Incheon Asiad Main Stadium
Incheon, South Korea

Ryles - vs - Vile - vs - Woeful Triple Threat Match Guest Decapitator, if needed: John Madison* Wolverina - vs - Miss Kimberleigh - vs - Alexis Valentine - vs - Liz Hathaway Fatal 4 Way, 1 Fall Guest Ref: Lucky Gator!* Guest Decapitator, if needed: Shane Anonistrator* Father Steve - vs - Scully Standard Match Atomsk - vs - Socrates X-treme Rules Clean Lucena - vs - Luke Gunnar Standard Match Guest Ref: Mr. some shitty fed* MAIN EVENT X-treme Championship Mastermind - vs - SwagMire Swaggins X-treme Rules *Guest refs and guest decapitators are welcome to RP making their intentions known, whether it's to help someone, screw someone over, or whatever else they want

What a show here we have at Warfare! But of course, the unexpected happens as the arena is filled with a new superstar's music...


As the video plays on the Xtron, a young man with long brown hair appears at the top of the ramp. He stands there, wearing a suit, hands on his hips with his head held high. These fans aren'tsure what to think! They've never seen this guy before! He makes his way down the ramp and toward the ring, grinning arrogantly...almost evilly. The young scotsman climbs the steps...he's getting into the ring! Is he gonna fight someone?! No...maybe just a challenge. He stands there for a moment before being handed a live mic, and begins to speak in the most arrogant tone possible.

"Inchenon, South Korea..."

He sneers as the Korean fans cheer. A cheap pop, if you will. The translators start doing their business as he continues to speak.

"...dirty, smelly Koreans..."

He shakes his head, the fans now booing the newcomer. Martin shrugs.

"...boo all ya want, but ya still stink. Let me introduce myself to ya, folks. Name's McPherson an' I'm takin' over Warfare. Nay, let's just say I'm takin' over this whole Federation, but ya know, I 'spose Warfare is a good start."

"I know what yer thinkin', cause alotta guys...well, they come around an' claim the same thing. But me? Ya see, I'm different. I'm from a whoooooleeee different class o' athlete an' I stick to what I said. Actions, boys an' girls, they speak louder than words. An' after tonight..."

He chuckles.

"...well, ya all will see. Hit the music!"

And as his music plays, we cut to commercial. Don't change that channel!

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Woe starts off the match running straight towards the opposition and clotheslines them both. He lifts Ryles and begins slamming him on top of Vile with both hands on Ryles legs. He throws Ryles into the corner and charges him with a spear to the abdomen. He begins stomping on the head of Vile. Ryles gets up and tugs at the mask of Woe. Woe pushes him off.

WOE: Oh no you don’t mother fucker.

Woe hits a huge hurricanrana on Ryles. He mounts him and begins striking his face with punch after punch until Ryles face is a gorey mess. He reaches up at Woe’s mask again. Woe glares at him before lifting him to a standing position by the hair and hitting the Toxicity off the top rope. (Super Powerbomb) John Madison is shown outside of the ring gleefully awaiting who will be executed as he sharpens the blade on the guillotine. He tests it several times using a carrot. Vile finally stands up only for Woe to grab him by the arm and lock him in EL DESPUENTE! Vile taps out immediately.

Winner: Woe

Woe powerbombs Vile on top of Ryles. He is standing over the bodies of his fallen adversaries as he raises his hand in victory. Woe doesn’t seem impressed and seems rather pissed off at the lack of competition.

WOE: THIS?! THIS is what the echelon of the XWF comes up with to test the aptitude of Woe? If this is all Warfare has to offer, then I'll be main eventing this bitch before my third match-up. I'm here to kick ass. Not pander to mindless morons and not to make acquaintances. Now, the powers that be, lets rectify this botheration before I begin dismembering this brand piece by piece.

Woe stares straight into the camera and drops the microphone on top of the prone bodies of Vile and Ryles.

Woe picks up and drops the two limp bodies over the top rope as they collapse on the floor below. Woe grabs the body of Ryles and places him on the guillotine first. He begins to struggle slightly but Woe punches him in the back of the head. Madison lets the blade fall and the head of Ryles rolls into the bucket below. Woe throws the body away and grabs Vile. Vile tries to crawl away, but Woe slams him down on the guillotine hard and punches him in the ribs three or four times. Madison drops the blade and the head of Vile rolls away. Madison lifts Woe’s hand in victory, and Woe seems satisfied at the blood loss today.

