The Pest is sitting his doctor's office, waiting for the doctor to come in. The Pest is bored, and yet he waits. The Pest stirs, his foot taps in anticipation. He checks his watch, the doctor is five minutes late. He sits and waits, still. Then, the door opens. The Doctor comes in. He walks over and has a seat across from Pest. He pulls out a notepad and looks at the Pest.

Doctor:James, we need to speak about something.

Pest:Then speak.

Doctor:Do you find children sexually attractive?

Pest:Not children so much as teenage girls. Eighteen is too old for me.

Doctor:That's another issue all together. One we'll discuss later. For now, I've been doing some research into you, since you're a public figure and all. I have a couple of questions about you.

Pest:And what are they?

Doctor:Is your real name even James Stevens?

Pest:No. It is not. I use a fake name to get by. I cannot recall my real name at the current moment. I have not used it in forever.

Doctor:Did you really force a man to eat the meat from his dead wife's bones? After blinding him?

Pest:I did. I do not regret that decision.

Doctor:And you killed the mother of your unborn child?

Pest:Only one of the mothers of my children. The other died in birth. She died so my daughter could live. May I ask you a question?

Doctor:Yes.

Pest:You watched the promo from my opponent, Hysteria, did you not?

Doctor:I did.

Pest:I see. Then you should know a few things. One, I was involved in Vietnam in 1973. I stayed until 1975 when the South lost. We did not all leave when Nixon pulled out. A few small units stayed around for peace keeping. Much like how there are still troops in Iraq despite that war being over as well. I am not quite sixty, I turn sixty this December. I do not understand where Hysteria gets the notions he does. The man is mad, and not in the sense of being useful in his madness.

Doctor:I see. And what about his claims of you having Alzheimer's?

Pest:You are the medical professional. Do I have Alzheimer's?

Doctor:I don't believe so. I've yet to see evidence of this.

Pest:Good. Now, allow me to continue my questions. What do you call a man who dons a mask and runs around stabbing people with forks?

Doctor:Probably deranged, dangerous, and exhibiting symptoms of deep mental issues.

Pest:And he is leading a church. A church made up of equally unstable fools. A man who likes to threaten to disembowel as if we were children on the playground. A man who believes he is a god, they literally worship this man, a man who likes to threaten to rape the innocent. He has gone and actually raped people on camera, and brags about it. There is also a man who hides behind a cat mask, and speaks as if he is a cat. Oh, I should not begin on Ghost Tank. Ghost Tank, the man who believes people fear him, yet he hides behind his masquerade of respect, which impedes him from doing anything worth a damn. This is why Ghost Tank will not speak on this match, and make no appearances at the event. No, these people are delusional, Doctor.

Doctor:Well, I don't know them. But the first man you described also sounds as if he has a Messiah Complex. Perhaps you shouldn't be judging people who rape, seeing as you how you have a fetish for little girls.

Pest:I thought Doctor's did not pass judgment.

Doctor:Yes, we normally don't. But, you're a kid rapist.

Pest:That may be, but you are not to judge. You are here to help.

Doctor:Do you want help?

Pest:For the ghosts I am seeing, yes. For the girls. No.

Doctor:See? Can't help what doesn't want help.

Pest:Fine.

Doctor:So, are you enacting a sexual fantasy when you do these things?

Pest:Oh, yes. Absolutely. I am acting out sexual fantasies when I have sex with those girls. Why would I not be acting up sexual fantasies when I have sex with people I am sexually attracted to? Do you not enjoy the thought of ravaging your wife when you violate her?

Doctor:Yes.

Pest:And that blonde you have working the front desk? Do you not think of her taut young body in her little skirt all day before you push your unfaithful prick into her on this sofa at the end of the day? Does she let you stick it in her ass if you tell her you love her? Promise to leave your wife for her in exchange for that privilege?

Doctor:What makes you assume I'm sleeping with her?

Pest:There is a condom stuck to your shoe, and you were breathing heavily when I came in. I also noticed a new necklace on her, and that top was rather low cut. Do not insult me by pretending you are not sleeping with her. Now, does it make sense for someone to not act upon sexual fantasies when they are having sex?

Doctor:No. And you're not wrong about Christine. Except, she doesn't want me to leave my wife. She's happy with the status quo.

Pest:Now, do you wish to speak on the nature of the claims that I am a child who fails to understand the ramifications of my actions?

Doctor:No. I think you fully understand them, but I think you're being haunted by the life you lead, and wish you had done things differently.

Pest:Is that so? You believe I would change things?

