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Xavier Swann · **12-09-2014, 11:09 PM**

As the scene fades in, we see Stan – balding, toothless and repulsive, as always – sitting on the white leather sofa in Xavier Swann's penthouse. Sitting beside him, as far away as possible, is the stunning blonde - Sarah Myers. Her clipboard rests on her lap as she sits, long legs crossed, looking up at Xavier Swann who is pacing back and forth, stroking his jawline thoughtfully. After a brief period of silence, Swann starts shaking his right index finger at nothing in particular as he speaks.

Xavier Swann: “You know, I've been thinking.. this snowman guy, what's his name again?”

Sarah Myers sighs, then exasperatedly responds.

Sarah Myers: “Jet Frost...”

Xavier Swann: “Frosty, that's it. Thank you, Sarah. I've been thinking.. I need to teach this Frosty guy a lesson. God damn shaft-jockey obviously didn't learn anything from the beating I gave him in that tag team match last week.”

Swann looks down to see Stan smiling at him with that toothless grin, gums on display for the world to see. He stops pacing immediately.

Xavier Swann: “The hell are you smiling about, lumpy? You were about as useful as tits on a bull. Hang on, why are you still here? Haven't I fired your ass yet?”

Swann turns to Sarah as the smile disappears from Stan's face.

Xavier Swann: “Why is he still here?”

Sarah Myers: “Uhm, I.. I'm not sure, he's your personal security..”

Xavier Swann: “Tell him, he's fired!”

Sarah Myers: “He's right there, can't you tell him?”

Xavier looks downright offended.

Xavier Swann: “The hell is the point of having a personal assistant if I have to do everything myself? Tell him!”

Sarah rolls her eyes and clicks her tongue as she turns to face Stan.

Sarah Myers: “Stan, I'm sorry.. we're going to have to let you go.”

Stan looks absolutely dejected. He looks up at Xavier with a pleading look on his face. God knows what he is expecting, he just heard Swann tell Myers to pull the trigger.

Xavier Swann: “Well? You heard the woman! Get your grease filled, mutton trap out of my penthouse!”

Stan stands up, albeit with great difficulty. He begins to slowly waddle over towards the door, his enormous gut hanging over his waistline. About half way, he stops and waddles around on the spot to face Xavier and Sarah.

Stan: “Ih'm sory fer udder nite.. [puff] ..din' meen tu mes uhp.”

The expression on Xavier's face changes instantly, like a light bulb has gone off in his head. Stan is slowly making his way over to the door when Xavier holds up his hand.

Xavier Swann: “Wait. Stan, that's genius!”

Sarah looks up at Xavier in disbelief and frowns.

Sarah Myers: “Xavier, wha...”

Xavier Swann: “Ssshhh! Stan, say something else..”

Stan looks bewildered as he gazes across the room at Swann, who's eyes are like dinner plates and his face riddled with excitement.

Xavier Swann: “Well, come on, man! Say something! Anything!”

Stan: “..lyk werkin' fer yuu misstr swahn”

Xavier throws his hands into the air and laughs, before clapping his hands together.

Xavier Swann: “It's perfect! He sounds just like that snowflake guy! He even looks pretty similar.. probably not as ugly, but we can work with it! Oh, this is brilliant! Stan, you're re-hired.”

Stan's grin bursts back across his face, causing Swann to recoil.

Xavier Swann: “Ugh! Don't smile at me, gummy. Your mouth looks just like Osama Bin Wallace's did, after I kicked his teeth down his throat last Monday night!”

The smile fades from Stan's face again immediately, as he waddles back over to the sofa and sits down. With a smile on his face, Xavier starts pacing back and forth once more, thinking. He stops in front of Sarah, and turns to look at her.

Xavier Swann: “Sarah, write this down.”

Sarah Myers withdraws a pen from inside her jacket and clicks the top of it, before looking up at Xavier Swann expectantly.

Xavier Swann: “Steel chair. Ladder. Kendo Stick. Staple Gun. Pliers. Jelly Beans.”

