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Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-21-2016)

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-21-2016)

De Loa, dey shake dere head in disgust. Is dis what de country has come too? Z is disappointed.

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · **09-21-2016, 04:33 PM**

This Country has come into difficult times. Healthcare, infrastructure, security, both economic and national, all carry a myriad of questions among you and the American public.

I, Robbie Bourbon, have solutions. I am ready and able to lead us further in the 21st century, and I am what America deserves.

Thank you.

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-21-2016)

[Image: 20141016-Bodhi,_Sinn-1044-EditA_tn.jpg]

It's only Logical.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · (09-21-2016)

"What about the allegations that you support child molesters? Your time with Pest makes it pretty convincing that you favor kid fiddlers."

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-21-2016)

De children shall have vengeance on Bourbon.

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · **09-21-2016, 08:03 PM**

Those allegations are absolutely preposterous. It is true, that I did work with noted Vietnam veteran and father of two, Pest, in the past, and while we did have our differences at some point, he has always operated under the strict constraints of the law, and while he does prefer young girls, it was always legal for him to do so in the states in which he did so.

If the American people want a federally mandated age of consent, then I will be glad to work towards instituting such measures. As far as pedophiles and sex offenders of any kind in our country, we must lock these people up, and give them the treatment they deserve while they pay their heavy debts to society, as well as nurture and help those who were victimized to grow and become happy, healthy, American adults. I have many supporters who were molested as children, and I am proud of them, Mr. Smackins.

As yet, I have no evidence that Joy Payne is affiliated with any terror groups whatsoever.

Thank you.

Next question?

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-22-2016)

If you get elected, will Jacob Sartorius and The Kardashians be publicly executed?

~~Peter Fn Gilmour~~ · (09-22-2016)

u do know trump is winning right?

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · (09-22-2016)

"I need to check the inside of Joy's vagina for proof of a lack of terrorist activity. Can you oblige this?"

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-22-2016)

Z has de President would ensure all Americans have dere day. Frodo shall be a member of de cabinet as Chief of de Oval Orifice.

Jamaican Jimmy · (09-22-2016)

Wat be your position on makin' de weed legal, mon?

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-22-2016)

It shall be a cash crop, with no limitations on farming, my Irie brethren.

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-22-2016)

Mr. Frank, if tackiness were a punishable offense, I feel a great many manufacturers and businesses in our country would go under. Fake vomit, microwaveable pizza, people who put Calvin and Hobbes decals of Calvin pissing on something, people who have the silly Darwin version of the Jesus fish, guys who only ever want to talk about anime in public and look at you like you're under-educated for not watching Japanese cartoons, cashiers at gas stations who don't know how to give you your energy drinks at the two for four dollars rate even though the signage is everywhere denoting said two for four dollars rate, people who hang kitschy banners bought at Michael's or Pier One Imports outside their front door, guys with facial tattoos, the concept of calling people who dye their hair vibrant colors 'mermaids and mermen', the XBox Kinnect, the fact the Cleveland Browns look like a giant Wonka bar every October when supporting breast cancer research, also ugly ass throwback uniforms like the Broncos and Steelers wear occasionally, and Joe Buck. Well, I take that back, Joe Buck, FOX sportscaster, will be immediately shipped to Guantanamo and asked to talk about a team without referring to the team as 'these'.

Thank you.

Mr. Smackins, I can not oblige as I have yet to get incontrovertible evidence showing that Joy Payne would in fact have anything up her vagina. Her income tax returns always list a full palette of tampons yearly, which leads me to believe she actually has a tampon up there occasionally, which leaves little room for a bomb or other weapon of terror. I do, however, have it on strong authority that something is up Amy Schumer's craw, and you are authorized to use whatever means necessary to find out what is going on inside her vagina. I suggest a nice candlelit dinner and some charm, maybe laugh at her jokes, though I feel she'd be pretty quiet on a date and you'd have to make her swoon.

Thank you.

