The camera fades into the Bankers Life Fieldhouse as pyrotechnics explode from the ramp, the crowd roars as the camera pans past them. This is Wednesday Night Warfare! The show were anything goes and Xtreme takes the helm! Eagles of Death Metal's Don't Speak echoes throughout the arena.
The director of talent management and co-GM of Warfare makes walks onto the ramp, wearing a sharp suit he looks smiling to the crowd, he raises the microphone in his hand to his mouth as his music dies down.
"Ladies and gentleman, my name is Matthew Oaktree and welcome to Wednesday Night Warfare!"
The crowd roars and cheers.
"Now before we start, my fellow General Managers and I have a very special announcement. Ladies and gentlemen, Gabrielle House and Ozymandias!"
King of Kings plays as Gabrielle House and Ozymandias walk out from the back and join Matthew Oaktree on the ramp, House holding something under a black sheet. Oaktree hands the microphone to Ozymandias.
"Good evening, now as we all saw on Monday Night Madness. We witnessed the Hart Championship be reinstated. A respectable title with a long history and the XWF is known for it's respectable titles, the Universal, the X-Treme, the Television title, even the US and European titles. All well known belts with a long list of talented wrestlers attached to them, but since Warfare is the future it seems only fitting we pave the way. While other titles stay in the past, Warfare's new title will be brand new."
Ozymandias and Oaktree look to House, who rips off the black sheet and holds the new Warfare title in the air.
"This is our new title, the Intercontinental Championship! A belt for Warfare's true champions.And on February 25th the inaugural Intercontinental Champion will be crowned. So to all those who opted in to that show Good Luck. To those who did not, maybe next time."
The crowd cheers once more and Ozymandias hands the microphone back to Oaktree.
"Now, I'm a smart man, I know what you people paid to see. You want to see blood?"
The crowd roars again.
"Well you will see some blood! You want to see guts!? You will see guts! You want weapons!? You will get weapons! You want to see a man fight tooth and nail for his very life!? You will see what you fucking paid for!"
The crowds erupts in applause and excitement.
"Now, Warfare ain't no pussies like Madness, a show full of guys that will pass out from a shaving cut. We have the badasses on this goddamn show. Men and women willing to risk life and limb for your entertainment, shit, this is the only place on Earth you will see Peter Gilmour be killed by a video game character. So, without further ado, let the bloodbath, commence!"
The three GMs waves to the crowd as Ozymandias' music kicks up again, he goes into the back as the crowd cheers.
Malik Jefferson
- vs -
Grayson Stinger Street Fight
Grayson Stinger walks out of the Pizza Hut on East Washington. He sees Malik, and a referee. The ref is holding a tire iron for some reason, and bangs it on a trash can, causing the match to start. Grayson rushes towards Malik, and throws his pizza in Malik's face. Malik removes the pizza only to be hit with a jumping Superman punch as soon as he can see again. Jefferson stumbles back, and topples over a small child playing in the street. Stinger, being an asshole, walks over and kicks Jefferson, then kicks the kid. Jefferson feels around the ground, and finds a brick. He pops to his feet and smacks Stinger across the face with it. Stinger falls back into a nearby parked car.
Stinger pushes himself up off the car, only to be hit in the face with a brick again. Grayson gets up, and another brick comes his way. He duck, and throws a jab to the ribs of Jefferson. Malik stumbles back, and Grayson makes a dash. He finds a pipe, and charges Malik. Malik dodges, and finds a pipe in the back of the car Grayson was on earlier. He picks up the brick and throws it through the windshield. The pair begin to have a pipe fight, swinging wildly. Grayson connect with Malik's ribs. Malik hits Stinger's knees. Stinger drops to one knee, and braces himself. Malik swings the pipe down and cracks Stinger's head with it. He goes down. Malik continues to beat the body of the downed Billionaire. He goes for a pin on Grayson.
1
...
2
...
