OOC: Ashen/Pryce/Samuels collab






Nothingness fades into the tranquility that is Senator John Samuels’ bedroom. The room is dark and quiet, with just the occasional stomping of Samuels’ prized longhorn breaking the silence. A large Texas flag is pinned above the bed of the sleeping man. Samuels is sprawled out in bed, the comforter covering more of the floor than the bed and it’s occupant. As Samuels’ face is brought in closer, his lips curl into a fiendish grin.

Samuels: “Mmmm Rose…”

Curling his upper lip, a faint moan escapes his mouth.

Samuels: “Oh Mrs. Smith, I’ll take you to Washington.”

Samuels’ hand slowly makes it’s way inside his tighty whities as he bites his bottom lip.

CRASH.

Samuels begins to let out a loud yell but falls from his bed and slams his head on the floor before any words can escape. He jumps to his feet and pulls a .357 magnum from underneath his pillow and aims it towards his bedroom window.

Directly at Weapon:Ashen. Weapon:Ashen simply nods his head at Samuels and then sticks his head out of the broken window.

Samuels: “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. How in the hell did you get up here?”

Weapon:Ashen lurches slightly forward out the window, then begins quickly yanking at a sturdy white rope until the load at the other end slows it’s ascent.

Samuels: “Hey, freak! What in the Hell are you doing!?”

Weapon:Ashen: “There's nothing to worry about; just pulling up a corpse for safe keeping. It's ok, that's Theo Pryce down there. He said you'd be all for this."

Samuels sticks his head out the window and down and the shadowy figure standing outside his house.

Samuels: “Oh, hey Theo!”

Samuels smiles and waves his hand, which is met by just a ‘shhhh.’ Samuels backs away and begins to walk back to the bed.

Samuels: “Oh that Theo… Wait, a fucking corpse!? You can’t bring a dead body here! What if my neighbors see this? I’ve got a reputation to uphold, you know? I can’t just have some freak turning this into a morgue!”

With a final tug, the body comes through the window with a thud on the floor. Samuels shakes his head in disbelief and collapses onto the bed.

Samuels: “This is… you can’t do this.”

Weapon:Ashen: “The corpse says otherwise. Wait here. Theo’s at the door.”

Samuels: “This is a fucking dream right? Please tell me this is a dream. No, if this were a dream you’d be a hot, moist woman here to do a sexy reenactment of Clinton’s impeachment. This is a fucking Nightmare. I can’t handle this. I need a drink.”

Samuels places the pistol back underneath his pillow, and pulls out a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels. Samuels lets out a deep sigh and begins to guzzle as he waits for the two intruders to return.

From a distance Samuels' attention is caught by the sound of Ashen's voice.

Ashen: I already forget which door is his room. Let's try kicking this one open.

Pryce: It's probably the open door right down there where...

...but it's too late. Ashen is already kicking in whatever door was next to him as John peeks his head around the doorway of his room.

Samuels: What the hell do you think you're doing!? This way you nut job!

Ashen turns his attention toward John and offers a friendly nod with a big smile.

Ashen: Look who I found downstairs! I say the three of us all share some drinks and take turns raping that body before we do anything else... I mean it only makes sense if you think about it. Three of us... a dead whore with three waiting holes. Why not...

Theo Pryce just shakes his head as he makes his way over to Samuels' room. Ashen comes in behind him and has a big smile on his face.

Samuels: How are you so happy about this? What's the matter with you anyway?

Pryce: You'll get used to him. He is an interesting one to deal with.

Weapon:Ashen is already making his way over to the corpse and stripping its clothes off, ripping violently at her shirt and bra to fling them across the room before tossing her on the bed with her naked breasts flopping freely.

Ashen: Whoooooooooooooo! THE BEAST... IS... BACK!

Theo and Samuels aren't sure what to do as Ashen begins unbuckling his pants... well, Samuels knows what to do which is take a big ass drink! He hands something to Theo and he doesn't even waste time checking to see what it is before taking a swig. At a time like this it just doesn't matter.

