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Scully's Home
Miami, Florida

We're here in Miami, Florida where the outside weather has no effect on what's happening inside of the XWF'S Universal Champion, Scullys home. Scully was indeed at his home, his miss, Natalie had popped out with her mother and little Alfie. Skull wasn't all by himself though, he had company, his good friend Alfie was also there.
Scully was in his gym which is located in his garage. He is wearing some black adidas joggers and a woman beater vest, not that he ever beat women. He was doing some pull ups on a bar, after about fifty of them, he then moves to a punch bag where he hits it hard with combo's. Left jab, left jab, right jab, right hook and a uppercut. He is intense and repeatedly hitting the bag until Alfie enters the gym with laptop in hand. Scully hits the bag a few more times before stopping his workout.

"Scully, you wouldn't guess what I've come across whilst surfing the web?"

"Not gay porn is it?"

"No, it's Barney Green."

"What about him?"

"I found some nude pics of him."

"Say what?!"

Alfie brings the laptop over to Scully and shows him the screen. Skull looks at it once then looks again.

Scully looks at Alfie.

"Fairplay to the nob, smiling and not giving a fuck about what people will say about his weight. The guy has balls!"

"Balls maybe. Dick no!"

"What?"

Alfie then uses the curser to click on to the next picture.
Scully shakes his head in disapproval as Alfie bursts out laughing.

"Did you see it?"

"See what?!"

"It's so tiny and cute. You're mean for beating this guy up. He seems real nice."

"Hey, I didn't make the God damn match. You wanna bum him do you? I'm sure if you put a ladies wig on he'd bum you."

"No I don't, I'm just saying he seems like a nice guy."

"He's a nice guy? But he's trying to be a tough guy? Is that what you're saying? The Brooklyn Brawler.. Boston Brawler whatever, is trying to get all loco, want to be this crazy motherfucker? He doesn't want me to take him lightly? Huh? Funny that, how can you take someone lightly who is that big? When you threaten Scully, when you try to beat the fuck out of Scully, you become a victim of Scully."

"I was just saying he seems real nice. Why you getting all shitty with me?"

Scully sighs and takes a deep breath.

"Soz man. Just since I won the Uni and I haven't had a match, people have been questioning me. People are saying that I am not a real Champion. I worked fuckin' hard for this title!"

"I thought you didn't care about what people think? You defeated Loverboy Vinnie Lane when no one else would even fight him. You are the champ Skull, you earnt it and you have it.."

"You're right, Alfie. Fuck em all. Fuck the haters, they can go and swivel. Do you know what I actually like being a fuckin' Cunt, I like being me!"

"That's more like it, Skull. Now why don't you let some of that energy out in a promo? Tell Barney Green and the world what you think?"

Scullys ringtone goes off to tell him he has an notification. He looks at his Samsung Galaxy S7 and reads the tweet he just received from a fan.

"That Michael Scully guy has tweeted me again. This is what happens when you reply to someone first time round."

"You put his vid on the XWF website didn't you? And you gave him credit for the promo he did on Barney, which was quite funny. You even said you liked his cat. It's weird how you both have the same name and you're both from Birmingham. In fact it's hilarious"

"Is it really? He seemed cool. I suppose having another fan to add to my enourmous list isn't too bad right? He just seems a little obsessed. He found me on Facebook too and wrote me a DM yesterday. He used the lyrics from Stan."

"Read it out to me, go on."

Scully opens his Facebook app on his phone and then uses his thumb to select messenger. He opens the message and then reads it or should we say raps it out loud.

Dear Skull, I wrote to you but you still ain't callin'
I left my mobile, my email, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two tweets back on Saturday, you must a got 'em
There might have been a problem with your net or somethin'
Sometimes I forget messages I've wrote so I check 'em
But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's your son?
My girlfriend's had three babies now, are you just going to have one?
I love being a dad but it's tight with money,
But my kids make me laugh, their so funny.
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I'm your biggest fan
I even got the shit you did at TXW, it's at my nans,
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did against Vinnie too, that shit was fat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Michael Scully not Stan!"

