TO DETERMINE THE FIRST EVER XWF MADNESS LORD OF VIOLENCE...
AN IMPLODING CONDEMNED BUILDING LAST MAN STANDING MATCH!
THRAX
JACKI O'LANTERN
DARREN DANGEROUS[/mad]
[mad]
TO DETERMINE ONE OF TWO CONTENDERS FOR THE GEMINI TITLES...
A 5-TEAM GAUNTLET MATCH!
THE BING BONG TWINZZ
BGTL
2 BROKE CHICKS
TEAM KTFO
THEMIS PALAESTRA[/mad]
AND OF COURSE
[mad]
FOR THE IDL CHAMPIONSHIP...
A ONE NIGHT, 8-PERSON SINGLE ELIMINATION TOURNAMENT![/mad]
Hello hello! Marv Smegma here… I’ve got your exclusive Madness backstage interviews as well as ALL the rumors surrounding the XWF… which you can hear all about just by dialing our 1-900 HOT tipline! Don’t miss it!
PRE-SHOW DARK MATCHES:
Johnny Miami def. Joey Oddjobs Via Miami Vice (Match Time 8:43)
Homer “The Humanoid” Sapien def. Bridget “Big Sky” Bullet Via Predator’s Claw (Match Time 11:04)
The Disintigrators def. The Big Upps via Total Disintigration (Match Time 3:18)
Pre-Show Main Event:
Chris “Doc” Docherty def. Ruckus via Genocide Kick (Match Time 13:07)
The cameras jump backstage to the parking lot where a tricked out RV with a black body paint job, accented in bright neon blue flames rolls into the arena. Kanye West’s “Mercy” blasts from inside on the stereo system, loud enough to clearly be heard from outside the vehicle. A random backstage attendant goes passing by the front as the RV pulls to a stop when he’s startled by the custom installed airhorn, causing him to jump out of fright. The music lowers and a high pitched, female cackling can be heard from the speakers up top. Like someone’s laughing hysterically through a microphone.
Chiaki Sanada: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! FUCK OUT DA WAY MUTHABISH!!!
The music cuts off, the engine shuts down and a moment later, the side door to the RV flies open and just a cloud of white smoke pours out from the interior. Two women come out from the mobile home. The first being a short Japanese woman with her black hair dyed a metallic blue, dressed in baggy black pants with little chains dangling around her legs, a pair of boots that add three inches to her short stature and a hooded jacket over a simple black sport bra top, showing off her heavily tattooed midsection and upper chest. She has more tattoos around the border of her face which we see once she pulls her black bandana down from around her face and let’s it rest around her neck. She lifts her tinted goggles up onto her head and we see just how goddamn wild her eyes are as she looks around them. She throws her arms out, one hand clutching a wooden bokken practice sword in hand and gives an excited little twirl.
Chiaki Sanada: KYAAAAAAAAGH!!! Tōchaku shimashita! Exxu Dubyu Effu!! 2 Bee Cee here!! WE IN DIS BISH!!!
Chiaki “Chi Chi” Sanada feigns a lunge at the camera, making the camera man jerk back a bit. Chi Chi gives a wide, toothy grin and giggles. From inside of the RV, you can hear the laughter of another woman before she steps out of it, wearing a baggy pair of cargo pants that hang off her waist a little bit, a red sports bra, and her hair up in a ponytail. On her stomach and neck, you see tattoos along with her arms and two gauges in her ears with big, gold hoops hanging from them. She has a pair of Timberland boots on as she walks up beside Chiaki, putting an arm around her. Chiaki returns the gesture, putting an arm around Jane’s waist and tucking her thumb into the waistline of her pants.
Jane Harper: Damn right! We’re in THE XWF, Cheech! I can’t believe it! This place is the fuckin big time! I grew up watchin Monday Massacre, Thursday Anarchy, and Saturday Impact! I watched em all! I can’t believe we get to step inside of the ring that so many of the best to ever do this stood in. Men and women like Centurion, Roxy Nova, James fuckin Raven, Superballs, The Brand, Ranma Saitome. There’s so many to name that I can’t name em all or else we’d be here all damn day!
It was clear Jane was excited not only for the chance for her and Chiaki to continue their short, but impactful journey in the wrestling business, but the fact that it was in a place she grew up watching and being such a huge fan of. She squeezed Chiaki and she kissed the woman on the cheek.
Jane Harper: This is gonna be one the greatest nights of our lives, Cheech.
Chiaki Sanada: THE greatest! Number one! Ichiban!
Chiaki keeps her unsettling grin as she stares into the camera, leaning in against Jane.
Chiaki Sanada: We 2 Bee Cee! Two Broke Chikku! Draw eyes! Win gold! Kick ass errywhere we go! Dubyu Dubyu Ayy! Ess Cee Yuu! Bee Dubyu Effu! SCUM! Now time for Exxu Dubyu Effu!
Chiaki lets go of Jane and steps forward, grabbing the lens of the camera to pull it closer to them
Chiaki Sanada: Tonight! Run gauntlet!! Greek bishes!! Bee Gee Tee Ell! Kay Tee Eff Oh!! We bust heads and break knees!! Bing Bong Twinz want smash? SMASH YOU NUTS!!! FAKK YOU LIFE! BING BONG!!!
Chiaki throws up a middle finger with a heavily tattooed hand and brings her bokken to rest on her shoulder as she steps back, giving Jane the floor. Jane steps right behind Chiaki, resting her hands on the woman’s shoulders and looks right into the camera. The smile fades from her face as she gets much more serious.
Jane Harper: It don’t matter who the fuck gets put in front of the 2 Broke Chicks. Every single place we’ve stepped foot into, we’ve walked out with gold around our waists. We are the real fuckin deal in the world of tag team wrestling. We ain’t just two great tag team wrestlers, we’re two crazy ass bitches who can get down and dirty and hood on your asses. We done it all from deathmatches to straight up tag matches and at every single fuckin turn, we have our hands raised in victory. XWF, it ain’t gonna be no different either. We’re gonna walk into that gauntlet match tonight, beat the hell out of the rest of these damn teams, especially those two jokes, The Bing Bong Twinz, they need an extra couple of kicks and maybe, just maybe I’ll let Cheech pop a couple bottles tonight with them. You want that Cheech?
Hearing this makes Chiaki’s eyes go wide with glee. She looks up and back at Jane, nodding excitedly, her pigtails swaying as she grins back at the camera and reaches into the assortment of chains and other jewelry around her neck, picking out the bottle opener necklace from among the rest. She wiggles it at the camera.
Chiaki Sanada: Bing Bong Twinz pop bottles with Chi Chi?
Her demeanor grows darker than it’s already been as she begins to giggle. Impishly. She clamps her teeth down on the bottle opener as her giggling grows a full on fit.
Chiaki Sanada: Maybe camera-kun pop bottles too?
The camera’s perspective inches back as Chiaki inches forward, closer and closer. She suddenly breaks into a full on deranged laugh as she lunges at the cameraman. The perspective of the camera drops to the floor at an angle where we can see the cameraman tearing ass down the hall as fast as his feet can carry him. Hot on his heels, Chiaki Sanada sprints right after him.
Chiaki Sanada: CHI CHI TAKE TEEFIES!!!!!
The camera is then lifted and aimed upwards with Jane Harper now holding it as she looks right into the lens.
Jane Harper: Seeya out there, bitches.
Jane looks to be trying to find a way to turn the camera off before she decides to just set it back down the way it was before she picked it up and we see her go running off down the hall after her tag partner and the cameraman trying to escape her wrath.
Jane Harper: YO, CHEECH! GET THE FUCK BACK HERE!
We hold here before the shot cuts to static then away to another part of the show.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the very first edition of XWF MADNESS! My name is Jacuinde and I am honored to be here alongside my broadcast partner, Ira Saltzmann!
That’s “Bath” Saltzmann, Jacuinde! And I am STOKED for tonight! Right out the gates Madness is crowning its champion on DAY FREAKIN’ ONE! And someone’s gonna have to go through three grueling matches to get it done!
Not to mention a five team elimination gauntlet match to determine one of the two teams that will square off down the line for the Gemini Titles!
Oh and did we forget to mention the IMPLODING BUILDING that’s happening later on? To determine the first EVER Lord of Violence of the XWF!
