and a swish.

You turned your head and you saw him sitting there, head in his hands. He was upset over what he did. Sorry, maybe?

You made your way out to the porch, and sat Indian style next to him. You two cried together.

As you cuddled in bed, the events of that night seeming like forever in the past, you held the knife firmly with one hand. He was sleeping, facing away from you. You rolled towards him.

A woman always gets what she wants.

He cheated because he loved the feel of a woman's touch.

As he choked on his own blood, his last thoughts were all we wanted was a woman's touch.

"So it looks like I am a bit late to the party when it comes to air time for War Games. There have already been a bunch of attention-desperate slobs fighting over the airwaves like Ethiopians fighting over a spam can. It has been gross, if I can be honest. Being the only woman in this competition, except for maybe Grande and his band of misfits, I figured maybe now is the time to give a women's input. A little break to all the testosterone fueled mic-hogging. And being a woman of power around here, I may as well take a swing at the top. There are a lot of things that have been bothering me as of late, and most of them stem from the two "favorites" to win this little shindig, The Motherfuckers and Apex.

You can't think "Motherfuckers" without everyone's favorite plus-sized champion, Robbie Bourbon. That's right, I'll start at the top. Robbie, you have dropped your nose into the XWF airwaves for War Games like a box of Krispy Kreme, and have flooded us early on with your same old hero drab with a hint of charm. Robbie, you days are numbered, limited, and you know this. You are lucky to even be champion. If it weren't for Archie Lawson screwing Chris Chaos, he would have beaten you and went on to beat James Raven for the THIRD time to capture that coveted strap. But now, a man who doesn't say more than two words outside of "I'm Hungry!", suddenly feels cocky because he has his buddies around him. Bourbon thinks that his hulking size and new found status as champion is enough to propel his team to victory in this match. Lies. Let me tell you a little something here Robbie....size does NOT matter. I would know right? I've been around the block. Let me flip the script here......let me name of my credentials and save you all some breath while slut-shaming. "Oh my god! Jenny Myst is going to slut shame herself!" Robbie......I've taken 6 inches and had some of the best orgasms of my life. Subsequently, I've taken 13 inches and had to ask him if he was done yet. I'm about to compare you to a whale, Robbie. It isn't a fat joke, though, more like..... fat analogy. Whales are the biggest animals in the ocean. How many times have we seen videos of sharks eating whale carcasses? Being the top predator isn't about size, it is about the teeth. Right now, Rob, you don't have the teeth to hang with the top hunters in the wrestling world. The top hunters in the world will rip you apart, dining off your flesh and using your blubber for nutrients. You have backed yourself into a corner, the worst place a champion can be. The pressure is all on you now, the ceiling just got that much lower. You are suffocating. Most of it is because of the people you have associated yourself with. The Motherfuckers, a shaky alliance, and that is being generous.

It has been a bad week for the Motherfuckers, hasn't it? War Pig lost his belt to a ROOKIE, who proved he wasn't all that great when a true champion like my teammate Neville took him to school with a little Education. Remember back in the day when the Motherfuckers had Jack Cain? What happened to that grill-faced prick? He fizzled out quicker than an old man fart. He was a man who, in my SECOND MATCH, I took to the limit and almost beat. A man who failed to come through in the spot light. Time and time again he was given an opportunity to be something, but he would choke when the stakes were the highest. Good recruiting choice there, Robbie. James Raven? He was a motherfucker at one point also, wasn't he? How did that work out for you? James Raven's little return was a bigger disappointment than getting socks for Christmas. Then when you took the belt from him he disappeared into the abyss as well. So......it was down to two. The revolving door with more bodies running through it than Black Friday at Wal-Mart was down to two. War Pig, his loyalty to you only due to the CTE he has from multiple hits to the head--both in the ring and in the third world--and you. So what do you do then? You reach out to arguably the hottest superstar in the game right now---figuratively, of course. Being "hot" is apparently frowned upon in your little collection of larpers. So, maybe, on a roll would be a better word? You reach out to Engy to try to salvage SOMETHING out of a quickly depleting army because you know that nobody takes the Motherfuckers seriously anymore. You're a failing franchise that just signed a top free-agent with the hopes he can turn everything around. He won't. You are putting all of your chips in Engy's pot, because you know that War Pig is useless and you can't get the job done by yourself. This business would eat you alive, Rob. You need support, but what support do you truly have? Do you really think when the going gets tough that these two will be there for you? War Pig is about himself, and always has been, and Engy is a lunatic. There is no alliance here. You may have bodies around you, Robbie, but you have never been more alone. Look at your promos.....they ooze with desperation and anxiety. Your a hunted man, and you know this. You went out and added a few more buttons to the belt so you could fit it around your waist, and you flaunt it around like it is some sort of accomplishment. Truth is, you won the belt in the weakest time period that XWF has ever had. You are the face of the company during the down time, and now that we are on the upswing you don't know how to handle it. You're the worst champion we have had since Scully. You know it, too. Without the glue of the Motherfuckers behind you, you are NOTHING. The glue is starting to dissolve, and all of the sudden this little idea for world domination looks more like neighborhood police. Your little army of big men is nothing more than mall cops with bad attitudes. I wouldn't be surprised to see The Motherfuckers be the first ones eliminated. You just aren't cohesive.