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A limo is pulling up to the Incheon Asiad Stadium parking area... the back door opens, and "Loverboy" Vinnie Lane gets out with a pair of brand new, shiny gold belts! He's a Monday Madness competitor, and he isn't scheduled to be here tonight!

Steve Sayors approaches Loverboy at the limo as he walks toward the entrance.

Sayors: Loverboy! What are you doing in South Korea?

Loverboy: Don't you even worry about it, dude! I just wanted to bring these South Korean fans as much star power as they deserve, and I'm here to give some moral support to my partner and friend, Clean Lucena!

Sayors: What about Pest?

Loverboy looks right at the camera and grabs the mic from Steve Sayors' hand.

Loverboy: Pest? What about him?

Loverboy smiles, drops the mic and walks away, leaving Sayors to stand bumbling at the camera

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Gator and Shane Anonistrator both look very pleased to be here... under their masks. Ok, I guess we don't really know how pleased they look but we can just imagine with all these lovely ladies that they are very pleased, since you know, most people with penises would be pleased.

The bell rings and Liz Hathaway takes down Wolverina with a double leg takedown and just ground and pounds the living shit out of her face, instantly busting her open and sending blood splattering everywhere.

BOOM! Gator turns his attention and is surprised to see Shane cracking Kimberleigh in the head with an oversized watermelon!

Shane: Don't worry about me, Gator. I'm just doing my part to keep this match entertaining.

Gator turns back to see that Liz is still punching Wolvering in her face and it's starting to look like Wolverina's face is actually CAVING IN. It looks more like a big bowl of tomato soup than a face at this point.

Gator looks at Shane, somewhat unsure of how to call this as the referee. Does a caved in soup face warrant a ringing of the bell?

CRACK! Shane doesn't even care because he's busy breaking a giant glass jar of pickles over Alexis Valentine's head!

Shane: Gator, I think Liz might be ready to tap out. You better check on her.

Seeing that Liz is the aggressor over Wolverina, Gator just assumes Shane made a mistake. Liz finally gets up off of Wolverina and starts to kick Kimberleigh and Alexis around the ring with ease.

Shane: You stupid ass Sea Hag, just pin somebody so I can get to the decapitating already. I'm not getting paid by the hour here and neither are you!

Did Shane really just make a Sea Hag reference? I guess so, since now he's opening a can of spinach and using the sharp top of the can to cut into Alexis Valentine's neck. Gator isn't really sure what to make of all this but he still wants to make sure he does a good job reffing in front of his boss, so he keeps a close eye on the action as Alexis' blood splatters up at him. Shane cuts through Alexis' entire neck and rips her head from her body, throwing it across the ring!

Shane: Yay! One down and I didn't even need the guillotine! I like pee pee!

We always knew Shane wasn't right in the head, but now he's actually urinating into the neck hole of Alexis Valentine.

Liz grabs Miss Kimberleigh and piledrives her right into the already caved in face of Wolverina before making the quick cover as Shane had instructed. Gator counts the fall!

...1









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...THREE!!!!!!!!!!

Shane revs up a chainsaw and comes running at Liz! She dives out of the way as Shane swings wildly and it chops Kimberleigh's head off. He then starts stabbing it down into Wolverina's bowl face.

Shane: This is why the XWF needs a more traditional show where shit like this can't happen!

Shane turns off the bloody chainsaw and throws it at Gator's head, knocking him back and stumbling through the ropes.

Shane: Thanks for your excellent reffing job, Gator! Expect a nice bonus from me later!

Shane grabs Kimberleigh's head and drops his pants, shitting directly into the open wound of the head and filling it up so much that the eyeballs pop out! For some ungodly reason, shit filled condoms start falling out of Kimberleigh's head's mouth! Shane continues his antics, happy as a kid in a playground as he kicks heads around like they were foot balls and jumping up and down on decapitated bodies to see blood splash out of the neck holes. He even starts rolling around in the blood and bodies as the clean up crew hesitantly makes their way to the ring to take care of the mess.

Winner: Liz Hathaway

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We switch to a replay from Madness:

Quote:SCULLY: "I will now take a lighter and burn the British flag in response to Neonero!"


The fans cheer. Scully goes in his pocket and pulls out a ref lighter. Mr . Untouchable flicks the lighter on and waves it the sky as the flame is exposed. Scully smirks and throws the lighter to the ground, smashing it and making it pop.