Doctor:Yes. I believe you would.

Pest:No. I would not.

Doctor:Then why are you here?

Pest:Because I am seeing ghosts from someone I did not murder. I am having flashbacks to the war. I start my car, and I hear the sounds of gunfire. I shower, and feel the rains of a Vietnamese summer. I have flashbacks to the fear of a Tropical Storm hitting us. I wake up in the middle of the night clawing at the scar on my chest. I feel as if I was back in Okinawa, recovering from the surgery.

Doctor:And none of this has anything to do with regret for the girls you've violated? The lives you've ruined? The lives you've ended?

Pest:No. I do no regret those things. I entertain the thought of going after people again. I am the God of Emptiness, and I do not feel sympathy. Nor do I feel sorrow for the things I have done.

Doctor:Then I cannot help you. I'm sorry, but you need to leave then.

The Pest gets to his feet and approaches the doctor. He puts his hands on the chair's arm rests on both sides. He lowers his face to meet the gaze of the Doctor, and sniffs the air. He leans in close, and licks the side of the Doctor's ear. A shiver runs down the doctor's spine.

Pest:Do not dismiss me as if I was some common fly. I have approached you, and I will be the one to dismiss this situation. I will remove myself from here, and I will handle these issues on my own. You are not the man to help me, then. And do not attempt to contact the police. I am off the grid. Nothing I have provided you is accurate. No information you have on me is correct. If you ran my address and name they would fail to match. The social security number you have belongs to a man who died in Vietnam.

Doctor:Are you attempting to threaten me?

Pest:No. I am reminding you of the futility of that plan. It is your best interest to forget me. Go home, and forget me. If you can. However, if you feel as if you think it is a good idea to come for me, go and do some more research on me given what you know. See if that is what you wish to contend with. And that, Doctor, is a threat. A valid threat. A threat you can count on.

The Pest releases the chair, and stands upright. He removes himself from the room. The scowl upon his face has removed itself and replaced itself with a scornful smirk. He walks past the front desk where Christine is sitting. She is smiling, and speaking to a client. She gestures for the client to go to the sitting area and stops The Pest.

Christine:Hey, wait.

The Pest stops and turns to face Christine. She shoots him a flirty smile. He steps towards her. The scent of her perfume fills the air. The Pest enjoys the smell. He leans on the desk and lowers himself to her.

Pest:Hello, Christine.

Christine:So, how was your session?

Pest:Enlightening. I believe I am nearly cured. I do not believe I will be coming back.

Christine:Oh, boo. Well, how about I give you my number so you can call me if you ever change your mind?

Pest:Christine, how old are you?

Christine:Nineteen. Why?

Pest:I think it is for the best if you and I do not do this. Do not pursue me. Do not attempt to seduce me. It is better for you if I do not slide myself into you. There will be pleasure for you, believe me when I say that, but at the end I will ruin you. You will crave no other man, and when you do lay with another, they will fail to measure up to me. You will be left with a sense of wanting for the entirety of your life. I will ruin the image of love for you, and I will ruin the notion of casual sex for you. You will be disgusted at the things I show you, and yet you will crave more. You will be dragged to a world of sickness and misery. I will force you to harm yourself, and degrade yourself. You will truly hate yourself when you look back on the things we do. And yet, I will move on and think of you with nothing but apathy in my life. You will mean nothing to me. Nothing but a number. I will most likely not even find pleasure in your loins, which will force me to do more twister and darker things to you. You will most likely meet your end at the end of a rope. Consider this a warning.

Christine:I'm still game. Here's my number.

She hands the Pest a piece of paper, and he begins to turn and leave again. As he approaches the door he stops and turns to face Christine one last time. She has an adorable grin on her face. It appears as if she has either found out there is a Santa, or has won the lottery.

Pest:Oh, and Christine, one final thing. I would advise you to cease your relations with the Doctor. He is not going to be able to fulfill those lustful little thoughts of yours. Nor will the man ever truly love you the way you wish he would. The man, as it were, has been emptied. He has been changed. I do not suppose that he will ever be the same.

Christine:Did you sleep with him? Is that why? Are you gay?

Pest:No, Christine. I am not a homosexual, and I did not sleep with him. But I did allow him to see a glimpse of what I am truly capable of. Something that you will get as well, if only a deeper gaze, should you truly choose to continue this.

Before she can answer the Pest turns and leaves the building. The girl is sitting at her desk, and goes speechless. The Doctor comes out of his office, and looks at Christine.

Christine:I don't think we should see each other like that anymore.

Doctor:I think that's for the best.