Being the longest running Universal Champion in XWF history, Morbid Angel makes himself a bit scarce after getting robbed of his gold by the infamous hack Eli James. Then history is intertwined, past and future…Morbid Angel fighting on a show against the man who lost the Universal Championship to him. Morbid Angel intends to make it a second time victory! Eli James is having a match against Shades…wouldn’t it be hilarious if someone gave Morbid Angel a briefcase? Wouldn’t that be the god damnedest thing?
After the match where he was robbed of his title, Morbid Angel went home and pondered what to do next with everything going on…should he continue? Maybe it is that time to hang up the jockstrap and call it what it is…RETIREMENT!
A little known fact is that he came out of retirement to join the XWF but age took its toll on him as he needed more steroids than before which turned him into a GOD among men! Standing at a near 7ft and a whopping 450lbs, he was once the biggest person in the XWF until the current Monolith beat him out on size. Morbid Angel is still the only man here that would make Charles Atlas cry with the size of his many muscles. Even going as far as to brag about injecting into his own penis! I mean, who does that stuff?…Morbid fucking Angel! That’s who! He is proud of his penis injections! With a dick strong enough to hold the weight of Barney Green and 3 other fighters! Even his cock has the muscles of a god…with that in mind, I should remind you of his heart condition. After suffering 3 major heart attacks he was forced to see a doctor about what was causing the issues…or die. At that time he was told that his heart can bench 50lbs which for a heart is a ridiculous amount of weight! The heart being a muscle also received the glory of the muscle juice and reaped the rewards but not as Morbid would have hoped. In the end everyone must die…and that’s what happened…
Shortly after losing his title…Morbid Angel died of a massive heart attack. He was found two days after the show in his prized Lincoln Navigator with one hand still clenched to his chest and a look of discomfort across his face. The XWF decided to ignore the news of his death because of the fear it would bring down the roster and cause a huge outcry for anti-steroids and Jesus Christ worship. Some things Shane will never let happen! Never will a Jesus Christ rule the XWF! Not while he lives! Just try and nail a mother fucker like Shane to a cross! He will fuck you up!…or just get nailed to the cross and curse your whore of a mother’s name.
The Autopsy of Morbid Angel lasted only a few hours. It was obvious that it was a heart attack from years of steroid abuse. In the end…Morbid Angel was laid to rest behind his house in Morbidonia where many of the XWF superstars came to pay their respects to their fallen friend.
The day was a sunny day, I guess the gods were happy to see the demon die after so many years of pain and torture of his fellow man. Everyone that gave a damn was there…including his son, Xerces!
Xerces who was about to turn 12 and was estranged from Morbid Angel for the better half of the year after the state took him believing that Morbid was using him as a slave…mainly because of the homosexual rumors surrounding his son and how mean he gets to everyone around him…it was never proven but Morbid let them take the boy…who fucking wants to deal with that kind of liability? Not him! The evilest man on the planet with a son that has rumors floating around about having more dicks in his face than teeth…just won’t do! He has a reputation to uphold! At least in his will he left everything to his son to make amends for everything…too bad the state took that shit because he was only 12 and someone needed to pay for the boy! HA!…government…
Peter Gilmour, who was still upset from his loss against Christian Gun…angrily storms to the podium by the grave of the one…the only…MORBID ANGEL!
Peter Gilmour-”I have known Kyril for a little while! He was a prick! I did this fucking trios shit with him and he just sat there fucking jerking is cock to the Universal Title instead of helping me and Cain win…I mean, what the fuck is that shit? I could have choked him with a frozen piece of shit! Then he fucking slaps me in the fucking face! After all I tried to do was help him! I forgave him for that shit but every chance he gets he fucking puts one over on me! I saved his fucking life just before the match and he never even said thank you! That ungrateful son of a bitch! You know what? I am glad he is dead! The world is better off without a cock smoking prick like Morbid Angel hanging around making shit harder on us actual competitors here. He fucking built himself up so much that all he needs to do is mention he wants a match and he gets fucking title shots and main eventing shit! How is that fair to everyone else? I bust my ass off to get here and I couldn’t get a fucking universal title shot. I FUCKING EARNED IT!
Morbid Angel was a shit wrestler, a shit father and he made almost no sense when he spoke. All the shit talking and the crazy blathering came from him like shit from a horse’s ass! Worthless!…AND YOU!…”
Peter points his finger at Xerces with a furiously enraged face.
Peter Gilmour-”You have some tiny, prepubescent but rather large for your age BALLS! Showing up here! CHRISTIAN GUNN! NO ONE CAN SAVE YOU NOW!”
Peter lunges at Xerces who squeals like a fucking girl and runs behind the casket and as Peter began to give chase…the one…the only…Shane "" Anonistrator steps in. He puts his hand on Peter’s shoulder.
Shane -” It’s OK Peter. Sometimes children can get under our skin. Have a potato.”
Shane pulls a Potato from his ANAL PASSAGE and offers it to Peter who scowls at him as little bits of shit drip off of it.
Peter Gilmour-”I don’t want a fucking potato! I want Christian Gun to fucking die!”