Ashen: John Cable ain't got SHIT ON ME, BABY! HA!

Ashen reaches into his pants and slowly pulls out...

...

...

...

...

his penis. It's fully erect.

Samuels: For the love of...

Pryce: Give me that.

Theo takes the bottle from John and just starts chugging it. John and Theo both leave the bedroom as Ashen climbs on top of the exposed dead whore and slides his throbbing member between her still supple, sweet, soft breasts.

Ashen: Take it, whore! TAKE IT!

Theo and John can hear the mind numbing sounds but do their best to ignore them as they have a quick chat in the hallway...

Samuels: Alright, so what in the hell is going on? Do we need to shoot this guy? Nobody ever has to know a thing, Theo. It can be done.

Pryce: Oh I'd be lying if I said the thought didn't already cross my mind, but no we have a... agreement of sorts. We made a deal.

Samuels: You run around with him in the middle of the night killing women and bringing them to my house, and he gives you a wooden nickel? What kind of deal could possibly lead to what's going on right now on my sheets!?

Pryce: It's... complicated. He seems to think that if he...

Samuels: Come on! Spit it out!

Pryce: He thinks if he successfully rapes twenty women who have the same birthday that his, I guess wife? Yeah, his wife will come back from the dead and return to him. Seems legit.

Theo's eyes clearly revealing how nuts he knows that sounds.

Samuels: So which number whore is that in there? And why's she dead?

Theo takes a notepad out of his pocket and begins flipping through it. He does a double take and says...

Pryce: Son of a bitch.

Samuels: What?

Theo rushes back into the bedroom and

Pryce: OH MY GOD!

Rushes right back out almost crashing face first into Samuels in his haste.

Samuels: What? What's he doing in th... OH GOD!

Samuels peeked in just in time to see Ashen successully inserting the dead whores left hand into his own asshole! He somehow got a corpse to fist him! OH MY GOD IS RIGHT!

Samuels and Pryce walk away from the room as Theo explains what he just realized on his notes.

Pryce: Jesus, wow, anyway I just realized that corpse was number fourteen, and I also just remembered that the twenty was a safe guard in case something went wrong with the others.

Samuels: Are you telling me that since the last time you and I were in the same place together, you've since accompanied that raging lunatic on thirteen different, SUCCESSFUL rape missions?

Pryce: I'm afraid so... don't remind me, but the point is he said all he needed was thirteen and the rest were just extras.

Samuels grabs Theo's shirt collar and yanks him right up to his face and shouts with that aroma of hard liquor hitting Theo's nostrils hard.

Samuels: Then why the hell are you guys in my house and why is he stuffing half of a corpse's hand up his ass on my bed when I was having a perfectly peaceful dream about, about... nevermind what about!

Pryce: One of us needs to go in there and tell him the job is already done, and then we need to get rid of that body. Did the XWF set up cameras in your house too for their attempt at 24/7 invasion of privacy for the sake of good promos and bonus footage? We CAN NOT allow this to end up on some bonus disc, John.

Samuels: Yeah, uh, I think I know where they're all hidden. Let's see...

Pryce and Samuels start wandering throughout the house looking for cameras, the first one they find is hidden under the rim of a toilet bowl on the first floor.

Samuels: That's kind of gross, who wants to watch videos of a man shitting?

Pryce: John Madison.

Samuels: Fair point.

The two continue on their journey finding cameras in all kinds of odd locations, in the middle of an Old Grandfather Clock, one hanging from a chandelier, even one neatly placed in the refrigerator.

Samuels: Here's one.

Samuels reaches up and pulls out out of the light fixture above the shower.

Pryce: How Bangbros of them.

Samuels: I was thinking the same thing.

Theo finds two cameras placed at opposite ends of the main entry way while Samuels finds one hidden in an old statue at the end of the hallway.

Samuels: How many you got so far?

Pryce: A dozen, you?

Samuels: Two.

Pryce: Thanks for doing your part.

Samuels: I'm just here for moral support.