We’ve already told them too much, Bath… let’s get this party started with some words from the competitors we’ll be seeing here tonight!
Somewhere in the venue, right before the show properly kicks off, we meet Molly Barnes. She’s got an ‘Alrite’ t-shirt or ten draped over her arm, and is addressing the fans walking by her. Most don’t seem to recognize her, and those that do probably couldn’t care less.
Molly:"Alrite, lads? Fancy a t-shirt? Only twenty quid, innit?"
As the fans just walk by without really acknowledging her, Molly backpedals along with them, trying to change their minds.
Molly:"Come on, mate. Tenner? Fiver?"
To no avail. Eventually Molly just gives up, and mutters something under her breath.
Molly:"Cheap bastards!"
She sighs, but just as she is about to try again, Marv Smegma pops up next to her, armed with a microphone and camera crew.
Marv: “Hey there, Molly. Shouldn’t you be preparing for the IDL tournament?”
Molly seems rather annoyed by the question.
Molly:"Alrite mate? Think I’m standing here for me own amusement, flogging me own t-shirts? I’ve got a leaky roof back home, and me nan’s gotta change the buckets every four hours while I’m out. I’m just trying to get a bit of cash so I can afford it. Don’t think I’d rather be backstage right now getting ready for Elijah Copeland, but I’ve got priorities, mate."
Marv: “But why are you selling your own t-shirts? There’s merchandise stands everywhere, and don’t you get a profit share?”
Molly:"Profit share? You don’t see that money for ages, mate. Tried talking to Vinnie about it and all he said was ‘the money’s in the pot’. What’s that supposed to mean? ‘It’s in the pot’. Bloody good that’ll do me while me roof’s as leaky as a faucet."
Marv: “Faucets aren’t meant to leak.”
Molly:"Well, mine do. Another thing I gotta get fixed, which is my I’m out here, innit?"
Marv: “But where did you get the t-shirts from?”
Molly nodded over to the merchandise stands a bit further down the venue.
Molly:"Nicked some from over there, innit? They’re me own bloody shirts after all."
Marv raised an eyebrow.
Marv: “So you stole them is what you’re saying? From the merchandise stand?”
Molly:"They’re MY SHIRTS, Marv! Look, it says ‘Alrite?’, innit?"
She held up one of the shirts, but Marv was not impressed. He held up a finger.
Marv: “… wait right here.”
He quickly walked off, leaving Molly alone. The Salford Supernova shrugged, and went back to flogging.
The scene is peaceful and serene - an oceanside view, complete with the sights and sounds of birds soaring overhead and descending to the shoreline. The wind gently caresses the trees that border the beach’s end. It’s earlier on in the day, so the people watching is limited to a dog walker and an elderly couple… oh! And a familiar gentleman dressed in bermuda shorts and flip flops, and of course their signature shades! Yes, it’s none other than The Man With Two Brains himself, Johnny Hitmaker! He makes his way toward the camera, chuckling and smirking like his crew has already won it all.
“Ladies and gentlemen, what BETTER place to be, RIGHT here, RIGHT now, than EFATE ISLAND?!”
He strolls further down the beach and the camera of course follows.
“The incomparable beauty of this verdant paradise obfuscates the catastrophic horrors that await it later on tonight!”
He stops to look on at the crystal clear waters, hands on hips, basking in the fresh air and sunny skies. He takes in a deep breath, exhales, and keeps going.
“Hitmaker-Yamazaki Enterprises has not one, not two, not three, but FOUR of our clients representing the debut slash RETURN… of Monday Night Madness, and if you’re in the market for an iron-clad money-back guarantee, LOOK NO FURTHER… than my very OWN guarantee of a clean-sweep victory for ALL my clients!”
Johnny pauses to stroke his chin. His brow is furrowed in confusion.
“Well… all right, okay, at least ONE of our good folks under that fantastic Hitmaker-Yamazaki Enterprises umbrella-”
Johnny looks like what he’s about to say is killing him. He seethes for a bit before recollecting himself.
“...WILL lose tonight, but think of it this way: even when we LOSE we win; oh, sure, Themis Palaestra bringing home Gemini gold is a foregone conclusion, even if this particular match they’re in is merely for #1 contendership, but relisten to two words I already said: foregone conclusion! Beware of Greeks bearing biffs… and bops and ALL the onomatopoeia related to the complete and utter shit-kickings they’re going to unleash on the competition!”
Johnny whips off his shades in a dramatic fashion and points right at the camera.
“But in the maaaaaain event, YES, it’s for the IDL Championship, YES, it’s a tournament, YES, we have supervillain extraordinaire, the fearless, the super-POWERED Sierra Silver locking up with The Strong Style Satanist, ‘Deathwish’ Hide Yamazaki, but lemme make one thing… PERFECTLY CLEAR: one of them beats the other. That one goes on to win the whole damn thing. The loser gets an automatic SHOT at the IDL Championship, thusly ENSURING that we perPETUALLY keep ALL the gold under our banner! See? Win-win! And that’s just toooooooooo BAD for everyone else!”
He puts his shades back on and crosses his arms, as the scene comes to an end.
The scene opens up with a shot of Orlando Florida in the nighttime. As the scene rolls on, a voiceover of one Sierra Silver begins to play.
Sierra Silver: It is a dark and quiet night, The cliche is dark and stormy but storms can be scary and we don’t want to scare anyone, do we?? Anywhere, somewhere in this night there is a city. Within this city, there is a neighborhood, at least two if we’re being realistic. But only one that we need right now! And within this neighborhood, there is a house. And in this house, there is a dog that is really cute and loves pets! And down the street from this house with the cute dog is the home of The evilest evil to ever evil in the history of evil! The world’s sweetest supervillain…
The shot zooms in on the window of a house to reveal Sierra, wearing a pink and green cape, with an end in each hand, fanning it out wide behind her with a devious grin on her face. Behind her, an active volcano rages, lava bursting from the opening. The wind blows from a fan, blowing through her hair and cape
Sierra Silver: BEHOLD! And bow down to your evil overlord and new bestest friend! My name is Sierra HECKIN Silver! You may know me already, you may not. But you will if you don’t already! For I will be your IDL Champion once I win this tourney! Three victories stand between me and that pretty-pretty-shiny-shiny! These matches will not be easy to win, but Sierra is stronger than any mere mortal! And once I win I will establish my evil reign upon the whole wide world!!!!!
The volcanic background suddenly blinks and disappears, it is replaced by the bright green of a greenscreen. Sierra, however, doesn’t notice. So she continues with her monologue.
Sierra Silver: As your evil overlord, a whole new age of villainy will rise up. An age that will never be overthrown! My first order of business will be to give every member of the XdubF roster free cupcakes! Yeah, that’s pretty evil, right?? Not just any cupcakes, but MONSTER CUPCAKES! Whatever flavor you want, sugar-free if you want, gluten-free if you want, however you want, all packed with tasty flavors!!! I will be the bestest queen you ever did see! And I will do it all from my ultra-sneaky secret base, located right here in this here…
Sierra turns around to observe her volcanic background. Unaware of the malfunction, she continues as if everything is fine.
Sierra Silver: Wonderful, is it not??
Silver again turns to face the camera.
Sierra Silver: And so, to all of my new friends in this championship tournament, I hope you’re ready because soon you will all bow down to me as BESTIES!!! WOO! SI IS GONNA HUG YOU! SI IS GONNA HUG YOU!
She begins marching around the shot while chanting.
Sierra Silver: SI IS GONNA HUG YOU! SI IS GONNA HUG YOU! SI IS GONNA-
The scene slowly fades out while Sierra continues to chant…
VS.
The first few seconds of "The Mob Rules" by Black Sabbath begins to play, and once “Whoooooahh, come onnn!” is heard, Hide Yamazaki bursts through the curtains, swinging his chains and forcing out a sadistic-sounding laugh.
"Led to the ring by his manager, 'The #1 Hit-Maker' Johnny Bonecrusher... from the Kabukicho District in Shinjuku, Tokyo, Japan... weighing in at 253 pounds... 'Deathwish' Hide Yamazaki!"
