WE ARE NOW READY TO START OFF THIS WEEKS MADNESS!!!
A CHANCE MEETING
Cameras come upon the very familiar office of Madness General Manager – RANDALL CROSS! Cross is hard at work filling out the normal paperwork that accompanies so many of the GM’s responsibilities, and it’s commendable that he is able to concentrate despite the loud whir of a saw blade eating away at the walls. Dust and wood shavings float through the air where they land at Cross’s desk. He decides to save it for another time and checks his gold Rolex – Ah, it’s about that time anyway.
Cross rises from his seat and walks to the front of his desk, perfectly timing it with the door opening slowly. Griffin MacAlister and Michael James are cautious as they take a look at the carpentry crew cut along their hand-drawn lines across the cut-in entertainment center. Griffin’s eyes furrow with confusion as he looks back at Randall, while MJ simply folds his arms and takes a seat on the arm of the leather sofa straight across from Randall’s desk.
MacAlister: What’s going on?
Randall: New TV playa.
MacAlister: Didn’t you just get a new TV?
Randall: This one’s bigger.
MacAlister: The other one was an 82-inch! How much bigger can you get?
Randall: 84-inches playa.
MacAlister: You’re doing all of this over 2 inches?
Randall: Two inches makes all the difference in the right places. You wouldn’t know that though now would you?
Michael: Why are we here?
MacAlister: Well we aren't here to marvel at the renovations this rich prick is making that's for sure. In fact I'm quite certain I know what's really going on so this guy better start talking cause I ain't got all day for this shit.
We go to commercial
Back from commercial
MacAlister: That’s all and then we're even....we're square? No more of that you sprung me out of jail bullshit.
Randall: That’s the plan. Now get out of here, playa. You know what to do.
MacAlister doesn’t seem to mind, as he is a man of his word and owes Randall a favor anyway. He’s got a little boost in his step as he swings open the door, glancing back towards Randall once more before taking off.
MacAlister: Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention...Sharp’s got a 90-inch out.
Randall’s nose flares for a moment as he looks at the carpentry crew, who stops what they’re doing to re-measure for a 90-inch TV, because everyone knows that Randall Cross is a playa, and this is what playas do.
Michael: Now why would I be interested in this?
Randall: Cause I will owe you.
Michael James rises to his feet and nods at Randall Cross who pulls his hands out of his pockets handing James a card. James looks down at the writing before a cautious grin finds its way onto his lips. James turns and leaves, leaving Cross to think about his goal being close to accomplished.
Randall: “Somebody get me that God-damn 90-inch!”
---
Match #1 Singles Match
Stoney
-vs-
AJ Powell
Steve: The match is underway with the opponents already in the ring. Tell me something Rick. Does Stoney stand a chance in this match.
Rick: Not at all!
The bell rings and Stoney jumps at the sound of it looking for the culprit before AJ catches him with a flying fist to the head. Stoney is rattled. AJ doesn't seem to care that Stoney is out matched by him and continues to landing vicious moves.
Steve: Rick...help your boy.
Rick: ZZZZzzzzzz
Steve: Are you asleep Rick...wake up!!! Stoney needs your help.
AJ is making quick work of Stoney and he sets him up.
Steve: Here it comes.....GOODNIGHT FROM LAS VEGAS!!!!!
AJ connects with his finisher and covers stoney up.
1
2
3
Steve: That was simple as they come. You can wake up now Rick.
WINNER: AJ POWELL
----
WHAT BRINGS YOU HERE
As AJ is celebrating his quick work of Stoney. The crowd gives a mix reaction as Neonero makes his way down the ramp. He slides in the ring and attacks AJ while he still in celebration.
Steve: What is up with the Cyaneyed Assassin!!!
Rick: I don't know but AJ is going to feel this.
Neonero grabs AJ and hits him with the TORCHING OF ROME laying him out flat in the middle of the ring. Neonero then wickedly smiles at the fallen AJ and rolls out the ring and makes his way up the ramp.
Steve: That was just vicious.
----
Match #2 First Blood Match
Ursula Areano
-Vs-
Sebastian Duke
Steve: Our next match up is a treat and a re-maych from the last Saturday Impact show.
Rick: Ursula is looking to even up the score on Duke.
Steve: Let us get with it then.
The arena falls dark, "God's Gonna Cut You Down" by Johnny Cash is heard on the sound system. Six of Duke's minions line the aisle, three on each side. They are carrying torches to light the path. Lights come on after Sebastian Duke reaches the ring.