Pryce: And what a wonderful job you are doing of that. Come on, let's go get that crazy bastard and tell him the job is done. Hopefully he's already finished having his "way" with the body...

Pryce and Samuels go back upstairs to the main bedroom where the sight before them is enough to make a normal person dry heave, however at this point their journey with Ashen has already opened their eyes to the more twisted side of humanity. Laying in the bed before them is a sound asleep Weapon:Ashen. Next to him is the body of the dead whore, which has since been stabbed repeatedly since they last saw it. And as if that wasn't enough, the woman's eyes have been ripped out and placed upon a pillow as if they were the little mints you find in your hotel room.

Pryce: Well go ahead, wake him up.

Samuels: Me? Why me?

Pryce: Because I'm the team Captain and I am delegating. So get to it.

Samuels: Sure, now you want to be a Captain.

Pryce: What's that supposed to mean?

Samuels: Nothing. I'll handle this.

Samuels walks over to the still passed out Ashen and pokes him...once...twice...three times but Ashen doesn't budge. Ashen starts turning his head back and forth in his sleep and says something that sounds like "I'm coming..." His arms twitch and one of his hands is scratching at the bed sheets a little as he remains asleep.

John looks over at Theo as if to say "What now?" Theo looks around the room and spots a dust covered object on the desk, he picks up the object and throws it at Ashen, hitting him in on the right side, a decision that proves to be the correct one as the impact wakes Ashen instantaneously.

Ashen: NO!!!!!!!!!!!! Not HERE! Not NOW!!!!!! Who dares wake me from my slumber?

Pryce: Me. We've got the cameras and in addition the body that lays next to you was your 14th victim. Remember you only needed THIRTEEN, which we actually succeeded in reaching before we came across this woman and you decided to murder her in cold blood.

Ashen: 14 you say? That is extremely welcomed news. I guess you and I BOTH got a little carried away with how much fun it was finding those women and having you stand guard while I violated their precious holes. I can definitely undersand how we both lost count... HELL, I WOULD GLADLY KEEP GOING TO ALL TWENTY!

Pryce: That really won't be necessary and now that we've established that I've already helped you with what I was expected to help you with, can we get a move on?

Ashen: I'm ready to head out. Did you guys need me for anything else? I've got a bride to find! The raping of the thirteenth whore should have already started the awakening process... it must be why while I was laying there on the bed, I actually was able to dream that I yanked her beautiful body from the depth of this cold, dead planet. She's free... SHE IS ALIVE!!!

Weapon:Ashen quickly shoves Theo and John out of his way and darts down the steps and flies out of the front door like a bat out of hell, screaming: "Vanessaaaaa! Come to me!!! HA HA HA!"

Pryce and Samuels just look at each other for a second.

Pryce: O... k.. then. Um...

He looks over at the mutilated body that Ashen left for them to deal with.

Pryce: Did you need my assistance at all or can I get back to...

But John immediately interrupts.

Samuels: Oh no. You helped him get to my place and helped put me in this mess. You're going to help clean it up.

Pryce: Do you have a plan?

Samuels: I do, actually...

John rubs his chin and actually starts to look very amused right now.

Pryce: I'm glad somebody's having fun. What's the plan?

Samuels: Well there's this union boss I've been having some... troubles with. I think this is the perfect time to send a little gift his way to thank him. The construction yard actually isn't too far from here. This will be a quick job.

John quickly gathers some supplies such as rubber gloves, some bags, some duct tape and some other odds and ends.

Samuels: This is going to be great.

Theo sighs, closes his eyes for a second and then starts helping John get the body into the large garbage bag.

Pryce: I just hope we found all those hidden cameras. You don't think they'd put any in this room, do you?

Samuels: I had asked them not to but it IS the XWF after all. At this stage if they did hide a cam in here it's a little too late to worry about it. Let's get this done with and we'll cover our asses later if any questions come up. This isn't my first rodeo.

And just a few short hours later, it was like none of this had ever happened and all evidence of such an event had been properly disposed of... except of course for the camera they missed.

Believe in the lie, live in disbelief, and trust only in none