SCULLY: "I don't know who this Noel is, but I bet he's full of crap. I don't care if he's sixteen, he's still old enough for a boot to the face! Neonero, your originally from South Korea but yet you act like a full English man..... Well you're not and I will not be forced to burn The Union Jack.... You can kiss my ass.....I look forward to seeing what bullshit you have made up, Neonero. Oh and Noel cam jump off a bridge. The end Scully has spoken!"


Scully drops the mic and waves the British flag high and proud. Scully's theme music hits as Scully smirks.

We open back up with a shot of Neonero backstage, whose face graces Warfare for the first time in nearly a year. However his face does not seem to imply any kind of joy. He looks at the camera and shakes his head, a sombre mood casting a glower over his features.

Noel can jump off a bridge...

I hope everyone caught that line, because it shows what a cold hearted bastard Scully really is. I will address his humorous if irrelevant comments about my nationality at another time, but for now, I must introduce you to a very brave young man, Noel?

A young teenager walks into shot, emo hairdo, band t-shirt, baggy jeans, converse sneakers. He hides behind his fringe, looking at the camera meekly.

Noel, please tell the people your story. It's ok, it's ok. I'm right here.

Umm...okay..umm...

Take your time.

It was seven years ago, I was nine...a camp in England...

For autistic kids, right?

Yes, I am autistic...

Carry on.

Well, every night we had hot chocolate before going back to our tents. Mr Scully was there. He was 22, one of the big camp teachers I think. I don't know his exact role.

I wouldn't be surprised if he wasn't even supposed to be there.

But he was a big boy. We did what the big boys said.

Of course. Go on..

Well, after I drank my chocolate, he told me strange things. I had a chocolate moustache, see. And he told me I looked like Rhett Butler, and I didn't know who that was. And he said kissing Rhett Butler must make his lippies tickle. And I didn't know what lippies meant. And then he said kissing me would be better because my moustache wasn't spiky, and I would taste of chocolate.

Disgusting. It didn't end there, did it?

No Sir. Mr Scully told me I had legs like Sebastian Coe. And I didn't know who that was. But he said they looked like strong running legs. He told me he bet he could beat me in a race in the woods. And Sir, I knew I wasn't allowed to go into the woods at night. But Mr Scully said it would be ok, he'd be right behind me...

Go on.

Well, we ran so far, and he kept shouting weird comments, something about how my but wiggled when I ran, then he was shouting about wiggly worms, and then...

And then he caught you?

Yes Sir. I didn't think I was supposed to be tackled, we were just racing. But after I went down, he pressed himself on top of me, I couldn't wiggle away. And -

SMACK

Young Noel is interrupted as a masked man flies into Nero, throwing him head-first into the wall, then turns to young Noel, hitting the Scullanator. The man then runs away and the camera focuses on the incapacitated young man, as Nero scrambles to his feet, looking into the camera.

Uh-uh. Not like this, Scully. The truth will out. We are days from Madness. I am going to give you another chance, Scully. Burn that flag, or Noel's story will out. And if you think you can scare him off, just be aware that since I brought Noel into the spotlight, several others have contacted me. Scully, you sick fuck, you have until Madness. And I bid you good day.

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The bell rings, but Father Steve takes this moment to say a brief prayer for both himself and Scully. Scully eyes him weirdly but interrupts the prayer with a dropkick which pushes the pastor out of the ring. Scully drops to his knees in mocking of the prayer for a second. The crowd begins furiously booing Scully. Scully climbs the top rope and, as the groggy Father stands up, launches himself off in a crossbody that connects! Father Steve looks to be in some pain as he hits the outside area hard.

Scully gets up and is taunting the prone man. Scully lifts up Father Steve and rolls him into the ring. Scully jumps on the apron and climbs the top rope. He goes for a Swanton Bomb, but Father Steve rolled out of the way! Scully grimaces in pain as Father Steve stands over him and begins striking his face with mounted jabs. Left, right, left, right, right, right right, left, left, right. The blows just keep coming in. Finally the referee gets Father Steve off and Scully rolls to the ropes. He uses them to help stand back up, but Father Steve isn’t letting him off that easy. Father Steve walks over and begins hitting some more blows, but Scully punches Father Steve hard enough to get some separation. Father Steve comes back, but Scully kicks him in the gut. Scully slides along the side of him and nails an Angle Slam sending Father Steve down to the mat.

Father Steve gets back up and hits a right hook as he comes up, staggering Scully. Father slides around the back of him and hits a Reverse DDT. He goes to cover, but Scully kicks him in the head. He stands back up and hits him with the swinging neckbreaker! THE END!

