"Hello Rioters!" Alexis Riot smiles in front of the camera in the same way she did in her first promo, although this time she has a scar on her right cheek. Once again the whole segment is filmed in an amateur, V-log style.

"For those who didn't see the last video and still don't know who I am, I'm Alexis Riot, your current X-Treme Champion," She then glares at the camera,

"Like it or not,"

The smile returns to her face as she continues to talk,

"Now the last time I made a video, I exposed the blatant lies and hypocrisy of a certain man known as Austin Fernando, who would release more bullshit statements in a response to my response that I would in turn respond to and then would once again release more BS in a response to my response to his response to my response to the original bullshit he spewed from his original promo!"

Alexis then falls back onto a nearby chair, feigning tiredness,

"You know Rioters, this isn't an easy job. Sorting through all the lies and falsehoods and finding proof to prove them wrong, it really takes a lot out of a person. I wish there was somebody who would help me out with sorting through all the deceit and shit that Fernando and Luca pull out of their asses!" Alexis then widens her eyes, "Wait a second guys, I'll be right back!"

Alexis then quickly goes off screen, as though she was going to get something. Murmuring is heard in the distance, this "something" might be a someone! Alexis then is back on screen, but is also pulling someone by the arm to join her. Suddenly, a balding, chubby, middle aged man with a bushy mustache appears on the screen next to Alexis!

"I'm back guys, and I brought company! You see folks this guy right here is... what's your name again?"

The man looks at Riot confused, "Umm, Marco,"

"This guy right here is Marco the plumber! So Marco, do you know why I brought you here?"

"To fix a clogged toilet?" Marco then adds under his breath, "This better not be a porno. I'm married with two children."

"Oh no, no, no my friend!" Alexis laughs, "I brought you here to help me with the shit that has been spewing out of the mouths of Austin Fernando and his partner!"

The man continues to look bewildered, "Um, you called me over to see if I could help out with a clogged toilet."

"Well sir, you see, I kind of lied. I just brought you here for this one little joke for my promo for a match at Warfare,"

The man's confusion turns to anger, "What?"

"You could stay though! It would be interesting to see an outsider's thoughts on all of this mess! So what do you say Marco? Want to join the Riot revolution?" Alexis reaches out her hand, but the plumber slaps it away!

"Fuck you." (HEEL TURN)

The plumber then walks away, much to the dismay of Alexis,

"Come on Marco! Don't leave! You and me could be a great-" A slam of a door shuts Alexis up. Disappointed, Alexis slumps down in her chair, muttering to herself,

"You introduce a guy and then he just leaves! Who does he think is? I would have paid him just to stay and chat with-"

Alexis then remembers that the camera is still on and why she was even filming herself in the first place. Smiling once more, she turns her chair around to face the camera,

"So anyway, today I'll be talking about the Meme Queen her... I mean himself! LUCA ARZ..., ARZI..., ARZEN?, Arzegetti? Arzaygottee? Arzey? Um.... you know fuck it! I'm talking about Luca... yeah let's just call him Luca! Now Luca has not just made one, but TWO little promos about me, so this might take awhile. Hope you all brought snacks! Let's get started!"

"I need to stop sounding so excited to talk about these shitheads."

[color=#FF69B4]"Let's start with Luca's first video, "Commander Cocaine". Good title, because the only way any of you listeners can be as brain dead as The Meme Queen here is under the influence of drugs. He starts out acting like a prick, what a shocker, complaining about being in the Co-Main event and acting like being in only four matches in all of 2015 is an accomplishment. Spoiler alert, it's not and you're just a lazy douche. He then bad mouths the fans and blah-blah-blah nothing special, although I do want to answer the questions he asked about the fans wanting to see "his clock get cleaned".

"Do they care who does it?"

"Not really, you're correct there."

"Do they remember when someone does it?"

"Well, when you only wrestle FOUR MATCHES IN A SINGLE YEAR, it's easy for fans to forget your past mistakes. In fact, they pretty much have forgotten about you entirely until recently. I wish it stayed that way."

"Does it even happen?"

"It will happen on Warfare, trust me pal."

"Also, I find it funny that you say the XWF is not on your level! If it's so below you Luca, why don't you go to a different fed? Oh, that's right,"

"Because no other fed would even let your bitch ass enter through its doors!"

"Now let's get to the juicy bits. Drake already covered the parts about himself and about me and Drake, so I'm just going to focus on the parts that talk about me in particular."

"One, fuck your lunch! Even if I accepted your offer, I'm not sure how you would be able to eat with a broken jaw from yours truly! Two, nice accomplishments you have there! Shame they don't mean shit now! What matters now is this belt I hold right here! Now you once held this belt as well, for two months in fact, but that was all the way back in 2012! We thought the world would end that year! What have you done since that year, at least when it comes to titles that are still relevant?"

"Fuck and all,"

"You did face John Madison for the title of King of the XWF, and while that was an historic event, in the end you didn't win. The history books will go down saying that "John Madison beat Luca Fuck-His-Last-Name to become the first ever King of the XWF winner!", and that's all that matters! Coming in second doesn't mean shit in the world of wrestling! You say you haven't peaked yet? I say you haven't fallen yet, and the 6th will go down in your mind as the day you began to fall down into obscurity for good! The defining moment of my career will be me standing over you, Austin, and 's broken bodies! You say I've been playing chess while you guys have been playing checkers?"

