Gilly Dick hits Calix in the throat, then collapses on top of him for a pin.

Hey, Calix, how's it going? Pretty boy. Is it interesting for you to be pinned by a penis? Probably not. You look like the kind of guy who likes to be pinned by anything that'll sit on that pretty face. No, that's not a jab at being gay. It's more a jab about you being thirsty as a mother fucker. You know, because anyone so obsessed with himself he probably hasn't used his squidgy didgy much. It's ok to be a virgin, or inexperienced. I mean, it's not like you've had tons of offers. Or much interaction with people. Unless you count the fact that you fought CJ Sharpe, and then stepped away. You wanted to prove something to us by fighting the biggest pussy this side of Morbid Angel's face. It's ok, man. I know you're not man enough to fight real opponents. If you were, you wouldn't have settled for scrubs like Tommy Wish, TJ Wallace, or CJ Sharpe. You miserable fuck of a man. Listen up, Princess, cut your hair, grow some cajones, and stop being such a goddamn drama queer.

You want to prove to your dad that you're not a massive waste of his chromosomes? How about you grab ahold of me and beat the ever loving shit out of me. Beat me like I owe you money. Beat me until I throw up, or you can keep acting like a bitch and taking pictures in the bathroom of an IHOP while you hope the girl you paid to tongue your asshole in 30 minutes doesn't have the Hep. Spoiler, she does, and might wanna drop the S in She. Again, no knock, you insecure bitches need to find your kicks where you can. But, you know, I don't have to like it. In fact, I could probably petition to have you banned from TV for hiring a Drag Queen to tongue your hairless ass in an IHOP while you take selfies and yell racist shit at her. Look at Hulk Hogan. You make me so sick I think I'm going to throw up.

Gilly Dick throws up all over Calix. It's yellow, and thick. Uh oh, Gilly Dick might have an infection.

So, now that you made me lose my lunch, it seems to be out in the open that I've got an infection. Are you going to try and use that for ammo against me? Of course you are, because you're fucking weak sauce, like the load I just coughed up on your chest. That's what you are. You're my diseased baby juice. Go retire, bitch boy.

Calix kicks out and slaps Gilly's dick sending it flying off of him. Calix then rushes to a nearby janitors closet where he proceeds to spray on Lysol like it's fucking body spray. He then puts on a pair of latex gloves and grabs Gilly's dick. Finally he shoves it in a jug of bleach, closes the lid, and proceeds to talk to the jug as Gilly's dick screams in agony on the inside.

Calix: Well you know what, that's what you get for being.....

Calix puts on sunglasses.

Calix: A little prick.

Calix pauses for a moment with a big grin on his face.

Calix: Your god damn right I said it, fuck off! Now the fact that you were ever attached to Peter Gilmour's body means that your right to insult anybody should basically be revoked. It's Peter Gilmour! I walked by that animal and almost died from the smell that was coming from him so lord knows how many times in your life you've actually been washed. Now I won't make any jokes about you never getting any because that just plain wouldn't be true, from whatever that bitches name was he had when he first started wrestling, to Rose Smith, to Maria, Peter Gilmour has always had some nasty bitch willing to have sex with him. You know, even if some of it was diseased vagina, it was still vagina right? I have to know though, how was it spending a good chunk of your life buried in Rose Smith's ass? Everybody knows that she was a tranny so you obviously spent a good portion of your life plowing through her shit. Yet again, you seem to think you have any legs.... er... balls to stand on while you're throwing insults out at me.

Also, in case you had your head buried somewhere in Fontanna and missed it, I was just sucking face with two bitches in my last promo. So obviously I know a little something about picking up women, not to mention the fact that I'm a fucking god! Women kneel and pray to me all the time, if you catch my drift. I doubt it though, I'm sure everything I'm saying is going well over your little head just like everything else does. You actually think that the opponents that I've disposed of so far is where it's going to end? Aww, that's cute. Bet that isn't the first time somebody has said that to you huh Gilmour's dick? Regardless, you're just another one in a long line of opponents that lost to me. Now get the fuck out of my sight you disgusting, worthless, two inch dick.


Calix punts the jug at least 60 yards.