Scully doesn’t seem hesitant as he picks up the pastor. Scully lifts up Steve and hits a kick to the abdomen. He puts Steve’s head between his legs before spiking him into the mat with a piledriver. Scully is not finished as he picks up Steve and hits The Scullanator! (Reverse STO) Instead of pinning, Scully ascends the top rope and nails his other finishing move, Untouchable! (Corkscrew Shooting Star Press) He covers!

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3!!!


Winner: Scully

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We return from commercial break as Atomsk is already in the ring.

The Black Blade by Two Steps From Hell plays

Socrates enters very slowly. He walks towards the ring strong and casually as white smoke fills the entrance. Upon the turnbuckle he opens his arms like an angel and closes his eyes.

Both competitors are ready to fight, waiting in their respective corners. The ref signals for the bell. And Socrates wastes no time charging at Atomsk knocking him down with a clothesline, Atomsk quickly gets back up and is hit with another clothesline, this time Atomsk stays down for a moment as Socrates gloats.

Socrates picks up Atomsk and plants him back down with a DDT. He lands on the top of his head and reels in pain on the mat as Socrates heads for the top rope. Socrates opens his arms wide and leaps from the corner crashing on top of Atomsk with the perfect frog splash. Socrates gets to his knees and smiles widely to the cheering fans. The Greek Adonis gets to his feet and delivers few swift kicks to Atomsk as if he’s toying with him. But Socrates is not done yet he picks Atomsk up once more and holds his head under his arm and lifts him into a suplex and drops him. Socrates twists his legs and picks Atomsk up again, still in the hold. Another suplex!

Socrates releases his hold and kips up to and taunts. The crowd cheering him on to finish this match. Socrates waits for Atomsk to find his feet, which may take a while. After almost a minute of fumbling, the masked one finally gets up and stumbles towards Socrates who hits the drunk looking Atomsk across the mask with a hard right hook. Atomsk almost falls, but Socrates keeps him and delivers another hard punch whilst still holding him.

And another!

Socrates twists Atomsk around and Irish whips him to the ropes, Atomsk rebounds off and Socrates hits him with Hades Creed! (A jumping uppercut from a crouching position in which Socrates spins upwards, punching the opponent's face and knocking them straight back to the fiery depths of the Underworld.) Socrates goes for the cover and the ref begins to count!


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3!


Winner: Socrates!

An impressive show of domination from Socrates! He celebrates in the ring as his music plays.

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The camera feed cuts over to a shot of Miranda Tigris walking down a hallway, agitated look already plastered on her face. Down the hall she walks, until finally arriving at her desired destination; Totally Shane 's Office. Yes, the door is literally marked that. In notebook paper, accompanied with a scrawled - "KEEP OUT" notice. Completely disregarding that shit because ain't nobody got the time to actually pay attention to that keep out bullshit, Miranda rasps on the door, sighing. No response. So, she knocks harder. A noise of some sort comes from behind the door, though muffled by the wood. Shaking her head in frustration, she turns the handle and steps into the room, followed by our not so discreet cameraman.

However, Mr. Cameraman might not have been too happy to have done that. Mainly because He and Ms. Tigris have just walked in on Shane's mating ritual. A potato half wrapped in a condom jutting out of his outstretched asshole. The cameraman cringes, though Miranda smiles and chuckles, looking around to find many a potato stuffed into condoms lining his desk. However, her tune changes when she catches a whiff of the air. The color drains from her face as she falls backwards, unable to keep her balance. Her eyes roll backward into her head slightly before she CRASHES into the wall, which seems to get Shane's attention and cause him to fall ass first off the table!

HE SLAMS ONTO THE FLOOR! THE POTATO HAS TO BE JAMMED ALMOST ALL THE WAY UP HIS ASS!

Shane: You stupid waggle bagga! Look what you did!

Shane gets up and bends over, showing that there's blood all over his ass now and most of the potato is no longer visible. Miranda can't believe her eyes.

Shane: Gio would have never done this to me! Now get over here and pull this thing out of me!

Miranda takes a step back.

Shane: Are you seriously not going to help me? Well then as the BRAND NEW GOD of Warfare, I have no choice but to tell you something very important. Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyou're ffffffffffffffffffffired!!!!!! Now get off of MY show!

Did Shane really just announce himself the new "god" of Warfare at a time like this? No in ring segment? No official news broadcast? Instead we get THIS? Miranda does not look pleased.

