Tarantula
a wolf spider (Lycosa tarentula) of S Europe, whose bite was popularly but wrongly supposed to cause tarantism
any of numerous large, hairy spiders with a poisonous bite that usually has little effect on warmblooded animals; specif., any of a family (Theraphosidae) found in the SW U.S. and tropical America

Origin: ML < It tarantola < Taranto, near which the wolf spider was found.


noun pl. ta·ran·tu·las or tarantu·lae

Any of various large, hairy, chiefly tropical spiders of the family Theraphosidae, capable of inflicting a painful but not seriously poisonous bite.
A large wolf spider (Lycosa tarentula) of southern Europe, once thought to cause tarantism.

Origin: Medieval Latin, from Old Italian tarantola, after Taranto.


Just so you know what will be waiting for you inside that casket.




Death Merchant (speaking into the phone)
Yeah, The old warehouse out by the forest preserve. Find out who owns it and how much it will take to get it off his hands. I have some ideals for the place I think will work and do some good at the same time. I want that info yesterday, Get it, Got it, Good!


He hung up the phone and turned back towards his computer. He had checked the XWF website for a word from Elisha but he hasn't crawled out from under his rock yet. He clicked over to check the results of the NASCAR race at Michigan. Of course Jimmie Johnson's bad luck there continued. Oh well, At least he still had the point lead. He was about to log out and call it a night when he noticed he had a new message. He opened it and read it 'Meet me at the warehouse in ten minutes. Done deal!'


He closed out the message and shut down his computer. Things were looking up. This would solve a few problems. He was out the door and driving down the road in less than five minutes. When he pulled up to the warehouse Night Rider was standing with an elderly gentleman of about 62 who looked about as happy as a kid at Christmas. Death Merchant walked over and shook hands with him.


Greeves
Glad to meet you sonny. I've been trying to sell this place for some time now. No one wants to touch it because they say it could be haunted. I can't say for sure myself. I signed the contract as soon as he told me about it. I hope you can do something with the place, She's a historical landmark. Been there all my years and then some. Still in good shape though.


Night Rider
I checked over the contract and everything is in order at the price agreed upon. The workers will start fixing it up tomorrow morning. Stormy and her brother and sister are staying in the trailer over there. All the comforts of home. Eve has even hired a house maid to take care of them. She's really been on top of things.


Death Merchant
Awesome work, I knew I could count on you. At least that much is coming along. I hate it when $h!t just drags out. I want it to be Wednesday so bad already I can't stand it. I don't know, There's just something about that guy that rubs me the wrong way. I just plain don't like him!


Night Rider
I know, I don't care for him either. If I wasn't retired........


Death Merchant
If you weren't retired you and I would be the deadliest tag team around. Why don't you come out of retirement?


Night Rider
Are we going to go through this again? Why can't you just let things be and let me come back at my own time? I had a steel plate implanted in my skull. A skull that was fractured in three places.


Death Merchant
Your the dumb @$$ who tried to headbutt someone from the top of the cage. Jimmy Snuka your not brother!


Night Rider
I saw that sucker being pulled out of the way and first I thought it and then I did it. The next thing I know I'm waking up in recovery and it's three days later. That's why I always wear my bandana to cover the scar. I thought about having something tattooed over my skull to cover it up.


Death Merchant
You know your one hundred percent now. You could come back at any time. Just whenever your ready brother. Listen, I'll go finalize a couple things on my end and go have this notarized. Thanks again Greeves. Best of luck to you.


Greeves
The same to you young man. Take care of the lady and she'll take care of you.


Death Merchant
I'll take care of the building too.


The old man laughed as Night Rider drove him home. Death Merchant dropped the papers off with Eve at her request and decided to stop and have a drink or two. He pulled into the parking lot of a place called 'Juke Box Saturday Night' When he walked in the place was jumping with a band playing some song from the 70's that he vaguely remembered.


A waitress who wore a pair of shorts that showed off more than they covered and a shirt that you could see right through walked up and asked him if he would like anything. He smiled and thought twice before saying what first crossed his mind and asked for a Jack and Coke instead. He made his way over to an empty table and sat down. It was good to be able to relax for a change and have a drink in peace.


The waitress walked up to him with his drink and smiled as she handed it to him.