Soon after, "The #1 Hit-Maker" Johnny Bonecrusher emerges as well, keeping a good distance away from the wild man. He slaps his hands together and clasps them together sinisterly as he basks in the chaotic energies of his client. The swinging of the chains continues as Yamazaki makes his way down the aisle. Johnny then speeds on past, ducking under the chain "propellers" and stopping once he's at the top of the ring steps. Yamazaki throws his chains into the ring with reckless abandon, inciting the referee to shout at him, which accomplishes nothing. Johnny just smirks and shrugs coyly at the referee. He pries the ropes apart, and Yamazaki darts in between them, entering the ring in a wild staggering way fashion. Johnny then casually descends the steps and begins circling the ring, before scurrying back up the ramp to walk his OTHER client down.
(Long live the reckless and the brave
I don't think I wanna be saved
My song has not been sung
So long live us)
As the music kicks in, Sierra bursts through the curtain with all the energy in the world and a huge smile on her face. Johnny Hitmaker comes out behind her, sweaty and breathing heavy from having to jog backstage. Sierra runs over to the edge of the stage pointing her Minecraft diamond sword prop out into the crowd before returning to the top of ramp and striking a "supervillain" pose. She poses for a few seconds before taking a running start down the ramp, high fiving everyone she can on the way down, going around the ring and back up the other side of the ramo before stopping herself at the top, turning, and skipping down and sliding into the ring under the bottom rope. Poor Johnny tries his best to keep up.
(Breaking out of a town called Suburbia
I remember everybody always saying
"Little brat must be crazy
Never make it in our vicious little world"
Still I'm leaving)
Sierra jumps up onto the turnbuckle and points her sword into the air, repeating the process for each corner before jumping down and running laps around the ring before coming to a stop with a hop in her corner, bouncing on her toes and heels as she awaits the beginning of the match. Johnny Hitmaker finds a chair and sits in it in a neutral corner, wheezing.
DING!
Hide and Sierra shake hands as Johnny Hitmaker looks on nervously from outside the ring. The two competitors start things off smoothly, going through some catch as catch can exchanges. Hide does his best to lean on his size and strength advantage while Silver keeps on her toes and stays quick, using leverage to her advantage as often as possible.
After a few trade offs don’t go anywhere, Sierra nearly catches Hide asleep at the wheel when she counters a back drop attempt into a sunset flip pinning combination - but Yamazaki is simply too strong for her to hold down for the three count. At ringside during this particular exchange, Johnny actually hides his face behind his necktie, then just claps loudly for both of them after the kickout.
Yamazaki takes control after a while and starts wearing Sierra down with rest holds, really leaning his weight onto her while applying chinlocks and trapezius pinches. He looks for a knockout blow when he sends Silver up in the air with a pop-up, but Silver manages to adjust in mid-air, dropping Yamazaki with a GREENHEART! She gets a two count before Hide grabs the bottom rope, and Johnny has to pull a paper bag out of his back pocket to stop himself from hyperventilating.
Eventually Hide shakes off the effects of the move and is back in control, working on Sierra Silver’s legs. He slows her down after a series of chop blocks and is in firm control, hitting the Wheel of Fortune and then the Tower. At one point, Silver is on the mat holding her leg in pain while Hitmaker shouts at his man to not INJURE her.
After some time, Silver pulls herself to a vertical base using the ropes to help her to her feet, clearly favoring her hurt leg. Yamazaki charges her and sends her flipping over the top rope with a lariat! AND THE BELL RINGS!!!
WINNER - SIERRA SILVER
(Match Time 11:15)
Hide and Johnny can’t believe it! Yamazaki is disqualified for intentionally sending Silver over the top rope!
Oh my goodness! Tula Keali’i’s zero tolerance policy includes disqualifications for intentionally sending your opponent over the top rope!
What a shocking way to bring an end to the very first match of the night, Jacuinde… If I were a betting man, and I am, I have a serious problem, I’d be putting some serious cash on Johnny Hitmaker having a LOT to say about this!
We meet up with Molly Barnes once again, but this time, the Salford Supernova isn’t quite as jolly as she was before. Not that she *was* before, she’s just even less jolly now. And the reason is that three hulking security guards are cuffing her while she tries pleading her innocence.
Molly:"I didn’t steal a bloody thing!"
But Marv isn’t going to let up. As he directs the security guards, he wags his finger at her.
Marv: “Tsk, tsk, tsk, you said it yourself, Molly! You stole those t-shirts and are now selling them for profit! That’s theft from the Xtreme Wrestling Federation.”
Molly:"Wanker!"
Marv: “Take her away, guys!”
Molly:"What? You’re having a laugh aren’t you? I’m scheduled to be in the tournament next!"
Just as the security guards started to drag her off, Vinnie Lane came jogging up, and he held up his hands.
[font color=#FF1493]Vinnie: “Stop, dudes!”[/font]
Marv crossed his arms.
Marv: “Mister Lane, glad you made it! I’m afraid one of your new employees has been caught with her hand in the cookie jar.
Vinnie: “What’s this about?”
Molly:"You told me I was gonna get money for all those t-shirts, but I haven’t seen a single penny!"
Vinnie: “Molly, I tried to explain, the money’s…”
Molly:"Yeah yeah, the money’s in the pot. Tell that to me nan. Me boiler’s broken down, me roof’s leaking, and the faucets barely work half the time. But not to worry, I’ll get a bit of cash in half a year, innit?"
The sarcasm was easily detected, but Vinnie raised an eyebrow.
Vinnie: “What about the signing bonus you got? It was rather generous, dude. Rox said I was crazy to even give you one.”
Molly:"Spent it all."
Vinnie: “On?”
Molly:"Crisps. Look, are these cheeky sods going to let me go, or what?"
Vinnie sighed, and motioned for the guards to unhand her. Molly pulled her arms from them and massaged her wrist.
Molly:"Bloody rude, innit?"
Now it was Vinnie who crossed his arms.
Vinnie: “I’m gonna let you go with a warning this time, dude. No more stealing, Molly! And you better put up a good show tonight! The winner’s purse should be plenty to get your roof fixed, I’d say. So if you want to fix your problems, go out there and get it done. Elijah Copeland is going to do the same.”
Molly sighed.
Molly:"I’m sorry… I just didn’t know what else to do."
Molly quickly walked off before Vinnie could change his mind. Marv leaned into him.
Marv: “You’re being too lenient, sir.”
Vinnie: “We’ll see, Marv. We’ll see.”
VS.
Li’l Juicy pops out from the back with a bunch of energy, clapping his hands to the beat of his entrance theme. He heads down to the ring and starts taking off all of his excess gear, like his puffy jacket and massive amounts of gold jewelry.
Finally, he takes off his shades and places them on the ring post behind his corner before leaning back against the ropes and waiting for his opponent.
“The VIP” Chris Mosh walks out slowly with a smirk on his face. Halfway down to the ring he finds a fan with a Li’l Juicy poster and grabs it from him, then pulls out a marker and autographs it himself before handing it back.
Mosh makes his way to the ring, pointing at Juicy and laughing as he moves. He then climbs into the ring and goes to his corner, waiting for the match to get started.
DING!
Li’l Juicy gives the crowd a good show, dancing around and basically just doing his best to get the fans involved. His height gives him the ability to stay at an arm’s length from Chris Mosh, who grows more and more visibly frustrated with his inability to keep Juicy locked up in any sort of entanglement. Finally, though, Mosh manages to drop Juicy to the mat by tackling his knees from behind while Juicy keeps showboating for the crowd. Mosh then pops up and taunts the crowd himself, making fun of Juicy’s dance moves as the boos rain in.
After staying in control using his technical prowess, Mosh starts feeling a little cockier and messes with the bigger Juicy, shoving him by the head and teasing his inability to counter effectively. Juicy gets clearly frustrated by this and finds an opening when Mosh is busy jawing at the crowd while holding onto a side headlock - Juicy hits a rough looking back suplex! Mosh winces on the mat and Juicy looks around like he didn’t quite mean to make him land that way.
Juicy stays on the attack, though, and keeps plonking Mosh with some hard shots. Mosh’s face swells up a bit and he gets more and more visibly annoyed by Juicy, even though the spuds he’s eating aren’t exactly devastating, they’re more than enough to keep Mosh off his game plan and prevent him from pulling Juicy back down to the mat. Mosh finally wades through a barrage of big fists just to hit a collar and elbow tie up… ESSKEETIT! Juicy hits the snap DDT out of nowhere and floats over Mosh for a pin, but Mosh rolls a shoulder off the mat at two and a half!