Gilly Dick is picked up by a random kid, and thrown right back at Calix. The jug hits him and breaks open, sending them both to the ground, with Gilly Back on top.

You deaf kiddo? I never said you never got laid. I said you don't get laid as much as you'd like. Also said you have to pay people. You never showed that they weren't hookers. Jesus, I'm the dick with no ears, and you're incapable of hearing. You denying hiring Conchita down by the IHOP? And what the fuck were you doing in an IHOP anyway? You looking for extra work what with your aversion to the ring? Oh, I know, Calix fought one in a real match, and have a few pin attempts, he must be special and a real fighter. Wait, no, that's not right at all.

Thanks for rehashing his badly Peter treated me, that's just such a friendly thing to do. Show the world hard life I've led. And the answer was 12 times he washed me. Twelve. Almost as many men as you've blown. Because you love the idea of everyone loving you. No jab at being gay, it's totally fine, as you've stated it's ok to be gay or thirsty. You just need to stop being so vain and actually pretend to care about people. Sad, man, you're having to get dating advice from a dick. Literally.

Now, I don't think you'll be done fighting in the ring, but I think you'll have few and far between, and most of them will be worthless opponents, easy wins. Because that's who you are, lazy and uninterested. You're just want to try and say you're halfway decent, but really you're not. You're just another boring pretty face wanting to scoot by. You are exactly like the time Barney tried to rejuvenate his career by having someone not fat and disgusting come around using his name. That's you, Barney Green's failed career boost. Good for you.

I do wanna know how many boxes of anal bleach do you have to use to keep that thing clean enough for Conchita? Or, do you just let her clean it with her tongue for you.

Calix kicks out and then kicks Gilmour's dick making it bounce off a nearby wall.

(08-19-2015, 09:57 PM)Dick of Peter Gilmour Said:

You know, because anyone so obsessed with himself he probably hasn't used his squidgy didgy much. It's ok to be a virgin, or inexperienced.

It's ok to be VIRGIN or inexperienced you weaselly little piece of shit. Good effort trying to squirm your way out of your fuck ups though, much better than Gilmour would be capable of. However seeing as squirming in and out of places is your job, I expected better. Again, I'm sure that's not the first time you've heard somebody say that. And yes, you moron, I'm denying hiring any hooker, ever! I get that you've been attached to Peter Gilmour for most of your life and that has probably been how he has gotten every woman that has ever been with him but I'm not Peter Gilmour, obviously. As you've pointed out thirty times, I'm vain and I have good reason to be. Yet for some odd reason you think that somebody who looks as good as I do would ever have top pay for it? Again, with logic like that it's obvious that you once belonged to Peter Gilmour.


I love how you make the biggest fucking leap to judgement I've ever seen too. You somehow know when and who I'm going to fight? Based on what exactly? Your keen penile intellect? I would say that you were pulling all of that bullshit out of your ass but.... well... You're a dick. A worthless disease riddled shrinky dink who will never be anything except a slight annoyance to everybody who comes into contact with you. Plus....

(08-19-2015, 09:57 PM)Dick of Peter Gilmour Said:

You're just want to try and say you're halfway decent.

You're fucking starting to talk like that Tommy Wish, spit it out dickhead. On second thought, no, do not spit it out, DO NOT! But to recap, you're small and worthless, you've done nothing but make up a bunch of shit that sounds exactly like a dick thought it up, you've managed to sound like Tommy Wish, and imagining people tonguing my asshole is apparently what you're into. If that doesn't scream winner I'm not sure what does.

It's alright though, you're a born loser just like every other Gilmour. But I want you to remember all of the idiotic bullshit that you made up here for when you see me in the ring next because I'm going to make sure I bury one of the better wrestlers in this federation just to make you look that much worse than you already do.

