Vincent Thornbird appears on the screen, dressed in a solid black armani suit. His black hair slicked black, smoking a cigar, he is the picture of a business man. After all, he has the Japan's greatest export standing behind him, dressed in a black robe, with a straw jingasa hate on his head, his head bowed. Thornbird smirks as he begins to speaks.

Vincent: Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Vincent J. Thornbird, and I am the business manager of "The Fire Demon". His name is Yamato, and no, he doesn't speak English because he refuses to learn it. Why? He thinks that it would make a purebred Japanese Warrior such as himself sound...well...stupid.

Now, onto why we are here. My client wishes to climb to the top of the XWF roster. He lives for competition, as he was born to fight.

However, you should be warned, Yamato is the most dangerous entity walking "his" green earth. Some say that he is the Devil's own personal weapon of destruction.

With that being said, I ask you all....who will be his first victim?

All men have fear, and you men are no different. But my Yamato? He is a demon. And he is hungry.

Perhaps if you fed that poor sweatshop escapee a Snickers now and then he wouldn't be so hungry.

Doesn't speak English because it's "below" him. Hires a speaker who does speak English on his behalf. Allow me to be the first volunteer to take on this faux "dangerous man" and reveal to everyone that he is in fact, the opposite of what you claim him to be.

The Swaggins brothers walk up to the scene escorted by Crack and Aldous respectively. Crack is first to speak.

"As you know, my Client, Mr. Frodo Smackins, The King of the Dwarves, Lord of the Lumberjacks, and Sultan of Short People, has recently returned from the dead. After Miss Sawyer rapes your client with a steel chair to the asshole, Frodo would like to take Yamato in a fight. Not just any fight. Extreme Hell in a Cell. Accept or be branded a coward."


"My name is Aldous, and my Cliet, Swaggy Swagmire Swaggins, holds no fancy title, But after he brother and Kendall eviscerate you, he would like to face you in a buried alive in shit and semen match. Do you accept, or are you but a coward? Swag, I Radio Love you."

Vincent: Hey, ya put the bait out and all the coyotes show their ugly snouts. They all start howling, and quite loudly if I do say so myself.

That is heat, people. Heat only a fire demon like Yamato can generate. I mean sure, he doesn't speak English because he believes it is below him. He is pure bred Okinawan. However, Miss Sawyer, I assure you that I am not. So he, we, accept your challenge. We accept the challenge of a simple woman who lives with what appears to be a manically depressed roomate.

Doctor Honkey, you dare make light of the most dangerous man in America? We will disregard you for now.

As for YOU, Frodo Smackins, after my client decimates Miss Sawyer, he would more than love to destroy your dwarven self in this extreme environment.

Last, and certainly least, Swagmire...

Who do you think you are?

Vincent points at Yamato who stands like a statue, head bowed.

Vincent: This, my boy, is a world class fighter. An extreme warrior of the highest caliber. He doesn't wallow in feces and semen, you plesbian. So your challenge, lacking class and professionalism is not accepted. I spit on your jest. This is business, boy. Not the twisted sexual fantasy of a moronic pervert.

Thornbird spits on the floor, signifying his disrespect of Swagmire.

Only Swagmire and Aldous decide to speak up this time. Crack and Frodo have walked off in glee.

"See, Aldous, this is what I had previously mentioned. This clown wants to make it in the XWF, but he thinks he's too good for one of the staple matches here. A match our King won his crown in, sort of. Pussy."

"Guess you were right. Then Zipperheads are pussies."

(03-18-2014, 11:40 AM)Yamato Said: Vincent: However, Miss Sawyer, I assure you that I am not. So he, we, accept your challenge. We accept the challenge of a simple woman who lives with what appears to be a manically depressed roomate.

Comedically missing the point? No, that would require you to actually be funny. Glad to see that you've accepted. Pick a Madness. Any Madness. It's like a magic trick, though every outcome will be the same. Your client getting humbled. Sorry for deflating the sense of pride you helped him develop, but deceiving someone who lacks the ability to learn a foreign language is just too cruel for my little heart to handle.

El Tiburón sobs into an open dictionary.

"Lo siento señor Vicente, pero what is this 'plesbian' you speak of? I look and I look, but this word I can no find. Did you mean lesbian? Como se dice... Carpetmuncher?"

(03-18-2014, 12:57 PM)El Tiburón Said: El Tibúron sobs into an open dictionary.

"Lo siento señor Vicente, pero what is this 'plesbian' you speak of? I look and I look, but this word I can no find. Did you mean lesbian? Como se dice... Carpetmuncher?"

"He meant Plebian. He's just not good at being clever."

"I speak French, but I do not think of myself higher then anyone who won't speak it. This man a fool and the fact that the person who speaks for him has the same name as me just makes my head throb. Take your client and leave. Your words make me want to throw up, seeing that I can't. It's best you leave and never come back."