Mosh, clearly pissed off after nearly getting pinned, tackles Juicy as soon as he’s up and refuses to let him back to his feet. He hits him with a few different suplex varieties to get him dazed, and then scoops him into a Moshpit! Juicy’s size works against him as his weight just drives him harder into the mat! Mosh hooks a leg and gets the 1-2-3!
WINNER - CHRIS MOSH
(Match Time 7:22)
Chris Mosh giving us a good explanation of why he calls himself the VIP! He’s on his way to the semifinals to take on Lexi Gold!
Lexi’s got the advantage of having a first round bye, for whatever reason, but I like this Chris Mosh, Jacuinde, I think he’s got a good shot of going all the way!
The scene came up backstage and there was a closed door. The camera pans around and we see Elijah Copeland walking down the hallway and heading towards the door. He’s wearing a black leather jacket, loose fitting jeans, black sneakers, a duffle bag on his shoulder, and black tinted shades on his face. He leans down and grabs something from his duffle bag. He grabs a name plate and puts it on the door. The name plate says, “United Elite”. He put the duffle bag back on his shoulder and entered the room. There, he saw both Kai and Peter waiting for him. He put his bag down on the floor and took off his shades.
Elijah Copeland: “I hope you boys are ready for tonight? What am I saying? Of course you guys are. You boys trained your asses off and it really shows. I know you guys are going to win, but make sure you guys humiliate …ummm…what are they called? Big Bong boyz? I have no idea, honestly. But honestly, nobody cares about those posers.”
Kai Morgan: “Far as I’m concerned I’m looking past those incompetent douche canoes! As far as I’m concerned, I’m only looking at our ACTUAL competition. BTGL? Those Greek motherfuckers? And umm…shit…who else? Jesus Christ I’ve been losing track of all the goddamn teams they have around here. I mean shit, they all really just sound the same. “We’re the best tag team because A-B-C! We’re gonna beat you guys in the gauntlet because X-Y-Z!” Fuck outta here! All three of us have heard that garbage before, and from people less likely to get an amateur root canal with the tip of our kneecaps!”
Elijah Copeland: “They talk all the shit about us and they proven themselves to be nothing more than a couple of jokes. Shit, I’ve been talking with Jason Cashe about getting a piece of them. I know he wants to get his hands on them as well.”
Oliver Peters: “Look. While The Bean Bag Twins have been talking all this talk, we gotta give credit to one of the teams in this, just one, those Two Broke Chicks or whatever they’re called-”
Kai interrupts, an epiphany seemingly coming to his head.
Kai Morgan: “2 BROKE CHICKS!! THAT WAS THE NAME!! NOW I REMEMBER!!”
Olly gives Kai a confused look as he continues.
Oliver Peters: “...because they have accomplishments to back up their claims. While we might be the most gifted in the ring when it comes to doin’ the grapps, they’ve been teaming up for over a year, if I’m not mistaken, so we can’t take that lightly. Now I know that you’re gonna run through that one night tourney, Elijah, because look at your competition. For fucksake there’s a guy there who calls himself ‘Lil Juicy’, I don’t think you got much to worry about there.”
Elijah Copeland: “I’m not worried one bit, but I do see a lot of great competition in that tourney. I can guarantee that I’m going to get hurt, but if it gets me to be the IDL Champion, then it’s worth it. If I know anything, I know the people I want to face tonight are Lexi Gold and Chris North? Is that his name?”
He goes on his phone and looks at twitter to see what his name is.
Elijah Copeland: “CHRIS MOSH! That’s his name. Chris Mosh and Lexi Gold, to me, seem like the toughest people to go up against.”
He looks up at both Oliver and Kai.
Elijah Copeland: “Tonight, I believe we all will be wearing gold. Why? Because we’re the most gifted superstars that ever stepped foot in this company. Tonight, United Elite makes their mark in the XWF.”
He looks at them and puts his fist in the middle as a symbol of unity. Will the two put their fist next to his as a sign? Olly looks over at Kai, then at the fist in the middle, before joining Elijah, putting his fist next to his. Now they just await Kai, who looks down at the two fists, before empathically laying his right next to the others.
Kai Morgan: “Tonight, we show this motherfuckers who the fuck we are.”
Elijah smiles, grabbing Olly and Kai by the head for a group hug before we fade out.
VS.
The camera pans around the sanatorium battle zone. Just then there was black, gold, and white flickering as "Breaking Through" by the Wreckage hits the speakers in the arena.
♪ Sever every tie
Untangle every lie
Your words don't mean anything anymore, no
Never satisfied ♪
Just then Elijah is seen coming through the Curtains and the fans begins to boo. He is seen wearing a black muscle shirt with "The Copeland Era" written on the front, black and gold trunks with Copeland written on the back in gold, black knee pads, black and gold boots, white wrapped up hand on his left hand, black wrist tape on his left, black dog tag with "Elijah Copeland" written in it, and a black sweatband up his arms with "Copeland" written in gold. He put his wrist together and gets a huge smirk on his face. He looks around and nodes.
♪ But I won't compromise myself for you
Anymore anymore, no
You're so complicated
I'm so over it ♪
He starts walking down the ramp as the fans continue to shower boos. He stops and looks at the crowd and gives off a slight smirk and laughs at their misfortunes. He bad mouth the fans before getting down to the ringside and stopping on the ringside mat. He walks towards the steel steps and breathes in.
♪ Don't tell me everything is all right
(I know you know)
Don't tell me how to live my life
I'm breaking through tonight ♪
He slaps the steps a few times before walking up them. He walks alongside the edge of the ring. He enters it and walks towards the turnbuckle.
♪ You can crash and burn this time
As I leave it all behind
These scars won't breathe anymore anymore, no
Sounds like goodbye ♪
He looks at the fans as he slowly takes off his shirt and throws it to the outside. He points at the fans before getting down and moves to the corner. He then waits for his opponent.
The crowd cheers as Molly Barnes, the Supernova of Salford, emerges from behind the entrance curtain with a grin on her face.
She jogs to the ring and does a few stretches at ringside before prancing up the steps with pep, banging on the top turnbuckle and then holding her index fingers high in the air, pointing straight into the sky. She gives a quick bit of a headbang before ducking into the ring and standing in her corner, shadowboxing.
DING!
Barnes heads to the center of the ring looking for a hand shake, and Copeland meets her there with a smile. He extends his hand, but then grabs Molly’s wrist and yanks her into a short-arm clothesline, flattening Miss Machinery and undoubtedly leaving her with stars circling her head. Copeland bobs his head cockily and reaches down Barnes, and she traps him in a small package for two! Copeland kicks out angrily and leaps to his feet, putting the boots to Molly until she turtles up.
With Molly on the mat in a corner, Elijah Copeland climbs to the second rope and slaps his elbow before falling down towards Barnes with the point of his elbow… but Molly rolls away! She leaps onto Elijah with a three quarter Nelson, but he’s out before even a one count. Molly then jumps over him with a sunset flip, getting a one but not a two before Copeland kicks out again. Copeland misses a lariat, and Barnes gets behind him and locks in an abdominal stretch! She slaps his stretched out ribs for added burn, but soon Copeland just out-muscles her and flips her to her back with a hip toss, then kicks her right in the middle of her spine!
Copeland grabs a handful of Molly’s hair and pulls her to her feet, then sets her up for a Side Russian Leg Sweep, positioning her head near the turnbuckles. Molly reverses it into a whizzer! She gets a strong two count before Copeland kicks out right before the three, and now he is LIVID with Molly continually taking him down with basic amateur wrestling moves. He gets to his feet and flattens her with a jumping knee strike right to the point of the jaw. Copeland yanks his knee pad down as he walks in a semicircle, taunting the crowd… then he runs at Molly as she sits up, drilling her in the face with a nasty shining wizard that has her out on her back!
Copeland jawjacks the crowd some more as he lifts Molly up and hooks her, then lifts, twists, and drops her hard to the canvas with the Money Maker! He sits up next to the prone Molly Barnes and laughs at her, shoving her head with his hand and doing an impression of her face flattened against the mat. Copeland then stands and struts around the ring, posing and pointing back at the heap Barnes is in, as she still hasn’t moved a muscle after the devastating finishing maneuver.
