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X-treme Wrestling Federation »   » Archives » Relentless Day 3
Because You're My Friend And That's The Nicest Thing I've Said
Author Message
Gator Offline
The Walking Disaster



XWF FanBase:
Mixed

(loved by some; hated by some; dips between clean/dirty)


#1
07-29-2015, 01:53 PM




Sooooo it's been a weird couple of days. I've not only watched Doc's and Lane's promos but I've watched every bodies stuff, you know, try and fan the flames so to speak. And I have dick all. It's sad to be honest, when I met D'Ville in the ring, looked that fucker in the eye and I was fired up, ready to punch the son of a bitch in his cunt face, but just seeing him on TV makes me feel nothing. And it's not just because the dude is basically going through the generic trash talk handbook, it's more because I'm not angry, like at all. I don't know what's up with me, I stopped doing yoga a week ago ever since Alison gave me the good to go. Well, kinda, I may be a tad crazy but honestly who isn't?

I'm driving down the road on this lovely afternoon here in Boston, Todd is in the passenger's seat beside me on his phone. I'm smoking an ecigarette, yeah I smoke an ecig now, and thinking way too hard about all this shit as Todd's iPod plays his terrible, terrible music at full blast. He said it'll get me worked up, but it's just annoying me. I start to bop my head for some reason.. Oh god. Gator no!

"♪ California here we come, right back where we started from. ♪"

No dude, seriously? We're not even in California! Todd looks up from his phone, I look back. And the worst moment of my life happens.

♪ Hustlers grab your guns, your shadow weighs a ton, driving down the 101. California here we come, right back where we started from. Californiaaaaaaaa! Here we come!!!! ♪
T: ♪ Hustlers grab your guns, your shadow weighs a ton, driving down the 101. California here we come, right back where we started from. Californiaaaaaaaa! Here we come!!!! ♪

... Ugh...

One awful fucking song later, we arrive at a Starbucks. I hate this place, filled with so many douchebags. People like Vinnie Lane, and Todd. But goddamn I am a sucker for their lattes. We enter the fairly empty Starbucks, greeted by that god awful soft indie music that this place churns out, the tapping of hipster's fingers hitting keyboards coming up with their big new screenplay that will finally get them out of Boston, and that fucking coffee machine that sounds like it runs on a damn coal engine. Me and Todd walk in and look around, where I see a familiar face. Luke Gunnar is sitting at a table drinking a coffee. Wait, that's not Gunnar. Oh it's that Grime asshole, didn't think he was still alive. After a few steps closer to the counter the gears turn and I finally realise it's Drew Archyle, all these undercards look the same to me. I, for some reason, give the guy a smile and a wave despite never actually encountering him ever. He looks up with a raised eyebrow and nods his head greeting me, and going back to his drink as I get to the counter.

Todd starts to pat his pockets and me, being a fucking fruit now, politely put my hand out, motioning him to stop.

"I got this man, go get us a table."

I take my wallet out of from my jeans and open it up, and a moth flies out as a 'wah wah waaaaaaaaaah' sound plays. Or it might as well have, seriously, I'm fucking broke right now. Can't live of merch sales alone. I place my order and hand the barista a twenty, and get two dollars back in change. Yay! Fucking rip off. As I go to the end of the counter, resting my head on my arms it hits me that I'm wearing my mask and not one single person has gave me a second look. Sure, some people know who I am, I've been here a few times before but not one person cares. I could rob this place blind and nobody would know who I am, except some wrestler in the XWF.

The lovely young woman hands me our lattes and I go back to the table that Todd picked out. I can tell Ashe Dawson is burning a hole in the back of my head for some reason as I walk by, but I ignore him. I take my seat opposite Todd who sits there with a smile as I hand him his latte and he knocks quickly and very purposefully knocks the cup to the floor. How very fucking delightful!

"What the hell man?"

T: "I decided I didn't want it."

"That was like nine dollars. I got extra cream for you."

T: "Yeah but I'm not thirsty."

"Oh.. Alright then buddy."

I hate myself and I want to die. I go to take a sip of my overpriced latte and Todd reaches out a hand and slaps the cup out of my hand. I freeze for a moment, staring at Todd who sits there smug. I let my hands fall back down to the table and try to calm myself, I shouldn't, I should flip this table and strangle this cunt to death.