Mr. Jimmy, I feel that for far too long, marijuana has been a resource our country could have utilized to full benefit. I will indeed work towards decriminalizing cannabis, allowing yourself and other Stoner-Americans the right to grow and consume it. Right now, cannabis is perhaps the greatest non-taxed revenue source in our great nation, and the act of taking it off the list of banned substances will not only lessen the time our law enforcement officers across the country have to spend on it, allowing them to collect violent criminals and deal with more severe issues in this country while lowering the expenses for detaining those who would be convicted, but it will also allow your locality and state to tax it appropriately and earn more revenue, swinging our economy into an upward trend.

Furthermore, I will be initiating a retrial for Mumia Abu Jamal.

Excellent question, thank you.

Now, while I am sure I will face many critics and opponents in my term, such as Mr. Z, the disregarded reject from Juggalo Championshit Wrestling and possible bath salts enthusiast, I will still move steadfastly onward and upward.

Next question?

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · (09-22-2016)

Your agenda is de same as all dose before you. You platform refuses to acknowledge issues by making empty promises. How exactly do you plan to fix de budget, or straighten de healthcare. What is your plan on education, or you standing the general well being of de American people, hmmm?

Prof. Bobby Bourbon · **09-22-2016, 11:29 PM**

The budget is a difficult issue to tackle, to be sure. My plan is to rework the IRS to collect from each state in a three year incremental plan, rather than from you or any other tax paying citizen or resident (businesses will be a little different since they can span across state borders). The more federal funding is needed in a state, such as for the maintenance of our infrastructure or the requirements needed for homeland security, the higher the tax bill for each state. This will eliminate pork from inflating tax code changes, while making sure tax dollars go to the municipality or state you live in first, while also shoring up our Gross Domestic Product by ensuring a great idea for one district does not become the frivolity of another's, also providing each state with a means to tax more freely while closing loopholes that can be found between paying the state and federal government. The caveat will be tax breaks given to each state which is spending it's tax dollars on employing hard working Americans, incentivising job growth and that your state will do more to provide better education to ensure a stronger job market.

Healthcare in this country is another huge issue, specifically the huge, nationwide companies responsible for providing medical insurance and pharmaceuticals. These corporations will be given incentive to lower the costs of their products, thus providing more affordable service, based upon the number of patients they need to treat, with their tax dollars going to a new Department of Healthcare. All those IRS employees who would no longer be needed would fill the roles of this department, which would monitor and audit medical practitioners and pharmacies to prevent them from abusing their position to deny care to those who are less fortunate. If you are a medical practitioner in this country, you have an EIN, and we will provide incentives to those who provide care to more at more affordable prices in a very simple way.

The FDA will start manufacturing pharmaceuticals.

For those who are concerned that their dividends or returns on investment may be hampered, I can promise you can look forward to enjoying those same funds by purchasing federal drug bonds, giving all Americans an opportunity to invest in America on the promise of returns. Now, I can see where some would believe we wouldn't be fair competition to Pfizer, AstraZeneca, and GlaxoSmithKline, but all you need to do is look towards FedEx, UPS, and DHS and see how they thrive while sending you a bill via the U.S. Postal Service. As long as the FDA can and will compete by offering medicine at a more affordable rate, the only thing that can happen is a win for the American people. Furthermore, if your state has to provide these drugs to you, your state will see further breaks from their tax bill to the IRS.

Excellent question. Thank you.

Next question?

Lyianna Properchev · **09-23-2016, 06:14 AM**

Answer this batman, why should I vote for you? I mean what have you don't for this great nation you call u.s.a.?

Lyianna Properchev · **09-23-2016, 06:16 AM**

(09-23-2016, 06:14 AM)Lyianna Properchev Said: Answer this batman, why should I vote for you? I mean what have you done for this great nation you call u.s.a.? Just promis me that you won't get beat by trump or Clinton.

Dillinger · **09-23-2016, 09:58 AM**

"I don't vote."

"However, even if I wanted to, I can't."

"There are certain... restrictions, that prevent me from voting."

"Folks who were deemed mentally unsound, aren't allowed to voice their opinion on such things."

"Hey but maybe if you win, that can be one of the things you change."

"I probably still won't vote but maybe there's some lunatic out there who might. Unknown Soldier seems like the kinda fella that might enjoy the prospect. Maybe."

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