“Weight of the World” is heard on the sound system. Ursula comes out from behind the curtain. When she gets to the ramp, shower fireworks reign down on her. She walks down the ramp with her hips moving back and forth and she is swinging her arms. She gets on the apron and enters the ring between the ropes. After that she walks over to the ropes on the right side and stands on the first rope. She then bends over and looks at the fans with a smile on her face. She then gets off the ropes and walks to one side of the ring and waits for the officials to start the match.
Ursula and Duke lock up. Ursula places him in a side headlock. A few seconds later Duke lifts Ursula up and slams her to the mat with a high angle back drop. They make it back to their feet and Ursula nails Duke with a kick to the face, dropping him where he stands. Ursula jumps into the air and slams her elbow into the chest of Duke. She makes it back to her feet and begins stomping on Duke while he gradually makes it back to his feet.
Steve: That Ursula is a little wild one.
Rick: I love her.
Steve: Hey, watch you there buddy.
Rick: Relax Steve, you still have your gay bar.
Ursula goes for a kick to the gut but Duke catches her foot and drops her with a charging clothesline. Duke walks around to the legs of Ursula and places her in a boston crab in the center of the ring. A few seconds later, Ursula gathers the strength to crawl along the canvas. She grabs the bottom rope forcing Duke to break the hold. Duke argues with the referee as Ursula uses the ropes to drag herself up. Ursula calls out to him and when Duke turns around he gets slammed in the face with a drop kick. She slides under the bottom rope. Now on the outside of the ring, Ursula approaches Duke and pulls him towards one of the ring posts. She places his legs on each side of the post. Ursula grabs a hold of his right ankle slams Duke’s knee cap into the steel post.
Steve: My goodness. I think I heard the knee crunch from here.
Rick: That has got to be an unbearable pain.
Duke screams in agony as he leans up and grips his right leg. Ursula reaches through the ropes and slams her fist into the side of his head causing Duke to drop to the canvas. Ursula grabs hold of his leg and repeats the assault on his knee cap by slamming it into the ring post. Ursula turns away and begins to mock Sebastian Duke.
Steve: Check out the crowd, they really behind Ursula as she continues to beat on that knee.
Rick: Never gonna give, never gonna give....
Steve: Rick are you singing. Get serious out here man, we got matches to call.
While Ursula works up the crowd Duke slides out of the ring under the bottom rope. He walks around the ring and grabs Ursula from behind. He sends her head first into the steel post. Ursula begins to stagger away from Duke in an effort to make her way back into the ring. Duke catches up with her and tosses Ursula into the ring under the bottom rope. Ursula is the first to make it back to her feet. When Duke rolls back into the ring Ursula begins to stomp on him before he can stand up. She grabs a hold of his scalp and slams her knee into the side of his face causing Duke to flip over onto his back. Ursula reaches down and grabs a hold of Duke by his hair and lifts him up so he is positioned on one knee.
Steve: I'm starting to feel bad for Duke, what is this lady going to do now.
Rick: She's going to marry me.
Ursula goes for kick but he counters her effort by catching her foot. He stands up and spins her around. When Ursula completes the 360 Duke drops her with a big boot to the face. He drags her back up and places Ursula in a half nelson submission hold. He locks the other arm and sends her crashing to the mat with a full nelson slam.
He drags Ursula back to her feet and clears her clock with a series of left and right hand punches to the gut. Duke irish whips Ursula into the corner and signals for a big clothesline. Duke charges towards Ursula and at the last second Ursula lifts up her legs and slams both of her feet into the jaw of Sebastian Duke. With Duke on the canvas she moves out of the corner and stomps down on Duke a few times before heading to the outside once again. She grabs a steel chair and folds in the seat so she can use it as a weapon on Duke. She holds up the chair to receive a pop from the audience at ringside. A few seconds later Duke approaches Ursula from behind and spins her around. Duke lunges at her and punches the chair into her face sending a loud “crack!” sound throughout the ringside area.
Steve: I felt that in my gut.
Rick: Yea but she felt that on her face. What a match!
The crowd gives Duke a huge pop while Ursula lies motionless on the floor. Duke drags her back up and tosses Ursula inside the ring. The referee takes notice of a thick welt in the side of her head from result of the assault with the steel chair. He turns his attention to Ursula while Duke wastes time on the outside working up the crowd. Suddenly, one particular member of the audience wearing a black ski mask lunges over the barricade and drops Duke with a diving clothesline. The fan makes it to his feet and picks up the fallen steel chair.