"Come on man now you're just taking the piss. They're going to throw us out if you make a mess."

T: "No, I've been taking the piss for a few days. Now I'm trying to make you mad."

"Well it's working."

I reach into my pocket and dig around, taking out my ecig and taking a drag. Mmm, tutti-fruity. I blow the, smoke? Steam? Magic dust? Whatever, out into the air and see Todd looking at me quizzically behind the puff of smoke.

T: "Can I try that?"

I hesitate but hand it over anyway. Todd takes the ecig and examines it for a moment, I relax in my chair staring straight ahead. Todd puts the ecig in his mouth, getting it really in there and wetting the end way too much. Gross. He takes a drag and immediately starts to cough.

T:*Cough* *Cough* "Fuck, how do you smoke this?"

"Usually by inhaling the smoke then exhaling the smoke, like breathing but better."

Todd makes a sarcastic laugh... Oh shit! I was sarcastic! Gator! You're learning! Todd takes the ecig and twirls it in his fingers, I hold out my open palm but Todd takes the ecig and begins to clean his ear with it... You know when a moment happens in your life, you see something so horrific you just freeze, everything goes in slow motion and no matter what you do your limbs won't respond. You just are there, in that moment with your eyes wide and your body in total shock. This is my 9/11. Todd finishes cleaning his ear and tries to hand the ecig back to me.

"Nah man, you keep it."

T: "Nah, I don't smoke. Take it back man, it'll be rude if you don't."

... Mother fucker.

T: "You don't want to be a rude asshole now do you?"

I want to explode, but I don't. I can't. Uuuuuuuuuuuugh. I rub my brow as my headache intensifies and hold my hand back out, Todd shakes his head putting the ecig back in my hand and I begin to clean it thoroughly with my t-shirt. One of the staff walks over to the table with a smile and looks at me.

"Hey! I'm sorry sir but there's no smoking here. I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

I respond continuing to clean the ecig.

"It's cool, it's electronic."

"They're not allowed either sir."

I stop cleaning the ecig and place it on the table, looking at the girl.

"Are you joking?"

She seems a bit taken back. Todd looks on leaning forward a little.

"I walk in here wearing a mask, not one single person bats an eyelid. This cunt opposite me throws two lattes onto the floor, causing a public disturbance and making a huge fucking mess for you to clean up for minimum wage. But I take one, ONE, drag of this stupid fucking device that doesn't even help me stop smoking tobacco and you come over here telling me to leave!? Hahahahahaha!!! Fuck you!"

I get to my feet, knocking the chair to the floor. Fuck this feels good. Todd gets up to, a smile plastered on his face.

T: "Gator! You're back man!"

I turn to Todd who is happy to see me back to normal and bitch slap the smile off his face. The girl gasps and takes a step back.

"I aplogise for ruining your shitty little Starbucks, have a brilliant day ma'am. Here's your tip."

I take the ecig and stick it in the girl's mouth, giving her a playful tap on the cheek and walking away. Todd holding his face in pain, almost slips in the spilled liquid as he follows. I chuckle like any normal human being would do and open the door, Todd exits first as I turn to Drew looking at me.

"Drew, instead of hiring the human form of a penguin to think for you, do your own fucking work for once and actually try to form a clever sentence on your own. While you're at it, stop being Frodo 2.0 and go after actual wrestlers instead of trying to pick fights with management you dense twat. Peace! I'm out!"

I walk backwards through the door throwing up double peace signs. I turn laughing to myself exiting the building and walking down the path, nicking a lit cigarette from the mouth of some business man. He shouts something but doesn't try and stop me, because he's not an idiot most likely. Speaking of idiots, I have a few new thoughts on my opponents. I smile to myself as I meet Todd at the DeLorean and we enter, I start up the car and pull away quickly down the road Todd's music starts to play again, Bullet for my Valentne. Ugh. I rip the iPod away and throw the damn thing onto the tarmac.

Ah, it's good to be back.



I sit down, camera in front, Todd's a bitch, go go go!

"No time for pleasantries, fuck you all! Let's get shit on the road!"

"So we get a great look at Lane's inner workings here, dude's in a coma, he's lost, confused, trapped in his own mind and he's going through a whole bunch of crazy shit. And the thing he thinks about more than most is little old me. How fucking adorable. Snot nosed punk in J-Pro was I Vinnie? Yeah maybe, I was not the same guy I am now. But honestly I feel better being that shitty little brat compared to that shitty little nobody who couldn't get anything done, you're doing great now man but back then, woo, I didn't think you could make it at all. But here you are, good for you."

