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Cadryn Tiberius · **06-06-2017, 09:04 PM**

Point. Set. Match.

(Continued from "Oh, IT IS love!")

Las Vegas, Nevada. It is here that I will overcome the odds. It is here that I shall continue to prove myself, and continue to excel. It is here that I will climb down three separate cages to the ground below. And it is here, that I, Cadryn Leslie Tiberius, will begin my reign as XWF Hart Champion. I have traveled many a path so far in my career, and I look forward to traveling down yet another one. Robert Main, the current Hart Champion has proven himself time and time again, but as I said, his time is up. I shall take the reigns, and I shall uphold this honor with the utmost pride and dedication. After my arm is raised in exclamation of my victory, I will extend my hand to Robert Main. I will help him to his feet, I will dust him off, and I will shake his hand. Because though I may not agree with his opinions, he deserves my respect. And I will ensure, that after all is said and done, he will have learned to respect me as well.

Cadryn has pulled over to sleep for the night on his way to the studio in Las Vegas, Nevada. As Cadryn lays in his bed at the Mariott, his phone begins alerting him. Cadryn picks up his phone and checks the alerts. It looks as though Robert Main has cut another promo finally. Cadryn quickly navigates to the XWF website and begins watching the video. After a while the video ends and Cadryn looks a little autistic. Apparently the sheer ridiculousness of that promo dumbed him down a little, temporarily of course. After another minute or so passes, Cadryn gathers himself and begins to record another award winning promo.

Robert, my friend. It truly pains me to see you make such a fool out of yourself once more. I figured maybe I could teach you a little humility, maybe I could teach you to see what I see, but I was wrong. I’m honestly just trying to look out for your best interests, pal. After it’s all said and done, I want you to still have your dignity, your pride, and especially your fans. But the more you go on and on, drudging along, making reiterated points like some type of verbal recycling center, the more I begin to worry.

Also, I don’t know that I would take any type of advice from a man who is intent on killing you. Considering you know what he did before, you should probably stay away from him. That’s a nickels worth of free advice, bud. Though I do not advocate the things he has done, he did make a valid point, if I can be honest. Even he is able to see that there is something more to me than meets the eye, Robert. I’m not your average XWF star, and I don’t even mean that in the physical department. It’s mentally, where I excel. Where cleverly laid traps and ploys come to fruition in a way only described as: Excellent.

“The Essence Of Excellence”

Do you understand what that means, Robert? It means I am the living, breathing, adaptation of the word “Excellence”. It starts in my soul, and radiates through my body much like the central nervous system radiates through yours. I don’t want you to think I’m conceited, that is hardly accurate. There is a fine line between being confident and being conceited, and I’ll admit I toe it from time to time, but I reside on the confident side, Robert. Not confident that I’ll win matches, or championships so much as confident that when push comes to shove, I will triumph. This man also mentioned that I was loved, and many people look up to me. Being a role model for the less fortunate has always been my goal. Growing up I never had anything, we were dirt poor, moving from place to place until they kicked us out. The struggle of poverty played a key role in shaping my mentality, and shaping the man I am today. Albeit, like I said, I had a run from about 18-22 that I’m not proud of, but accepting your past as a means of motivation for your future is nothing to be ashamed of.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret, Robert. The claim that I “use my twisted humor to get underneath your skin.” is a lie. My humor is a defense mechanism, if I’m to be honest. I use it in situations where I’m uncomfortable, when I’m scared, and so forth. I’ve always worn my failures on my sleeve, much like my accolades, and this is no different. Though, sometimes, admittedly, my humor serves a more positive purpose. The King's™ love my comedy routine, and I enjoy doing it for them. I guess, really, it is a little more than just a defense mechanism. It’s kind of a situational weapon. Attacking my mind and breaking me down mentally would literally, and I mean that in every sense and definition of the word, literally be your only chance at coming out of this victorious.

There is a slight problem with that, Robert.

You can’t.

There hasn’t been a man yet able to break me down, able to force me to backpedal from a situation I didn’t think I could win. It’s ironic that you are the Hart Champion, being as you seem to suffer from a severe lack of it, apparently.

“You must knock him down from his spot among the people, bring him down to your level.”

Fitting that the man that salivates at the thought of killing you feels that I am above your level, just as I do. I’ve shown the people who I am, Robert. This man you’re facing, the words that I am saying, the excellence that I’m bleeding out for the fans, that’s the real Cadryn. There is no glitz and glamour here, no smoke and mirrors. This man you see before you is 100% American made and West Virginia born and raised. It doesn’t get much more real than that, friend. I won’t even bother wasting time talking about my fans, you’ll never turn them against me, many have tried, and many have failed.

Oh, no, Robert. There is something much more intriguing that I’d like to touch upon real quick, if you don’t mind.

“”Go after his wife, Robert Main! Go after his wife!”

Hilarious. Maybe you have a knack for comedy after all? Naw, probably not.

Moving on.

”Clearly, wins and losses don’t matter to you.”

Oh, really? You know what, dude, thank you. I had completely forgotten that I’d said that the last time I addressed you. Also, what’s this shit about “famous last words of second place” and “first loser!” Haven’t you ever seen “Talladega Nights”, man? Like Ricky Bobby said “If you’re not first, you’re last.”

I guess that makes me last.

Or does that just make me correct?

Again, as I’ve touched upon before, I know I’m not the greatest. I will never be the greatest, and I’ll never expect anything more than what I’m capable of, and willing to work for. I’m concerned for your mental health status, though. All of the crashes you’ve been through in life may have weakened your frontal lobe. You told me I looked like a foolish , and that’s what everyone thinks of when they think of me.

Um, for the lack of a better term, “duh”?

You’re continuing to feed me lines that I’ve already said, you’re trying to run me over with my own words. As you can clearly see, it’s not exactly working in your favor, eh Bobby? I kind of wish Cadryn was synonymous with the word “loser” I bet I’d get one hell of a royalty check from Webster’s Dictionary.

Now try to keep up, Robert. This next part had me laugh so damn hard I damn near pissed myself. It’s not meant to be funny, but the way you tried to spin it, oh God, man, it’s hilarious!

So I wasted the world’s time by explaining how the rankings worked, huh? Well, I’m glad I did because you obviously have no logical grasp on how they work. All of a sudden, I make a few solid points about us being practically even in our rankings run, as the weeks progress, and now you suddenly don’t care about them? I find that hard to believe. Well, you said they were the past, and that you didn’t care.

The past, eh?

Do you mean like all those times that you beat me in tag matches that you continue to harp on like it’s your only means of survival in this verbal vasectomy?

Again.

Pot. Meet. Kettle.

Wait, but now you’re telling me I need to look at where you are now.

You mean #1, like I congratulated you on, like I first told the world, way before you decided to attempt a rebuttal, dude?

Oh, and yeah, in a sense #1 is plateauing. Where are you going to go besides backwards at that point, genius? It would be great if you could hold on to that #1 spot, then it wouldn’t feel like you plateaued. You would feel accomplished, but, sadly, that spot belongs to me, as like I said, I am and always will be #1. Getting the win over you just means that Paul Heyman pulls his fingers from the cheetos bag, and gets a little cheese next to my name as it’s written on paper. No harm, no foul, Paul.

Honestly, Robert, this is getting too easy.

I’ve said it time and time again, mentally I am on another level, not physically. As for me reaching levels of stardom you’ll never see? I’ve already done that. You keep trying to use this rankings to your advantage, and I’m beginning to think you’re confusing advantage with disadvantage, because you are at a huge disadvantage right now, Robert.

“But in all the rankings, all the rankings you stated, where were you? That’s right, bitch boy, below your daddy!”

Yep, just as I stated the last time I cut a promo, I am #5, you are #1, you are ABOVE me on the rankings. I said it, I did, I did, I did. Why do you keep agreeing to allow me to do stuff, like “Dreaming of beating you”? It isn’t a dream, friend. I’ve had dreams, and those dreams have all come true. This is no dream, sadly, Robert. It’s very real. The cold hard reality of the situation is that I’ve already won. I don’t mean the match or the title, I mean the battle that you continue to try and win. It’s been over since the beginning, you’re just too stubborn to see it. I’ve claimed a residence in the head of Robert Main, and I intend to live there till after High Stakes. I’ve already struck you so hard with my words that you’re going to visit a man who is trying to kill you to what, unlock your inner demon? News flash, dude. HE IS GOING TO TRY TO KILL YOU, DO NOT BEFRIEND THAT MAN!

“Tried” to make a valiant point about how I’m better?

“Tried”?

I think you mean succeeded in convincing the world and even Robert Main himself that I’m better. This is beginning to become uneventful, I at least expected you to battle my wit with a little of your own, but you can’t even do that. Do you remember a MLB pitcher by the name of Randy Johnson? Dude threw like a 100mph fastball that just scared the batter. I’m Randy Johnson and you’re the DH sitting on a full count praying to God I walk you so that you can get out of this with a little bit of dignity.

Actually, better yet, you’re not the batter. You're the bird that Randy Johnson killed with that 100 mph fastball he has. Like the bird, you moved into the path of a moving object, and it just isn’t going to work out so well for you.

