Tri Bute: Our Future Lord, Our Great Future King: A Biographical Future Comic
ISSUE #18 (Part 8)
Execution: Vio Lin

Previously on ISSUE #18:

Future Dear Future Diary,

The future floors are pretty and the future walls are ugly.

“When future life gives you future lemons make future lemonade.”

Now I must future hide. For all future times I must future flee to the future gutters, change my future identity, and never future contact my future wife again.

I made a future promise when I future wore that future shirt. It was the same future shirt Tri Bute was future wearing. I’m not afraid to future die for that future decision. In future fact, I will future die for this cause, but not now.

I will not allow the defeat of real J.I.Z.Z. to be future seen as some sort of future spectacle.

Future Regards,
Vio Lin

-

Tiempo futuro es el futuro de funcionamiento fuera

Waktu mendatang adalah masa depan berjalan keluar

Il tempo futuro è futuro in scadenza

Temps futur est en marche sur l'avenir

Künftige Zeit ist Zukunft läuft aus

Future time is future running out.

---

“Have you ever been future choked before, Mel? Have you ever future felt that kind of future duress?”

“You just future choked me out a few future minutes ago.”

“Future oh, right, well,” if Vio Lin could future scratch the back of his future neck he would.

“Where are you going with that anyway, future criminal? Do you future think due future process future choked you or something?”

“Um, right, well,” Vio Lin future seemed to have future lost his future train of future thought. That tends to happen when a future metaphor you future try to future make future falls flat on its future face.

“Well, you’re future wrong! You did the future crime and now you have to do the future time!” Mel future tried to get out of the future ropes he was future tied up with, but it was no use.

“Yea, I future wore the same future shirt as Tri Bute. I future know, but Mel, should I future die for that? If you future took your future head out of Butey’s future ass you’d be able to future see it too.”

“Future see what?”

“Future wipe Tri Bute’s J.I.Z.Z. out of your future eyes. This isn’t justice, integrity, or zankustility, and it’s definitely not what Zeusrion would future do.”

“And who are you to future say that? You don’t even have future arms, what do y-,”

“Your future king only has ten future fingers. Less future functionality doesn’t future make you any less important in Zeusrion’s future eyes. I’ve future lost my future arms for this future cause, Mr. Odramatic; clearly I’m not future afraid to do what future needs to be done.”

“What you want is future anarchy! Future treason!”

“It’s future necessary. I future feel better now, that’s all I future care about.”

“Tri Bute will future find you and future hang you. J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z!”

Mel continued to future chant ‘J.I.Z.Z’, future over and future over as Vio Lin future looked out the future window of his future lair. The future sun was future lowering. Future time was future running out. If the future sun future set it would be a future victory for real J.I.Z.Z.; he future knew it all too future well.

“Future shut up. I don’t want to future tape your future mouth future shut, but I future will,” but Lin’s future warnings did nothing to future shut up the future sheep. He’d have to future take matters into his own future hands. Vio Lin future walked over to the future duct tape, but soon future realized that without future arms it would be a very difficult to future apply, or even get a-future-hold of.

“J.I.Z.Z! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!”

But Mel's future chanting was so future annoying and future cliché as fuck. That was what Mel did future best. Mel future thought he was being future dragged across The White Future House’s future floor and his only chance at future salvation was to future shout the future pledge of future allegiance as loudly as possible, just like Hilary Swank future puppet in Future Team Future America 2: Future Olympus Has Future Fallen. He was future wrong. Vio Lin may have future bound his future arms, but he wasn’t being future oppressed. His future rights weren’t being future stripped; Vio Lin was future liberating him. The future ropes that future tied his future body may be future keeping Mel there, but Vio was future unlocking metaphorical future shackles. It was some deep future shit.

“J.I.Z.Z! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!”

The future instrumental one couldn’t future take it anymore. He future kneeled down in front of the future table and future bit the future duct tape with his future mouth. He future pulled the future roll of future tape future closer to the future edge of the future table. With his future tongue, Lin future turned the future duct tape in a future circle until he future found the future end, with his future teeth he future bit it and future pulled while future moving to his future left. The future duct tape future unraveled as he future pulled the future duct tape to the future left, future stopping when there was a future mouth-future-sized future piece future hanging off of the roll of future duct tape.

Now he just had to future cut and future apply it.