Miranda: Oh, Shane. You're going to regret this. You'll fucking rue this decision, you deranged, potato fucking freak! When this show fails in a couple of months, you'll be to blame!

Seething, almost foaming from the mouth but smart enough to not do something she may regret later, Miranda turns around on her heel and makes her way out of Shane's office, followed by the dry heaving cameraman.

BUT WAIT! Shane snaps his fingers and out from the closet comes an endless trail of rapists in masks!

Shane: Get her!

We can tell they're rapists because they're all wearing black sweaters that have "rapist" embroidered on the front. Oh, and one other thing... none of them are wearing any pants.

Miranda shoves the camera man and he falls back into the rapists, knocking about 30 of them down while the rest of them keep storming out of Shane's closet and run after Miranda who is quickly scrambling down the hallway as fast as she can. It seems her quick thinking may have saved her, but not the poor camera man. Sad to say but it doesn't seem like these rapists have any actual sexual preference. Nice knowing you, camera man.

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Pounding bass drums hit the arena like thunder as "The Enemy" takes over the PA. Luke Gunnar storms out with a violent look in his eye and a smirk on his face. His eyes do not leave the ring as he continues to storm towards it. Once he reaches the squared-circle he wastes no time and leaps up to the ropes and through them into the ring. Luke is ready and roaring for combat as he paces back and forth in anticipation.


The proud man, Clean Lucena, walk to the ring, exactly like the man on "mi gran noche" videoclip, vintage classic gentleman, smiling and pretending to be nice, pointing everyone.

Mr. Shitty Fed is already present and is doing the usual pre-match checks. The match begins with a lock up, both men pushing back and not letting up on the other. After a back and forth effort, Gunnar interrupts the exchange with an arm drag, and quickly transitions into an arm bar. He maintains the hold for a couple of seconds before Lucena crawls across the ring for a rope break. Once Gunnar lets up on Lucena, Mr. Shitty Fed brings them both to the center. Lucena runs at Gunnar for an elbow strike, but Gunnar counters with an arm drag.

Lucena pops right back up from the arm drag. He runs after Lucena for an elbow strike, but Gunnar reverses into a spine buster. Gunnar pins Lucena.

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Kick out by Lucena.

Gunnar throws Lucena into the ropes and catches him running with a crossface chicken wing. Lucena struggles for a couple of seconds in the center of the ring, but breaks free after kicking his feet off the corner turnbuckle pad. That allows him to put all his weight onto Gunnar as they crash on the mat. As Gunnar recovers to his feet, Lucena runs off the ropes and hits him with a running drop kick. Gunnar gets right back up but Lucena runs up and hits him with a springboard elbow strike. Lucena gives Gunnar a running elbow drop and pins him.

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Kick out!

Lucena stalks Gunnar from behind, waiting for him to fully recover. Once Gunnar is up, Lucena runs up and hits him with a back stabber. Lucena makes the cover, Mr. Shit Fed counts.

1



This count is a bit slow...

2


Kick out!

Mr. Shit Fed slow counted that one.

Wait a minute, look up there on stage! It's Loverboy Vinnie Lane, and he's making his way to ringside with a title belt in each hand. He must not be pleased with how the match is being called in the ring.

Lucena tells Mr. Shit Fed to speed up the count, but Mr. Shit Fed assures Lucena that he's calling it down the middle.

Gunnar gets up and tries to attack Lucena with a punch, but Lucena ducks under, and hits Gunnar with the Clean Flurry (three punches Rock style). After the final punch, Gunnar falls back into the ropes and bounces back towards Lucena. Lucena catches him in the cheek with a roundhouse kick.

Lucena is now getting his elbow ready. He removes the elbow pad and warms up his elbow, smacking it repeatedly. He goes after Gunnar for the Metta World Peace (spinning back elbow) but as he's rotating his body, Mr. Shit Fed runs through him with a lariat! Holy shit, crooked fucking officiating.

Mr. Shit Fed shakes his head as he looks down at Lucena in disappointment.

But wait-- Loverboy is now in the ring. He pulls off his Motley Crue shirt to reveal a referee shirt underneath! Two referees-- what the fuck? Pest isn't happy with the stance that Loverboy has taken and is getting in his face about it. Loverboy is just taunting Mr. Shit Fed who is ordering him to exit the ring.

Back to the action...

Gunnar is up now. He didn't see what happened, so for all he knows, Lucena slipped and fell.

Gunnar runs off the ropes as Lucena is recovering, and hits Lucena with a spear.

