NKWC kicks out with a twinkle in his eye, marveling over this incredible creature.

"...This is the most adorable fucking thing I've ever seen."

"It's like if Tickle Me Elmo and Hateful American Donald Trump had a baby. And that baby couldn't ride roller coasters due to height restrictions!"

"This is blowing my mind. Things your size can TALK?!?"

"Do you have a pull string? Is a ventriloquist hiding in a nearby bush? DOES THE UNITED STATES ALLOW MIDGETS TO SPEAK?!?"

"I love your little Big Wheel you've got there! Do you think in a few years you'll be ready for a big boy trike? Does it run on smiles and ice cream?"

"We have a shortage of those in my homeland, but I'm sure you get deliver some in your bike's wicker basket. Be sure to squeeze your horn so we know you're coming."

"GAH...I'm just overwhelmed. The dwarfism, the obscenities, the untreated mental illness. You're exactly like a typical North Korean child."

"It's hard not treat you like one. I just want to tussle your hair if you're a boy. Or quietly drop you down a well if you're a girl."

"How is the XWF hiring you not a violation of child labor laws?"

"Which Korean child made you? They deserve a half-day just for your conception. A whole ten hours off..."

"In North Korea, we don't have little people. I mean, we HAVE them in the medical sense? North Korean women HAVE midgets, as in rarely give birth to. But once the doctor discovers it'll never be a real boy, the birthing takes place entirely over an incinerator."

"But jeez. If I'd known smoking and drinking during pregnancy could create something this scrumptious, I would have moved to Louisiana and watched it happen to 6 out of 10 women there YEARS AGO!"

"Thank you for expanding my mind, tiny obscene friend."

NKWC picks up Jerkbeast like a beautiful newborn baby boy.

And then punts him down the stairs like a beautiful newborn baby girl.