Evangeline
If you need anything else at all just let me know. My name is Evangeline. Your not from around here are you?


Death Merchant
They call me Death Merchant. I will be from time to time now. I'm a wrestler with the XWF and we have our shows not far from here. Plus, I just purchased the old warehouse out by the forest preserve.


Evangeline
Oh man, I heard some weird stories about that place.


Death Merchant
Yeah? Can you fill me in a little bit?


Evangeline
Sure can. That place used to be a saw mill at one time. Until one day a blade broke off and came screaming down the ramp. It went through one guys neck and nearly cut his head clean off. Then it went all the way through one guys leg and half way through the other. The place was closed down and the owner went bankrupt. A local grocery chain bought it and turned it into a warehouse. When they went out of business old man Greeves bought it at an auction for a dollar. No one else would touch it. They say the two men who died there run through the place screaming in agony. A sound that would send a chill to your bones.


Death Merchant
Sounds like a great place to me. I'm going to fix it up and turn it into a homeless shelter.


Evangeline
You must have ran into Stormy. Her brother, Thunder and her sister Chrissy, Short for Christmas, Her middle name is actually Snow. I help them out from time to time when tips are going good. Sometimes the cheapskates around here expect you to run your @$$ off for nothing.


Death Merchant
Stop back by again so we can talk a bit. I could use another drink.





He winked at her and she smiled as she turned back towards the bar. The band began playing 'Wonderful Tonight' as he watched her walking away. She sure knew how to move what she had. Her long Red hair had such a shine to it you would swear it glowed. Those bright Blue eyes of hers had burned themselves in his memory. That full luscious smile that spoke of hidden promises.


He finished his drink just as she was bringing his second one to the table. He handed her a c-note and told her to keep them coming. He smiled as he looked in her eyes.


Death Merchant
There will be a little bonus before I leave. Listen, Are you involved with anyone?


Evangeline
Wow, You just get right to the point don't you? I like that. A guy that knows what he wants and goes for it. No, I'm not involved with anyone. Up until yesterday I was working and going to school so I didn't have time for anything else. I graduated the other day and finally finished my Associates Degree in Business Management. Working here was what got me through it though. Now I'm ready to move on.


Death Merchant
Well, Congratulations are in order. Listen, I might have a proposition for you.


Evangeline
Would that be personal of professional?


Death Merchant
Why not both? How would you like to be my business manager for the 'New Horizons' Homeless Shelter. That's what I am turning the warehouse into. We could have dinner tomorrow evening and discuss it further?


Evangeline
I would love to. I'm staying at the Roadside Motel just down the street. Room 23. You can pick me up at six and we will "Discuss things".


He smiled as she wrote down the information along with her phone number. She definitely did look 'Wonderful Tonight'


He had a few more drinks and they talked a little more until it was time to go. He walked her out to her car and made sure she was okay before heading back to his Hotel. He lowered the visor above him to grab the pack of smokes there when a huge Tarantula dropped into his lap. He smiled as he recognized the one from before that had crawled up his arm. It looked up at him as if it were smiling. Death Merchant picked it up and placed it on his shoulder. They rode the rest of the way just like that.


The looks he got when he walked into the lobby were priceless. If only he had brought his camera. Everyone took one look at the spider and avoided him like he had the plague. The Spider loved it as he jumped up and down menacingly to entice them. Death Merchant got a kick out of it and couldn't help but laugh all the way to the elevator. The bell hop on the elevator didn't even bother asking what floor he wanted. He promptly ran out of the elevator and said something about taking the stairs from now on.


The hallway on his floor was empty and when he opened his door he could tell the maids had already come and gone for the day. He placed the Spider on the headboard above where he would sleep and dimmed the lights. After washing up and changing into a pair of shorts he climbed into bed. He dozed off looking at the wonderful web the spider had already spun above him.


He had a weird dream. He was at a press conference, Like he was running for some kind of office. The microphones were everywhere in front of him as reporters shouted questions.


Reporter One
Why haven't we heard from your competition?


Reporter Two
Is He ducking you?


Reporter Three
Do you think he's afraid of spiders?