"Fucking awesome right? Me and you, dueling it out for something we both want. Good times. Two younger guys in J-Pro, still working our way up, still fighting with limp wrists in the ring and going out back and having a beer to being the best here, fighting each other tooth and nail and going out back and having a beer. I saw you come in after me and I was like, this is cute. Dude just can't survive by himself without having his role model Gator paving the way for him. Because let's face it man, everything you've done, everything you've achieved, I did it first and I did it better. I won the TV, you won the Trios. You won the Hart, I won the Uni albeit for a brief moment."

"We could have ruled the world! We could have been the best team this place has ever seen. But it never happened, it could never happen, because let's face it dude. We both have or egos, we both have our goals and I'd get sick of you riding my coattails for however long our super team lasted."


Loverboy Vinnie Lane Said:You slapped me in the face when you formed Defiance

"And you punched me in the dick when you decided Peter Gilmour and Morbid Angel would make better Trio partners than me. You spat in my face when you decided working for MacClay was a better option than working with me. Don't play the victim when you're just as guilty yourself. But that's just what you do best right? And it's the reason why we could never be the team you apparently dreamed of us being, because you whine, you complain and you push the blame. Imagine if we lost a match, I would have to endure listening to you tell me how it was somehow my fault for the rest of my life. Because that is the type of person you are."

"A basic bitch."

"Also, one more thing, Defiance weren't after you. Sane, Fern and CorVus weren't after you. We were after Asylum. Remember Lethal Lottery? You teamed up with CorVus, who was the guy who made sure he didn't break your legs and leave you hanging? Yeah, you're fucking welcome you ungrateful shit."


Bitchboy Vinnie Lane Said:See man, when you went after the Uni against the Doc the first time, I was right there cheering you on.
...
But where were you, dude? Where were you when I was locked in that cage with D’Ville?

"Excuse me? ... Ex-fucking-cuse me? Hahaha, wow! How exactly where you rooting me on? Mentioning me briefly in a promo and watching backstage as you were masturbating over your belt? I'm so very sorry I was dealing with my own stuff, but I was cheering you on. Why the fuck wouldn't I? You know I did. Fuck D'Ville, dude's a cunt. I for some reason like you, I cheered for you. If you're seriously asking me where was I when you were in that cage, where the fuck where you when I was in that chamber? Duke hid in a box for D'Ville, why didn't you do the same? You let me down Vinnie. Sadface. I was cheering you on in the back. Don't believe me? Oh well. I was at Bad Medecine if you remember, gave Duke a bit of payback which was fun. Sorry I didn't see you, sorry I didn't give you that loving embrace you wanted so so bad, sorry you were crying after you got your ass kicked and just wanted to go home for a hot bath and had no fucking time for anyone. Grow up Lane, you're embarrassing me."

Fuckboy Vinnie Lane Said:No. You took your ball and you went home, didn’t you? You came up short one time and you just went ahead and asked for the check. You lay down for fucking MAVERICK, dude.

"I broke my fucking neck dude. Fuck, were where you? Why didn't you cheer me on in the crowd and ride out on a white horse and save me like the brave knight you truly are? ... If that's laying down then what the fuck is this coma you're in? If leaving on management's orders to heal up is taking my ball and going home, then I guess you're just as bad as me. You lost to fucking Ginger Snaps. You lost to a chick who thinks a lariat and a clothesline are totally different things, a girl who can't read and confuses goats for llamas and you lost to her on her fucking debut. Then you looked on as she defended her belt against TBX and you ended up in a coma. Awesome."

Ladyboy Vinnie Lane Said: something that belongs to those of us who stuck around and kept fighting while you were licking your little wounds and trying to feel better about not winning every single time.

"You're in a fucking coma! And have been for a while now. What makes you different? I still have title shots under my belt, I am one of a very select few who deserve to be the Universal Champion and while Doc has been hanging out with the nobodies I have been healing up, and yeah, you're right this is the second coming of the messiah. Fucking believe it you piece of shit, I'm back and better than ever while you're going through the same fucking motions over and over and fucking over but this time in comaland. Oh no! How will Vinnie Lane go to some shitty mall and call kids names for being fans of different wrestlers!? Oh me oh my! How will we manage if we don't see Roxy and Vinnie talk about sex for the millionth time!? Maybe this coma is a blessing, maybe this time you can actually grow as a human being."