NO! Some kid on the street came up and kicked Malik in the face. Malik gets to his feet and goes for the kid. This turns to be a mistake, as Stinger gets to his feet wobbily, and picks up the brick he had been hit with earlier. It whizzes past Malik, and hits a window. Malik turns around in time to be caught with a Missile drop kick from Grayson. Malik goes back and lands on a trash can. Stinger rushes over and slams another trashcan on top of Malik. He raises it, and drops it again. And Again. Stinger slams the trash can down for the fourth time, but is met with a brick to the small of his back from a random passerby. He goes down, and the random urchin helps Malik to his feet. He makes some gesture, and stomps on Stinger before leaving. Malik walks into a nearby Ally and comes out holding an aluminum baseball bat. He walks over and begins to bash Stinger in the torso with it. The load ping noise resonates throughout the area as people come over and begin to watch.
The crowd start cheering for Malik as he bashes Grayson. Each blow elicits a groan from Grayson. Stinger attempts to get to his feet, only to take a bat to the head. His head is bleeding, and he's having trouble seeing. Malik throws the bat down, and mounts Stinger. He begins to throw punches to Stinger's face. Jefferson takes a second to pause, and Stinger spits blood in his attacker's face. Malik recoils in disgust at this. Grayson takes the lid from the nearby trash can and brings it to meet Malik's head, which sends the man to the ground. Stinger gets to his feet, and lifts Malik. He pulls Malik to the Pizza Hut and throws Malik through the front window. He climbs through the broken window, and lifts Jefferson to his feet. The Billionaire lifts Jefferson to his feet and slams his face onto the front counter. Waitresses and guests scream in horror as Grayson repeatedly slams the face of his former attacker on the counter. Jefferson throws an elbow into Stinger. Stinger releases his grip, and Malik drags the man into the kitchen, and throws a pot of boiling water into Stinger's face. Stinger recovers and takes a hot pizza pan and begins to bash Malik's torso with it. The head Chef comes out and screams at them. Malik responds by throwing a Pizza Cutter at the man's leg. The Chef hobbles away.
Stinger raises the pizza pan for another swing but Malik telegraphs it and kicks it out of Grayson's hand. Malik headbutts Stinger and grabs him, shoving his head into the a nearby sink filled with dirty water and appliances, Stinger's body struggles but Malik holds his head down in the murky water until the bubbles stop.
Winner by KO Malik Jefferson!
Malik releases Stinger's head and walks away, but not before enjoying a delicious slice of Pizza Hut pizza.
Tommy Gunn
- vs -
Steve Stajan Bar Room Brawl
The scene is Kilros Bar and Grill, a local watering hole near the Bankers Life Fieldhouse. Inside the bar are XWF newcomer Steve Stajan, Heyman Alliance Resident Asshole Tommy Gunn and an official XWF referee. The ref looks over and some random guy taps a Jamesons bottle with a big metal spoon signifying the beginning of the match.
Gunn immediately reaches over and grabs the cue ball off the nearby pool table and wings it at Steve Stajan hitting him right in his left eye. Stajan grabs his eye which gives Gunn the opening to charge at him...
SPEAR!!!
Right into the jukebox. Sparks fly everywhere as the song that had been playing "Midnight Train To Georgia" by Gladys Knight and the Pips comes to an undignified end.
Gunn get's up and looks around the bar for the next weapon to grab. He saunters over to a table and picks up one of the chairs. He turns around to smash it over Steve Stajan but surprisingly Stajan is already up and waiting for Gunn. Stejan kicks Gunns in the midsection and then rips the chair out of the Ex Sniper's hands...
CRACK!!!
The chair explodes into a million pieces while Gunn stammers slightly dazed and possibly confused. Stajan wastes no time and immediately follows up with a headbutt to Gunn that busts him open above the right eye. Gunn stumbles back a little bit but Stajan doesn't let the man fall down instead he pulls Gunn in and bodyslams his opponent through a near by table.
Stajan kneels down for the pin...
1...
2...
Kick out!!
Gunn kicks out and Stajan rolls off his opponent but doesn't go too far.
Suddenly the lights in the bar go out, and when they come back on, Mastermind is seen standing over Tommy, who is down and out. He had just hit Tommy with a steel chair.
Mastermind grabs a beer and drinks it. Then he pours the remainder of it over Tommy, and looks at Sajan. He starts walking away.
He motions to Sajan, and leaves.
