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The Enigma · (07-02-2014)

Olive Pendershore.

She of the biggest balls in the XWF and I do not mean that as a slight I truly do not. You see I issued an open challenge which means I gave anyone who wanted it a free shot at me. Truth be told I have been gone for a little while so I figured why not get back in the game the right way by laying it all on the line and giving anyone who wants to face me in the ring that opportunity. I figured that someone like Frodo who certainly loves to name drop me would jump at the opportunity but I guess he just could not jump high enough. I even figured that after the Black Circle cost him his hard “earned” tag team title belt that he might use that motivation to come at me hard. But no. Instead he opts to face guys like Matt Damon.

Ok no Frodo no problem. Surely one of the Warfare Warriors would man up and accept my challenge. Griffin MacAlister perhaps, maybe Peter Gilmour, he likes to talk a big game. But no. No Griffin, no Peter.

I don’t blame any of the cowards. After all, who else can say that in consecutive bouts they won an X-treme title, a United States title and a Twenty Four Seven Briefcase? Probably not many, if any. Oh but that is right big brother Sebastian is the reason I have everything I have is that not right Frodo? Where are you at tough guy? Hiding behind Scorpio in the Wendy’s drive thru? I’m coming for you next.

So while the rest of the XWF roster is shaking in their collective boots I instead get Olive Pendershore. You all know her right? She has won some big matches in her career. And by some I mean one. Do you all remember that match? It was a little while ago. She beat then Mr. Supernova and Dr. Zero. No wait…that is not right. It wasn’t Dr. Zero, it was Stevie Tyler. I’m sure that is a common mistake right? I guess if you are incapable of remembering who it is you wrestle it is. Not a mistake I would make but that is me.

But I want to get back on track here, this is not about bashing Olive not yet anyway. Once again, when no one else would man up and accept the challenge she did, all five foot four inches and one hundred and ten pounds of her. Not that you will care about such a thing but Olive you have earned my respect here. Regardless of how easily I beat you down you have earned my respect. When everyone else cowered in the corner afraid to face me you raised your hand and said “put me in coach.” And now here we are, in an Xtreme rules match no less. Anything goes. So say, if I want to bash Olive’s face in with a steel pipe I get to do it and there is not a single person that can stop me. Not the ref, former tag team champion and current Wendy's spokesman Scorpio. And not even Olive’s new fuck doll Griffin MacAlister. You hear that Griff? I am going to bash your girls face in, come down to the ring and do something about it, I dare you.

So now that we have established that the vast majority of the XWF is a bunch of talkers afraid to back anything up we come to Olive. Little Olive. I’ll hand it to you Olive, you have a way with words, it is almost cute. Almost. Punisher PJ’s? Super hero insults? Calling me niggy? Are there a few other insults you want to borrow from your fellow wrestlers or are you going to attempt to come up with something original? No I do not suspect you would because that would require thought, real actual effort on your part and that’s just too much to ask from you is it not? After all you claim that you gave Azreal and Dr. Zero, sorry Stevie Tyler no effort and won.

If you want to give little to no effort in our match as you claim then so be it. Who am I to stop you? If you think that giving only slightly more effort than you gave Azrael and Dr. Zero, damn it, I did it again just like you. What I mean to say is, if you think you can beat me because you beat Azrael and Stevie Tyler than you my dear are as delusional as you are dumb and tonight, if you are lucky I am going to beat some sense into you.

I called you a whore and your response is that it’s the easiest insult in the book. You are damn right it is. Absolutely I went to the well for that one. It is the easiest insult in the book and in this case it also happens to be true. You know what else is true? You are a hypocrite. You sit there and throw insults my direction calling me things like a super hero and an avenger and yet you are the one who slept with Theo Pryce after he punched out a guy who was about to attack you. You then parlayed that bad decision into sleeping with Griffin MacAlister after he saved you from a botched robbery attempt. Does that mean if someone swoops in tonight and saves you from the ass kicking I am going to give you that you will then try and sleep with them? Hey Frodo did you hear that? You have been trying to get into Mandii Rider’s pants for so long you forgot there were other whores, there’s that word again, on the roster. Come down to the ring tonight, save Olive and she might other suck on your little rape pickle.

But enough about Frodo, he will get his in time in a few weeks. Assuming of course that he doesn't run and hide.

Shall we get back to Olive? According to you Olive it does not bother you that I called you a whore, I can appreciate that. It is big of you to brush a comment of that off like it is nothing. It would be even bigger of you if you actually brushed it off rather than telling me that you are not a whore and it does not matter what I say and that I ca not convince you otherwise. You see if you really did not care you would not even address it. It would not have even registered to you. But it did register. You did respond because you do care. That is indisputable. You want to debate me on the accuracy of the claim? Go for it. Argue until you are blue in the face. But what you cannot argue is whether or not you care because your own words proved that you do.

I enjoy your usage of sarcasm, another tool for mental midgets such as yourself. A psychiatrist, really? What is so shitty about your life that you need to see a shrink? Or should I say did need to see a shrink. He actually offers you some worthwhile advice, do not date a mass murderer and what do you do? Make him out to be a bad guy. That is one way to do it. And I am sure Griffin will get you to buy into his nonsense about being a hitman for hire, I suppose in your messed up cranium you think that makes it ok right? Peter Gilmour used that same excuse once and people mock him for it. But with your bravado you will just shrug it off right? Pretend that it does not bother you even though we all know it does. Maybe you can go and see your shrink and cry on his couch and tell him all about the mean things that the bad man in the Batman pajama’s had to say about you. Oh that is right, you won see him anymore because he called you out on your nonstop poor choices. But he is the idiot right? Olive is never wrong. And in case it was not abundantly clear that is me using a little of your sarcasm.

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