Gunnar picks up Lucena and lifts him into the air for the Mill City Misery (Hellevator).

Lucena shifts his weight though and breaks out of the move. Lucena then begins to Clean-Up (parody of the Hulk up) Gunnar. Clean drops Gunnar with a big boot after throwing a series of punches. Lucena then goes for the Metta World Peace (Spinning Back Elbow) but MR. SHIT FED interrupts again!

Mr. Shit Fed throws a punch at Lucena mid-rotation, but Lucena blocks it! Lucena then shoves Mr. Shit Fed and Mr. Shit Fed lands into the hands of Loverboy Vinnie Lane! Uh-oh... Vinnie nails Mr. Shit Fed with an uppercut that sends him spinning around. Mr. Shit Fed is now face to face with Lucena!

Lucena then points at Mr. Shit Fed

YOU!

Lucena hits Mr. Shit Fed with a bunch of punches, and finishes with an eye poke that puts Shit Fed on the mat.

Vinnie Lane begins to yell at Mr. Shit Fed to "get up!" since Lucena is probably gonna go for the finish on Gunnar.

But before Lucena can turn to face his opponent, Gunnar runs up behind him and drops him with a bulldog. Gunnar then picks up Lucena and gives him the Mill City Misery (Hellevator). Gunnar pins Lucena.

Mr. Shit Fed turns over and quickly counts

1

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3!

Winner: Luke Gunnar

Vinnie Lane is too late to stop the fast count. Right after the count, Pest tries to crawl away, but he's cut off by Vinnie who steps in front of him.

Pest rises up to his knees as he looks up at Vinnie, and then back at Lucena who's just recovered and looks pissed off.

Loverboy nails Mr. Shit Fed with the title belt, and dildos go flying into the audience from the impact!

IT'S RAINING DILDOS! Fans go wild as they try to catch them and actually begin fighting over them. Holy shit!

Pests gets up to his feet to try and defend himself. Clean Lucena has one of the dildos that fell on the floor and gets ready to hit him...

WAIT!

Mr. Shit Fed's ugly ass bitch, Barbie, grabs the dildo from Lucena! She kicks him in the balls! Where did that ugly swamp rat even come from? Mr. Shit Fed grabs the dildo from Barbie and throws it at Vinnie and it hits him in the head like a ton of bricks, knocking his head back and he falls to the ground. Why the hell was that particular dildo SO heavy? Jesus Christ!

Mr. Shit Fed runs up and grabs Vinnie's new titles and begins hammer fisting them down into his face to make sure he's out cold.

Mr. Shit Fed now grabs Lucena and begins to slam his face repeatedly into the turnbuckle. After five slams, he drops Lucena, walks over and picks up Lucena's belt, which he sets on the concrete outside of the ring next to both of Vinnie's new titles. Barbie hands Pest a bottle from the audience, and he begins to dump the contents on all three belts. He pauses for a moment before removing a cigarette from his pocket, and a book of matches. He calmly places the cigarette in his mouth before lighting a match, and dropping it on the belts, which all erupt into flames!

Fans: Holy smokes! Holy smokes! Holy smokes!

Mr. Some Shitty Fed With Like 3 Roster Members: "Oh yeah. I don't smoke. But your belts do."

Crew members rush out from the back to extinguish the flames as Mr. some shitty fed and his hideous tramp walk to the back.

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Swagmire Swaggins dances like a moron to the ring. In his mind though, he's the coolest man in the room.


After that pathetic display; the lights go out, and then when they come back on Mastermind is seen standing on the top rope waving to the crowd. "Monster" by Rihanna is playing while he waves his hands.

Keeping the X-Treme rules aspect of the match in mind, Mastermind goes under the ring and pulls out whatever he can find hidden under there. There's a couple of steel chair that he tosses in the ring, a six foot chain, and a bronze urn. Not sure why the hell someone would put an urn under the ring, but it's now in the match.

With the chairs, six foot chain, and urn in the ring, Mastermind decides that he's got enough "toys" for now.

Swagmire just looks down at the assortment of weapons lying in front of him.

Mastermind slides in under the bottom rope and grabs a steel chair. He goes to whack Swagmire with it and expects him to tense up or put his hands up, but instead, Swagmire begins dancing again! Damn it, why is he dancing instead of defending himself?! Mastermind must be wondering the same thing as he stops mid-swing with the chair in hand. It's a clever distraction that allows Swagmire to dance all the way up to Mastermind and deliver a big boot to his nuts!