Sajan grabs Gunn by the back of the head and pulls him up to his feet. Again Stejan pulls Gunn in, this time setting him up for a front suplex but Gunn hooks the leg and blocks the move. Stajan tries again and again Gunn hooks the leg. Gunn starts nailing Stajan with a volley of kidney shots the third of which is enough to separate the two but only for a moment as Gunn quickly moves in and takes Stajan out with a running clothesline.
Gunn climbs on top of Stajan and with Stajan's arms pinned down Gunn starts whaling away on Stajan's face with vicious mounted punches.
Meanwhile The Pest walks into the bar. He casually walks behind the bar as Tommy is busy bashing Stajan's face open. He calmly pours a mug of the strongest beer they have. Minimal head. Good pour. He looks at it, sniffs it, and then walks over to the pair of brawlers. He taps Tommy on the shoulder, who stops what he is doing, gets up and turns to face him. Pest makes a gesture, and Tommy steps back. The Pest smashes the mug on the face of Steven before tipping his hat to Tommy, and turning to leave.
Gunn looks around for a bit not sure what the fuck Pest was doing there but sensing that the freaky fucker did him an uneeded favor Gunn decides to not let up. He pulls Stajan up by his neck and then pulls him in close and then ....
CRASH!!!!!!!!!
Gunn just German Suplex Steve Stajan into the bar's backdrop. Glass from both the backdrop and the bottles of alcohol that were resting there is now all over the place. Gunn then walks over to the bar, grabs a bottle of Grey Goose, bites off the top and starts pouring its contents out on the bar. He then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a lighter....
SWOOOOOSHHHHH!!!!
The top of the bar instantly ignites. Gunn pulls Stajan up, grabs him by the back of his head and attempts to smash Stajan's head into the bar but Stajan reaches out with his foot and using a plank of wood underneath the bar for leverage he blocks Gunn's attempted move. Gunn tries it again. Again it's blocked. Gunn tries a third time except this time he kicks Stajan's leg out and with a swift motion slams Stajan's head into the bar, leaving it there for a quick second, allowing the flames to sear the side of Stajan's face.
Stajan screams out in pain but Gunn does not relent. Not until the ref gets in there and forces Gunn to break it up. Gunn spins around and gets right up in the refs grill. Gunn grabs Stajan by the waist and tosses him over the bar. Gunn then casually walks around the bar and grabs Stajan who is on his knees grabbing at his half burnt off face. Gunn pulls Stajan over towards the pool table. He pulls Stajan up to his feet and before you known it powerbombs Stajan through the pool table breaking it in half.
Gunn pushes one side of the pool table away and hooks Stajan's leg for the pin.
1...
2...
3!!!
Winner - Tommy Gunn
Backstage in the temporary office for the Warfare General Managers, Gabrielle House sits on a small couch looking at the new Intercontinental Championship, Ozymandias sits behind a desk, writing something important probably, Matthew Oaktree walks into the office with an open bottle of beer.
"Hey, show's looking pretty damn good right?"
"Meh, last weeks was better."
"Because you ran it right?"
"Well, yes."
"Ha, at least this week didn't kick off with a cancelled match."
"Not my fault the 'talent' doesn't want to do their damn jobs."
"Hence why you're not the Director of Talent Management."
House chuckles as Oaktree takes another swig of his beer. Ozymandias speaks up.
"When you two are done, I need some help with the next Warfare."
"Why's that chief?"
"This show is going to be a milestone for us."
House and Oaktree shoot a look at each other and go to Ozymandias' desk, the footage fades to black.
John Ross
- vs -
Ricky Desmond X-Treme Rules
Money hits the ring. Ricky strolls out onto the stage and he looks across the thousands of fans. He has a eerie smirk on his face, and he punches his fists together as he always does. He strides down the ramp, briskly ignoring the fans as he does so. Ricky slowly climbs the steel steps and brushes his feet on the ring apron before climbing over the middle rope and raising his right arm into the air. The music comes to an end as he jogs on the spot in preparation.
After Save My Soul plays for several seconds, J.R. emerges from backstage clad in leather pants and a leather vest, topped with a black stetson. Accompanied by a girl under each arm. They escort him to the ring and one takes his hat. He stays emotionless as the other seductively removes his vest.