"To be fair that wasn't bad. In fact it was quite good."

"I know dude. Anyway let's go and toast Barney."

Alfie goes to get his camera equipment whilst Scully has a drink of mineral water. Alfie returns a couple of minutes late with equipment in hand...

---

"Wassup XWF Galaxy, it is me the ruler of the Xtreme Wrestling Federation and your XWF Uni-on Champion of the world, Scully. Behold, I have my first match since I dethroned that bleached haired, ass bandit, Vinnie Lane and shocked the world. I wasn't suprised, I wasn't shocked, I knew I was going to win, I wasn't about to give up my first Uni title shot, nah. I fought for my spot when I owned the gauntlet, I earnt my shot and straight up shot Vinnie Lane in da fuckin' head to become your new XWF Uni-on Champion.

Now I know what some of you are saying, why haven't I fought since I beat Vinnie? The answer is simple, I'm not going to be robbed of my title that I won in a competitive ladder match against the now ex champion, who held the Championship for nearly a year for Unknown Briefcase Wanker to run down to the ring with his little 24/7 case and try to steal my title in a cowardly way. I
destroy some loser on Savage or Warfare then cockbreath runs down and tries to cash in? Nah. I don't think so.. Soldier was meant to face me for my title in a one on one brawl but nope he's a chicken shit. He was meant use the briefcase in order to face me for the XWF'S biggest prize but he would rather team up with the doc and try to win the tag titles? Wow... He is a pussy. A hairy, fishy, dirty pussy just like his mom's snatch. He is quick enough to run his mouth when I tried to find a worthy challenger by auctioning a title shot, what happened to that? Dredzin won the auction but he didn't pay so he gets fuck all.

Since Vinnie got his beating in honour of his recently deceased mom. Since I became the XWF Uni-on Champion, I tried to auction off a title shot and ask Kandi if I could rape her, I am proud to be one of the most hated and despised individuals around. Do you actually think I wanted to rape Kandi? Nah. It was something I was paid to do, ask her if I could rape her. No harm in asking right? Like I would actually put my python in that diseased ridden hole, I don't think so. Barney fuckin' Green which sounds better than Peter fuckin' Gilmour, raped her though didn't he?! Live on TV, he shoved his weener in her. Hurray for Barney. Now I must face Barney, one on one in a Street Fight on Saturday Night Savage. I have been itching to step foot in the ring, waiting patiently for an event where I am not robbed. If he beats me which is highly unlikely, I think he does deserve a title shot. No doubt about it, if he pulls of a miracle and somehow defeats me, he should get a XWF Uni-on Championship match..

Everyone is mentioning me, talking about how they will one day grow some testicles and face me for my beautiful championship. I've heard Soldier the briefcase wanker, Doc sucks cock, Gillyflower, even Ghost Wank say they will one day take the title from me. I think the XWF has a case of delusional syndrome which has plagued some of these losers. Hell, Barney Green believes he will one day challenge for the XWF Uni-on Championship. Well Barney have I got news for you...

Firstly, a fan of Scully who even has the same name as me, owned you in that promo. His black and white cat owned you in that video. Secondly, when I've finished beating you to a bloody pulp to your fans dismay, do not blame me, blame the XWF for putting you in this match. This is suicide for you. Thirdly, it was nice knowing you!

Barney Green your two match unbeaten run will come to a bitter end and you will once again be sure to receive a reality check, compliments of yours truly. I'm the fuckin' owner of this joint, I have the biggest title, I own Vinnie Lane. I am the General not Frodo. I am Scully, who is not a Morbid God, but the God of all God's. I'm the fuckin' King around here not D'ville, he is a peasant. I am the sergeant who puts the Unknown Soldier in his place. I am the one who you all bow down too and you can suck my balls, Gilmour doesn't have a dick worth sucking for all you queers out there. I am the Birmingham Brawler, who makes Boston look like a place full of pansies. I am Scully and I am your fuckin' XWF Uni-on Champion. Da end, Scully has spoken!"