Steve: Is this a case of another crazed fan.
Rick: I hope not.
He holds it steady and slams it across the face of Sebastian Duke head causing another “crack!” sound to echo throughout the surrounding area. The masked man drops the dented chair on the floor and drags a bloodied Duke back to his feet. He places him in position for what appears to be a power bomb. He lifts Duke up and sends him crashing on top of the steel chair with a crucifix powerbomb. He stands back up to an ovation of insults and vulgarity from the ringside audience. He removes his ski mask and tosses it into the crowd as the cameras get a close up on the face of Black Circle member, N.A.Z.I.
Steve: It's N.A.Z.I.
Rick: What is he doing on Madness. Randall isn't going to like this one bit.
He lifts up Duke and rolls his motionless body back into the ring under the bottom rope. The referee turns his attention away from Ursula and takes instant notice of a bloody gash opened in the head of Duke. The referee calls for the bell and “Weight of the World” begins to play on the arena’s sound system.
Steve: No, not this way.
Rick: Either way ursula gets the ring.
WINNER: URSULA
---
HERE WE GO AGAIN
As Ursula is making her way up the ramp Neonero comes storming out and meets her half way with an assault. He kicks heron the leg dropping her down to one knee and connects with a SHINING WIZARD across the top of her head.
Steve: What the hell is his problem?
Rick: Don't know but he will have to answer to me for taking out my girl like that. He didn't even buy her dinner first.
Neonero just stares down at the fallen Ursula as we break for Commercial.
----
WHEN YOU GOTTA GO....WELL
The cameras cut to the backstage area near the arena’s dressing rooms. We move around a corner where we gain sight of Shane and Nathaniel Idenhaus making an exit from what appears to be Nathaniel’s dressing room. A few seconds after they move down the hallway Michael James walks into frame at the opposite end. He moves forward and enters the same room where the Black Circle members were seen making their exit. The cameras follow Michael James as he inspects the personal dressing room of Nathaniel Idenhaus with an expression of disgust on his face. His eyes light up upon sight of custom made klan cloak hood. James looks directly into the camera lens with a demented smile
Michael James: You thinking what I’m thinking?
James approaches the cloak and begins to unbuckle his pants and the cameras to back to the hallway. James is heard from inside the room, making a series of noises similar to someone with a mild case of diarrhea. After making a mess inside of Nathaniel’s custom made hood, he uses the matching cloak to wipe his ass. James places a cigar between his teeth and pulls a Zippo lighter from his pocket. He lights the tip of the cigar and exhales a cloud of smoke from his nostrils. He drops the lighter on top of Nathaniel’s outfit. Michael James casually makes his exit from the dressing room as the frame stays locked on the burning cloak.
Commercial
Back from commercial
When Madness returns from the commercial break we immediately cut to the backstage area. A crowd of firefighters and various XWF officials are seen inspecting the damage inside of Nathaniel’s dressing room caused from the unexplainable fire. Randall Cross walks into the room with an irritated look on his face. A few seconds after he begins his inspection, we hear Randall step forward and make a sudden “splat” sound. He looks down with a disgusted expression on his face. Randall leans down and inhales a rancid odor coming from the floor.
Randall Cross: You guys smell that, too?
A few of the fire fighters agree with Randall as he removes his shoe. He holds it up for a mid second to discover the bottom of his shoe covered in human waste.
Randall Cross: Aw, fuck to the no!
Randall drops the shoe and turns away from the mess on the floor. He storms out of the room while muttering to himself about “someone answering for this bullshit”.
----
Match #3 TLC Match
Cyren
-Vs-
Michael James
Steve: This is really a treat.
Rick: That's right...let's get this one rolling.
Steve: Hey, do you have any idea what that chance meeting at the beginning of the show was about.
Rick: Not at all.
The following is a TLC match! Introducing first, from Fujisawa Japan, he weighs in at 275lbs, The Personification of Perfection, Michael James!
The lights in the arena cut to black. A thick and steady drum beat echoes throughout the building as a mixture of red lights and smoke appear near the entrance. The house lights come on as the opening chords to “Dangan” blast throughout the arena. From behind the smoke we gain sight of Michael James as he takes a few steps forward. He takes a drag from the cigarette in his mouth and looks towards the audience with a sneer of disgust. James begins to make his way towards the ring as the fans toss garbage in his direction, cursing and jeering him as James just smiles and continues to walk towards the ringside area.
