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X-treme Wrestling Federation »  RP Archive » Archives » 24/7 Federweight Championship
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You reek of fish, my dear.
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John Samuels Offline
Whatever you are, be a good one.



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#1
07-14-2015, 05:28 AM

Samuels inhales deeply, gags and vomits as he approaches Roxy Cotton from behind (like so many have done before.)

"Holy shit. With every step you take it smells like half rotted anchovies are having an orgy in a kiddy pool full of Middle Eastern diahrrea. You should definitely get that shit checked out.

How in our sweet lord's name did a shard-born syphilis haven like you win the Federweight title? A belt held by such prestigious names as... Ah fuck, this belt is more worthless than a male nipple now that I think about it. Who are you exactly? The name sounds a bit familiar... Say! Aren't you the mentally stunted cherry hole that Vinnie Lane pretends to not be a inside of? Such a pleasure to meet you, I've always wondered what would happen if Toxic Avenger and Pretty Woman did a crossover, and it smells like I have my answer.

Enough with the pleasantries, I'm afraid. See, everyone's been kind of waiting for this moment. The Federweight championship was crafted specifically for me, the man who beat Feder more times than you've beaten strange men in an alley for three crack rocks and a lukewarm Diet Coke. It was always a given that I'd win this piece of shit belt if and when I ever felt a level of self loathing that would plummet me down to the depths of despair that sewer-pussed cumtraps like you dwell in. Well honey, I'm home. The great and mighty John Samuels has hit rock bottom and for some reason feels the need to fraternize with the XWF's bottom dwellers. This is probably great for you though right? I'm sure your pus-encrusted vulva swelled up just hearing my voice, you disgusting whore. You're literally making me sick just standing there. I'd slap you for masquerading as a champion, but I don't think Valtrex makes hand creams just yet. So I'll make you a deal, sweet cheeks: You hand me that belt that I've been letting you children play with while daddy had bigger fish to fry, and I won't report that toxic cesspool you call a babymaker to the CDC. I always thought Vinnie was a pussy but if he dives into that thing wearing anything less than a hazmat suit and a Teflon condom, then he's got some fucking guts. Or he's just -that- hard up for action, which is just as plausible.

Not gonna take the easy road, are you? My stomach just turned at the thought of physically removing the belt from you, you decaying whore. How am I going to get the stench out of it? I don't know which is worse, the smell of your rotten cunt or the tear stains from Vinnie's shortcomings. My first order of business will be to soak this fucking thing in Clorox and holy water, and then I'll be praying that Jesus himself has the power to cleanse the belt of the putrid diseases that your festering fuckhole have undoubtedly passed on."


Samuels sticks his whole arm in a Magnum condom and choke slams the bitch with it. He puts another condom on over his tennis shoe and steps on her face for the pin.


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[Image: WWF-JBL_1506347856131-768x431.jpg]

1X - GOAT.
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Messages In This Thread
You reek of fish, my dear. - by John Samuels - 07-14-2015, 05:28 AM
re:You reek of fish, my dear. - by Roxy Cotton - 07-14-2015, 03:02 PM
You reek of fish, my dear. - by Matthew Oaktree - 07-14-2015, 05:25 PM



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