You actually think you have me scared, eh?

Well..

I am a little scared.

You’re a pretty monstrous dude with an obvious rage problem.

Alas, however, as I’ve said, I shall push forward. My fears, my regrets, they fuel me. They fuel me to stand toe to toe with my fellow competitors and to leave everything in the ring at the end of the night. Not to mention, if you're as mentally challenged in the ring as you are when you put pen to paper, I’m golden. I could honestly probably bring you a box of crayons and a coloring book and convince you to lay on your back and color while I pin you.

Come to think of it, that would be a sight. I’ve never seen anyone lay on their back to color..

I digress.

Keep in mind, I’ve never once doubted what I’m capable of. Infact, I’ve been doing my best to try and make you understand what I am capable of. I’m trying to help you, son. I didn’t want you to come into this and it be this easy. I tried to warn you in my first promo, and then in my second, and now here, in my third. At this point it’s irrelevant because as I said earlier, it’s over.

Ah, isn’t this a beautiful slice of “I told you so” pie? Would you like another piece, Robert?

Of course you would!

“What I have to say you call mundane and generic, I call it something else entirely, Cadryn!”

Oh, really? And what is that Mr. Main?

“The things that I have to say is something called the truth! You can twist anything up that I say!”

Uh..what? Like a white girl at Starbucks, I can’t even right now. I mean, okay, so you claim that your generic panderings are your version of the truth? Okay, cool, I get that. But what was that at the end? I can twist up anything you say, you said?

Are you giving me permission or making a statement?

We both know I don’t need your permission, but moreover, I haven’t twisted up anything. I’ve expressed my opinions, stated facts, and out maneuvered you at every turn. What you say is “twisting” I consider “Winning”. Not because I had to fabricate material, or recycle someone else's, but because I’m just that much smarter than you, Robert. You underestimated my abilities, you looked down upon me as if I were less than a challenge, if I were nothing but a mere peasant, but it’s the opposite. At this point, I’m the guy without a challenge. I’m not even sure how you beat Robbie Bourbon for the title. Well, I can assume he got stuck in a handicapped stall at the local Arby's, but I’d rather not actually make that assumption, it’s rude.

But wait!

You may have redeemed yourself!

After spouting off about the truth and twisting it up you said:

“That’s the name of the game!”

To the million of fans watching this promo right now, you need to sit down, I think he’s about to bring the thunder!

“But when have I spoke out and been wrong?”

…

Well, you tried, bud, and that’s what counts, right?

How do you manage to walk around, what, with having shot yourself in the foot so many times lately.

I’m just going to go ahead and keep on going, as I feel that the world needs to be aware of your indiscretions, and I really don’t want them confusing your reiterated rubbish with the cold hard facts that I have laid before them.

Okay?

Awesome.

“I want to cement my legacy for generations!”

Finally!

Finally something I convey actually seems to register with you. Of course you want that, every XWF superstar wants that! That’s the real name of the game, dude!

“I want to be something more than what you want, I don’t want to be remembered as a sideshow act!”

Okay, first of all. I’m main stage all the way, baby. I’m the closing band while you’re still stuck trying to get an autograph from the friend of the friend of the guy who thought he saw Dee Snider at the bar the other night.

“You can play the funny guy as long as you’d like, where has it gotten you?”

Your answer was "beaten time and time again."

After a quick deliberation, it has been deduced that your answer is false.

My comedy has taken me places that sadly, you’re never going to see. As I’ve said all along, I just want you to be the best you that you can be, Robert. But the tough guy act, as I said, is an act, nothing more nothing less. You have nothing to offer in the sense of comedy. Honestly, you have nothing to offer in the sense of competition it seems, either. Let this be a lesson to you, brother. Never judge a book by it’s cover, and expect the unexpected.

“You have no true grit.”

Is that so? So, going out night after night, show after show and losing matches, while still maintaining a positive outlook and adonis like physique isn’t enough grit for you? You question my courage, but stand amazed that I just keep on moving forward after my many losses. Which is it, Robert? Are you impressed with my fortitude and my ability to bounce back or are you convinced I have no courage or resolve?

I assure you, both of those tanks are full. I could probably spare a little if you’ve got an empty jug I could put some in. Lord knows you could benefit from it, believe you me.

See, this is fun, Robert. It’s like a game show where everyone wins! You get the luxurious prize of “Life Lessons” by Cadryn and I get the fun of being able to pick and choose all the things to pick apart!

It’s a win, win, really.

“Maybe if you’d pull The King's dick from your mouth for a split second, maybe you’d see who you truly are. Of course, you have to wipe that white creamy The King’s ransom from your face as well!”