Finally, Elijah Copeland pulls a limp Molly Barnes up and swings an arm over her neck. He lifts her in a vertical suplex and holds her up, flexing his free arm. Molly wobbles and turns her body, managing to get herself seated on the back of Copeland’s neck! She has her thighs squeezing his head from behind, and Copeland seems lost at what to do… he walks in a circle looking for a way to get her off of him, and she leans forward, trapping him in a victory roll! Copeland’s shoulders are on the mat for a 1-2-3! He kicks out right after the count and looks incensed… Molly Barnes looks to be in disbelief herself!
WINNER - MOLLY BARNES
(Match Time 8:32)
After the match is over, Copeland attacks Molly and starts pummeling her with fists, feet, and knees. Molly can’t do much other than to just cover up in a corner… and then Sierra Silver comes running from the back to make the save!
Sierra, still limping a bit from her match with Yamazaki, dives into the ring but Copeland sees her coming and is read… he picks her up and grabs her hurt leg, dropping her shin across his knee! He does it a second time, and a third, and then tosses Silver over his shoulders with a hard hitting Saito suplex, leaving her in a pile holding her leg right next to Molly Barnes.
Copeland leaves the ring in a huff, shouting some choice words at the fans before leaving the area, and officials check on Molly and Sierra in the ring, with the two women nodding thanks to each other.
Absolute mayhem after the match but WOW what a shock ending! Elijah Copeland had to be the favorite to take it all going into this match.
One HUNDRED percent, Jacuinde… even Molly Barnes doesn’t know how Molly Barnes won that match. We need to call Vinnie Lane and have this result overturned, this isn’t what was supposed to happen!
Well, happen it did, Bath, and that means the semis are set… we’ll see Mosh versus Lexi, and we’ll also see Sierra Silver against the woman she just rescued… Molly Barnes!
That explains it, Jacuinde! Sierra is a super VILLAIN… she only stopped Copeland from hurting Molly more than he did so that SHE could do the damage herself later! Brilliant!
I don’t know about all that, Bath..
Backstage, Claire and Ximena were warming up for their match. Ximena was doing some squats, while Claire was punching a picture of Kenzi Grey on the wall.
Claire: "Maan, I gotta tell you Ximmie, tonight’s gonna be our fucking night! Four stupid fucking teams of a bunch of turds are all that stands between us and a title shot."
Ximena stopped her squats to make sure she didn’t overdo it. She looked over at Claire and shook her head.
Ximena: "I really wish you wouldn’t talk about our opponents like that. If they’re just a bunch of turds, and we end up losing tonight, what does that make us?"
Claire: "It makes up not a bunch of turds, Ximmie. It doesn’t have anything to do with that. They’re turds whether they win or lose, and we aren’t. Get it?"
XImmie rolled her eyes.
Ximena: "You really enjoy making friends everywhere you go, don’t you?"
Claire: "If they’re cool, sure. If not, they can go get fucked. Only two people in this match I like are the Bing Bong Twinzz and that’s just because they’re an annoying bunch of trolls without any kind of self-awareness."
Ximena: "Yes, they do seem to be your type…"
Claire stopped punching Roxy’s picture and pulled up her nose.
Claire: "The fuck you on my case for, XImmie? You want me to stand here and declare my love and respect for those dumbass Themis Thots who are as interchangeable as Coke and Pepsi? Motherfuckin’ fuck that. Johnny Hitmaker’s their manager, that should tell you all you need to know."
Ximena: "It tells me they have people who believe in them and support them. With your attitude, we’re going to run out of allies very quickly."
Claire shrugged.
Claire: "Bitch, the two of us… That’s all we will ever need. Tonight, we take our first steps towards becoming Gemini Champs. And fuck all those who think they can stop us. Now let’s get ready, ya bish."
Claire flexed her shoulders and walked off towards the ring entrance.
[mad]
TO DETERMINE ONE OF TWO CONTENDERS FOR THE GEMINI TITLES...
A 5-TEAM GAUNTLET MATCH!
THE BING BONG TWINZZ
BGTL
2 BROKE CHICKS
TEAM KTFO
THEMIS PALAESTRA[/mad]
We are all set for the Gemini Gauntlet… five teams hitting the ring one at a time at random, eliminated one by one until there’s only one left… and that remaining team gets a shot at the Madness Gemini Titles! Let’s see who’s starting us off…
Da Bing Bong Twinzz bust out that back stage bitch like WTF and perp slash pimp walk to the RANG. You feel me?
The crowd unanimously boos the Twinzz as they head to the ring, middle fingers high.
In unison with the music the arena goes to a dark blue haze and strobes in time with the beat. Smoke fills the stage and lifting from beneath, Desdemona and Agrippina slowly appear with their backs turned. They both pause momentarily before turning and making their way to the ring all business.
DING!
At the start of the match, the two teams are fairly even. The Themises use their athleticism and grace to counter the street style brawling tactics of the Twinzz, but the Bing Bong Boys do manage to take over after a few back and forths between the teams.
With MC C-Munqqquee and Li’l Ca$h-App Dolla Billyunnai$$e tagging frequently in order to keep control over Desdemona, they effectively cut the ring in half long enough to get Des set up in a corner, with MC C-Munq lifting her for a top rope powerbomb - Li’l Ca$h-App from another corner is ready to complete the Cancel Culture double team move, but Desdemona flips her hips and flings C-Munqqquee in a hurricanrana instead of eating the powerbomb. Ca$h-App tries to avoid hitting his partner with the big flying leg drop but can’t prevent all of the impact.
Desdemona hits the hot tag on Agrippina and then clears Li’l Ca$h-App out of the ring. Agrippina hooks C-Munqqquee up into a vertebreaker, and Desdemona joins her, linking arms. They then drive C-Munqqquee down hard with a Love & Hate Driver for the 1-2-3!
WINNERS - THEMIS PALAESTRA
(Match Time 7:36)
Well, I think we’re going to see a LOT of jokes on Twitter tomorrow!
Better luck next time, boys! BING BONG!
Ikura ikura ikura ore no kachi wa ikura!
Run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up!
Ikura ikura ikura ore no kachi wa ikura!
Run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up, run it up!
ANARCHY's "Run It Up" comes on over the PA system as the arena lights dim down, bringing all attention to the lighting on and around the stage. Everyone’s attention is on the entrance curtain when, all of a sudden, an air horn like the one heard from a fire engine BLASTS through the arena. From the side of the stage, a tricked out RV painted white with neon blue accents rolls up. As the opening refrain with Skits Vicious begins, theside door flies open and out comes the 2 Broke Chicks. In name only, of course! There’s some visible laughs of amusement as Jane then turns towards the stage and tries to look serious as she approaches the ramp. On the opposite side of the mood spectrum, Chiaki Sanada gives their ride an adoring pat before scurrying to catch up with her tag team partner.
As the two make their way down the ramp, Jane’s attempt to stay serious is all but lost once Chiaki moves in front of her, just goofing off and throwing random signs at the camera in sync with their music. As the chorus plays, Chiaki starts singing along. The strength of the duo finally breaks into laughter at the little one’s antics and the pair continue towards the ring. Once they reach ringside, Jane comes in behind Chiaki and lifts the crazy little Joshi up onto her shoulders. She makes a lap around the ring itself while Chiaki’s waving her arms from side to side over her head, trying to get the fans to join in. They do, for the most part. Chiaki hops off of Jane’s shoulders and onto the apron. She’s back to throwing thuggish little hand signals as Jane climbs onto the apron. Jane climbs into the ring and stands behind Chiaki who is still doing her thing as they both throw up their actual, personal team gesture. Chiaki finally gets into the ring and the two of them move to their corner, removing their entrance gear and getting in a bit of last minute extra stretching as they get ready for their match.
DING!
Jane Harper starts for team 2BC, and Agrippina for Themis Palaestra. The two women are evenly matched to start, but Harper’s strength gives her an advantage after not too long. Several nearfalls take place, but Themis is able to kick out each time. After Agrippina counters a spinning back fist by ducking under and hitting a desperation inverted atomic drop, she is able to tag out to Desdemona, who seems to have fully recovered from the prior match.