Both Desmond and Ross circle around one another, and then at once, both step up to the middle of the ring and lock-up, Ross, being the more technically-sound of the two, is able to quickly secure Desmond in a side head-lock, and before Desmond can begin to fight out of it, Ross has already lifted him up, and slammed him down, spine-first with a back-suplex! Ross is straight back up to his feet, and is now savagely hitting Desmond with boot after boot into the mid-section, one more big stomp, and Desmond is sitting up, clutching onto his gut in agony… Ross is running toward ringside, and is rebounding off the ring ropes, he is charging back over to Desmond… and another big boot, this one slamming right off the face! Ross going for the early pinfall!
ON-NO! That isn’t enough to put Desmond down!
Ross is already back up to his feet, and is looking down upon Desmond, he has a slight smirk on his face, with a cold look in his eye, as he is slowly picking up Desmond… he’s whipping Desmond over to the turnbuckle corner, and now he’s charging right after him…
Desmond rebounded off the turnbuckle padding, and came back with a crossbody! Now Desmond stood up, with Ross slowly staggering up, Desmond went for a quick kick to the gut, it is caught by Ross! But Desmond swung his other foot up… ENZIGURI! His foot cracked right off the temple, and now Desmond backed up a bit, before charging straight up to Ross!
Spinning Heel Kick! And now Ross is slumped right into the turnbuckle corner, and now Desmond is unloading on him! Punch after punch, hammering away at the head and body of Ross… Ross is trying to cover up the best he can, but Desmond is piling on the pressure, and eventually, Ross is left in a seated position, with the turnbuckle behind him… Desmond turned away from him for a moment, and looked out to the crowd, a cocky grin on his face, but right when he turned out…
CRASH! The sound of shattering glass is heard!
Ross just slammed a bourbon bottle over the head of Desmond! Where did he get that from?
Desmond was bleeding right from the top of the forehead, blood is pouring down all over him, his face has turned into a crimson-mask! Ross drops down on top of him, going for the cover!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-NO! The bloodied Desmond kicked out! Ross looked shocked!
Ross slowly rolled out to ringside, and looked underneath the ring, he had an evil look in his eye, as he pulled out a small bag from underneath the ring, he shoved the apron back down, and slid back into the ring, and now… he’s pouring out the contents from the small bag into the ring…
THUMBTACKS!
Ross is spreading the thumbtacks out across the middle of the ring, Desmond is still barely responding, as he lies in a puddle of his own blood, Ross walked over to Desmond, picked him up, and now he hooked him from behind… he’s going for a Russian-leg sweep on the tacks!
Desmond isn’t about to let that happen! An elbow to the gut of Ross, and another one! Ross has let go of Desmond, and now…
Desmond is lifting him up, he has Ross high up in the air…
PUMP-HANDLE SLAM ON THE TACKS!
The tacks dug themselves right into Ross’s back, a look of shocked came over him, his mouth wide open, Desmond desperately rolled Ross over and pinned him!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-NO! Kickout by Ross! Both men have adrenaline rushing through them now!
Now it was Desmond’s turn to roll out the ring, he breathed heavily, and wiped a hand over his face, removing some of the blood and sweat that now coated his face, he looked underneath the ring… and pulled out a table! Desmond had a table in hand, and now he’s putting it into the ring, he’s sliding back in slowly, still looking a bit dazed… he’s setting up the table in the corner! Ross has only just gotten back up to his feet, and Desmond is right back over to Ross, both men are standing in the centre of the ring…
A punch from Ross! Desmond is staggering backward.
Another punch from Ross! Desmond is looking stunned!
And now… SUPLEX from Ross to Desmond! Some of the remaining thumbtacks on the ground embed themselves into Desmond! Ross isn’t looking for the cover, he has Desmond up… he has him up once more…. he’s dragging him over toward the table that is leaning against the corner, Ross is laying Desmond down on the table, and he’s walking backward… and now he’s charging right at Desmond, who is leaning right against the table… Ross is slinging his arm out, looking to clothesline him right through the table…!