Sarah Myers finishes scrawling and then looks up at Xavier over her clipboard, eyebrow raised.

Xavier Swann: “Got all that? Great. Now, go fetch it for me.. and be quick about it woman, I don't have all day!”

Sarah doesn't protest, she merely sighs, gets up and makes her way out of the room. Swann turns his attention to Stan, a wicked grin spread across his face.

Xavier Swann: “Now, lumpy, you and I are going to have some fun. For once, you might be able to prove your worth for something other than striking the fear of god into the caterers at the buffet.”

Stan: “Whaya' wan' me tu du?”

Xavier Swann: “Oh, you'll see.... you'll see.”

Xavier chuckles to himself as the scene fades out to black.

:: 2 Hours Later.. ::

We see Xavier Swann, dressed in full wrestling attire, standing next to Sarah Myers. He is stroking his jawline, considering something, as they both look straight ahead. Myers looks dumbfounded, almost in a state of disbelief at the sight before them. As the camera swings around, we see Stan, standing on a grass lawn. His skin is covered in what looks like brown shoe polish, and he is dressed in super tight blue and gold trunks, with ice adorning them as trim. His large gut is hanging over the front of the trunks even more more so than it normally would, as he stands there awkwardly. Xavier turns to Sarah.

Xavier Swann: “Well, what do you think?!”

Sarah Myers: “I.. uhm.. are you sure this is a good idea?”

Xavier Swann: “Sarah, please. I am insulted. This is not a good idea, it's a great idea! I'll send a message to that rastafarian snowman that he will never forget.”

Sarah merely shakes her head as Xavier Swann makes his way over to stand beside Stan, the camera turning it's focus upon both of them. Xavier pats Stan on the back as he chuckles.

Xavier Swann: “Ladies and gentlemen, let me start of by saying... you're welcome. Last week on Madness, I finally gave meaning to your pathetic, mundane lives. I gave you a reason to get off your fat asses and switch on your second-hand television sets. I gave you something to admire.. something to adorn, as you all sat there stuffing your fat faces with doughnuts and grease-filled chicken wings. I, Xavier Swann, gave you all purpose. A reason to live. Last Monday night, I gave you all a glimpse.. a taste.. of true perfection. Not this “shit on titles and lose all my matches” rubbish, which that Maverick clown keeps banging on about. I mean REAL perfection. I mean, did you see the way I single handedly took down that bearded terrorist and the black snowman?! It was a thing of beauty! Sure, there was some other guy in the match.. I can't even remember his name, Ariel the Mermaid or something.. but he was irrelevant anyway. He got his fifteen seconds of fame sharing precisely one eighth of my spotlight, as promised, but we all know who the TRUE star was that night.

I mean, I'm sure you could just ask Wallace.. he's probably still dragging his face pubes around ringside looking for his teeth. As for that rastafarian with the speech impediment? I tossed that shaft-jockey a mirror and showed him exactly what the Reflection of Perfection looks like! And yet, here we stand Frosty, a mere ten days later and you are actually stupid enough to step back into the ring with yours truly? I guess I knocked what little sense you had, completely out of that thick, grotesque cranium of yours last week. What's worse for you, Frosty, is that this is an extreme rules match. Don't let this perfect face fool you, Xavier Swann is more than prepared to get his hands dirty when the situation calls for it. If you thought stepping into that ring with myself last week was bad? Wait until you see what I do to you when you don't have Wallace by your side and there are no rules, Jetty-boy!

You know, I was thinking though, and it seems as though words offer little in terms of deterring you from the imminent prospect of the beating of a lifetime! I mean, even after I warned you last week, you were still foolish enough to think that you could actually hang with the Sultan of Style! So, for your benefit, I have prepared a little presentation. Why should all those fat slobs at home have to wait for tomorrow night to see me dismantle you? Why not give them Xavier Swann versus Frosty the Snowman.. right here.. right now! Now, granted, this is not an actual depiction of what will happen tomorrow night.. Stan Frost over here is obviously in better shape and will be able to withstand much more of a beating, but you'll get the idea! Oh, and since it's Christmas, Frosty.. I'll be bringing you a few presents!”