Just like against Chaos, when you took us on a little Agatha Christie crime novel type narration event, looking for a terrorist that by the end nobody was even sure really existed outside of your mind, you are doing the same thing here. You want to save kids, save Christmas, be the good guy. Robbie, before you worry about any of them, you may want to focus on saving yourself. Stop pretending like you have morals. You know damn well that this entire thing is about your image. You have an agenda here and right now your popular votes are lower than Trump's. You need something to boost your appeal, but it is all a farce. A faux sense of reality. Unlike Chris, I see right through this act. You don't really think you are a hero, but you are trying your damndest to make us all think you are. I noticed in three promos now, you haven't had anything to say about me. Why is that? Becuase you have nothing on me. I am a champion who destroyed an entire division, ran everyone else out of town, and rule with an iron fist over womens wrestling---wrestling in general. I eliminated my competition and will continue to do so. You can't even eliminate doubts.....what happens when Engy wants more and War Pig wants relevency? You can't even control your own horde..........

But your a hero? More like the juggernaut with mustard on his beard.

You are the biggest piece of shit on planet earth. There is nothing worse than fake people, Robbie, and worse than that even is fake people who aren't good at hiding it.

"I said I was shooting for the top, right? Well, lets move onto Jim Caedus, shall we? Another coward hiding behind the security of wanna be body guards, one of whom weirdly enough tried to copy his style. Jimmy......you are certainly in a predicament aren't you? Tag Team Champions with the one single thorn in your side that just won't go away. You are a lot like Robbie, in a sense, because without your boys by your side, you are nothing. Your bond seems to be a bit stronger than his parkinsons stable, but either way, you hide behind them........like him...........

.........just like you always have.

Jim Caedus's best accomplishments have come when he had an entourage. Look at what you have done on your own. You were TV champion, oh boy. You formed AX3 because you knew your career needed jolt in the arm, you knew it needed a pick-me-up. You knew Jim Caedus wasn't a household commodity on his own. So you banded together with two other men who you thought could give your lackluster career a kick in the ass. An unproven Robert Main and a beaten down Micheal Graves. Great move, dick. You see, AX3 wasn't quite as.....whats the word......chaotic as you wanted it to be. You reached out to Chris and I, hoping that this little career move wasn't going to make you look completely stupid. Little did you know that Chris and I were trying to uproot it from the inside out. You found out quick, didn't you?

Where were your little buddies when you found out that the talent on the roster was catching up to you? Graves was doing his best Roy Moore impression and Robert Main was so average that nobody even noticed what he was doing anyway. You relied on Chaos and I to shoulder the load. BUT......you felt safe with AX3. You felt like you could be a leader, like you wouldn't be exposed, like your flaws could be easily hidden.

Without AX3......your nothing but a glorified TV champion with briefcase. Hell without them, you probably wouldn't have even cashed in on Reno either. That is why you tried to keep the dead horse floating as long as you did.

Then you meandered along without a source of direction. You had a couple of shocking losses, a couple of wins that you were expected to have...........but hey, whatta know, Jim has found himself some structure again.

I compared Robbie to a whale, Jimmy you are a sea bass. You are never out in the open, never allowing yourself to be seen in the open ground. You need the rocks, shipwrecks, sea walls. You need structure so you can hide in the shadows and blame everyone else when shit doesn't go your way.