Harper tags in Chi Chi at this point, and at first the smol style superstar keeps Desdemona on her heels with her quickness and unorthodox behavior - but eventually she is caught and ground down with pressure holds and limb work. Des and Agrippina tag in and out repeatedly, much like what the Bing Bong Twinzz did to them in the first match, and Chi Chi is in a lot of trouble.
Desdemona is able to lock Chi Chi in a nasty looking submission, a camel clutch/hammerlock combo. Chi Chi is in obvious discomfort but simply wails in pain and kicks her feet, refusing to give up. The hold is in for a good long while before Desdemona appears to wear herself out from applying the pressure and lets go.
Des then tags in Agrippina once more, but it gives Chi Chi Sanada enough time to recover sufficiently to hit Agrippina with a Chi Chi Bang Bang cutter! Chi Chi then is able to tag out to Jane, and Harper wastes no time listing Themis into a Death Valley Driver - Cha Ching! Jane makes a cover and Chi Chi cuts off an attempt at interference by Desdemona, allowing a 1-2-3!
WINNERS - 2BROKECHICKS
(Match Time 12:44)
Great debut by these 2 Broke Chicks! Something tells me they’ll be making money soon enough!
I’m calling it, Jacuinde… 2 Broke Chicks is winning this WHOLE thing!
Claire Rogers and Ximena Asensio walk out onto the stage, flexing and posing for the fans. Claire laughs and waves at Jacuinde, who buries his face in his arms trying to hide from her. Together, the BGTL ladies march to the ring in unison, then both break into a run halfway down the ramp and slide into the ring in tandem!
Claire and Xim exchange high tens and then prepare for the match to begin.
DING!
Claire starters for her team with Ximena on the apron cheering her on. This time around, 2BC elects to have Chi Chi start. Unfortunately, this results in Chi Chi quickly being tossed around and bounced from pillar to post by Claire Rogers, who seems more interested in seeing how far she can throw the diminutive opponent than anything else. Claire tags out to Xim, who continues dominating Sanada for a little bit as well before Claire practically begs her to tag her back in.
Claire pummels Chi Chi for several minutes as Jane tries to cheer her partner on. Rogers continuously laughs and mocks the smaller girl, flexing her scantily clad but iron-muscled rear end right in Sanada’s face - much to Ximena Asensio’s dismay, as she scolds her own partner to take things more seriously.
The distraction ends up being enough for Chi Chi to come to her senses enough to leap onto Claire’s back and start beating her senseless with fists to the temples and face. Claire runs around the ring trying to free herself but Chi Chi is like a freaking possum clinging to a tree, she is not getting shook loose! Claire eventually tries to just run backward as fast as she can into a corner, but Chi Chi hops off and lands harmlessly on the top as Rogers hits the buckles back first and flops to the mat… letting Chi Chi land a moonsault kneedrop from the top! Sanada tags out to Jane Harper then, and Harper proceeds to take control.
Harper simply refuses to let Claire get any sort of steam behind her, and when Ximena tries to help motivate her partner, Jane Harper sends Claire whipping into the ropes, where she butts heads with Asensio and sends her flying off the apron into the guard railing. This leads directly to Jane flipping a dazed Claire into a Tombstone… and Chi Chi springboards from the apron to grab Claire’s feet for added impact! GAS MONEY!!! Chi Chi hops up and down as Jane hooks a leg for the 1-2-3!
WINNERS - 2BROKECHICKS
(Match Time 9:44)
Whew! I have to admit, I’m a little relieved that there won’t be any more of Claire Rogers here tonight!
Did you guys hook up, J? Oh man, you are the MAN! But I told you… it’s 2 Broke Chicks for the W!
Fifth Team: Team KTFO
The exhausted pair of Chi Chi Sanada and Jane Harper watch as Oliver Peters and Kai Morgan, collectively known as Team KTFO, emerge from the back with slick grins on their faces and start to slowly walk to the ring.
The music gets them good and pumped and by the time they are at ringside they are practically bursting with energy. Peters hops onto the apron while Morgan climbs up in one corner and holds his arms high, soaking up the attention from the Vanuatu crowd.
DING!
The bell sounds and the last leg of the Gemini Gauntlet is a go…
Morgan, The Bastard King, starts for his team and squares up with Jane Harper to start things off. Harper looks good at first but she can’t quite hang with Morgan’s mat technique and finds herself flat on her belly after a few minutes while Kai Morgan poses on her back, showboating for the crowd. Jane manages to find something down deep to get herself up to her knees, but Morgan grabs her in a bow and arrow submission… and then slams a V-Trigger Knee into the back of her head for a two count! Morgan smiles knowing he almost had it with the First Born Son, then tags in his partner.
Peters takes over where Morgan left off, working Jane Harper into the mat with grueling techniques designed to simply pressure the will out of someone. Jane manages to grab hold of his leg, however, and flips the script on him by applying a half crab that has him in serious agony. Harper seems to run out of gas pretty quickly though, this being her third match of the night, and she lets loose of the hold so she can tag her partner in. Peters gets to his feet but he’s limping, and Chi Chi keeps him on his heels with her incredible speed.
Chi Chi smashes Peters in the knee with a nasty superkick, and when he collapse she meets him with a running knee strike right to the skull! Peters flops to his back and Chi Chi is on him for 1-2-BROKEN UP by Kai Morgan! And Morgan doesn’t just break up the pin, he also grabs Chi Chi’s arms and lifts her up into a facebuster! The Second Sonnet!Jane Harper rushes the ring to go after him, but the referee cuts her off trying to maintain order. Unfortunately this allows some double teaming to happen behind the ref’s back, and Chi Chi is soon caught by both members of Team KTFO… an ax kick from Peters right into a discus clothesline from Morgan, and then a curb stomp from Peters for good measure! The ASF- Absolutely Stay Fucked!
By the time the official has Harper back on the apron, Peters has left the ring and only Chi Chi and Morgan remain. Chi Chi flat on her face in a puddle of spit and Morgan behind her, locking in a Rings of Saturn submission!
With Sanada already unconscious from the double team assault, the ref only takes one look at her and the way she isn’t defending herself or fighting back in any way, and he calls for the bell! This match is over!
WINNERS AND QUALIFIED FOR A GEMINI TITLE SHOT - TEAM KTFO
(Match Time 14:55)
And there you have it folks! Team KTFO is walking out of Vanuatu as the first tag team to qualify for the Madness Gemini Title match! Bath, it looks like your prediction didn’t quite pull through…
One on one I’ll pick the Chicks any day, but gauntlet matches are brutal tests of endurance… Chi Chi and Jane just didn’t have anything left in the tank!
Well speaking of endurance, we’re about to see the IDL Championship semifinals, Bath, this will be the second match for everyone involved… except of course for Lexi Gold!
Someday I hope we all learn the deep dark secret Lexi knows about Vinnie Lane… why else would he have gift wrapped this tournament for her!
Good question…
We cut to some footage shown earlier on where a camera is seen outside the Holiday Inn Resort Vanuatu where Lexi Gold and Elijah Martin are staying for the night. The camera pans to them arriving there holding hands as they walk together near the entrance. Lexi is looking stunningly beautiful as always wearing a metallic gold bodycon dress and matching heels whereas Elijah had on a black tank top, jean shorts and black crocs. The couple looked happy judging by the expression on their faces.
Before they could make their way inside the hotel, Lexi spots some die hard fans of hers coming and asking for autographs. They stop and she gladly fulfills their requests while mingling with them. Elijah patiently stands there for a few autographs, but as she is about to pose for a fan’s selfie, he steps in closer.
EM: “Okay love, that’s enough for them.”
The fans look on and boo him as she is taken away from them.
Lexi Gold: “You're right. I got to put all my focus into this championship tournament. This is huge for me and I don't want to mess things up.”
Lexi smiles and feels confident enough heading into it as she looks at Elijah.
EM: “Let’s get moving, gotta start changing and preparing for the long night ahead.”
She nods her head and her eyes gaze at the newly won Anarchy Championship that is sitting nicely on his shoulder, helping him to adjust it so it doesn't fall off.
Lexi Gold: “The title really looks good on you. You were meant to be a champion, babe. It has been a long time coming and can't wait to see what you will do with it.”