Oh hey, look at that, gay jokes.

Clever.

So let me see if I’ve got this right, real quick. You’re saying that in order to see who I am, to claim the ultimate prize of self realization I’d have to wipe the semen, or King’s Ransom as you called it from my face first? So the King's Ransom is like that holy grail type stuff, and apparently that’s supposed to be on par with Theo’s semen?

I’ll have you know that Theo’s semen is far more incredible than any semen you’ll ever produce.

Also, to be respected by the companies 4 biggest legends isn’t something to feel bad about. You people keep trying to make me feel like I’m stupid, or that I’m the one who is in the wrong situation. Are you kidding me? Theo, Doctor D’Ville, John Samuels, and John Madison are four of the nicest men I’ve ever met. You do realize in your quest to write me off as the bad guy, you’ve failed, right? As a part of The Kings™ I uphold the honor and pride of doing things for the betterment of the kingdom. IE: The XWF.

So if you wanna crack jokes about semen and homosexuality, by all means feel free.

It’ll only stand to make you look weaker getting beaten by a “homosexual” you don’t respect.

“I know that I talk a lot, I know that I’m cocky, well, very cocky! But why wouldn’t I be?”

I’m glad you asked!

Let’s go ahead and pretend. I’ll even let your ignorant ramblings take point in this demonstration, how’s that sound?

So as you haphazardly said, after contradicting yourself, of course, the past doesn’t matter.

Alright, man, deal.

So here in this moment right now is the only thing that matters.

You wanna know why you have no reason to be cocky?

I’m giving you half the effort I could, and still I dodge, block, and side step every failed attempt at offense you’ve thrown at me. Can you really feel cocky about the situation when it’s so very obviously one sided, Robert?

It’s pitiful. I expected so much more from you. I’ve done nothing but show you respect, try and help you out in the best way that I know how. But every time I extend a hand you bat it away like a child.

It’s like, if we were in school, you’d be the jock and I the nerd. You’d threaten to physically harm me until I did your homework for you. And I’d do it, because I’m fairly passifistic when it comes down to it. All you’d have to do is write your name on the paper and turn it in.

Along comes Robert, who somehow misspells his own name, and get’s an F.

You can’t blame me for trying to help you in life, especially when you refuse to accept it.

You said that no one is on your level when it comes to wrestling in the ring, and I’ll give you that. You’re a hell of a physical competitor with enough scars and broken bones for two men. But you’re not the best, you see. You’re a great athlete, honestly, you are. But you aren’t the best. And in situations where you aren’t the best at something, you need a trait to fall back on, and you don’t even have that.

When my physicality fails, I rely on my mind to excel me through situations, and guess what?

It works!

“I don’t know your potential? I’ve bested you two other times in tag matches!”

Ah, dude. I’m honestly getting tired of having to throw these back in your face. So I have to ask once again, Robert. Does the past not matter, or does it? You can’t seem to keep your mind made up, and it’s terribly frustrating for someone of my intellect.

“You are the fucking definition of loser!”

You have an uncanny ability to memorize things I’ve already said and then repeat them almost verbatim. Are you an actor? I mean aside from acting like you’re gaining any type of ground here, that is.

“Generic tough guy, that’s your best shot?”

Nope. But I’d be happy to rewind this promo for you and let you hear them all again!

So now, you want to get serious. You seemed to get heated at my comments about not knowing how hard life can be. Look dude, I feel bad for you, I do. You’ve been through a lot and it’s obviously had some effects on your mental capacity.

So you go on for a bit about the tragedy and how you “know how hard life can be.” and I start to think “Maybe he finally understands what I’m trying to do, maybe he understands I just want what is best for him!”

Nope.

False alarm, people, move along.

“I know where I stand, you are the one confused about where you do!”

Uh, no? Fairly certain I’ve explained about 100 times already this week my stance on everything and where my lines are drawn. Is your comprehension that bad that you don’t understand my voice?

Oh so you’re moving up while I float between mid pack and the back of the pack?

So you remember that time I explained the rankings to you, and how on paper you and I are pretty evenly matched, etc?

No?

Well, shit. Guess I’ll have to explain it again since you continue to get it all wrong.

So for weeks, you, and I, Robert made moves up and down the rankings. Sometimes we moved up, others we moved down. So now, there is a new ranking out. A ranking sheet that places you in the #1 spot, which is awesome. Again, congratulations!

But you see, Cadryn moved up five spots this time. He managed to get from top ten to top five in one jump. So, I can’t sit here and say that I am ranked above you, because I am not. What I can say, however, is that I am and have been for a little while far ahead of “back of the pack”.

