I'm the "number one contender" for your title now, since John Samuels is a pussy.
So... gimme.
Oh, by the way, I totally got you a Christmas tree(pine tree), since I'm cool like that. Hopefully this will keep that Tappinbaum fucker from showing up.
Scorpio kicks out and pushes Satoko's off him....Then suddenly realizes that it's Lane who pinned him and he feels totally embarrassed, Lane is much more girly looking. Scorpio then plants Lane with a Scorpio Death Drop, walks over to the Christmas Tree and unzips his pants. It looks as though he's about to piss on the tree but he suddenly breaks into a musical number.