EM: “This championship almost looks as beautiful as you, and we will only have that many more people jealous of our relationship if you go out there tonight and become the first winner of the IDOL Championship! But hun… I need to know your mindset about your potential workload tonight.”
Lexi Gold: “I don't know if jealous would be the correct word. More like admirable, but as far as my mindset goes…. I'm ready. Been ready. They could throw me in the ring with the entire Madness roster and I'll bring my absolute best. Lexi Gold doesn't back out from any fights.”
EM: “Very good, but just remember as you begin this new chapter in your career: you are here to win gold and make money… you’re not here to make friends and play nice.”
Elijah walks ahead of her and that leaves Lexi watching him and pondering that thought before expressing a negative facial reaction towards what he said as the scene fades.
Everything was set up nicely for the debut of MADNESS! You had to say it with excitement or in this case, all caps. That was how nice it was backstage. Production staff was on top of their game tonight as new faces from different places came together to showcase a little MADNESS. Later in the show, people were still hype as the moving parts backstage were as active as when the show first kicked off.
Chaz Bobo: "There! They took over the locker room.."
The XWF Referee seemed frustrated as he pointed towards a door on the right side of the hallway. Jason Cashe appears next to him and he has a slight nod to him as he bites down on his bottom lip.
Cashe: "Alright, bet. I'ma need you to knock on the door for me.."
Chaz Bobo: "What? I am an Official and they are reckless!"
A hand on Chaz's shoulder, Cashe gives him comfort.
Cashe: "I got you. I'ma be right there with you. I just want them to see you before they see me.. Trust me, I got this."
Patting the Referee"s shoulder, Cashe reaffirms his well-being.
Cashe: "You'll be aight, let's go.."
Almost having to push Chaz, the two of them approach the door. It was closed as loud music was vibrating the door. It was no doubt some lame dick rappers who mumble more than spit anything worth hearing. Cashe loved hiphop but most of what catches radio airwaves is NOT hiphop. His eyes glancing around to see who might be approaching, Cashe was always observate of his surroundings. At the door, Cashe nudges Chaz.
Cashe: "Aight.. Knock.."
Chaz softly tapped his knuckles against the door. Cashe's expression went droopy as he stared at Chaz.
Cashe: "You better put some force behind that knock Bruh! The hell was that?"
Chaz Bobo: "That was a grown man knock!"
Cashe: "You're acting REAL scared right now! I said I got you… Here, let me show you how to let them hear it."
Turning his back to the door, Jason Cashe mule kicks back against the door. Once, twice and for a third time he added to the kick. Even with the music as loud as it was, they'd have to be deaf to hear the kick knocking. The music lowers and Cashe slides out of view. As the door opens, it was one of Da Bing Bong Twinzz. You couldn't tell them apart because both had stupid hair and spunk targets tattooed in the middle of their foreheads.
Bing Bong Twin 1: "Hold up! You ain't one of the hoes? Who is you?!"
Chaz Bobo: I-I'm.."
A simple distraction. Everyone knows that that kind of knocking usually has the real ones suspecting the Police. These dudes were expecting groupies. Ones paid for no doubt. Cashe pops out and POWER SLAPS the Bing Bong Twin downwards! He lets out a sigh cry as he falls into the doorway. Shoving him back into the locker room, Cashe enters with him and the door shuts behind them. Leaving Chaz in the hallway by himself with the camera. He shrugs at the recording as grumblings and fighting is heard inside the locker room. Chaz leans closer to try and get a better idea of what was going on. The door rips open!
Chaz Bobo: "Aaaghhh!"
His reaction of sound was matched with the Bing Bong Twin as he scrambled out of the locker room. Jason Cashe comes out after him, kicking his back right leg behind the left which causes the Twin to stumble and slap into the hallway floor.
Cashe: "Nah homie, Jacksonville is the other way! Where you going?"
The twin on the floor, Cashe was still unsure if it was MC C-Munqqquee or Li'l Ca$h-App. Either way, he hated their names, faces and mouths as they ran them on social media.
Cashe: "What was that shit you was tweeting again? Huh? I told you I'd see you soon.. Say it now!"
To the Twins' credit, he pops up, shooting off the ground at Cashe like he was truly as ride or die as he claimed to be. There was a need to pass that credit but it wouldn't be now. Cashe was ready for the attempt even if it did surprise him. He just moved out of the way and kicked the Twin to the midsection, flipping him over onto his back.
Reaching down, Jason goes to grab the shoes on Da Bing Bong Twinzz feet. He tugs away, trying to keep Cashe from taking the shoes that they claimed were expensive on twitter. Cashe gets one off and slaps the Twin with the sole of it before taking off the other.
Cashe: "These are mine now.. About the only thing REAL about either of you bitches!"
Walking OVER the Twin, Jason Cashe joined Chaz Bobo who was looking inside the locker room. It was trashed and the other Bing Bong Twin was slumped against the far wall.
Cashe: "Say.. What size shoe do you wear? Want some kicks?"
Chaz begins to hurry away from the scene. Cashe laughs as he ties the laces together and hangs the sneakers over his shoulder. They leave the scene. Cashe never looks back.. There was no concern over the new Madness Tag Team.
Outside we get a good view of the condemned building that will host the match between Jacki O'Lantern and names like Thrax and Darren Dangerous. After we get a good 360 view of the rundown building, the humming of The Addams Family theme song is heard coming from the distance. Frightfully Delightful herself, Jacki O'Lantern walks into view dressed in her ring gear with her green hair tied back into a ponytail. The pumpkin-faced, fan favorite smiles at the camera and stops to examine the building before turning to face the camera and acknowledge the viewers.
“Hello XWF faithfuls. Jacki O'Lantern here and I am so excited to be part of a great company such as XWF. So much history has been poured into this very company for many, many years and I'm truly honoured that I finally get to compete here among the many greats. With that being said my first match is a last man standing match to claim the title of being known as XWF Madness Lord of Violence.”
She runs a hand through her colored hair and leans back against the building, looking around and taking in the environment she is in. Suddenly the camera pans to a group of black cats walking near her. She takes notice of them and smiles as they start playing in the weeds right in front of her, then she crouches down and one comes running up to her and she starts scratching the top of her black feline friend.
“Midnight, how would you feel about me being known as the Madness Lord of Violence? Also, how do you feel about me entering this match?”
The cat meows and head-bunts her in approval, then takes off to play again.
“Don't get into any trouble now. Anyway, back to you guys, the cool fans watching this! I'm being challenged with a tough task at hand, but rest assured I'm very familiar with these types of matches. I said I would welcome any challenge that comes my way and I meant every word. My request was surely not disappointed, but rather fulfilled. I'm excited to see what my opponents will bring to this match. Surely there will be plenty of violence, and possibly bloodshed spilled, so if my army of fans is sensitive to all three, cover your eyes and ears and just know I'll be okay in the end.”
“I'm walking into this with an open mind, with respect, and my determination to do well and possibly win the entire thing. I know these lines may come off cheesy, or uninteresting to some, but that's the mindset right now. I plan to showcase it during this Last Man Standing match. They call me the Queen of Trickery, but soon I will adopt a new nickname and carry it with me like a badge of honor.”
Jacki winks at the camera before walking off and exploring the area more. Her cats take notice of her leaving and follow behind.
Time for the first semifinal… and our first look at Lexi Gold in the ring!
I already told you, J, it’s one and done! Chris Mosh is gonna be the IDL Champion !
VS.
Once again, Chris Mosh emerges in front of the Vanuatu crowd. He makes his way to the ring, grinning from ear to ear and handing out signed photos of him pinning Li’l Juicy earlier in the night. How did he find so many copies so quickly on an island in the South Pacific? Connections.
Mosh gets to the ring and moves to his corner, then just rolls his eyes and yawns while he waits for his opponent to arrive.
“5 out of 6” by Dessa plays and Lexi Gold appears from behind the curtain to a chorus of cheers from the crowd. She slowly makes her way down the ramp and gazes out on the jam packed arena before she runs forward to fans at ringside and claps their hands. The Golden Goddess then makes her way up the steps and goes through the bottom rope and poses a bit before she makes her way toward the center for another pose. She then backs into her corner and stares the referee down
DING!
