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~~Mia Dim~~ · (03-10-2014)

It's a pleasant day in Amarillo, allowing a man to lay out on his hammock and tan in the sun. The Dimallisher is sleeping in his, fingers interlocked behind his head, with his eyes shut. He's probably dreaming about wrapping some chains around one of those

on Team Price and dragging them down to the ring at WWX. Or maybe he's dreaming about the love of his life; Sandy Smith-- the most beautiful woman walking God's green earth. She's also the woman who happens to be carrying The Dimallisher's unborn child.

The XWF superstars can only wish that they had a woman as sexy and intelligent as Sandy. Sadly, they'll have to settle for jerking off in their bed sheets. And the sluts of the XWF can only hope to be as beautiful as her some day. Keep dreaming, ladies. That's right, there is no woman in the XWF that comes close. Sandy is getting offers left and right for various things. Everyone in the locker room wants to sleep with her, but sadly, they cannot have her!

And coming this spring, Sandy will be the first XWF diva to pose nude for Playboy!

How many other divas can boast about something like that?

Yes, The Dimallisher is getting a hard on as he lays there on his hammock thinking about all three hundred pounds of his woman being put on display in the dirty magazine.

His hand begins to creep down his hairy chest, down past his navel, and towards the waistband of his jeans.

It's about to get real interesting until suddenly, SPLAT! A fucking water balloon nails him in the crotch from across the yard.

"Son of a bitch!"

The Dimallisher jolts up from his hammock and at that moment, half a dozen of his nieces and nephews scatter across the yard. He looks down at the crotch of his pants and it's soaked from that damn water balloon!

"Which one of you little jackasses hit me with the God damn water balloon?"

The children giggle as they hide in their playhouse. The playhouse probably has a 4 foot clearance and is big enough to fit all six of the youngsters.

"Oh that's real funny! I'm out here trying to relax in preparation of my match and you kids are playin' games."

The Dimallisher walks up to the playhouse and kicks the side of it with his bare foot. The little boys and girls scream from inside at the loud thud.

"Haha! It ain't so funny now. You kids got nowhere to run! Just like them group of jackasses and queers on Team Theo. We got them

trapped with nowhere to run and nowhere to hide! We're gonna smoke them boys out at World War X, and Sid Feder's gonna be there with his Glock, firing rounds at whoever comes crawling out the doorway. Allow me to provide a demonstration of what I'm talkin' about!"

The Dimallisher walks over to his barn where he has a gasoline can waiting. He grabs the can of gasoline and walks back to the occupied playhouse with a demented look on his face. The man has become unhinged!

The Dimallisher raises the can of gasoline over the playhouse, tilts it, and begins to pour it all over!

"Haha! You're all soaked in gasoline now. That's right, I'm gonna teach you little jackasses a lesson!"

Once The Dimallisher is finished, he throws the empty gas can into the direction of the barn where he acquired it. The playhouse full of Dimallisher's nieces and nephews is now dripping with gasoline!

"You kids are a bunch of little

anyway! Eat shit, you little

!"

Dimallisher lights his cigarette, takes a single drag, and then goes to place the cherry of the cigarette onto the gas covered roof of the playhouse. It's at this point when the children inside decide to give up on their little stakeout and come running out of the playhouse, screaming.

"Hahahaha!"

Dimallisher looks like he just fucked his wife after threatening the lives of these little kids as he watches them run away. He rolls the cigarette across the roof of the playhouse and it doesn't take long for it to catch on fire. Dimallisher walks up to one of the little girls who tripped on her dress and fell face-first. He places his boot on the back of her skull and slowly begins to shift all of his weight down onto that foot.

"This little princess right here is that little

spaceman, Mr. Supernova. That little queer's gonna walk out there in his stupid dress, and I'm gonna crush his skull into the mat!"

All of a sudden, Dimallisher's manager, Jimmy TINGS! comes running out to see what all the commotion is.

"DAVE! What the hell are you doing to Alice?!"

Dimallisher removes his foot from the little girl's head. She lifts her head off the ground, and we see that her face is covered in tears, snot, and dirt as Jimmy helps her up.

"What? Nothin'! We're just playing some games out here, Jimmy!"

"Games? You almost crushed Alice's head on my lawn! And why is the playhouse on fire?!"

"We were playing fireman, Jimmy!"

"Really? Because it looks like you might have been trying to cut a promo and went a tad bit overboard with it. Fuck, Dave. What did I tell you about cutting promos without my supervision? You know you can't control yourself, especially ever since you got trained by Bill Goldberg."

"Maybe there was a little speech in there that had somethin' to do with my match, but I promise I was just showing the kids how to escape a burning house. You can never get enough fire drills in is what I'm sayin'. Do you want your kids to burn to death, or do you want them to be safe?! Let me protect the children, Jimmy!"

"Fine, but please put the fire out, and don't step on my kids like they're bugs!"

"Got it!"

Dimallisher smiles as Jimmy turns his back to carry his daughter inside the house and clean her up. The little girl looks up at Dimallisher with her chin on Jimmy's shoulder. Dimallisher makes eye contact with her and smiles. He then pulls out a hunting knife and waves it in her direction, scaring the shit out of her.

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