There comes a time in every great fighters life where he realizes that he’s overstayed his welcome. His mind begins to focus more on not hurting himself than hurting his opponent. His body decides that it no longer wishes to work for him, but rather against him instead. The second to last thing to go for an old fighter is his power, and the last thing to go, the very last thing that a fighter will have left when they stay well beyond their expiration date is their name. Long after you stop winning championships, long after you start losing to guys who never would have stood a chance against you back in your prime, the one thing that will still hold true is the fact that the reputation that you built over the course of your career will still be with you. Take Roy Jones Jr. for example. He’s still out there to this day fighting the good fight. Sure, he’s not as fast as he once was. His punches don’t fire off with the same snap that they used to have, and he doesn’t fight the top ranked fighters in the world anymore, but he’s still out there doing his thing and making pretty decent money. There’s no doubt that Roy Jones should have walked away from the world of boxing a long time ago. He should have left while he was still on top, but he obviously loves what he’s doing, and he still does it well enough to earn a living and win a few matches.

I love professional wrestling. Always have and always will. I imagine that even when my time in the ring does finally come to an end, I’ll find a way to remain involved in the product until my dying days. Wrestling is in my blood, it’s a part of me. I know that’s weird to hear from a guy who has only managed one victory over the course of a career that has spanned more than three decades, but it’s true. My son, Cadryn, has had much more success in proving that than I, but the fact still remains.

Now, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I’ve contemplated hanging up my boots and walking away. I’ve spent the past couple of months going back and forth on the subject. The decision didn’t seem all that hard for me. My biggest accomplishments in the world of wrestling so far were the fact that I am one of the most well known and liked losers in the XWF, and the fact that I have been able to use my exposer here to spread the word of Jesus Christ. So I had pretty well made up my mind that it was time for me to find out what the good lord had planned for the next stage of my life.

But then something happened that I never would have expected. At the age of fifty-one-years-old, I won my first match. Sure, it wasn’t a singles match, and yeah, I didn’t actually score the pinfall, but it was a win nonetheless. Something that had eluded me my entire career. You would imagine that I would be awestruck right? Darren Zirado must be floating on cloud nine! Well I wasn’t, instead I was trying to wrap my head around what had just happened. I spent the next week just tryin’ to make heads or tails of the whole situation. Why would the good lord, after three decades mind you, grace ole’ Darren with a win just when he was ready to walk away from it all? My conclusion? Our lord must still have use for me here in the XWF! So I did the only thing that a rational sound minded man could do in this situation.


I prayed!






And prayed….






And prayed some more!






I prayed day and night.








I prayed in the morning over breakfast.










I prayed in the shower.








I prayed at the bus stop.









I prayed on the bus.









I prayed at the grocery store.









I prayed on the bus again.








I prayed during my soaps.









I prayed in my garden.









I prayed during diner.









I prayed at the Elks Lounge.









And I prayed before bed.









I spoke to our lord day and night. I asked him for answers, I pleaded him for strength, and I begged him for the guidance required to ensure that I didn’t fail him in whatever it was that he required of me. One day in the midst of praying while I surfed the internet, I came across an interesting article. The article was about how children and teenagers seem to cling to the ideals of famous role models. Everything from rock stars and rappers to world class athletes. The article didn’t really tell me anything that any of us didn’t already know, but still, in my time of need, it opened my eyes to exactly what the good lord wanted from me.

I’ve always carried a small amount of fame with me. I’ve managed to build about as strong of a fan base as one could expect with the performances that I usually turn in, but if I were going to do the lord's work, something needed to change.

I spent the next week standing in front of the mirror practicing my tough guy talk. Something that I hadn’t even bothered doing since the turn of the century. I snarled and barked. I grunted and even cursed, but then I realized how silly I looked, and how pointless my efforts were. To think that talking a big game, and trying to act like a tough guy would have any effect on the outcome of my matches was just silly. I needed to train, plain and simple.

“Mr. Zirado, let me cut you off right there. I’m getting word that Mr. Sayors is on his way to the studio now. We should be able to get this interview underway shortly.”

Darren seems confused by what the pudgy stage hand just said. Darren tries to make sense of the situation before speaking in an effort to not allow himself to look foolish, but he thought that the interview was already taking place. Hence why he was so deep into his story.

Excuse me son, you say that Steve Sayors is on his way here now?

The stage hand doesn’t even glance at Zirado when he answers.

Yeah, he’ll be here shortly, just sit tight while we finish setting up.

Darren’s face turns slightly red with embarrassment. He didn’t realize that Steve wasn’t here or that the interview hadn’t started. As far as Zirado knew, you just came into the studio and “talked trash”. This was a new experience for Darren since he had never been popular enough in the past to have scheduled interview time.

Suddenly a middle aged man with slicked back dark hair and a cheap JC Penny suit walks into the studio. It’s Steve Sayors and he is quickly met at the door by another chubby man with a neatly groomed horseshoe hairline, this guy is the production manager and he’s carrying a clipboard full of notes outlining the show format and scheduled guest. Zirado sits there nervously staring at the two and waiting for a chance to introduce himself. Zirado hears the production manager say his name. Sayors glances over to Zirado with an irritated grimace on his face. Sayors turns back to his production manager and the two begin to quietly bicker back and forth. This all makes Darren more uncomfortable than he already was and he begins to fidget around in his chair. Finally Steve Sayors yells out at the top of his lungs.

NO YOU IDIOT! WHAT I SAID TO GET ME THE , I MEANT THE OTHER ! THE ONE IN THE FUCKING WHEEL CHAIR!