Death Merchant
Yes, Yes, And I quote, Yes! The guy is ducking me because he knows I will tear him up in any kind of debate he could think of. The guy is showing his true colors. Elisha knows that he is nothing but a coward. He can't handle this right here! Spiders are the least of his worries. He gets to step up against a monster who could take him out of the game any time he wants. I could destroy you Elisha, Fix it so you never do what you do again. Leaving you hiding under that rock that you call home.


Death Merchant sits up in bed as the knocking on the door gets louder. He gets up and grabs his robe as he opens the door.


Richard Cranium
I'm sorry for bothering you at this hour but it is 'daylight'


Death Merchant looked out and could see the sun rising on the horizon. He looked at the clock on the wall and could see that it wasn't even six in the morning yet. He grabbed Dick Head by the shirt and held him up against the door jam.


Death Merchant
This had better be good or I am going to make you a part of the wood work.


Richard Cranium
Sorry, I just flew in from O'Hare in Chicago. My system is all out of whack.


Death Merchant
Your whole body is going to be out of whack if you don't come up with something better than that. I bet your one of the few Elisha fans aren't you? You even look like you just crawled out from under a rock yourself. I should beat the $h!t out of you just for the hell of it!


Richard Cranium
Come on, You and I go way back. You give Sayors an interview but you can't give me one. You know I can't stand Elisha. My clothes look like this because of the long flight. I had some damn kid keeping me awake the whole way by kicking the back of my seat. Not to mention the fat @$$ sitting next to me who must have eaten a pan full of butter beans before flying, He just kicked. The guy had the whole plain smelling like @$$.


Death Merchant began to detect the faint odor and released the guy. He stood there for a moment and just shook his head,


Death Merchant
Come on in and I'll give you ten minutes. After that you get the hell out of here and I'm going back to bed!


Richard Cranium walked in as Death Merchant sat down at the desk in front of his computer and turned to face him.


Richard Cranium
Still no response from Elisha since you posted your last video. Why do you think that is?


Death Merchant
I would hope that the guy is taking the time to work out and get himself into shape. Or maybe getting his personal affairs in order. Actually, I think he's hanging out at the soup kitchen looking for a date. I hear those homeless women will go out with anyone.


Richard Cranium
Seriously though, Despite his silence. How do you think you will match up against Elisha in the ring?


Death Merchant
All BS aside, Elisha is one competent competitor and will give it everything that he has. The only problem is, It's not going to be enough. He may be Six Foot Two and Two Hundred and Thirty Five pounds but I'm going to knock him down to midget size by the time I am done with him. Guys like him just make me sick. He is nothing but a disgrace to the sport of wrestling. This guy is even worse than the 'Missing Link'. I'm Bigger, I'm stronger, And I'm quicker than you would think. One other thing, I'm one crazy son of a b!t@#! You don't want to piss me off. Go ahead, Open your mouth and show everyone your real intelligence level. That way you remove all doubt as to how dumb you actually are.


Richard Cranium
How do you feel about this being a Tarantula Casket Match?


At that moment Richard Cranium jumped back as the spider crawled from behind Death Merchants back and stood on it's hind legs as if on cue.


Death Merchant
As far as the casket goes, I have no reason to fear them. There is nothing a casket can do that can hurt me. My little friends here though, They can inflict a little damage. say hello to my friend Damien. You should ask Elisha that question. That is, If you can find him. See if any carnivals are in town and if they hired a circus freak recently. He may have just decided it wasn't worth facing me. Nah, He's not that smart. Listen, I'm tired. Bottom line is this. I am ready for whatever Elisha has to throw at me. I don't give a $h!t what he is doing or how he is spending his time. It won't matter one damn bit when we step into that ring, Not that we will stay there long. I look to take the action outside right away and pound his head against the ring post a few times. Kind of get things flowing if you know what I mean. Elisha will regret the day he ever had to face me. I'll beat him so bad he'll wake up tomorrow thinking he's a banker and his biggest client closed his account. The end is near Elisha, The vultures are hovering above you.


He signals for Richard Cranium to stop filming and quickly escorts him to the front door. He could still get a couple hours of sleep. He crawled into bed and was about to doze off when the telephone began to ring. He looked at it and shook his head. Reaching out he grabbed it and picked it up. He promptly threw it across the room and fell asleep.