"Loverboy" Vinnie Lane stands in front of a chain link fence backdrop with an XWF logo placard across the top.

As he grins into the camera with the HART Championship and Federweight Championship belts over his shoulders, he lifts a fingerless-gloved hand and pulls his aviator shades down his nose, peering over them as his sky blue eyes, along with his platinum blond hair and bright pink bandanna, pierce the dark ambiance of the backdrop and his black leather apparel.

With a stilted laugh, he regards the camera.

"As if there was ever any doubt that your girlfriend's favorite wrestler, the rock n' roll megastar, the guy the girls come to see and the men want to be, was the epitome of greatness in the XWF... look at this.

Six weeks. I've been the Federweight Champion, a belt that is supposed to be jumping around like a cat in a rocking chair factory, for a month and a half. Shane and John Madison might as well put my name on the belt permanently, dudes, because I'm not going anywhere or letting go of this thing anytime soon - not unless the talent around here drastically improves, anyway.

I've sent All of you packing. Mini Morbid. Calypso. Scully. TJ Wallace. Tommy Wish. Even the guy I'm going to shut down tomorrow night on Madness, Muddy Waters, got sent running with his tail between his legs when he tried to step up.

I mean... my god... even the undefeatable Doctor Louis D'Ville couldn't get this title off of my waist, dude.

So who's going to bother trying?

Yeah... that's what I thought.

Pussies."

Loverboy then slowly gets down onto the bare concrete floor, his vinyl pants squeaking as he bends his legs. He then fully lies down on the ground and looks back into the camera.

"See, apparently, I was right about the wannabes in the XWF all along... no one here can hang with the megastar. So if I want a challenge, I have to just be like Peter Gilmour and spend my time just beating myself. So here goes."

Loverboy reaches across to his legs and grabs the back of his own thigh, pulling his legs over himself and 'pinning' his shoulders to the ground.

An extremely confused referee shrugs, but drops to the floor when Loverboy shoots him an angry look.


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