NO!
Caught by Desmond!
DEMOLITION THROUGH THE TABLE! (Sit-Out Spine Buster!)
Desmond with a Spine Buster through the table, and now both men were lying in the wreckage…. neither man is stirring at first, but now…
Desmond is slowly coming to life, he’s crawling out of the wreckage of the table, and now he’s pulling Ross along with him, Desmond falls atop of Ross, barely hooking the leg…!
ONE!
TWO!
THR-NOOOOOO! Kick out at 2.9 by Ross!
Desmond is shocked, he can’t believe it! He’s slowly pulling himself up to his feet, and now he’s walking backward, looking at Ross who is still grounded, he’s setting up for it… YES! He’s setting up for the Million Dollar Bill (Clothesline From Hell!), Ross is stirring, he’s up to a knee… now he’s on both feet, Desmond has flung out his arm, this is going to land with an impact!
Ross moved out of the way! Now he was right behind Desmond, who had missed wildly…
BACKSTABBER BY ROSS! Ross rolls himself atop of Desmond, looking for the cover…
ONE!
TWO!
THR-NOT QUITE! Desmond powered out again!
Both men are laid out on the canvas, neither man has stirred at this point, what a crazy match thus far!
Wait a second. What's going on? Is that John Ross's brother? It is. It's Dallas Zade. What the hell is he doing here?
Zade who had been seated in the front row hops the guardrail. He attempts to climb into the ring but two XWF Security Guards swarm the man. Each guard grabbing one of the man's arms. Dallas Zade stands still for a second contemplating his next move. As he does this the referee sees what's going on and turns his attention to the fray outside the ring.
Zade suddenly lunges backwards sending himself and the two guards crashing into the steel barricade. Both guards are down and they don't appear to be getting up. Dallas then stands up, dusts himself off and starts to calmly ascend the ring steps as both John Ross and Ricky Desmond start to stir.
The ref walks over towards the corner and cuts the man off refusing to let him into the ring. As he does this Ross and Desmond both get to their feet. Both men look over towards the corner trying to figure out what is going on. As Ricky Desmond continues to stare at the intruder John Ross reaches into his pants and pulls out a small empty bourbon bottle. With Desmond still fixated on the man in the corner J.R swings the bottle as hard as he can, cracking it over the back of Desmond's head. Desmond stumbles forward a step and thats when J.R nails him with Pay Dirt(Cross Rhodes.)
Zade the points towards the center of the ring indicating that the ref might want to start doing his job. The ref quickly spins around just as J.R makes the pin. Zade begins backing down the steps and as he does so the ref slides into position.
One!!!
Two!!!!
Three!!!
The ref raises John Ross' hand in victory just as his brother Dallas Zade climbs into the ring. The two exchange a handshake and then Dallas raises his brother's arm as the crowd starts to rain down a chorus of boos at the two men.
Winner - John Ross
Desmond can’t believe it! He’s stunned by the defeat at the hands of fellow businessman and debutant, John Ross!
Ross begins to celebrate, raising his arms into the air.
What’s this though!?
Desmond from behind! He spins Ross around, kicks him in the gut, and plants him with a signature Fisherman’s suplex!!
He’s not done there though, Ricky lifts John Ross up to his feet and throws him head first into the turnbuckle before running off the opposite ropes!
MILLION DOLLAR BILL!!! (Clothesline from Hell)
Ross is broken in half!
Desmond then grabs Ross by the leg and locks in Business First (Single Legged Boston Crab)
“There’s only one businessman in this company!” Desmond roars.
Eventually officials sprint down and Desmond is forced to break the hold. He takes money out from his wrestling tights and throws it down on the mat.
“Why don’t you try and get your own god damn company back ass hole!”
Pink Floyd - Money hits the ring as Desmond heads to the back, still enraged by his defeat.
Cole Jackson and Maverick
- vs -
Iris Oppenheimer and Essence Tornado Tag Team Rules
Cole Jackson and Maverick stand in the ring wearing red shirts, as the fans sing.
"YOU'RE AS COLE AS ICE! WILLING TO SACRIFICE!"
