WORLD 7 - LEVEL 2

The scene fades into Gretchin's shack. The tiny witch sits in a rocking chair reading '50 color palettes of grey'. Her eyes scan the page as millions of pixels fly through the roof and start to build on the old wooden floor. Gretchin slams her book shut and looks up annoyed as she continues to rock back and forth. Eventually Paige manifests in the center of the shack, a smile on her face as she turns to Gretchin and is immediately smacked by a flying romantic novel. Paige's head is knocked back as she almost falls to her feet. She makes a series of annoyed, pained grunts, clutching her forehead in agony.


"What have I told you darn kids about cheat codes!? Stop it! You idiot!"

Paige pouts as she rubs the bump on her head. She puts her hands to her side looking at Gretchin annoyed.


"Geez dude. What crawled up your butt?"


"Your rudeness!"

Game Girl cocks her head to the side looking at Gretchin with a lowered brow.


"Barging in here while I'm trying to enjoy a book. I have needs Game Girl."


"Ew gross stop."


". . . What do you want GG?"


"Well- GG? Not too fond of that nickname. Anyway, I met with Gabe."


"Gabe? You mean our creator!? His name is Gabe?"


"Yeah! He said he'll try and help get Game Boy back and try and get rid of The Corruption, but it might be tough."


"Good news. Anything else?"


"The Corruption wasn't created by Funsoft, instead it's just a corruption of the game's data."


"Hm. So the problem is from an outside source. Tougher to deal with but Game Boy managed to fend it off years ago, perhaps we can deal with it."


"And that's a nice segue into something else he said. Our game is named Nirva's Sword AND there is a sword somewhere on Death Mountain that I can use to help fend off The Corruption until Gabe can get rid of it for good."


"Nirva's Sword. Hmmm. I'm not sure Game Girl, that is a heavy task. . . I don't think you're ready."


"Welllll too bad. I'm going there and getting that sword."

The two glare at each other, it's pretty intense.


"Okay."


"That was easy."


"You're clearly capable, and as I said before we can do great things."


"Radical. So how do I get to Death Mountain?"


"You could always cheat and use fast travel."

The pair stare at one another with lowered eyelids. If Game Girl's goggles didn't give her +12 fire resistance, she would be burned pretty badly by Gretchin right now. Paige shrugs of the gruesome assault of words with a smile.


"Fine, tell me the co-ordinates and I'll get the sword. :)"


"No. You do this the way it was intended."


"But why? Using codes will just get the quest done quicker and easier."


"But it'll be a hollow victory, and you need the experience. Promise me you won't cheat."


". . . Ugh fine."


"Good Game Girl. And if you go back on your promise I'll turn you into a toad."

Paige stares at Gretchin terrified for a few seconds, the witch doesn't break eye contact.


"I won't cheat. Promise."


"Grand. Death Mountain lays on the edge of the known world, past Dragon Lake, through the Valley of Torment and along the trail of the dead."


O_O


"Don't be too scared, they're just names. . .mostly. When you find the sword at the peak of Death Mountain, it will be placed on a weighted pressure plate. You need something the exact same weight so you don't trigger every trap there. But what?"

The two think in silence, making subtle humming noises to show to one another that they are actually thinking and not napping. A light bulb appears above Game Girl's head.


"Eureka! Would a Championship belt be satisfactory?"


"Above satisfactory even! Game Girl, you need to get that belt from Sebastian Duke. It will be tough, but I trust in your abilities."


"I'll do it, and if I can't do it I'll just steal it afterwards."


"Game Girl!"


"Hehe! I'm joking, chill out."


"Hmmm. Well, if you've nothing better to do you should clear the path Death Mountain. You should find save points on the journey that will allow you to rest and spawn there at your leisure.


"Good to know. Keep an eye on Urf, see what Gabe is up to."


"Spying and violation of privacy, my wheelhouse. Done and done Game Girl."


"Thanks Gretchin. Okay! Back to work."


"Best of luck GG."

Game Girl smiles politely and exits the shack waving goodbye as she does, Gretchin watches the door close and retrieves her book from the floor, continuing to read from where she left of.

---

---

---

"Vampires suck!"

"Get it?"

"Because you're a vampire or look like one. And you suck. Like, hard."

". . ."

"Okay count jackoff, let's start things slow. Set power of trash talk to a nice 30%. Let's begin shall we! This is pretty fun, I haven't actually TALKED to any of the low lives I've beaten, but you just love stalking the night and describing your every move so this should be just delightful. First of all, there are 2 very important things you need to know. One, I am not Game Boy, he was nice and a little naive, I don't have any time for your crap. So if you're expecting this fragile little girl with wide eyes to go easy on you, you have another thing coming dry bones. Two, I don't like you and I think you're more idiotic then you are 'evil'. Let's begin."

Sebastian Duke Said:It's another day and another dollar for your King of Darkness here in the Xtreme Wrestling Federation.

