Robbie Bourbon's partner, TJ Wallace, recently showed a video of he and Robbie meeting for the first time, and Robbie's poor attempt at scaring him. TJ Wallace needs a favor, and Robbie seems fully on board to help. First, however, is the matter of 48 Xboxes.

And an inappropriate guest.

CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON

We open scene to see Robbie driving his van. The clock reads 4:34.

How did the Microsoft stocks do?

With your viral campaign? Five dollars a share!

SELL! SELL! SELL 'EM ALL!

Blue looks at Robbie as Cyberjaw madly pushes the face of his smartphone.

Damn, hon, how many shares did you buy?

Twenty!

So, you made a hundred bucks?

Yeah!

And how much did you spend on Xbox One systems?

Oh, fifty of them, about four hundred a pop, so twenty-thousand.

So you made a profit of negative nineteen-thousand, nine-hundred dollars?

Robbie furrows his lip and begins to chew on his own mustache.

Something like that.

See, you did something nice, Robbie.

What the shit is this?

As Robbie swears, he points at something seen through the windshield. They're back at the dojo, but there's a line of police cars. An officer approaches as Robbie unrolls his window.

Sir, can I ask you to turn around please, there's a situation...

That's my building. What is happening?

The officer sighs.

Sir, there seems to be a hostage situation. About fifty kids are all being held hostage. They're drugged, and out of it, but sir, maybe you could come and see what's going on?

Robbie steps out of the van as the rest of the crew follow.

Sir, where have you been if you don't mind me asking?

I was out getting the Xboxes my dojo was giving away to these kids, my staff was keeping an eye on them, any word on them?

Sir, if any of your staff is still in there, then they're probably unconscious too. I can't believe this dick doped a couple dozen kids.

Uh, yeah, me too!

No, seriously, sir. It's literally a dick.

As Robbie and the police officer approach the barricade, we see that none other than XWF star and ex-member of Peter Gilmour, Dick of Peter Gilmour!

ROBBIE! THERE YOU ARE YOU PEICE OF SHIT! WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!?

Jesus, uh, Dick, what'd you do to those kids? Uh, I, you better not have hurt any of my staff!

There's no staff here, just the shaft! First you go around telling everybody that I don't even fucking exist. Fuck you. I'm going to kick your ass for that. Now you set me up like this?

Jesus, you don't have to be such a prick about this.

I am a prick! I am the Dick of Peter Gilmour! I do not live on him! I am a superpenis, and he's absolutely right when he says that, but even I won't touch Maria.

Look, Dick of Gilmour, what do you want? It doesn't look good, a living penis doping a bunch of kids. Did you touch them?

What? No! They're locked in that room!

Oh, thank god, they're in the safety room. Officers, I can handle this.

The officers confidently lower their pistols as Peter's Dick starts to wiggle with frustration. Robbie takes a step ahead of the barricade.

I meant no offense in saying you don't exist. I can see that you do, plain as day in front of me. However, Peter no longer has you. Peter lost his penis, and you became your own penis on that day, don't you remember?

And it's for the better. You don't want to be in a cage with me and TJ Wallace when everything is barbed wire, when there's some gobbledygook on the roof that Peter thinks is cool, and there's two vats of acid, a tank of piranha, and a tank of fire? I guess burning phone books and acetyline if I had to wager a guess, but who knows. Peter doesn't. Peter doesn't get how fire works.

I do. I love fireworks.

You don't want to be in that cage when it comes crashing down and becomes a pile of debris all around Peter and Dim as both myself and TJ lay down the beating of a lifetime on those two idiots. You definitely don't want to be in there with Dim, he'd stick you up Peter's asshole thinking that's where you go. You don't want to be in Peter's ass. That's a bad place.

Isn't it awesome, not being Peter's dick anymore, but your own penis out in the world? You can go places that Peter never would have thought to put you. My, I bet you could stowaway to any place on the globe if you just wear a pink condom and pretend you're a dildo, and you know what? Being an international dildo is a better place for you than being Peter's dick. Because Peter Gilmour doesn't have a dick. The Dick of Peter Gilmour is it's own dick.

Look, Peter's Dick, I'm sorry you feel really insulted and caught in the crossfire of all of this, what's happening between me and Peter. However, you just need to know that no matter what happens, Peter and I love you very much, and you're probably way safer being nowhere near Peter come this Wednesday.

You promise?

No. I don't love you at all. Robo-Rob, activate!

Suddenly, Robo-Rob, the robot from Rocky IV painted to look like it's wearing a Robbie Bourbon mask, bursts through the front door of the dojo holding a bucket! It drops the bucket on top of Peter's Dick, trapping it!

PENIS CONTAINED! LET'S RESCUE THOSE DISADVANTAGED YOUTH AND GIVE THEM XBOX ONES!