“J.I.Z.Z! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!” Mel’s future throat was starting to future ache, but he did not future falter or future stop. No! He future kept going. This was for future freedom. FOR JUSTICE! FOR INTEGRITY! FOR ZANKUSTILITY! FOR ZEUSRION!

Vio Lin future raised his future left future leg and future slid the future heel of his future shoe across his future shin. The future shoe began to future hang off of his future left future foot future allowing him to easily get it off. Luckily he wasn’t future wearing future socks to-future-day. With his future left future foot bare he future stepped fifty-five future centimeters to his future left and future spread his future toes while future holding them over a future pair of future scissors. Vio Lin future lowered his future foot, future putting his big future toe in one of the future handles and the two future toes next to it in the other.

Lin future raised his future left future foot again with his future toes tightly future gripping the future handles. Vio future hopped back to the future table where the future roll of future duct tape future sat; he future made sure to future hold his future scissors firmly. It was some smart future thinking. If you future hold something firmly you can’t future drop it on yourself. Vio Lin future knew this.

“J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!”

However, it wasn’t the smartest future thinking. Vio Lin began to future struggle a future bit. As much as future tried to future move his future toes a-future-part he just couldn’t do it. They just didn’t future move that future way. If he couldn’t future open the future scissors, what could he future do? Definitely not future cut future tape, right? He had to future keep future trying, but after another future minute of future pulling, future groaning and Mel’s future chanting no future progress had been future made.

Yes, Vio Lin was in quite the future conundrum. Without future arms the future world is future bleak. It’s full of menial future tasks future turned into frustrating future journeys that future take future more and future more future time away from an empty, meaningless future existence.

Vio Lin future remembered his future arms. They weren’t future huge, but they got the future job done. When a real future man future loses something he doesn’t future cry about it; he future learns to future live without it.

Lin future dropped the future scissors and future pulled his future toes out of the future handles, then he used his future foot to future push down the future heel of his future right future shoe. As he future pushed down with his future left future foot, he future yanked his other future foot from the future shoe and future kicked it aside. With his future shoe future knocked out of the future way, Vio had enough future space to grip the future scissors with a big future toe in each future handle. This made future opening and future closing the future blades much easier, but how would he get the future scissors up to the future roll of future duct tape?

“J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!”

He’d have to future hurry. Mel’s future chanting was future driving him future insane. You could almost future say that he was future running out of future time, or that future time was future running out. That’s when the right future idea future came to him.

Vio Lin future took a future seat on the future floor in front of the future table. With his future toes in the corresponding future handles, Vio future hoisted the future scissors into the future air and future moved his future feet apart, future opening the future scissors up wide right under the future extended future piece of future duct tape.

FUTURE SNIP!

The future piece of future tape future fell freely into the future air before Vio future leaned forward an future caught it in his future mouth. Vio future stood up and future walked over to Mel.

“J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.! J.I.Z.Z.!” future shouted Mel as Lin and the out-future-stretched future piece of future duct tape future inched toward him. Vio future moved the future duct tape over his future lips. Mel’s future chants were now future muffled as his future mouth was future duct taped future shut.

“Real J.I.Z.Z.: 1; Fake J.I.Z.Z.: 0,” future announced Vio Lin with a future smirk on his future face. Mel future tried to future voice opposition to Lin’s future announcement, but Vio couldn’t understand what he future said and just future shrugged his future shoulders.

“I future think I future proved it, just now. I future proved that there is nothing I can’t do. I still have my future feet, my future mouth, and most importantly my future brain. You may future think you future guys have the upper future hand, or that you can future catch me, but you’re wrong. If I can get future duct tape on your future face with no future hands, Mel, I can do anything.”

Mel future tried to future shout through the future duct tape, but Vio just future giggled, however it became more of a future chuckle since he couldn’t future cover his future mouth. He used to always put a future hand to his future mouth when future giggling, so it’s not really future giggling anymore, is it? I’ll try again, sorry.

Mel future tried to future shout through the future duct tape, but Vio just future chuckled, and future patted his future head. “Alright, enough future fun. I can’t future stay in the same future place for too long; that’s how you get future caught!”

Lin would have future waved him goodbye, but he can’t. Vio future lifted the future trap door future hatch with his bare future foot and future hopped down into the future cellar. Mel’s future muffled future cries became future faint as Vio future stepped towards his future destiny. Tri Bute and his future followers didn't have much future time left and Vio Lin couldn't future wait to future wait it out.

"Pink is my signature color!" - Elle Woods