05-13-2019, 09:54 PM
SNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNK
...how about the marshmallow perfume…
SNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNK
...its never too early for buttstuff, babe…
SNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNK
...please stop doing this whole “I want you to come back to UGWC but I also want you to do what’s best for you even though its, like, in complete opposition to one another” storyline that you are doing and I’ve hinted that I REALLY don’t like or appreciate, circumstances considering...
SNKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK KKK KKK SNK!
Hmmm? Wha?
Oh shit!
I fell asleep!
Dude, I am SO sorry!
Like...shit! My bad!
But, hey, its not MY fault that it turns out that you voiced the onscreen cameo by Jigglypuff in the new Detective Pikachu movie! It’s not MY fault that your greatest talent and special moves are sleep-based! It’s not MY fault that everyone got so bored of your dumbshit takes on what counts as riveting promotional work that they went to bed! And! AND! It’s also not MY fault that this match was axly awarded to me, like, seven responses ago because holy FUCK you are SO bad at this! Hell, you’re worse than TinyD! And HE cried about a fast count!
And! It’s not MY fault you suck so much that you’ve fallen into spending all of your time telling stories that don’t axly get around to being about me or this verbal contest, because you Pulled a Lux and blew all of your lukewarm juice in the first salvo! Its not MY fault that you are so desperate to throw up words on a screen that you have lost all sense of punctuation, pacing, and line breaks! Its not MY fault that, in the course of the evening, you have shown yourself to be a boring, feckless, uninspired child stalker looking for his next score by buying all the kids those gross ice cream bars with the shitty gumball that look NOTHING like the Ninja Turtle or Slimer or whatever they are meant to represent!
Its not MY fault that you, your promo capabilities, and your wrestling career ARE that gross ice cream bar with the shitty gumball!
Now, I WILL award and acknowledge you for that aforementioned cameo as everyone’s favorite puffy (read: fat) singing pokemon with verbal skills so shitty that they induce comas. However, I will NOT award you for saying, with a straight face and in the same sentence, that I showed how unoriginal I am when I busted out a PLETHORA of different and original ways to call you fat. So, I will spend the rest of my time, before they FINALLY call this lame-ass attempt at relevancy on your part, by mentioning OTHER names you would totes respond to:
Chunkers McTubba
Fattimus Maximus
Boston “Haven’t seen my toes in YEARS” Bomber
The Never Met a Donut He Didn’t Like Kid
John Pinette Look-a-Like Contest Winner Three Years Running
The editor of Huffing-and-Puffington Post
Patient Zero for the Dickie-Do disease.
The what, you say? The disease where your belly sticks out further than your dickie do!
|
![[-]](https://xwf99.com/images/portal2/collapse.gif)
The following 1 user Likes Lacklan's post:
