07-17-2014, 10:59 AM
Well well well, Jessica.
Bringing out… something… I suppose. The phrase traditionally ends with ‘the big guns’ but I wouldn’t say what you’ve delivered could quite be described as a large-scale level of weaponry…
Perhaps ‘medium-sized bows and arrows’ would be a more accurate tool for this analogy…
But, still, well done! You finally brought… something… to the table, a little preview for your upcoming effort to take the X-Treme Title from my hands… You proved that you’re at least going to show up and take your beating… I appreciate that.
And yet, even with that hopeless mindset… Even with that nagging truth that there’s no chance in Hell you’re walking out of Miami the X-Treme champion.
You managed to ignore that fact. You’ve managed to block that gnawing little tidbit of information to the back of your mind.
You’ve somehow found a way to maintain the standard you set the last four months.
And underwhelm.
And fail to meet expectations.
Which, ironically, is what I expected from you based on your showing last week.
Other superstars given a title shot might try everything, might fire every bullet they have in the chamber, empty the gas tank, desperate to try to steal one when faced with impossible odds.
But, not you, Jessie.
That’s not your style. Giving it everything you’ve got? Pulling out every trick in your wheelhouse?
Isn’t a trick you have in your wheelhouse.
Extraordinarily ordinary. That’s you.
I’m sorry, but you’ve been an XWF superstar for a year. You debuted in June of 2013, 13 long months ago. You’re a former Trios champion, admittedly the belt with which it’s easiest to ride coattails, (I mean, Cam Lang held the damn thing for almost a week). But, you have some experience in the ring, is what I’m trying to say.
You’ve been around, dare I say even as a participant, in the action around these parts for some time now…
…
Shouldn’t you have hit a rhythm at this point? Shouldn’t you have some ability to create your own pace, to bring some energy to the table that someone else didn’t have to create? Shouldn’t you depend less on what your opponent brings to the table to dictate what amount of effort you bring to a match?
Follow-up question, shouldn’t you be able to put away a hopeless loser like Eddie Sheehan effortlessly any day of the week, no matter who’s wearing the black and white stripes that night?
But, nope. No taste, no style of your own. Just coasting through, hoping that whoever you’re taking on, doesn’t dig deep and push right past you. That another rookie doesn’t slip by you on the ranking list as you stagnate. As you slowly sink further and further down to the very bottom of the ladder.
When up against someone like Eddie Sheehan, a rookie with a single match under his belt, with a chance to be #1 Contender for a championship on the line, you barely put forth the effort to match him, just the bare minimum to slide by with the win. A promo the day before the match and the day of the match.
And now this week? Now that the actual belt is up for grabs? Now that you’re in a match competing in your first title shot in 4 months?!?!
…
You barely put forth the effort… To fall just below me.
Just the bare minimum to put up a fight.
A promo the day before the match. And not even a second one the day of to complement it.
No attempt to address my tearing asunder of your lack of accomplishments or your general incompetence as a professional wrestler.
No power in your voice. No fire behind your actions.
No.
Big.
Whoop.
…
Sorry, I’m not completely sure I understand this situation. I must be undereducated about how frequent these opportunities come by you. Maybe you could enlighten me.
Is this match just not on your radar? Are you just tripping over title shots, elbow deep in main event matches, that you can’t bring forth the effort to take this week seriously? Is Azrael Erebus beating down your door, trying to get you in a match for the Universal Championship so he can finally silence the throngs, the SEAS, the OCEANS of critics that say the true #1 superstar in this company, in this entire business, is Jessica FUCKING Diaz?
I can’t know for sure, but I assumed that wasn’t the case because, again, before last week YOU HADN’T WON A MATCH IN FOUR MONTHS.
Is your calendar this week just too full? Is that the problem? What with your role on Madness as ‘Not scheduled’, your role on Shove-It as ‘Not Scheduled’ and your role on next week’s Madness as ‘NOT FUCKING SCHEDULED’?!?
I’m pulling triple duty this week, Jessica. All three shows that XWF is putting out for the public’s viewing pleasure, I have a match on, one of which is against the god damned XWF Universal champion. If I win that, I get rewarded with another match. And if I win that, I finally achieve my lifelong dream of ANOTHER GOD DAMNED MATCH.
BUT THIS IS IT FOR YOU.
…
This is your big shot. This is your golden opportunity.
You (arguably) earned this chance (by winning a fixed match) to vie for the X-Treme title. The belt that is (for all its maligning, done by the overrated, arrogant ‘superstars’ that claim the thing is beneath them) the stepping stone to the big leagues. This belt is the clay with which the next generation of superstars might through which mold their future, might cement their place in the XWF Hall of Fame some day.
This belt is a weapon with no equal. This thing is a fucking blade, a god damned two-handed bastard sword, used to slice through the unbreakable rock layer that sits between any new meat just walking in the front door and the top spots in this company.
…
Does…
Does that mean nothing to you?
