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Kendall Savannah Sawyer · (03-29-2014)

I'm sorry Julian, were you saying something?

I ask, because I couldn't quite make out what points you were trying to make over your sense of self worth, that's inflated to the point of being on par with the Zimbabwean economy. I ask, because the words that fell out of your mouth are incredibly unbecoming of someone who supposedly studied at Cambridge. And lastly, I ask because not a single syllable of what you said made any god damned sense in the slightest.

Pardon my language, but it needed to be said rather coarsely, or else most would mistake my lack of vulgarity with a silent acceptance for Martin's certain quality of saying outwardly ridiculous things in an attempt to feign a valid point until he thinks of one. A task that shouldn't be so hard for someone who, I reiterate because I feel the importance of this certain tidbit of information cannot be understated, studied at Cambridge. However, it looks to be that way from the way he rambled on and on about the history of wrestling as if he would be able to change the opinions of anyone he's railing against not so subtly, to the eye roll inducing shots at not only my own personal life, but the personal life of Anthea Deveraux and the supposed "midget" status of someone who is in actuality five foot, six inches tall. Now, what is the actual height requirement to be considered a dwarf?

Well, Julian? What is it?

Give up? Four feet, ten inches tall. Also, here's another fact you seem to not understand; sixty-six inches (otherwise known as 5'6") is a larger number than fifty-eight inches, otherwise known as four feet, ten inches.

So much for a "novelty act," huh?

Now, some would ask me one simple question regarding my decision to in essence stick up for one of my opponents despite the fact that he won't do the same for me. The answer to that is simple: poking at the intellectual shortcomings of someone who again I must emphasize, studied at Cambridge is an incredibly satisfying way to spend time. However, I'm sure he has an excuse all planned out for when someone corrects him though. That tends to be the case with people who are practically required to conjure up wild lies to cover up for the never ending supply of stupidity that falls out of their mouths more often than not.

So go on. Tell me. Tell us all: what is your backup? Oh, hyperbole! Facetious hyperbole not meant to be taken literally! How could I have missed that?

Right, because it's still a stupid notion.

However, if he had spent the entirety of his verbal potshot fest aiming for Frodo, I'd first of all be lying for a comment I earlier, and also wouldn't even be talking about it.

Yet, he also trashed myself and the other person in this match; Anthea Deveraux. Or, as the man who studied at Cambridge would say, Athena Deveraux.

How hard were those tests you claim to have aced? I'm sure you weren't tasked with remembering names, huh?

Now, severely distasteful for the sake of being severely distasteful comments aside, I can't really find anything about what he said about her to point out. However, I'm not tossing your oh so shameless attempt at-

What would you call that, anyway? Dark humor? No, it was both too obvious and too unfunny to be that.

Intimidation? Sorry to ruin your chimeric facade, but I can't look past your surprisingly level of idiocy despite your supposed level of advanced schooling at a university that reeks of pretentious, pseudo intellectual smugness that plagues people who claim to have attended such institutions.

I say claim, because he's proven himself to be simply too stupid to measure up to the implied level of "eliteness" that the school is known for.

I also say claim, because with his stupid, insensitive comments, he's made himself out to be the laughingstock of the alumni. How long until (assuming his claims are actually correct and he skated by with the aid of cheating) the school finds out that their former student is making an utter ass out of himself at their expense and promptly excommunicate him? Maybe expunge him from the record so no one can claim he ever even went there? Y'know, to really knock the wind out of his sails?

Schadenfreude isn't something I normally feel, but in that case I'm not lying when I say seeing him fall from grace like that would make me laugh like a common sociopath. Maybe I'll just send the video proof of your relentless idiocy and tactlessness to the University. Maybe then I'll learn whether or not you actually studied there.

I'm guessing I'll find that you didn't. Why do you feel the need to lie, Julian? Is it because you aren't adequate enough to impress on your own merits?

Should I poke into your supposed undefeated record to reveal that your real record is something meager like, say six wins to zero losses?

Worse yet - what if your record in all actuality reads zero wins to zero losses? And that's being generous. That's allowing your claim of being undefeated to be true when there's likely a good chance of that being a lie as well.

And that isn't getting onto the matter of what you said about me. Really, genius things there. I mean that with all the dishonesty I can muster.

Talking about supposed indecisiveness as an insult.

Objection your honor: relevancy?

Oh, there is none? Of course.

However, he then tries to take a look into my own life. What, is there a hidden camera following me around? Or, are you throwing darts at an imaginary dartboard while hoping that you land correct on something?

Yet, the most egregious of all offenses he makes throughout this rant: claiming he cares little for what he deems "soap operas" in others' personal lives, yet his entire attack on me comes from supposed events in my personal life. Shows he does care a lot more than he lets on.

So, to recap: Julian Martin is a hypocritical, lying moron stuck in a chimeric fantasy of success that he's much too inept to ever attain and because of this, if he were to say anything, it would be easily struck down. So I repeat:

I'm sorry Julian, were you saying something?

Because all that came out, was a big, heaping serving of bland nothingness.

That's what you represent though, isn't it?

Beige.

Nothing.

An over inflated ego to cover up a deficiency in talent and all can see it. Wake up from your delusion.

Embrace reality.

It's your eternity.

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