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**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 05:51 PM** Listen up, Universal Chump. -->

Hey, Theo "Wide Open Ass For The Right" Pryce...

Listen up, gutterpunk, since you felt the need to stick your nose in business that doesn't concern you and book yourself an asswhipping at the hands of myself, Peter and Morbid, how about you make it worth our while?

Our titles are on the line next Wednesday, Theodore, so how about when you and your other two chipmunks step into the ring with us you set yours up for grabs as well?

Any of us three pin you, we win the title. You pin us, you win ours. Sounds like a fair deal to me, dude!

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 05:53 PM**

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHA! OFUCK!HAHAHAHAHAHA! DOES THIS NIGGA

THINK HE DESERVES A UNISHOT?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 05:53 PM**

"I could address this. But instead I'll let Frodo stick his nose in and watch as he makes you cry again while I go get my popcorn."

Theo looks up and sees that a remark from Frodo was just uploaded to the XWF website.

"Right on que. Gonna need extra butter for this shit. John where are you at? Bring the whiskey. This is going to be fun."

**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 05:57 PM**

Yeah, I figured you'd be too much of a pussy to accept.

Didn't think you'd decide to let your husband speak for ya, though.

**Doctor Louis D'Ville** · **11-04-2014, 06:02 PM**

The Doctor appears standing beside the Universal Champion holding a large bottle of his favorite remedy. He pulls the cap off and takes several 'glugs' from it. He holds the bottle towards Theo Pryce.

"Although my dislike for you is obvious, Mister Pryce. I am a fan of a good show. Care if I join you? I've brought the whiskey you desire.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 06:03 PM**

"Tell Theo and I what you did to deserve a Uni Shot? Peter has one. He just needs to ask for it. Morbid can probably get one by asking. But you? You're the fucking pussy who threatened to run away if he didn't get his way. Why would Theo lower himself to meet your terms? Because you'll just cry and run away if he doesn't? He'll get your title, and you'll lose what little respect you thought people had for you. You're a fucking joke, and you're not worth Theo even acknowledging. Count yourself lucky he spoke to you in the first fucking place.

Now, Theo, want some product?"

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 06:05 PM**

I see what you did there. You pulled the oldest trick in the book. "You didn't accept so that makes you a pussy."

You see the difference between me and you Pamela among the obvious that you are a little punk bitch who runs away from people who aren't tall enough to ride even the kiddie rides at Great Adventure instead of addressing him like a man is that I don't ask for title shots. I take what I want, kind of like you, except what I want is the embarrassment of others and what you want is a dick in the mouth.

Oh snap, look at that, Vinnie made a gay joke, kind of like how I just made a gay joke. Of course mine was actually entertaining and yours was just

.

Let me clue you in on something Pam, I could put my title on the line, I could give two shits about anything you have to say but why? None of you assholes will pin me. You guys lost this match the second you Pam decided to hand a title to Peter and Morbid. You might as well have handed the titles to the rotting corpses of Heath Ledger and Brittany Murphy, at least those two would just lay there dead rather than dragging you down like your partners are going to do. Now go back to crying in the corner you 5 cent gutterslut.

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 06:07 PM**

Was it something I said Doc? Why the dislike?

You know what, fuck it. Pull up a chair. Here have some popcorn. It's Orville Redenbacher Movie Theater butter. I also sprinkled on a metric fuckton of Molly McButter to make it even better. When it comes to popcorn I don't fuck around.

As for product....line em up.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 06:14 PM**

Frodo lines up several lines of his best product. By several we all know it really means more lines than a frat party.

"What's the matter, Lane? Running away because you're too fucking pussy to answer back? Or gonna cry because you didn't get your way?"

**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 06:14 PM**

Oh you want me to earn it, huh Pryce?

Tell you what, sweetboy, tune in to Madness this week and watch me decimate one of your alleged top guns. Accept or don't, dude, regardless of if it's this week or later on, that title's gonna be around this waist sooner or later.

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 06:23 PM**

I don't give a flying fuck what you do. You can earn it all you want. Beat every mother fucker on the roster for all I care. Beat them twice and then scream it from the rooftops and maybe then I'll give you a shot.

Probably not though. And do you know why?

And this part might be hard for you to understand so I'll say it slowly...

You

don't

matter.

As for Griffin McAlister. He's an alleged top gun like you are an alleged professional wrestler.

You want some of my popcorn Pam?

Say yes or you're a pussy.

**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 06:29 PM**

Ah, the old "cut a hole in the bottom of the popcorn and stick your buttery microdick in" huh? A Pryce classic. I'll leave the cummy cockcorn to Doc and your hubby there.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 06:33 PM**

"The thought of you beating Griff is hilarious as the thought of you actually managing to show up for a match involving me, you fucking pussy. Now, go show us where Theo told you to earn a shot. Ever. I'm willing to bet that I could sign my kids up for matches here and they'd get Uni shots before you. You fucking crybaby dickless pussy."

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 06:34 PM**

First you want a title shot now you're hitting on me?

You really are as high maintenance as you look.

Look Pam, there are plenty of guys here that will willingly stuff that cockholster that you call a mouth but I'm not one of those guys.

If you weren't such a bitch Frodo probably would have offered his love stick to you but I doubt he'll do it now. Frodo doesn't like bitches.