The music fills the arena as Essence enters looking around. She walks down the ramp and crawls underneath the ropes. She jumps to her feet and smiles an adorable smile at the audience as she climbs the buckle and pumps her arms up and down!
"Nine in the Afternoon" by Panic! at the Disco begins to play and Iris Oppenheimer bounces down to the ring. Yes, bounces. As in so wired up with enthusiasm, she can't help but jump up and down on her way to the ring.
The four competitors meet in the center of the ring. Maverick looks and points with his thumb at the two ladies and chuckles a moment before Essence and Iris both hit their opponents with simultaneous round house kicks! Maverick and Jackson both smack the back of their heads off the ground. Essence picks up Jackson and Irish-whips him into the corner as Iris follows closely behind him, springs off of the second rope and drop kicks him in the head! She got so much air on the move that it was more of a stomp on the head rather than a dropkick. Jackson falls forward to the mat and lays motionless. Maverick was hiding out in the corner and runs up behind Essence and grapples her from behind. She shifts her weight and manages to arm drag Maverick down from the hold. Iris follows up with a kick to Maverick's head which sends spit flying out of his mouth and out of the ring. Iris and Essence pick up both of their opponents and Irish-whips them into the ropes together. They follow up with double flying forearms as Maverick and Jackson spring off the ropes! Jackson takes the blunt of it and falls through the middle rope to the outside!
Essence goes after Maverick as Iris runs back to spring off of the opposite ropes and hits Jackson with a big baseball slide as he gets to his feet sending him back stepping up the ramp and onto his back! Essence gets Maverick to his feet and hits several punches and kicks before Maverick blocks one and swings back! Essence parries the blow and gets behind Maverick and grapples him. She tries twice to lift him, but Maverick manages to counter with a few elbows to the face. He breaks the grapple and as he turns around is met with a missile dropkick from Iris who was waiting on the top rope! Maverick falls backwards and lies on the mat. Iris runs back up to the top turnbuckle and flies off with a flying senton that hits it's mark! Maverick clenches his entire body as the blow stops his breathing for a moment or two!
Cole Jackson has made it back into the ring, but as he goes for Iris, Essence stops him and takes him down with a big leg scissor! Jackson flops to the mat and now Essence and Iris stand over their two downed opponents with ease.
Suddenly Eagles of Death Metal's Don't Speak starts to sound through the arena. Matthew Oaktree steps onto the ramp with a microphone in hand, his music dies down and he raises the mic to his mouth.
"Okay I think that's enough. Iris, Essence. Well done on this piss easy victory, you put in the work and effort and dominated the competition. Cole and Iceman on the other hand, you two jackasses did sweet F A. And I don't like it when the 'talent' doesn't do their jobs, and I will not tolerate it. These fans will not tolerate it. Quite frankly, I think your performance tonight has been absolute bullshit. So, I came up with something to teach you two and anyone else who doesn't work a lesson. Ladies, will you do me a favor and throw this dickless nobodies out of the ring."
Iris and Essence shrug and throw Cole and Maverick out of the ring.
"Thank you kindly. Butch!?"
Matthew Oaktree steps out of the way as a large, muscular bull runs out onto the ramp. It sees the redshirt wearing duo cowering on the outside, the bull kicks its hooves and charges down the ramp with it's head lowered goring the two redshirts and impaling them on it's horns. Cole and Mav cry in agony as Butch kicks freaks out, running full steam back up the ramp and out through the curtain. The crowd roars and Oaktree claps.
"Ladies and gentleman, your winners by being overall greater than their competition. Iris Oppenheimer and Essence!"
The crowd claps as Essence and Iris raise their hands in victory and Warfare fades to commercial.
The show fades back in from commercial with Herod standing in the ring.
The opening instrumental of GOAT echoes around the arena as smoke slowly rises from the metal floor. Goat Face Killa makes his way from the back with a Goat on a leash of whom he is feeding. He slaps a bunch of hands walking down the ramp, before picking up the Goat and handing it to a specialist next to the ring bearer before sliding into the ring and raising to arms in the air to a cheer from the crowd. He retreats to his corner where he does stretches.