"This opening sentence where you begin this rant of mediocrity is so strange to me. Sebastian Duke, King of darkness, professional wrestler who took over Germany and France and who the heck cares. Just another day, another dollar homeslice. Yo maybe we can come chill at castle Wolfenstein and just rap about life. The fCENSORED are you? Going from your previous 'I vant to suck your religion' to this immediately just doesn't flow. And you harass the hard working GMs for paychecks? Dude, even I got one. Sure it was a little late but who the heck cares? YOU OWN A FREAKING DUNGEON!!! You were going to pay a dude half a million! Stop being greedy and take over Europe or whatever. Oh poor widdle Sebastian can't live if he doesn't get his measly paycheck the exact moment he sends out a promo or else he's going to throw his bottle and cry. Geez dude, what are you, like 100? 200 years old? Why is money such a big deal? You can get it anywhere, in Narfinex gold coins literally grow on some trees. Need to buy some gum? Smash a pot, sure to be some change there."

"Just add a bit of spice. Set power of trash talk to 35%. Is this what I'm up against? A dude who unironically wears leather? A lame old man who calls himself the King of Darkness and expects to be taken seriously? A guy who is the leader of some wackjob cult with the dumbest name I have possibly heard. Hehehe! Illuminatus. Jeez. Sounds like a company that goes around replacing light bulbs with faulty ones and refuses to take the blame. 'Who poorly illuminated this area?' 'Nat us.' . . . King of Darkness. Intercontinental Champion. Those titles are wasted on you."

"Actually, I want to go back to the sucking religion thing. I get that you hate the. . Catholics? Christians? I didn't do a ton of research. And you want to get rid of them, I'm guessing. But what next? You become the pope and tell everybody Christmas is cancelled? Magically abolish an entire freaking religion and dust off your hands saying 'Good job Sebastian'? What happens exactly? Because it's not going to work. You get found out, which you obviously will because you're broadcasting your steps across the planet, and you will be stopped. The whole plan is just stupid. But hey, I haven't been here long, I don't know every detail step by step and honestly in your promos there is a lot of awkward silence from you thinking about stuff instead of actually talking. I'm missing a ton of stuff here and that's partial my fault, when I find the time maybe I'll research you. OR maybe I'll spend my time wisely and help save my home."

"Also, you list these challengers for your title. Dude no wonder you're feeling overconfident, I mean these are some HUGE wins you got here. Eli James, wow, he's done literally nothing in months. Pest! What a.. Creature. Big Win. I'm joking obviously, this is a pretty weak list. Maybe the GMs don't want you to break a hip or something, just trying to ease you back into the game so to speak. Maybe nobody cares, but what do I know? But now I'm here, and I guarantee you I'm a challenge even though you're going to deny it like a stubborn child. You are a tough opponent, I can honestly say that. Do I fear you? No. Respect you? Just a tiny bit. Will I treat you the same as any other opponent? Yes."

"Now you say you got rid of Defiance, so to speak. How exactly? You beat CorVus? Bound to happen one of these days. Gator? You simply interfered in his match, if that's enough to kill a team then The Asylum would have disbanded Defiance way before you did. Justin Sane? I dunno. Austin Fernando? I dunno. But the way I see it, you didn't cause ANY of that. In my opinion you ruined what was a good match between Doctor Louis D'Ville and Gator, and if you really think that you're the true cause of Defiance's fall and disappearance, then you are clearly delusional. Do you not feel guilty saying you closed the book when you weren't even mentioned on any of the pages? Maybe that's just the type of pathetic excuse of a human being you are, taking credit for almost nothing. It was silly of me to think you were different.

Sebastian Duke Said:A competitor known as Game Girl.

Yes, that's right. Some chick from a video game or wishing she was in a video game, or something like that.

"Yes. Just wishing I was from a video game. Thinking I was from a video game. Despite there being countless evidence of me being inside of a video game world, doing things that would be impossible for a human being I just think I'm from a video game. Just like Sebastian Duke thinks he has a chance of making a big change in the world, just like Duke thinks he's a big scary monster when the only people he scares are the idiots who believe the words that come out of his mouth. Keep thinking Seb. Every thought you have is genius until it is struck down in front of your eyes."

"Oh but the King of Darkness doesn't give a damn. Not one bit, hence the reason he's making this pathetic attempt to squash my spirits. He doesn't give a damn so he's talking down to the roster, he doesn't give a damn because he's the best there is in this company holding the third, possibly fourth most important belt. But the champs, the champions, they matter. Tell me Duke, that means Muddy Waters' matters? He's on your level correct? The man holds a championship belt so he's just as good as you. Bruce Blingsteen, which by the way is an awesome name, holds the X-Treme Championship which means he is greater than you correct? D'Ville is quite clearly the best in the company since he holds the top belt, he is the top dog, he is your better. And every single person who holds the other championships has been here a fraction of the time you've been here. Does that anger you? That these dog sCENSOREDs have accomplished so much in their short time here, that while you vanished for months on end they rose to the top and out-shined you?"

"Big ol' Sebastian Duke, thinking he's the best but quite clearly being wrong. Genius idea, struck down. And were did these people start? They were the straws management grasped at. The straws that surprised people and stood up and won. I may be just a straw to an egotistical, arrogant, self adsorbed idiot of a man named Sebastian Duke. But you look like an overburdened camel to me and I'm just the right shape and size to break your back."

"Sebastian Duke."

"The false King of Darkness with no crown."

"Get over yourself and step up your game, boy."