The camera zooms out slightly to reveal the pile of goods Xavier had Sarah fetch earlier in the day. Swann walks over and grabs the steel chair first. Stan looks terrified and holds his his hands up, pleading with Xavier to reconsider. CRACK! Swann blasts his rotund security guard straight over the skull with a vicious chair shot, which makes Stan go cross-eyed and collapse to the ground.

Xavier Swann: “You like that, Frosty?! Huh?!”

Swann hits him across the back with another loud CRACK! Before tossing the steel chair down.

Xavier Swann: “Think you're in my league?! Get up!”

Xavier walks over and grabs the kendo stick next. Stan sits upright.. WHACK! Kendo stick to the head of Stan, who falls down again. Xavier Swann lays across the enormous gut of Stan.

Xavier Swann: “Sarah! Count him! Count him!”

Sarah Myers looks extremely unimpressed, but slowly gets down to her knees and begins to count. One.. Two.. Xavier Swann lifts Stan's shoulders off the grass and shakes his head. Myers just rolls his eyes as Swann walks over and grabs the pliers. He grabs Stan by the nose and twists, the sheer pain causing Stan to come-to and start screaming in agony.

Xavier Swann: “Ask him! Ask him!”

Sarah asked Stan if he gives up.. he tries nodding his head and screaming yes, but it's not distinguishable. Swann reaches behind him and grabs the jar of jelly beans and tips the contents into the mouth of Stan, who starts to gag. He let's go with the pliers. and grabs the staple gun. One, two, three, four, five staples to the head off Stan Frost! Blood starts to run over the painted brown skin of Stan. Xavier Swann stands up.

Xavier Swann: “Had enough, Snowman?! Huh?! You want some more?!”

Swann looks behind him to see what is left, and notices the ladder. Stan Frost lays there motionless with his mouth still full of jelly beans.

Xavier Swann: “I know you love ladders! They're your favourite! Let's see how you like this one!”

Xavier Swann sets the ladder up before climbing to about the sixth rung. He turns around and lands a splash on the stomach of Stan, taking the wind out of him and sending a colourful array of jelly beans flying into the air. Swann gets up and kicks the ladder out of his way, before placing a single boot on the chest of Stan and telling Myers to count to three, which she does. Xavier Swann takes his foot off and smirks as the camera zooms in to focus on the upper torso of Swann.

Xavier Swann: “Raise my hand!”

Sarah rolls her eyes, and makes her way around to the back of Stan, who is unconscious. She raises Xavier's hand as he screams “yeah bab-ay!”. He then stares down the camera lens with that grin still present.

Xavier Swann: “You see that, Frosty?! That is EXACTLY what is going to happen to you tomorrow night! It's a disgrace to my name that I even find myself in the ring with such an insignificant piece of trash like yourself! Tomorrow night, my star will continue to shine, and what is left of your diminishing career will be put to rest, for good. It makes no difference what you say, or do, for there can be only one. X-Treme rules simply means that this match ends when I say it ends.. when I feel as though I have put you through enough pain, so as to ensure that you never stick your damn carrot nose in my business again! It's time to stop pretending kid, the fact of the matter is, you couldn't hang with me when Wallace was in your corner and you sure as hell don't stand a chance when it's just you and me!

I am, the Reflection of Perfection.. the Sultan of Style.. the RULER.. OF THE UNIVERSE! Tomorrow night on Warfare, I'm going to show you the true meaning of perfection. When I send you into oblivion with your very own Swann Song, you will know, that Prince Perfect is not just some cute moniker that I have bestowed upon myself.. it means that I am next in line to the throne.”

Xavier Swann continues to smirks wickedly at the camera as the scene fades to black.

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode "God damn it, Frosty!"
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