The lights go out in the arena followed by an eerie red glow. Smoke rises from the entrance way and the Doctor emerges from it. He stands at the top of the ramp and looks out among the crowd, then slowly begins walking towards the ring. The Doctor climbs the ring steps and into the ring, he stands on the second turnbuckle and holds his arms into the air as the lights flash back on.
The three men glare at each other in the ring, as Goat Face starts to kicks his heels on the mat like he's ready to ram someone like an aggravated goat. The crowd begins to sound.
GFK stops kicking at the mat and looks crazy eyed at the fans.
"I AM A MAN!"
The ref singles the bell and Goat Face turns quickly to Herod opposite him and charges full speed hitting Herod with a leaping headbutt! Herod goes down like a sack of shit and rolls straight out of the ring, GFK lying on the mat starts to do push ups and rolls to his feet, pointing at the good Doctor who stares quizzically at the half man, half goat. GFK starts to circle D'Ville trying to find an opening, Killah rushes the champ and leaps with a cross body, but D'Ville catches him and sends him straight into a backbreaker. Goat Face holds his back in pain on the mat, D'Ville raises his knees and drops it GFK's head.
Marcus Phlin rolls on the mat in pain, holding where his horns should be in pain. D'Ville starts to walk over to Goat Face but out of nowhere Herod runs into the ring with a steel chair high over his head, but Doc sees this and gives a stiff kick to Herod's gut! Herod folds in on himself, dropping the chair at his feet and D'Vile garbs him and drives him into the steel chair with a DDT!
Herod is out cold on the mat, D'Ville turns his attention back to GFK who is getting to his man hooves. D'Ville pushes Herod's lifeless body off the chair and grabs the steel chair firmly, the doctor moves to Goat Face and swings the chair into his face! GFK wobbles on his feet looking cross eyed and dazed before falling to the ground like a myotonic goat (fainting goat). D'Ville throws the chair to his side and goes for the pin on GFK but he's pulled away by Herod who spins Louis around and goes for a lariat, but the good doctor telegraphs it and ducks under Herod's arm. D'Ville grabs Herod from behind and throws him with a beautiful German Suplex! Herod lands on the back of his neck and is flung out of the ring! D'Ville gets to his feet and goes to Goat Face Killah, but GFK kips up! He's bruning with anger and energy screaming at the doctor while fist pumping!
"Female goats are called 'does'. Male goats are called 'bucks'. Young goats are called 'kids."
D'Ville looks confused and intrigued at this sudden burst of energy and trivia, but no time to dawdle on that as GFK throws a mighty headbutt against D'Ville! And another! And another! D'Ville falls to the mat, Killah runs to the ropes while spouting more trivia.
"The age of a goat can be determined by its teeth!"
D'Ville is slowly getting to his feet as GFK rushes back and hits a clothesline! D'Ville is knocked down hard but gets to his feet again as GFK rebounds off the ropes once more.
"The most common domestic breeds are the Angora, Cashmere, French-Alpine, Nubian, Saanen and Toggenburg!"
Another clothesline from GFK sends D'Ville to the mat once more! What the fuck is going on!? Phlin continues to sprint across the mat and into the ropes, D'Ville furious springs to life with a clothesline of his own, but GFK ducks and goes behind D'Ville. A belly to back suplex! D'Ville is riving on the ground in pain, Goat Face gets to his feet and celebrates to a roaring crowd, he turns to the fallen doctor.
"Coffee was first discovered when herders noticed the goats acting energetic after nibbling on coffee beans. Bitch!"
GFK rushes over to the doctor and goes for the cover.
1
...
2
....