Are you so comfortable in your malaise, in your mediocrity, in your place trouncing the occasional rookie and failing against anyone above that level that you lack the common decency to either step up or just step out of the way?
I’m sorry. But this really was it. The pop fly that was just out of your reach… But maybe. Just maybe. If you dug deep. You could have reached out and nabbed it. You could have shocked the world. Pulled out a real miracle play. And held your first singles title in your XWF career.
…
...
Are you visualizing it?
Keep that image in your mind… Hold onto it as long as you can…
So you can feel it slowly slip away…
…
Another few seconds…
…
…
…
Instead.
You’ve proven once again you’re a lackluster talent, a bit player that is most comfortable on the second rung of the ladder.
If someone wants to go after the Trios again, you’ll happily be the third best on the team, weighing the rest of your team down as they desperately heave and sweat and exhale to carry you up the mountain, against squads that don’t have a weak link.
But as for opportunities of your own. You’re comfortable. Right where you are. At the bottom.
Right where you belong…
…
I’ll admit though. I don’t want to undersell the selling point of this main event. This one will be one for playing and replaying, this one will make highlight reels for the rest of XWF history… As predictable as this match is. As unsurprising as it will be when I reign superior over you and walk away the X-Treme champion after my second title defense this week… There is one thing I must admit I’m quite excited about. One thing I’d like to remind all the XWF fans around the world that are tempted to just skip tonight’s main event, read the results the day after the fact and say ‘Yup. Thought so.’
There’s one major attraction, one incredible visual aspect that will have to be seen to be believed about Warfare’s big X-Treme Title match.
THERE’S ONE REASON THAT EVERY FUCKING PERSON WATCHING THE MAIN EVENT TONIGHT SHOULD SET THEIR GOD DAMNED DVR TO RECORD SO THEY DON’T MISS HISTORY BEING MADE…
…
That reason?
That reason is Jessica Diaz’s big finish. Her ‘match-ender’…
The Lost Cause…
That Lightning Lock Beta maneuver…
OOH That’s a fun one. Has my heart racing just thinking about it… A personal favorite of mine…
And while I can’t say looking back about halfway through your career that I can find a case where you used it… I’m very excited about it… I’ve been in this business a long time… And I’ve only encountered it on a handful of occasions… Which is a damn shame…Because it might be my favorite thing in the whole wide world...
To counter.
I don’t feel like you’ve really studied my work much, Diaz, based on how little you understand the psychology I’m bringing in with me…But that’s my game… That’s my pride and joy… That’s my favorite thing to do in the ring…
Bring someone right up to the edge of success…Just let them reach out… And brush against the victory they want more than anything with their fingertips…
And then crush their hands. Break the bones in every finger… And take the thing they want for myself, as they lie on the ground, useless…
And this match is no exception.
The only difference? Breaking out of a Death Valley Driver, twisting in a behemoth’s loose grip and calculating position and pressure points in a modified octopus stretch from atop my opponent’s shoulders? Child’s play.
Twisting out of a Canadian Destroyer, bringing down the weight of my thighs at just the right moment to trap my opponent to the mat, then latch onto his shin as it soars through the air and twisting it until he can’t breathe, his entire arm desperately beating the mat in prayer for the pain to stop? A parlor trick.
But that Lightning Lock Beta? Oh, I’m excited.
That requires the perfect mixture of technique and skill. Poetry in motion. The equivalent of a magician freeing himself from an underwater tank as he simultaneously saws a woman in half.
And to accent the spectacle. To not give away the prestige of the trick…
I’m keeping the solution to this riddle to myself…
I usually hand my opponent a little diagram of my counter, then walk them through it step-by-step so those slow minds in the crowd can see how even when they know what’s coming. Even when told in the most excruciating detail how they’ll lose in the end.
That there’s no chance they’ll be able to fight it.
Like fate. Mark Flynn winning is just nature. Pointless to fight against, impossible to stop. Like the sun setting in the west.
But this time? I don’t want that audience to understand how I pulled the trick. I don’t want them to understand the mechanics of this switch. I want them to think you might actually have it. I want them to lose themselves in the moment.
So that the moment your grip fails. The instant in time that my arm wraps around your shoulder…
The nanosecond that your hand first makes contact with the mat… Begging for mercy.
They don’t think, ‘wow, what a trick.’ They wonder how the Hell that even happened. As if I’d broke the laws of physics. As if I’d bent the principles of time and space. To achieve something as simple.
As beating Jessica Diaz.
This counter leading directly into victory? Will be my fucking masterpiece. Will serve as a blazing sign in the sky of my official return to the top of the XWF.
…
There is one thing I can reveal though, about this upcoming Main Event, Diaz… A little taste of a spoiler…
Just for you.
This coming Warfare? If you go for broke and try to lock in that Lightning Lock Beta? If you decide to step through that trapdoor I'm going to open for you and try to utilize that ‘Lost Cause’ submission of yours?
I’m going to make it clear that the only ‘Lost Cause’ in the ring...
Is you.
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