You can change what made me this? You can go back and stop this from becoming of me?

Nova nodded but had a look of displeasure on his face as if to say, "but I don't want to or don't feel right to do so." I could have Sage back, everything would go back to normal and I would be allowed to go on with out regrets of losing Sage, without....Damien. I only came here with Jason because I had no other choices and not one thing to stay behind for. If things had changed, if my path was different, would I really be here now?

Going back anyway could change everything of today. It doesn't matter if you stopped this from happening to me or not, you just going back could change everything, and not just with me. Am I right?

Once again the spaceman gave a nod and looked to the ground. A war was raging on in my body, not just with my Human and Siren DNA, but the thought of change. I looked away from Nova allowing my eyes to look at the ground. I could chose to have Sage and not become a monster, but that also ran the risk of losing everything I had here. Over looking all the small things, I had the choice of my old life, or my possible new life here with Damien. Would Damien even want to stay around after I become whatever it is I am to be?

Don't do it.....

Nova looked up as I turned my attention to him. My eyes flashed of Golden and my body ran with heat.

Don't go back at all. What happened, happened and you shouldn't go back and change anything about it. I made a bed and I will lay in it, no mater how many needles lay in that bed. I have a last resort that I never want to use, but now I will. I won't risk changing everything for not only myself, but everyone around me just so I can lay at night and not look at myself as a monster.

I gripped my jacket, trying to hold on to the pain until I was out of sight. I began to walk away from Nova before turning back to him.

You see the full picture Nova, you told me that yourself, you don't care very much of the detail put into it. My picture is I'm changing into something I cant control, the small detail to that is I lost something dear to me, something I will die for in order to keep safe. The detail to my picture is the loss of something I care for brought something else I care for into my life. While I would walk into a body of fire and die to go back to how things were, I will not do that at the risk of changing lives of others and lose what I worked hard for now.

I could barley read Nova's face. He seemed to be relived in me telling him not to change anything, but, at the same time he had a look of perhaps worry or an uneasy feeling. I came for answers and I got them, were they the answers I wanted, no. I was also given ways to fix everything, but no matter how inconsolable I felt knowing everything I lost by saying no, I would not bring myself to say yes.

You can change what you are turning into, Nova, you can change it with out reverting the past and changing everything. I can't. I have nothing to do but wait to find out what monster I will become.

A smiled inched across my face. It was a smile of memories of my little girl and what I used to be and watching it vanish. I turned from Nova, still smiling to myself, and began to make my depart with the information given to me.