Shane puts the potato back in his ANAL PASSAGE.
Shane -”Well, then…Sit the fuck down you silly little waggle bagga!”
Peter points at Xerces before turning away and taking a seat.
Shane gets up to the podium so say his part for his fallen employee.
Shane -”I remember a man who came crawling to me, begging for a job because he had nothing and I offered him something that had the possibilities to change his life. Something that everyone could want. In the end…Morbid was one of those shits that need the entire goddamn role of toilet paper to clean away! There's NO way you could fit him into just one condom, either. And I couldn’t fire him so I guess death was the best way to detach from someone who wastes my time…and potatoes...and asparagus.”
A man whispers in Shane’s ear and his face turns from smug to a look of disappointment.
Shane -”Not the same guy?”
Man-”Morbid Angel.”
Shane -”Oh, SHIT! Morbid Angel died?! What the fuck?!”
Shane pulls the potato from his ANAL PASSAGE and takes a bite as if he was trying to gain power from it.
Shane -”Morbid Angel is a fucking asshole! He is a closeted homosexual who I once caught trying to steal my ENTIRE load of potatoes and asparagus by shoving them up his penis hole. How does a penis hole get that stretched? Other than that….Morbid Angel was a Multi Ark Champion, one time Heavy Metal Champion, two time Xtreme Champion and longest raining Universal Champion. He never stopped raining! All of which he sucked at. His son should hide his face in shame! The saddest part was that I lose money because that fat bastard sells!"
Shane turns around and throws the potato at the casket before walking away.
But wait! He comes rushing back and collects the potato, then walking away. Smart man! Potatoes aren't free.
LH Harrison takes stage in front of the small gathering of people…looks more like a midnight release of Magic Mike instead of a funeral.
Harrison is known for being the moral compass of the XWF and would not miss out on his chance to do a good deed for the one known as Morbid Angel!
LH Harrison-”I can’t say I knew him well, he was a strong fighter and I know that he loved to fight. Though on the outside he seemed hardened and evil but on the inside he was a good man. In passing he told me of a dream match he wanted to have…it was shortly before he tried to bite my ear off because I stood too close to him. His English is not so good and I should have respected the one foot rule when dealing with Russians.
Anyway, he told me that his dream match would be a Zombie Death Match with Jessica Diaz as guest Referee and that something needed to be on fire and he didn’t care if it was Diaz’s panties! Can you just imagine that match? Morbid Angel vs. some poor soul fighting each other and a zombie horde while racing through an abandoned town with Jessica Diaz screaming as her vagina burns up. Does it have to be her panties? I have no idea. Was he serious?…probably…he was the Morbid Angel. May god great him as a friend.”
As LH Harrison stepped away from the podium he raises his fist in the air and screams to the sky
LH Harrison-”VICTORY FOREVER!”
A man that we all have seen before walks slowly from the back and up in front of everyone. The Satanic High Priest!
He pulls out a scroll that was old and tattered and begins to read from the worn parchment
The Satanic High Priest-”
Arise! Arise! Go far away! Go far away!
Be Unholy! Be Superior! Flee! Flee!
Turn around, go, arise and go far away!
Your wickedness may rise to heaven like unto smoke!
Arise and leave this body!
From this body, depart in Satan‘s name!
From this body flee!
Turn away from this body!
Go away from this body!
Do not return to this body!
Do not come near this body!
Do not approach this body!
Do not throng around this body!
Be commanded by Azazel the Mighty!
Be commanded by Lucifer, Lord of All!
Be commanded by Marduk, the Great Magician of the Gods!
Be commanded by the God of Fire, the worldly Destroyer!
May you be held back from human body!
May the gods never overpower you!
May the gods never hold you back!
May the gods never conquer you!
May the gods frighten you!
May the gods shake to their core in sight of you!
May the gods fear you!
No god will surpass you!
Let it be known, Satan is now among the living!
Evil shall never die as long as God is now one!
I Invoke Abyzou, Asag, Belphegor, Pontianak and Lamashtu!
Rape the gates of heaven and destroy he who is false!
Return the one known as Morbid Angel to his place!
Morbid Angel is GOD!
PRAY UNTO HIM!”
The sky quickly went black and the earth shook like an earth quake set forth to kill everyone! The casket falls deep into the earth
The lid bursts from the coffin and Morbid Angel raises into the air like a demonic Jesus!
Morbid Angel-”I have…RETURNED!...BOW TO ME!
The scene fades to a Blood Red!
(Stips in LH Harrison's bit. Thank you to everyone who allowed me to use their character. Peter Gilmour, Shane , LH Harrison. )
болезненное ангел!
Intercontinental Champion
TRIO CHAMPION x2
UNIVERSAL CHAMPION x2
UFO Champion x2
Ark Champion x2
Heavy Metal Champion x2
Xtreme Champion x3
Won at War Games 2014
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to a cross! He will fuck you up!…or just get nailed to the cross and curse your whore of a mother’s name. ![[Image: ghost-bc_featured.jpg]](http://rockrevoltmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/ghost-bc_featured.jpg)
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