It’s probably a good thing you don’t live your life based on moral victories and false hope like you said. I imagine those two situations would begin conflicting with one another pretty quickly. That’s like saying “I helped an old man cross the street, go me! I think I can beat Cadryn..”

Do you see why those two can’t coexist peacefully?

So now that you’ve exhausted all of the reiterated material I touched on twice already, you decide to try and do your own thing. That’s commendable, I respect it.

I just wish it wasn’t so hard to tolerate.

The sheer amount of ridiculous followed by a strong dose of ain’t no way in hell is pretty hard to swallow here.

“Now I see you claim to be this loving and caring husband wrestling in the XWF to put food on your table at night. That right there is a true man. Honorable, only if it were true! If you were this amazing husband you claim to be then why risk everything for your very own personal gain? You are literally risking it all for what, Cadryn?”

Let me stop you right there, Robert.

Admittedly, I can see where the lines blur and sacrifice starts to look like betrayal, I get it.

But, once again, like most of the things you tend to say, it has no merit.

I love my wife more than anything in this world, son. She is the sunshine of my life, the most beautiful woman in the world, and she’s my everything. Here’s the thing about the XWF, Robert. When you sign that contract and agree to fight someone, win or lose, you still get paid. No, it isn’t quite the payday that I’ll be making soon when I’m Hart Champion, but it isn’t bad money either. I can’t even tell you the definition of personal gain because it’s always been about anything and anyone but me. My wife, my parents, my dog, hell, even you. I’d sacrifice for you, Robert, before I’d buy myself a free sticker. Everything I claim, is practically gospel, son. Not to mention I own a farm, and a highly profitable Bacon empire known as “Tiberius Farms Bacon”. You should really do your research before attempting to drag my name through the mud. Just like normal with you, I came out clean on the other side.

“You’re not a husband, you’re a joke. Putting yourself before your wife you should be ashamed of yourself.”

Tell me more about going out here and giving it my everything, every time, is putting myself before her. She doesn’t have to work or want for anything because of the sacrifice I agreed to make when we said “I do.”. In sickness and in health, I vowed to protect her and I make good on that everyday of my life.

You really don’t have a leg to stand on anymore, dude.

You’re grasping at straws, my man.

Oh so now you’re going to take my wife?

I’m fairly sure that’s kidnapping, guy.

That’s illegal.

Jesus, you Ax3 boys really bonded, didn’t you?

All y'all sitting around plotting kidnappings and such.

That’s not healthy.

I’ll just go ahead and summarize the rest of this for you, and in the process answer questions and make points and such.

Yes, her name is Natalie, and yes she is very pretty, thank you.

I have done well for myself, she’s an amazing woman with a heart of gold!

You wouldn’t marry a woman that looked like her because your face looks like ALF if ALF had a shitty haircut, and a vagina for a chin.

And then it continues eventually getting graphic and less and less interesting.

Not because he is threatening to fuck my wife, but because it’s not even interestingly stated. Like the rest of his career, and his looks, and his skills, it’s all bland and boring. You spent all that time cooking up insults, and thinking of the best way to get under my skin and you couldn’t even make it entertaining.

Well, kitten, I’ve got news for you..

You failed. You talk a lot about her ass and her vagina, and how good she looks for a girl you wouldn’t typically give a second look. Do you want to borrow Mobert Main? So long as you wash him with acid, he should be okay after you’re done, right? You also have a few other things wrong, as well.

I know, we’re all surprised.

Michael Graves knows my wife personally. I know he can be a monster, but that’s a territory even he won’t wander. Not to mention, my wife is like 29. That’s way above the acceptable age according to Graves. As for Jimmy, we’re cool. Jimmy and I have a very weird friendship, and though we’re technically enemies, aside from the Savage takeover, him and I have barely crossed paths out of respect for one another. So again, tell me more about this little gang bang that you plan for my wife.

Might be hard when you’re the only dick in the room.

That’s a play on words, in case you didn’t catch that.

Who am I kidding, of course you didn’t!

As for Trax, well, honestly, he might be the one to take the call to arms so to say. But honestly, can’t he like just teleport or something like me? If he wanted to do it, he’d just do it. Not talk a big game and then puss out at the last second.

“Omega Loads”

Really?

Couldn’t you have been a little more creative, Bobby?

I guess I’ve expected more than I should have.

Well, I do believe I have once again drove the point home, sir.

Also, when Natalie brushes her teeth it’s with a toothbrush.

Who brushes their teeth with a dick, that just seems counterproductive.

Bye Robert!

As Cadryn ends the recording, he smiles, seemingly accomplished, before pocketing his phone and laying back down.

(To Be Continued..)

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