Zirado squints his eyes and looks around the room, unsure who Sayors is talking about. The production manager is how trying to calm down Sayors and plead his case, but Sayors isn’t being very receptive.

No, No, No, Get that goon out of here! I don’t have time to waste on a nobody!

Zirado is becoming more attentive to the conversation now as he is beginning to think that Steve Sayors may be talking about him.

Listen, when you said to get you the , we didn’t really know who you wanted, since you have been ignoring my phone calls, I had to do it this way.

Had to do it this way? So you had to waste my time and make me look like an asshole, is that it?

No, I mean, I didn’t mean to;

I don’t care what your intentions were. I look like an asshole because you called in a bunch of morons that nobody wants to hear from! Now you are going to send them all home and get the star that I asked for in here RIGHT NOW! Do you understand!?

The production manager silently nods before B-lining it straight to Darren.

Sir, I’m afraid that we made a mistake. It seem’s that there is a scheduling conflict, and we aren’t going to be able to interview you today.

Son, it’s alright. I heard the whole thing.

The production manager looks genuinely apologetic.

I’m sorry…

The production manager walks away, but Zirado continues to sit there for a moment, glaring at Steve Sayors. Darren has never been much for bullies, and if he knew anything about Steve Sayors, it’s that he was an angry little man who threw what little power he had in this company around to make himself feel big. Darren stands up and walks over to Sayors. Sayors doesn’t notice Zirado at first. It’s hard to imagine that he would miss him. Zirado towers over the much shorter Steve Sayors, but Steve is on the phone. He’s barking at someone on the other end about getting him better help.

Finally, Sayors glances up and see’s the very large Darren Zirado standing over him. Sayors pulls the phone away from his ear and places a finger over the mouth piece.

Hey, I thought that I said to get this over grown goon outta here!?!

Sayors puts the phone back to his ear and turns his back on Zirado, but Darren reaches down and places his large hand on Sayors shoulder. Sayors immediately tenses up and looks like he is about to wet his pants. With his other hand, Zirado gently pulls the cell phone out of Sayors hand and brings it up to his own ear.

I apologize, but Mr. Sayors is going to have to call you back after while.

Zirado presses the end call button and gently places the phone on a nearby table. Sayors hasn’t moved an inch. Zirado leans down close and quietly whispers in his ear.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Have you ever heard of that saying before?

Steve nervously nods a yes.

And do you consider yourself a God fearin’ man Mr. Sayors?

Sayors doesn’t answer at all this time. He just stands there whimpering quietly.

It’s alright son, you can tell me the truth.

After a short hesitation, Sayors slowly shakes his head no.

So you don’t fear the good lord almighty? No wonder you’re acting the way that you are.

Zirado glances around the room. He isn’t really looking at anything in particular, he’s just trying to figure out the best way to handle this situation. After a moment, Zirado lets out a sigh. He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a travel Bible. Zirado tucks the travel Bible into Sayors jacket pocket as he whispers.

Listen son, the way that you are acting right now, that’s the Devil. You’ve allowed your will to become weak, and Satan has taken hold of your soul. It’s okay though, you can win your soul back. You can fight the Devil and tell him, NO!!! I WILL NOT SUCCUMB TO YOUR EVIL TRICKERY SATAN! I WALK THE PATH OF LIGHT WITH MY LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST, NO BEGONE!

Zirado pauses for a moment to allow his words to sink in. Sayors is actually trembling slightly after having Zirado yell into his ear.

Read that book son. Read that book and find your way back into the light. I know that you don’t want to be this person. Nobody wants to be evil, but you have to fight to be good. You have to fight to get in the lords good graces, and it’s not an easy fight. Everyday, you will be faced with challenge after challenge. Satan will throw temptation your way every waking moment, and I hate to say it, but you won’t always win the fight. Sometimes to will fall for the Devil's trickery. Maybe it’ll be a pretty girl that you decide to spend the night with. Maybe a rude man that you decide to meet with aggression instead of love. The point is, even if you stumble, even if you fall, you can always find a way back through Jesus. No matter how badly you fumble, you will always have the ability to turn things around and walk the path of the righteous, but it requires for you to put in the work. It requires for you to want to make the change in yourself. Do you want to make that change Mr. Sayors?

Steve nods yes, causing Darren to smile. Darren releases his grip on Sayors shoulder and pats it a few times.

Go find your way Steve. Go and become a better man. I have faith in you, just like I have faith in myself to become a better wrestler.

Zirado turns to walk away when a wheelchair comes zooming past at a remarkably high speed.

MOVE IT !!!

One of the back wheels drives right over Darren’s foot. Darren grabs his foot and hops around on the other as Bilbo Broomer Blimpkinz screeches to a halt and spins his chair around to face Zirado. Bilbo laughs at Zirado while he strokes his huge erection.

Hey Zirado, why don’cha come over here and let me stick this in your mouth and prove how gay you are!

Zirado stops hopping around and places some of his bodyweight on the injured foot. Zirado clenches his fist as he glares at Bilbo.

Awwww, did I hurt your feels !?

Zirado closes his eyes and takes a few deep breaths. The obnoxious laughter of Bilbo is enough to drive someone mad. Zairado opens his eyes and unclenches his fist. Even though he would like nothing more than to knock Bilbo out of his chair right now, Zirado figures it better to turn the other cheek and walk away…


{FIN}

Accomplishments
* Raised Cadryn to be the fine man that he is today.