Mastermind was doubled over from that attack, allowing Swagmire to walk up to him and utilize a snap suplex that puts Mastermind back-first on the pile of steel chairs. There's around four steel chairs that Mastermind introduced earlier in the match.

Swagmire turns his attention to the six foot chain. He picks it up, dances a little bit, and smashes Mastermind over the back with it! Swag then stands over Master and uses the chain to apply a camel clutch. Swag isn't a submission specialist by any means, but this is probably the best way to put that chain to use.

Swagmire's form isn't all that good though, and Mastermind is able to stand up to his feet and throw Swagmire over.

Mastermind then rips the chain out of Swagmire's hands. As Mastermind and Swagmire are fighting, suddenly the Haka of the New Zealand All Blacks is heard on the sound system, and both wrestlers looked towards the stage, suddenly Swagmire is speared tackled from behind as Manu the Warrior has come from the crowd and into the ring.

He gets up and looks down at Swagmire.

"Next time don't be an idiot, or attempt to duck my challenges, or be racist. I want a match, when I ask again, you will give it to me, otherwise I will keep interfering in your matches."

Manu kicks him, and turns to Mastermind. He signals him to make the pin. He walks to the other side of the ring.


Mastermind picks up Swag and tosses him in the ring. He pins Swag for the title.

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Swag shoots his shoulder up. His knees are probably too banged up to be doing any kicks outs.

Master transitions to a headlock on Swag, and pulls him up to his feet. He then shoots Swag off into the ropes and gives him a back body drop. After that, Master begins to kick Swag around the ring. Swagmire is just rolling around as Master puts the boots to his back. Swag eventually comes across the object he was hoping to stumble over; the urn. Swag takes off the lid of the urn, reaches his hand inside, and flings a handful of ashes into the face of Mastermind!

Holy shit, Mastermind has a mouth full of someone's remains! Mastermind is spitting it out and trying to get the ashes out of his eyes.

That give Swagmire enough time to recover. Swag hits Master in the nuts with the urn, and then drops him on the mat with a pile driver! Swag makes the cover.

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Kick out!

Swagmire grabs the urn and drops it over the head of Mastermind. Swag then runs off the ropes, with the urn in hand to use on Mastermind, but Mastermind hits him with a punch to the stomach, and gives him a fisherman suplex, along with a pin!

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2




Kick out...

Master picks up a steel chair. He runs off the ropes with it and elbow drops it into the chest of Swagmire, pinning him with it right after.

1

2



Shoulder up!

Mastermind immediately puts the headlock on Swag. He's still trying to shake off the dust after getting the contents of that urn thrown in his face. Master pulls Swag up to his feet, and slams his elbow down on the back of his neck. Master runs off the ropes and hits Swaggy with a running DDT. Master pins Swagmire again.

1

2



Kick out!

Master climbs up to the top rope following that failed pin attempt. He makes the leap off the top and takes out Swagmire with the Mind Changer (flying clothesline)! Master then pulls Swag up and throws him in the Mind Sleeper (sleeper hold). He keeps it applied only for a couple of seconds before Swagmire breaks out of it with a back kick that hits Mastermind in the nut sack.

Both guys are down before recovering at the same time.

Swag punches Mastermind in the face and tries to throw him into the corner, but Mastermind reverses it with an Irish whip of his own. Master then clotheslines Swag in the corner, and throws a combination of punches. Master goes for a back body drop as Swag hobbles out of the corner. But Swag counters with a kick to Master's face. Swag then hits Mastermind with a pedigree onto a steel chair! Swag pins Master.

1

2



Master puts his foot on the ropes!

Swagmire executes a leg split on Mastermind, and then hits him with a headbutt to the groin. Swagmire then goes for a second groin headbutt, but Mastermind catches him with the Hell's Gate!

But wait, Swagmire pulls out a bar of soap with his free hand, and rubs it into the eyes of Mastermind! He's not only rubbing it, he's bashing Mastermind in the face with it! Mastermind now has soap and ashes in his face. But Mastermind won't let go, not until Swagmire begins to force that bar of soap into the mouth of Mastermind. Sick. Not only because it's a bar of soap but also because it was wedged in the backside of Swagmire's pants.

Swagmire is now choking Mastermind by forcing the bar of soap into his mouth. Mastermind eventually goes limp and stops fighting it.

Swagmire gets up, runs off the ropes, and curb stomps the bar of soap into Mastermind's mouth!

Swagmire pins Mastermind who's spitting up chunks of the soap.


1

2




Kick out!