Newsflash: Jim Caedus isn't that good. It won't be long until APEX dies out also and Jim is left floating in the deep end all alone once again. Robert Main flaked on you once, Jim, what makes you think he won't do it again? And Drew Archyle.....please. You are aligning yourself with losers and expecting to win. You are rolling snake-eyes. If you were SMART, which you have proven time and time again you aren't by simply opening your mouth, you would align with Chris and I. You both are the tag champs, I am the best women's wrestler in history, and that way, Jim, we could really run things. Drop the zero's, get with the heros.

But you won't, because you feel threatened by Chris? No. Because you know I am part of that package deal. You don't trust me.......and to that......I say...........

Good.

Apex and The Motherfuckers.......passing fads. Pogs, gameboys, Lugz, yo-yo's, Pokemon cards. Just not sustainable. You want to see how tight this little alliance of yours really is? When your team gets eliminated, see what Main does.......see what Drew Archyle does. You will be all alone, Jim. A lonely little sea bass, whose 'family' has been caught or eaten, and you have to wonder to find more structure again on your own..........

...................prey.

"This is too easy......I haven't had this much fun ripping guys new assholes since...........nevermind. Who do we have left in this shit fest? I see Graves has opened his mouth. Does anyone truly care what he has to say anymore? He announced it himself on twitter that his career is basically over. He is a beaten down old man now. Nobody cares about Micheal Graves. He's obviously senile.

Roy Moore in a Demon Mask Said:"I do want to send a special shout out to the current Knockouts Champion, Jenny Myst. Baby, I can either be the man of your dreams, or the monster hiding beneath your bed. So how about you go ahead and ditch those losers for a real man before I’m forced to show you my darker side?

First of all.................

Second of all.........Knockouts Champion? Ummm......have you been living in 14 year old girls ass the past 6 months? Oh......wait.......

For you to even mention my title and my accomplishments in the same breath as anything having to do with you is blasphemous. Shame on you, Graves. For you to even mention my name in anything that has anything to do with that dumpster fire you call a life or career......

You are a joke and your team captain......what is this, the Special Olympics? How the HELL does PANZER get to be a captain? I guess they will let anyone feel special around here. The inmates run the asylum. He may even be a bigger joke than you are. And Finn Kuhn? Good god, I have seen elementary school dodge ball teams with more fortitude than this debauchery of a squad you have there. I am the least worried about you because not only do you have an inept captain but you--the star of the team--has changed your personality more than a girl changes outfits. We never know which Micheal Graves we are going to get.....but despite all of the costume changes, the result is always the same. You just fail to get it done on the big stage. Every big match you've ever been in.........do I need to go there? Graves is by far the most soiled name on the roster. It is by far the most laughable. Before you open your mouth you might want to look in a mirror because the only Micheal worth a shit......well, he's dead.

And he touched kids too.....

Must be a trend.

A side of you I don't want to see? I don't want to see any of you.

You've got Doc on your team, though, I guess that sort of saves you? No? That wrinkly old sack isn't going to save a team of misfits like this. He probably wants to commit suicide seeing what his team looks like, and I wouldn't blame him.

So when this is all said and done, the top bitch in the business will be standing with her arms raised along side the greatest Television Champion we've ever had, the toughest man in the business, and the most entertaining. We are TEAM X-TREME, and we are going to live up to that name. Everyone likes to give Peter shit, but that dude can shell out a beating like he can take one. I wouldn't want to be in a no DQ match with that guy. Trust me.

That brings me to The Unknown Soldiers. This is a team? Soldier made this all about himself like he usually does. I honestly feel bad for Chris. He is on a team with a methhead who was at the peak of his career and disappeared for almost a year and left us all in the dust. A man who could have been half of one of the greatest tag teams we've ever seen.....left his partner high and dry. Who knows if he is even going to show up to this event....he may pass out somewhere and completely forget. Chris Chaos is basically a one man team. Chasm sucks, and McBride.....wow, he got a bad draw. But if by some grace of god they do get by the team of sub humans who like to roleplay as dragons, that leaves me. Chris........I know you like the back of my hand. I know what makes you tick. I know what you're after, also. Yes, we are an item but I am in this thing to win this thing and I am not going to let you make me trophy.........

A tropy wife, maybe

But a trophy, I refuse.

I am going to turn War Games on its head and turn team X-Treme into Team Perfection..........

And all it needed was a woman's touch.

17-11-1

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