[We are live in The Hell Hole, World Sports Entertainment's resident arena in DisneyWorldLand, CaliFlorida. The fans are non-existant except for a few coked up teens in the front row. Kruzifix and Zorlax Firling have just finished a match together, and are heading out of the ring. They step through the curtains... before the lights cut out. "Move This" by Technotronic hits, and the crack-addicted teenagers throw up. The WSE-Tron displays an image;]



[A hot pink spotlight appears mid-ring, and two men are standing in the ring; ]





[Only they're both dressed in DH logo shirts, The bald guy in a hot pink tee with black logo, the fez-wearing gentleman wearing a black tee with hot pink logo. They both hold hot pink glow sticks and wave them around in the air. One of the teens randomly throws up again. The bald guy throws the sticks into the stands, and they both smack the teenagers in their pimply foreheads. He grabs a microphone.]

Jack Hoff : As all you fuck knuckles should know by now, I am former-XWF member Jack Hoff, not to mention owner of this crummy company, World Sports Entertainment-- Get the Wrestling OUT!! And beside me, as always, is the one and only Mike Hunt, my long lost third cousin!! WSE, and far more importantly, XWF! Soon, the two of us will be meeting two bums named Ted and Dave. No last name. What the fuck is this shit, we're two WILD AND CRAZY PARTY DUDES with talent to spare and we're facing to Union lackeys in our BIG DEBUT? Fuck that shit, Mike, tell 'em how it is.

Mike Hunt: Ted and Dave, Dave and Ted, sounds like a buddy cop movie to me. But more importantly, we have never seen two more pathetic wastes of skin and bone than the two of you nutless nutjobs! We're gonna rip ya apart, we are! We're gonna take ya to the woodshed, we're gonna show ya how two REAL MEN do it! And then we're gonna eat at Wendy's, cuz that's how we fuddamukkin ROLL!!

Hoff: Ted, if you're smart, you'll ditch that Dave guy, cuz he's probably holding you down. Why? Cuz he's black. Everyone in this fed hates black people, so we figured it'd get us ahead to point out that you're teamed with a N***** so you're probably gonna lose for some unknown reason. We were also told to cuss a lot cuz that's what all the cool kids do. Fuck.

Hunt: Also, women are all baby-carrying, kitchen-dwelling hoochies who should never, EVER fight a man or they'll lose cuz they don't have a penis. Oh, and we need to bring out a vat of shit some time Jack.

Hoff: Why would that be, Mike?

Hunt: Cuz it's what all the young whipper snappers are doing these days, it's cool, it's hip, it's EDGY! Feces, cuss words, racism, sexism, and don't forget RAPE! Jack, you want me to rape you, it'll probably get this WSE fed thing ya got going on ratings it's never even seen before! It might even beat the 3am Full House rerun on Nick at Nite!

Hoff: Nahhh, I don't swing that way, but'cha know who does?

Hunt: Who, Hoff, enquiring minds wanna know!

Hoff: Frederick Ward, aka Frodo Smackins! He's a bisexual midget who once fucked a dog! But at least the dog anus probably felt better around Hunt's cock than that table our esteemed Warfare GM dick-rode!

Hunt: OH MY!

Hoff: The XWF is so good even guys like 15 Shows can't help but praise it! He even said it was childish! And you know children know what's cool! Lookit Kid Kool, he fucked a toilet once.

Hunt: .... He did?

Hoff: No.

Hunt: ...

["Move This" hits once again and Hunt throws his two glow sticks into the audience and they both land in the frat boy's crack cravin' mouth as he vomits and he chokes to death.]

--end--