Mastermind rises to his feet and with a spurt of pure adrenaline, he lunges at Swagmire and immediately locks in the Mind Controller! He's gonna retain the Xtreme Championship!

Swagmire is fading...wait...who's that running the the crowd?

That's McPherson!

He slides into the ring, putting the boots to the Master of Minds! Mastermind is to his feet, fighting back! Block by the newcomer!

Low blow!

McPherson setting up for what appears to be a T-bone suplex...no! He falls baclwards instead, dropping Mastermind Headfirst onto the steel chair! McPherson drapes Swagmire's arm over Mastermind and slides out of the ring. As the referee counts...


1..




2...




3!


McPherson: I told you I'd make an impact!



New X-treme Champion: Swagmire Swaggins


Warfare fades on the new X-treme Champ!

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Anyway congrats to Swagmire. I'll evoke my rematch clause in the next few weeks. I do have a rematch clause?

It's been fun. 8 days of Extreme Champion.

Unlucky Mastermind, you put up a good fight dude.

"Look, I called it. Now, Paul and I have a deal to work out."

uni title here i come!

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion

(09-04-2014, 09:23 AM)Peter Fn Gilmour Said: uni title here i come!

Keep dreaming. You're a scrub.

That's right, Shane's running the show now!

Good job out there tonight, Shane.

You people better get your shit together. Play time is OVER!

Hey, Tommy Gunn has a match this week... Would you like to referee that one, Peter?

@Peter Fn Gilmour

Last time I checked John you were still just a referee yourself.

In fact, you still work for me.

Or have you let the power get to your head already?

Look at that, Peter Gilmour's personal cheerleader is back.

Where is your skirt and pom poms John?

Tell you what, if Peter Gilmour wants to ref this match let him.

Of course what that means is that next week when he faces Guppy I will be the ref for that match not that Guppy needs me, truth be told a wet leaf could pin Peter Gilmour but it will still be fun for me.

I can do that right? Assign myself to ref a match? After all we are just two people employed by the federation and not actually in any position of power right John?

How does that sound Peter?

You ref my match next week and I'll ref your match the week after that.

@Guppy Parsh

"When do I get my belt?"

Tell you what Swagmire. You still owe me a match.

But I'm a nice guy, ask your brother, he follows me around repeatedly and I haven't killed him yet.

In fact, I was even going to save him from those Ukrainians.

So how about we do this.

Instead of us having a match, you give me the X-treme title, then I have a match with Peter in which I defend it. And you can be the special guest ref. Hell you and Frodo can we can make it a family affair.

Let's see how fast Gilmour jumps on my balls to get a match then.

"Oddly, your boss wants to meet with me Monday about trading the title to him. How about you, Paul, and Swaggy makes three have a meeting about it at Madness?"

I'll be there.

Do you guys think I did a good job as guest decapitator?

It feels GOOD to be back in the slice of things! Germany here we come... and byebye Miranda. Nice knowing you.

tommy i know if u ref my match u will fuck it up so ill do you one better. if one of us steps over the line, the match we have doesnt happen OR the one that goes over the line has to be subject to a stipulation.. (sadly wont be me)

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion

Holy mother of fuck.

Peter Gilmour exercising some logic that actually makes sense.

In honor of this momentous and honestly completely shocking moment I will accept your terms.

You ref my match next week, I ref yours on the 17th. Either of us crosses the line and the other gets to name a stipulation for our match.

But who will decide what "the line" is, that cannot be crossed? There needs to be a third official, officiating you officials to make sure the result of the match is, well, official. I'm volunteering my services voluntarily to be the officially sanctioned official official for officiating official sanctions.

Though I'm plaintive to say that Peter Gilmour will likely prefer someone that will further his agenda rather than fairness. And you bitches know I be all about fairness.

"Blizzard, I'm not being plaintive or whatever but I know you don't like Peter that much, so I'm suggesting that I be the official official's official and I'll keep an eye on you, making sure you don't cross said line. I'm chaotic neutral here towards everyone, so you all know I'll be fair."

id choose Maddy but I'd pick Gator in his place :P

and FUCK U AIDAN!

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion

Calm down, pusillanimous pussy.

SUCK MY DICK!

SUCK... MY... DICK!

3X Star of the Month
Former 3x Hart Champion
Former 13X Xtreme Champion
Former 6X Tag Champion
Former 2X Trios Champion
Former 2x Heavy Metal Weight Champion
Former Universal Champion

Shitty Fed...