"Maybe, but it's not looking good when you basically go for the same shit as you did last time we faced. Gator's my bro, but man, he's not my bro dude. Fuck Lane, show some goddamn teeth for the first time in your miserable life. Don't pussyfoot around, call me a cunt. Call me a piece of shit. Try doing anything that isn't you saying I'm this and that when you're in the same fucking boat I am. Then you talk about the first time you got the win over me, in this environment. You did, and I'm not going to try and deny that, because I'm not a pussy, but when it's about our one on one. "


You're out of your league boy Vinnie Lane Said:Well, you had to have the rules changed to beat me, didn’t you?

"You mean when Kirk, your leader at the time, came out and said we're going into extra time because Vinnie needs another chance? Because our match technically ended in a draw but Kirk believed you could somehow beat me? And I stood up and I kicked your ass. Again, grow the fuck up and admit when you lost you fucking child. This whole thing you're doing now, it's simple whiney bullshit. It means nothing and it can be brushed aside with ease, you're fucking pathetic dude. Oh but just because a long, long time ago you won a four way, this time will be the same. Hahaha, I've pinned you, I've pinned Doc. Something you can and will never be able to say, I know I can beat you. You know you can avoid me and get an easy pin. I'm happy with what I have."

I take a cigarette out from the packet in front of me and light it up, taking a good long drag and blowing smoke into the air.

"I'm rusty too, need to step my game up soon. Then again if this is what's going to happen all week then I guess me being rusty will do just fine."

I rub my mask and get to my feet, starting to pace back and forth as I continue to smoke.

"Hahaha. Then we have Doc, back with his shield up after I knocked it down last time we faced off. Back to being all polite and friendly after he was being such a devilish little prick with me, hello my friend. How have you been? Let's face it here guys, the three of us, we aren't the most active guys in the fed are we? Lane's in a coma, my neck is fucked up and Doc only come back for his monthly check up. Like what I did there D'Ville? You can use that one if you'd like. But we don't need to be around a lot do we? We've all made such a hug fucking impact in this hell hole people will be talking about us for years to come."

"The three musketeers. That all fight one another and never seem to work together for once to change the world. Oh well, it's a hell of a lot more fun this way. So Doc, I have to ask. What the fuck is up? Why are you doing this polite bullshit now when you showed such fire before? Must I piss you off again? Get the fire roaring so I can finally have some fucking fun with you? Come on Doc, let the devil loose and let's have some fun. I'm tired of this whole facade you put on, the helping hand, the light in the darkness. I want the man who wanted my blood, I wanted the Doc angry and ready to tear me up."

"Not this pussy with a fake smile still rehashing the same points he rehashes in every promo he's ever done. Vague bullshit and facts we all know about, trying to say he's the top dog but not making me believe he's the top dog. I don't want to talk about Defiance or Asylum because who gives a fuck about teams we used to be in? Or are you still in Asylum? I don't know, seems like everyone left you on the mountain. Anyway I don't want to talk about them, but I will do if I can see that fire again. Just one last time."

"But, you haven't said much about me really. More stating the obvious and talking about how great I was. Was. I need to prove myself all over again here. And I'm going to. Doc, Lane.. Harrison? Maybe. I'm here, and I want some fun back and forth before I go into that ring and use Lane's comatose body to beat D'Ville's smug face into the fucking mat. You two, listen the fuck up and pay attention. I'm back. And right now I'm not at one hundred percent, I need you two to show me you're actually as good as you say so then I can get that passion back and crush you both under my foot."

"Because your egos, your talent and our history doesn't mean shit to me. You're both worthless in my eyes, and I will stand here in front of this camera and convince the world to think the same way as me. I will walk into Madison Square Garden and I will show the world just how much you both truly mean to me. And I will walk out the champ with blood on my hands and a big shit eating grin on my face."

"That's it for today, step your game up guys. Let's have some fun!"

"Also Luca, make sure you don't overdoes in the ring before raising my arm in victory. Later."



F A D E 2 B L A C K

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Because You're My Friend And That's The Nicest Thing I've Said - by Gator - 07-29-2015, 01:53 PM



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