THRE-NO! Doctor Louis D'Ville manages to kick out! Goat Face Killah can't believe it either! He slaps at the mat and grabs D'Ville bringing him to his feet, GFK hits a European uppercut on D'Ville, knocking him back briefly and then throwing him into the corner. Goat Face breathes heavily and gets into a sprinter's start. But Herod from out of nowhere proves his still in this match! Hitting GFK with a surprise bulldog! Killah gets to his feet quickly as Herod throws a mighty punch but GFK falls to his knees GOATCOCK! GOATCOCK! GOATCOCK! GFK hits the disastrous dick punk into Herod's package! Herod falls to the floor as Goat Face Killah roars in victory and moves in super slow motion, looking slowly at D'Ville who is confused to say the leats now out of his corner. I think it's safe to say, this is one of the stranger days in the XWF. D'Ville rushes over to Killah and raises his leg to boot him in the face. BUT HE'S CAUGHT BY THE MIGHTY GOATCOCK INSTEAD! The slow moving Phlin hit the Goatcock on D'Ville! Louis falls the mat in pain as GFK continues his slow motion victory roar and stance, but D'Ville punches GFK in the his future Kids! Smart move from the doctor. GFK roar of triumph turns into one of agony as he falls backwards through the ropes and onto the outside.
The champ takes this moment to catch his breath as he gets to his feet in the ring, GFK and Herod on the outside. Goat Face makes sure Herod is down for the count and goes under the ring, digging out what he can find and throwing it into the ring. Chairs, kendo stick, a trash can and the doctor's favourite toy, a stun baton. D'Ville quickly grabs the baton and hides it behind his back as he continues to catch his breath, Goat Face let's out a 'YES!' as he finds what he is looking for. A bucket! Filled with goat's milk? Why do we even have that in the arena? GFK gets out from under the ring holding the bucket and looking to the crowd, he points at the fallen Herod and gestures with the bucket. The crowd roars. GFK holds up a finger and slowly turns pointing at D'Ville in the ring and the crowd roars louder than before. GFK nods and sets the bucket on the apron, he grabs Herod and tosses him into the ring before getting into the ring himself and grabbing the bucket from the apron.
D'Ville and GFK stand off, weapons littered around them. GFK holding the bucket and D'Ville hiding the stun baton behind his back. GFK motions to throw the contents onto D'Ville, but Doc kicks the bucket before he does! The goat's milk splashes onto Goat Face covering him in the white liquid, D'Ville unsheathes the stun baton and jabs it into GFK's wet body! Marcus Phlin spasms on his feet and the electricity course through his body. Looks like goat meat is back on the menu boys!
After some time of watching GFK writhe in pain, D'Ville pulls away the stun baton and GFK falls to the mat looking like a dying fly. D'Ville tosses the stun baton aside and goes to Goat Face Killah's limp body, but Herod is in the wrong place at the wrong time! Stumbling between the two! D'Ville laughs and kicks Herod in the stomach.
LOBOTOMY!!!
D'Ville transitions into a pin!
1
....
2
....
3!!!!
Winner and STILL X-Treme Champion - Doctor Louis D'Ville
The ref raises D'Ville's amr in victory as he music plays, but it''s cut short.
Wait what? That can't be...
GREGGO!
GREGGO HAS RETURNED TO THE XWF! ONE OF THE ORIGINALS FROM THE BLACK CIRCLE HAS RETURNED!
He pauses at the stage, bringing the microphone to his lips as he fondles his own ballsack.
"Mmmmm... yeah... howdeh Doc. Nice little championship you got there... Mmmm..."
He starts walking towards the ring, making strange noises.
"I mean... I prefer the little ones but... Mmmm you gotta share some a lovin' to everyone... Mmmmm..."
The Doc looks a bit creeped out as Greggo slides into the ring, staying on the floor for a bit before getting back up. He leans in to sniff the title and when D'Ville pulls away, he squeezes D'Ville's butt. Doc replies with a hard push away to Greggo, who falls over.
"Mmmm... It seems you is a needin' some a lovin' around here... Mmmm... Everyone knows that I want all and I GET ALL!"
Doc is blasted from the back of the head with Goat Face Killa's cast. He falls to one knee as Greggo fondles Doc's balls for a good thirty seconds. It appears Doc got too used to it though as when he pulls away he is hit with a GoatCock! right to the balls.
"Mmmm... Yeah... bruised and a bleedin', just how I like 'em."
Goat Face Killa and Greggo celebrate in the ring with Greggo having a little action with one of Killa's prized goats, but he doesn't care as long as Greggo treats 'em nice.
Ooc:Absolutely loved the match writing and punctuality of this. The bar room brawl is one of the best I've read in a long while. Grats on the cherry popping, Oak.
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