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Caroline O'Hara Burchill · **12-16-2014, 05:25 PM**

Sigh. The idiocy that has been displayed...

Frodo, Frodo, Frodo. You idiotic, asinine fuck.

Frodo, did you take a little too much cock up your ass and into your brain lately? Or maybe there are some left over semen from Richard clogging it up when he shot his load into you? You fucking cumdumpster brownie queen. What, are you a coprophilic? That's why you're so obsessed with having anal sex? You get off from mining for Marmite, you sick fuck?

Or, maybe you're suffering from early on set Alzheimer's disease, since you can't remember the fact that you've fisted you hand up into people's asses, and that's just fucking sad. Or, then again, your brain isn't properly functioning at its best. So,here's a little refresher for you:

Frodo, or Simon, we're not sure at this point, runs down to the ring and delivers a massive right hook right to Jill Lorder's anus. His fist barely keeps from going in. He looks at the fist, sniffs it, then punches her in the jaw before running off to the back.

Need I say more? And don't start with the "That wasn't me, that was Simon!" bullshit. You make Jessie Diaz seem like the most sane person in the world and we all know how fucked up her mind is, thinking that she's this person and that person.

Oh, cool accomplishments. How nice. But, you brought up the fact that you made it to the finals of the KOTR tournament. It's kind of pointless to point out since, well, you didn't win the tournament. What, you expect to get some kind of a congratulatory certificate and a sash that says: "You didn't become King of the Ring, but at least you made it to the finals!". What, so now being second best is the cool, hip thing to do around here now? Oh well, at least you tried! You weren't able to one-up your opponent and so you came in second place, but at least you tried! Right?

You either won the tournament or you didn't. Don't try to come up with the "but at least I..." argument just so that you can make yourself seem more viable. So, it was irrelevant for you to point that fact out to me. But hey, here's an accolade still:

[Image: fail-funny-kids-you-tried2.jpg.pagespeed...RUV3ua.jpg]

[Image: fail-funny-kids-you-tried2.jpg.pagespeed...RUV3ua.jpg]

Also, when I said that you were obsessed, I meant that you were obsessed with having sex with pretty much the entire XWF roster. I wasn't implying that you were obsessed with me. Sure, I brought up the part where you were watching me while you were fucking Sarah, but that wasn't the main basis I was trying to get at. Ignorant idiotic fucking, see what happens when you're just too eager that you pop off and try to call out "bullshit!" when you don't even fully understand what it is I was trying to say? Listen before you shoot your mouth off. As the old saying goes: A sharp mind is not a sign of a keen mind.

So please, think before you fucking speak and try to act like smart ass. If you're going to be a smart ass, you need to be smart in the first place, you fucking dumb ass cunt!

Oh, and I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but I already have an attire that I plan on wearing for our match tomorrow. It's a little less horrendous than that god-awful attire to you picked out. After all, a true Queen would never whore herself out just out of desperation for needing attention. That's also what some of the women here in the XWF need to learn as well. After all, this is wrestling, right? I'm here to claim my status and grace everyone with my presence, not whore myself out like this is the Playboy Mansion. Actually, Frodo, maybe you can keep that for yourself and wear the bunny outfit. You'll definitely win Playmate of the Year! Try not to get Hefner too excited though, one look at you in that outfit and you'll send the poor man's blood levels skyrocketing!

Oh Frodo, you willfully ignorant, temperamental fuck boy. You won't win tomorrow. It's simple as that. I will step all over you as if you are of little importance or value. I will make sure my heels really do dig themselves into you so that you can wince in pain and cry. And when you do, it will be the best picture-perfect moment ever. Breaking news: Frodo gets his ass handed to him easily and cries like a little bitch! That will be quite an amusing sight to see.

Anyways, tomorrow is actually my birthday. Nothing will bring me a smile to my face more than to see you all laid out on the ring, knocked out and barely breathing. I will make you look like a fool tomorrow night. Maybe I'll go get a cake, balloons, confetti and I can celebrate in the ring. It will be a lovely celebration.

Don't worry, I'll save you a slice. That is, if you're able to get up.

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