Clearly comprehension isn't your strong suit, it's ok. I did say or inexperienced. And later discussed you hiring drag queens for sex acts, and previously referenced having people sit on your face. You fucking Charleston chew. Let's get it out there. I'm a hopping talking penis, I'm bound to make fuck ups when talking, since you know I'm a goddamn dick. But, you want to know how I know you're gonna stick to the easy wins, Barney. Cause I can smell Pussy. I smell pussy real well, even that Testosterone Spray you blast yourself with doesn't mask the smell of rotting fish coming from betwixt your nethers, and boy does it make a Dick hungry. So, to recap, you're incapable of comprehending English. You pay hookers to tongue your ass in IHOP bathrooms, and you're boring.

This is why you have to pay hookers, Barney Jr. Because you may be moderately attractive, a solid 5.5, but you're boring beyond measure. You're always on about being a god, almost as if you're reading from a script written by a ten year old with a LoL account, and a lot of time to browse Wikipedia. Hey, it works for you, though. Just look at how well you did in Asgard... No wait. It doesn't. Look how good you're doing down here. Nope, draggies tonguing that shitter in an IHOP at 4 am on a Wednesday morning. Yeah, no, you're fucked. Take it from me. It's ky job to know about fucking. Wanna know something funny, though, Princess. Even though Peter makes questionable choices, he's never had his hole tongued by a draggie at 4 am on a Wednesday in IHOP. He's never had to pay for it. So, guess you're less than Peter. I dunno how you should take that. Probably up your shitter like you do everything else, slick.

Or, is this the part where you drop more cliche Gilly jokes, because it seems to be all you and Isles are good for. Or, is this now when you realize this is too much effort, and you run away with your pussy lips tucked up into your belt, you gaped coward. Maybe cry for daddy to smite your foes, and cut your meat for you. Or, are you one of those vegan pussies? Since we know you're definitely afraid of anything that can fight back. You seriously disgust me. You disgust Josh Duggar. You disgust Ron Paul. You disgust America. Get the fuck outta here. Grow some nuts and then try and come back when you're worth shit. We'll be waiting. Or, more likely our great great great grandkids will be waiting. Pussy.

Gilly Dick is assisted by a big titted slut who slaps Calix, which sends him to the ground. Dick pins Calix.

Calix kicks out again because this try hard dick can go fuck itself.

Hey dick, here's a lesson in comprehension for you. If you were going to talk about the oh so many ways I fuck and get fucked, why mention being a virgin at all? Perhaps because you're sloppy as fuck which is exactly why 90% of the shit you say is fictional. See what you fail to realize is that when you try to trash talk like you trash talk, they're just words with zero power behind it. Hey look, I can make shit up too. I bet back in the day you used to belong to Barney Green since you seem to talk about him as much as possible, you know, as you talk shit about my Gilly jokes.... who you were part of....Moron. But anyway I bet you used to be part of Barney Green and he used to use you to fuck tranny corpses because that's the only way he could get laid. I bet you liked that dead pussy didn't you, sick fuck.

Calix shrugs his shoulders.

And those last couple sentences is exactly what listening to you is like. Just a bunch of random shit thrown together with no proof, no substance, and it makes no impact. That's cool though because you're a dick right? Try again dumbfuck, there have been plenty of dicks in the XWF before you and we didn't lower the bar for them. Oh but I guess we should for you right? Of course we should since YOU'RE lazy and YOU'RE uninterested. Or perhaps deep down it's you that's the pussy since you want us to let you off of the hook because of what you are. What's next? When you have your match with Maverick, he's not allowed to hit you because you're a dick. Man the fuck up and stop trying to paint me as something that you're PROVING yourself to be.

So here's an idea for you little guy, how about you come back when you can actually do some damage fighting me and can step to me with some trash talk that isn't based on your vivid imagination but that's it. Trash my Gilly jokes all you like but the fact is that you belonged to that fat fuck and you'll always be linked to him. Got any proof I fuck Ihop hookers? Yeah, I didn't think so, yet you cling to that like it's the greatest thing anybody has ever said. Why? Because it's all you got so you have to be your own hype man in order to make it seem like you're actually worth a damn. You know who does that? Dicks and people who hover around a 50% winning percentage.

Dick of Gilly uses his massively sick infectious good to propel himself and pin the champ again.

Calix can't seem to wriggle out from underneath the SUPER DICK!

1



2




3!

Winner and NEW Federweight champion: Gilly's SUPER DICK!