**Doctor Louis D'Ville** · **11-04-2014, 06:38 PM**

"I suppose it's not a matter of dislike as much as how disappointed I am. Disappointed that a briefcase and a master plan came between us at War Games. All is well, however, as I have much patience and surely down the road you and I will have an opportunity for another session. In the meantime, let's drink."

**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 06:39 PM**

You sure about that, champ? The little guy seems pretty drunk on your pussy juice to me.

I'm not here to talk to your trained monkey, Theo, and he knows he isn't worth a shit in any way to me. Is the fucker even housebroken?

Nah, man, I'm challenging you, the alleged big gun, but we both know you don't want that belt on the line anytime you've got the three of us across the ring from you, don't we?

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 06:43 PM**

"Are you fucking stupid? Seriously? He just fucking told you don't matter enough to get a title shot. Maybe if you weren't such a fucking

pussy. Maybe if you knew how to accept a match, instead crying about it for like 2 weeks first. Fucking dipshit."

Theo Pryce · **11-04-2014, 06:46 PM**

Trained monkey?

Now you're just being a disrespectful racist.

I hope all 5 of your adoring fans aren't listening. Wouldn't want them to get all upset and stop buying your cds on account of you being a bigot. How else are you going to be able to pay your parents that rent money you owe them if no one buys your merch?

Look, it's like this Pam, I've beaten Peter when he got a shot at the crown when I was the big gun the first time around. I beat Morbid and took his X-treme title from him and you, you're the least successful of the group so what makes you think you would do anything in the ring against me except take a beating the likes of which would make Rodney King jealous?

**Vincent Lane** · **11-04-2014, 06:53 PM**

Hey man, no problem.

You don't accept - no big deal! Not like anyone would blame you, considering you know you don't have a shot at winning next week.

I'm sure nobody will think any less of you for being a champion everywhere except the ring.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-04-2014, 06:55 PM**

"HAHAHHAHA! Oshit. He actually thinks he has a chance against you, Theo. This is the funniest thing since she tried to pass off as a man."

~~Peter Fn Gilmour~~ · **11-05-2014, 01:07 AM**

stop being a pussy theo and put that belt up. im due for my title shot

Theo Pryce · **11-05-2014, 02:56 AM**

Why the hostility Peter? I thought we were friends now? Or at least, on friendly terms.

Besides, I'm doing this for you. Don't you see that?

If I put the title on the line and then Vinnie or Morbid pin me because I would have obviously contracted some type of debilitating illness for that to happen then your title shot is gone. You will not get another one.

Is that really what you want? A match where 2 people other than you have a shot at the title?

Is that what you are telling me Peter?

The Blue Tango · **11-05-2014, 09:50 AM**

Calypso walks into the room and sees a party happening before his eyes. He's holding something behind his back and throws a thumbs up with his free hand, doing his best "Fonzy".

"Ayyyyye!! What's up, party people?? I couldn't help but notice a party going on in here! Who wants a shot??"

Calypso pulls a fifth of apple pucker from behind his back.

"Who wants apple pucker?? Plenty to go around!"

**Vincent Lane** · **11-05-2014, 09:54 AM**

I do love a good party...

You seem like a pretty cool dude, dude.

You should give that shot to Theo though - that fucker needs to loosen up.

The Blue Tango · **11-05-2014, 10:03 AM**

Calypso smiles and brushes off his shoulders.

"You think I'm cool??? I mean-- Yeah dood! I'm the coolest cat in the land!"

I'd hate to ask this, but can I have your autograph? I listen to your stuff ALL the time!

He puffs his bottom lip and a twinkle flickers from his eyes.

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-05-2014, 10:08 AM**

"Apple Pucker is a drink fitting the hugest pussy here. That's you. Always fucking trying to get what you don't deserve. Now, move the fuck along and keep hoping to whatever deity you pray to that one day you can trailer trash. Right now, you're that guy sleeping on the side of the road with a sign begging for money. The one kids throw rocks at. Theo, and me? We're the mother fuckers living it up. There's bug guts on the bottom of Groff's boot. That's higher up than you are. Do you get what you're being told, you lemon fucker, you?"

**Vincent Lane** · **11-05-2014, 10:12 AM**

For sure, dude.

You know I always carry a few of these around with me since I get asked a bunch of times a day.

You think that happens to old-stick-in-the-mud Pryce here? I'm doubtin' it!

((Loverboy produces a glossy photo from inside his denim jacket and hands it over to the slack jawed Calypso.))

~~Frodo mother fucking Smackins~~ · **11-05-2014, 10:37 AM**

"Right, former US Champion, former X Champion, longest reigning king, current Universal Champion, one of the richest people in the U.S. who happens to sleep with royalty, models, actresses, Michelle Obama if he wanted her, and he doesn't get people asking for his autograph. Or did you mean he doesn't get confused for other people? Because that one is probably true. People don't confuse Theo for anyone except for Theo fucking Pryce. Not you, though, homeless, they confuse you for other people all the time. Like Michelle Tanner. You get confused for a cracked out female child star. Seriously, bathtub. Toaster. End it."

~~Peter Fn Gilmour~~ · **11-05-2014, 05:38 PM**

i still want my title shot

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