Aaand his opponent, from Dublin Ireland, he weighs in at 235lbs, ‘The Sickness, Cyren!
Old 'Black Order' logo flashes everywhere, Cyren floats down to the ring.
The bell rings, and Cyren immediately hops outside the ring. MJ looks on from his corner, and Cyren throws in 1...2...3...4 chairs! MJ immediately picks one up, and Cyren slides into the ring, moving for a chair himself, but MJ wastes no time with chivalry, and smacks the chair straight off Cyren’s back, sending a hellacious crack throughout the entire arena. At ringside a teenage fan has to leave because her eardrums have burst.
MJ follows up with a tirade of similar chair shots, until Cyren is flat out on his stomach, arms akimbo. He takes a look around at the audience, a glint in his eyes, then stoops to attempt a fish hook, but Cyren somehow donkey-kicks him square in the testicles! MJ can’t help but vomit a little, and his vomit lands right in front of Cyren’s face. MJ topples to his side, and Cyren stares at the puddle of vomit. He mutters to himself almost inaudibly.
“Still more attractive than your promos.”
He rises to his feet, and looks at the fallen MJ, still clutching at his testicles in pain. Cyren smokes an imaginary cigar, tipping the ash off on MJ, then starts to stomp on his head relentlessly, audibly chastising himself each time his kicks miss the mark. Soon MJ is flat out on his stomach, his head bleeding from several locations, and apparently knocked out. Cyren tucks a chair beneath MJ’s chin, making sure his head rests on the chin, then creates a triangle of chairs either side of his head. He then picks up the last remaining chair, and starts to sing to himself as he sizes up his aim.
“It's a world where the dog eats the dog
Where they kill for bones in the street
And God in His Heaven
He don't interfere
Cause he's dead as the stiffs at my feet
I raise my eyes to see the heavens
And only the moon looks down
The harvest moon shines down!“
As he finishes the final line, he swings with all his might, first smashing the chair on the right side of MJ’s head, which itself sends the left chair flying away. The first chair lands atop MJ’s head on the other side, and Cyren smashes that one too, then throws all the chairs out of the ring. MJ lies in a steadily increasing pool of blood, that bubbles each time he exhales.
Cyren pushes a ladder into the ring, and follows it up with a couple of tables. He immediately sets the ladder up in one corner of the ring, close to the announce tables. The crowd holds its breath as Cyren drags a limp MJ slowly up the ladder. As they reach the top, Cyren wraps his arm around MJ’s neck, but as he does so, MJ springs back to life, and lifts Cyren right over his head. For a moment, Cyren hangs there as if in a suplex position, but MJ doesn’t capitalise fast enough, and Cyren somehow ends up sitting on MJ’s shoulders....
REVERSE ELECTRIC CHAIR DROP FROM THE LADDER!
The crowd gasp, and ‘Holy Shit’ chants start to echo throughout the arena. MJ sits up slowly, then wiping blood from his eyes looks at the fans, as if feeling something growing. He grins widely, his teeth red with his own blood. He turns to Cyren, who has landed atop the flat tables, not yet set up. He grabs him by the nostrils, and raises him to his feet, only to drop him with a t-bone suplex, sending his body crashing against the ladder, which collapses as the weight snaps the supports in the middle. MJ immediately sets up both tables, atop each other, then just as he was dragged before, he takes Cyren to the top of the ladder...
LETHAL INJECTION FROM THE LADDER RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLES! THAT COULD HAVE BROKEN CYREN’S NECK!
Cyren is moving at all and the ref motions for the bell. This match is over. The ref declares James the winner cause Cyren can't go no more.
WINNER: MICHAEL JAMES
----
NEONERO JUST STAY HOME DAMMIT
The medics run out from the back with a strectcher bed to put Cyren in. As he's being rolled up up the ramp Neonero comes dashing down and knocks both medics to the ground. He then grabs control of stretcher and takes up to the stage area.
Steve: Oh no!!!! This is not looking good.
Rick: What is he doing....wait STOP IT!!!
Neonero just rolled the stretcher off of the stage with Cyren still strapped to it.
Steve: What is going on around here tonight. This madness is out of hand.
Rick: Look at that sadistic smile that Neonero is sporting. I never seen him like this at all. This can't be good for the XWF.
TO BE CONTINUED
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JP won't let me play with you guys and I owe Sid Feder an apology that I can't deliver because JP won't let me stay in XWF. Also, I am a major douchebag. Please pass this on.