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Sahara · (06-22-2024)

Dear Thaddeus,

I’m not much for writing letters, but I fear if I did this in person, you’d try to talk me out of it with any number of excuses or apologies... Then we’d fuck and go on pretending all is well in Paradise Ridge.

Well… I don’t want excuses and I sure as hell don’t want apologies.

God knows I’ve already had a lifetime of both.

And we both know all is not well.

I’m not surprised. I always knew we’d end up here. It’s why when I first arrived, I didn’t bother to unpack what little I had.

What was the point?

This is just another inevitable fork in my road.

I always knew we were a glass house… and it was just a matter of time before it shattered. Look on the bright side… a lotta people are gonna be happy as hell this finally happened. They’re always happier when I’m not. You’re free again. I guess they’re right when they say some birds aren’t meant to be caged… they're just too colorful.

I see the way you look at Dolly. It’s a longing you no longer have for me. As with everything in life, time marches on, and I’ve come to realize I’m no longer the light in your eyes.

Maybe I never was.

Some of us aren’t meant for happy endings, especially us Mackay’s.

You can deny it if you want, but that won’t make it go away.

I can, however, make her go away.

If I can’t be the light in your eyes… then there will be no light at all.

I want you to know before the world does that I’m coming to the XWF for Dolly Waters.

I’m gonna hurt her, and I’m gonna make her hurt me... because I know that’ll hurt you.

This ain’t about titles.

It ain’t even about winning.

It’s about the world of pain I’m gonna bring down upon your little snack cake.

Tell the kids whatever love is left in my heart belongs to them.

I wish you could love me like you used to… but maybe this was meant to be.

Sincerely,

Lauren Mackay

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