The Nickleman sits atop a candycane throne in the main hall of a life-sized ginger bread house. Vines of licorice hang down from the ceiling, serving as nooses, as 31 blonde headed bitches swing from side to side. The Nickleman grins like a mad fucking dog, A REAL ONE, not the new guy who's just taken the name!


This is where we're putting all our deleted and cut content from March Madness, right? So we can save it and sell it to the fans as 'bonus content' when we release the DVD version? 

Right? 

Fuck it, I don't care, I'm doing it anyways! 

The Nickleman exhales sharply as he leans forward in his candy throne. 

Blondie's a stupid fucking cunt that's about to get bled, stuffed, and then dried the fuck out. He can talk all day about Pascal's wager but if Blondie was a smart man, he wouldn't bet on himself making it to the second round! He may be a new favorite from the management, but who gives a fuck what they think? 

NO ONE!  

The Nickleman shouts as he flings his arms out at his sides. As he does so, the vines and the bodies both drop to the floor. The wonky scene brings a smile to Charlie's face. 

Blondie's new around here tho, so I figured before I really bury the son of a bitch's career I should at least give him a warm welcome and a fair shot. After all, it's not everyday that your XWF career comes to a screeching fucking halt. 

And even though Blondie's the new kid on the block, the lil' guy still deserves to be prepared. He needs to make a will, he needs to make a testament, he needs to get right with God- and he doesn't have much time to do it all. 

He's got what, a week and some change left until it's over? Until he has to square off against the 2-time TV champ, former tag AND supercon champ, aka the reigning Heavymetalweight champion in the flesh? 


Eesh, what a bad draw for the kid. But alas, I'm just the messenger and the executioner: so you really can't hold me responsible for what's going to happen inside that ring. 

The Nickleman pulls out a list of names that's longer than Santa's naughty or nice list! 

But don't feel bad, kid, because you won't be the first name I etch onto a tombstone. 

Won't be the last name either. 

Caedus, Granger, Lynx, Champ Sportsman, Lycana..... you'll be in great company, Blondie. 

But it won't be in this company....not after I'm done with you. 

The Nickleman glares into the camera before he leans back in his chair and looks off to the side. He waves the camera away with a fling of the hand.

Now beat it, bitches! This Bastard's got to get to work for real...my Devil Hooks don't sharpen themselves, you know!

The camera fades to black on our wonky candy scene as The Nickleman steps off the candy throne.