Alexis then gets a serious look on her face, sending a chilly stare into the camera,

"Well I'm not here to play, so I suggest you start putting your toys away."

"And to your credit, you did do just that in your second promo, 'Generalissimo Arzegotti'. Not sure what that means but hey, it's a better name then 'Commander Cocaine'!"

"Baby steps, guys,"

"Now while in your last promo the main focus was on Drake, this one is all about little ole me,"

A wry smile appears on Alexis's face and she cracks her knuckles, "This should be fun,"

"You accuse me of inflating my record by counting kicking out of pins in unsanctioned matches as victories? You know what? You're partially right about that,"

"Partially"

"You see, the reason I count my kick outs as victories is because I don't just "kick out", I leave my opponents in states where I could pin them for the three count if it was a sanctioned match! In fact, if I was a total assclown, I probably would pin them! The reason I don't though is one, I don't like to waste my time, and two, there could be anyone lurking anywhere gunning for my belt, so I should try to get some distance between them and me before they try a sneak attack!"

"I'm smarter than I look,"

"You also call me a fake, like you're any better! You see, you rely on cheap memes and tough talk to appeal to others, while I don't care what others think period! If you like me, great, if you hate me, better. Now I am a loner, but I'm not exactly antisocial. I can still make friends like any other mentally stable person, it's just that due to my life experiences I don't easily trust people. Even the kindest of people on the outside can be like you on the inside, so it takes a lot to earn my trust."

"And Drake has earned my trust,"

"You see Drake and I are not so different. Both of us have come from rough backgrounds, but have risen above them to achieve success and do what we think is right, which in this case is kick your lily ass! We both are looked down upon as "complete jokes" and "losers", and are chomping at the bit to prove all you assholes wrong! Having a tag team partner does not make me a fake, it just means I know someone who is as crazy and near suicidal as I am and just as willing to take the CCWF down!"

"I don't need a therapist, I need an exorcist,"

"I'm not the one fronting here, the only fakes I see are the two cunts I'll be dominating at Warfare! You're telling me to "#getgud"? I'm already "gud", thank you very much, I'm just trying to #getbetter. If you guys are the "executioners" cutting off the heads of us XWF "chickens", you're about to find out that we're not any ordinary group of cocks. We are like the chickens from Legend Of Zelda, we are indestructible, annoying as fuck, and won't stop attacking until you are dead!"

"Also, what's this I'm hearing about you comparing the Riot revolution to the Occupy movement?"

"First of all, this revolution isn't just me and Drake, in fact, it started before me and Drake even got here! When you guys first fucked shit up, the movement began to grow, all me and Drake did is give it a name and two faces! There are more of us out there, and soon we will come at you like a flood. Second of all, I'm not here to "Occupy" the XWF,"

"I'm here to free it,"

"There's no need to tell me what I already know. Shane IS the one who writes our paychecks, although I have a feeling he'll start "forgetting" to pay me really soon, but I'm not here for money. I'm here to do two things, kick ass and destroy the CCWF. Money is a non factor, a side project, be it for better or worse."

"Finally, I'm no "slacktivist". If I was a "slacktivist" I wouldn't even be wasting my time proving you guys wrong at every corner, hell, I wouldn't even have signed up for this match! I am active in my attempts to take down the CCWF, and you will find that out first hand when I get my hands on you in that ring."

"Also, I find it ironic Mr. "I Only Wrestle Four Matches A Year" is talking to me about slacking off!"

"You're also saying that because I am the currant X-Treme Champion and RIGHTFULLY bragging about holding the company's second most prestigious prize that I'm a sellout?"

"I thought a multiple title holder would understand this, but apparently not. You see, simply winning and bragging about winning a title doesn't make you a sellout, how and why you win it does. You see, this belt wasn't handed to me, nor did I rely on outside interference to win it, I simply saw an opportunity and took it. I know what you're going to say "You hit a man with a baseball bat to win that belt! That's a dick move!" Yes it is, but it's the X-TREME CHAMPIONSHIP. Need I say more? Also, I didn't win this belt for anybody! I won this belt by myself and for myself, and you'll see I'm no paper champion when I beat the shit out of you on the 6th!"

"In fact Luca, the only sell-out I see here is you. Look at yourself, trying out all the latest trends and memes to try to seem "hip" and "cool", reflecting on past accomplishments because you've done jack shit in the present, and having to kiss the bosses ass and join his little power posse to stay relevant."

"You,"



"Sold,"




"Out,"


"You also mentioned how that by my logic compared to me and Drake you are "Omni-fucking-potent". I think something got lost in translation. You see, that's not my logic, that's Austin Fernando's logic, and I was using his own logic against him. Luca, no matter how many titles you win, no matter how much trash talk you can sling my way, no matter how much "brown pride" you have, you are still a mortal. You can grow tired, you can grow weak, you can bleed, and in the words of our special guest enforcer,"

"If it bleeds, I can kill it."



"Until the next time Fernando and Luca say something stupid, Riot out!"

Once again the screen fades to static, but this time instead of cutting to a black screen, it cuts to a tombstone. On the tombstone are the words,

"R.I.P Shane "

"???-1/6/16"

"He will not be missed,"

The camera stays on the tombstone as we fade to black.

Love me? Good. Hate me? Better

Accomplishments:
1 Time X-Treme Champion
Snow Job Gauntlet Winner