Mosh and Gold meet in the middle of the ring to start things off, and they lock up… but Gold quickly goes low and catches Mosh in a drop toe hold, using his own leverage against him and sending him crashing to the mat. Lexi right away tries to trap Mosh in an arm triangle, but he frantically scrambles out of her grip and gets back to his feet - but Lexi is up quick too and leps up and catches him in a flying headscissor, flipping him headfirst into the bottom turnbuckle!
Mosh is reeling after the Fool’s Gold maneuver, and Lexi stays on him when he pulls himself back up, resting his butt on the second buckle. She comes in and plants a foot on his face, grabs the top rope on either side with both hands and leaning into him hard. The ref breaks it up and Gold follows the instructions of the official immediately, backing off and letting Mosh come out of the corner. Mosh locks up with her again and this time doesn’t waste any time in slapping a firm side headlock onto Lexi. Mosh grinds down on the hold and then switches seamlessly to a front face lock, and then transitions again into a swinging neckbreaker!
Lexi is up slowly, and she’s down again right away after Mosh drills her with a precision superkick! Mosh drops on top of Gold and hooks a leg, but he’s STUNNED when Lexi gets a shoulder up at the count of two! He argues the count with the official, but the ref stays firm. Mosh wastes way too much time trying to argue his case and ends up getting caught from behind with the Means to an End Driver! Mosh’s head bounces off the mat and Lexi covers with a lateral press, but this time it’s her turn to be shocked by Mosh’s arm shooting off of the mat!
With both competitors back to their feet, Mosh tries to whip Lexi to the ropes but gets reversed. Lexi sends Mosh bouncing and ducks her head for a back drop, but the VIP stops in his tracks and plants her with a DDT! Lexi Gold is down and Chris Mosh rubs his hands together to signal it’s all over. He pulls Gold to her feet and hooks her up into a fisherman’s suplex, bridging over into a pinning combo - the patented Moshplex! Wait… both wrestlers’ shoulders are flat on the mat! The referee counts 1-2-3! And the bell sounds, leaving the crowd in confusion…
Until the ref raises the hand of Chris Mosh!
WINNER - CHRIS MOSH
(Match Time 11:08)
What the heck just happened? Did the ref flip a coin? Both sets of shoulders were down!
No way, Jacuinde! Chris Mosh was the clear winner, just like I said he would be!
VS.
(Long live the reckless and the brave
I don't think I wanna be saved
My song has not been sung
So long live us)
This time out, Sierra comes out hobbling. She still has a look of confidence on her face and she still puts on a show of excitement for the fans, but it’s clear her leg is not in good shape as she limps noticeably to the ring before rolling in under the bottom rope rather than leaping over the top as usual.
The crowd cheers once more as Molly Barnes enters from behind the curtain. She’s got some tape around her shoulder and lower ribs, but is otherwise seemingly in good spirits as she makes her way down to the ring.
Molly makes sure to clap hands with fans as she moves, and as soon as she enters the ring she walks up to Sierra Silver and shakes her hand, showing respect for the woman who came to her aid after the attack by Elijah Copeland.
DING!
Molly and Sierra work back and forth with each other. Each one getting some impressive takedowns using beals and snap mares. Momentum shifts after Sierra looks for a kick to the midsection, which Molly catches and spins into a dragonscrew… Sierra yelps in pain and clutches the hurt leg, staying down on the mat.
Molly looks genuinely concerned for Sierra and backs off, letting the referee check on Silver - at which point, Elijah Copeleand comes running down the entrance ramp with a steel chair in hand! The crowd tries to get Molly’s attention but it’s no use as she is too focused on Sierra… and Copeland hops up to the apron and slams the chair hard against Molly’s back and head!
Molly Barnes collapses onto her face, and the referee as well as Sierra Silver are none the wiser as to what transpired. Elijah Copeland heads back away from the ring with a huge smile, and Sierra pulls herself up to her feet and finally sees Molly down and out. Confused, she looks to the official for guidance… but the ref just tells her the match has to go until there’s a winner. She pulls herself up to the top turnbuckle and steadies herself, then leaps off with a Silver Sun Rising to the back of Molly Barnes! She rolls Molly over and hooks a leg for the 1-2-3!
WINNER - SIERRA SILVER
(Match Time 4:47)
This is a travesty, Bath… Molly Barnes never even had a chance in that match! Elijah Copeland couldn’t handle getting embarrassed by someone he sees as inferior to him, and he coast Molly her opportunity!
Oh knock it off, J! Elijah Copeland should be the one going to the finals against Chris Mosh, not Sierra Silver OR Molly Barnes! He’s just reminding everyone here in Vanuatu who the REAL main eventer is!
It’s time to knock the roof off, Bath… and I mean that literally! It’s a three-way implosion match for the title of XWF’s first EVER Lord of Violence!
Hold the phone, Jacuinde… I’m getting word from the back that things might be changing… can we get some cameras back there?
We see Johnny Hitmaker and Hide Yamazaki, who is FUMING mad, standing outside of Tula Keali’i’s closed office door.
Johnny is banging away at the door rapidly and without any sign of stopping, shouting at the top of his lungs.
Johnny Hitmaker: “Now Tula, you let me make this PERFECTLY CLEAR! My man Hide Yamazaki, the Strong Style Satanist, was ROBBED unjustly in the first round of the IDL Tournament! No one informed us we were having BYZANTINE rules in place! Hide Yamazaki should have had a fair chance to defeat Sierra Silver, not that FARCE that took place!!!”
Hide snarls, shaking the heavy chains over his shoulders.
Johnny Hitmaker: “I demand… no I INSIST that you make things right! Or you’ll be dealing with DEATH WISH-”
Tula’s door swings open suddenly, and the Madness General Manager stands face to face with Hitmaker… does Johnny flinch? It looks like he flinched.
Tula Keali’i: “Death Wish? Is that what you said, Johnny? Well… I tell you what. I didn’t get a say in creating Vinnie Lane’s nonsense Lord of Violence division… but I’m still the one running the show here tonight, and I can sure as HELL book the talent signed to this roster how I see fit. So you want another chance for Hide Yamazaki to shine tonight? Then he’s gonna get that chance…”
Johnny Hitmaker smiles from ear to ear, and he nods at Hide.
Tula Keali’i: “Because he’s going inside that imploding building… the Lord of Violence match is now a FOUR-way last man standing affair! Have fun, ‘Death Wish.’”
Johnny stammers something to Hide, but Yamazaki actually looks pleased by the news. He claps a massive hand on Hitmaker’s back and then heads off toward the ringside area.
Well we wouldn’t be able to call it MADNESS if things didn’t get shaken up from time to time!
Looks like this match just got a lot wilder… I can’t wait any more, let’s take it on-site!
Backstage, we find skeletal masked "Dark Warrior" Micheal Graves kneeled down in a corner aggressively eating what appears to be tapioca pudding out of a human skull when XWF owner, Vincent Lane segways into the scene through a cloud of bubble gum vape! Vinnie double-takes as he zooms past Gravy then spins a few doughnuts before coming to a stop right in front of him. Lane leans in uncomfortably close to his one-time lover who seems completely unphased as he stabs the spoon into the pudding and giggles with delight at every bite!
“Um, Micheal, why are you here, and what in the Hell is it that you're doing!?”
Graves seems just as confused as Lane!
“I don’t know! You tell me! You’re the one who told me that I had to be here tonight, and I'm eating, obviously!”
Vinnie's eyes bulge, his cheeks flush, and that little vein on the left side of his head begins to swell and thump rapidly!
“NO YOU IDIOT, NOT HERE! *ANNOYED SCOFF* You’re supposed to be at the sight of the IMPLODING CONDEMNED BUILDING LAST MAN STANDING MATCH to crown a new LORD OF VIOLENCE! You know, the deathmatch division I emailed you about!?”
Everything except for the word deathmatch seems to go over Gravy's head as his eyes light up with joy!
“You booked me in a deathmatch! That's perfect! It just so happens that I have my lucky spoon with me tonight!"
Micheal jumps to his feet wielding the spoon like a knife. He begins swiping at the air and making squishy stabby sounds with his mouth!
"Please tell me I'm fighting " GIRLS DON'T POOP"!? I'll carve her a propper asshole, I will!"
Lane has had enough!
“WOULD YOU SHUT UP!?!”
Graves freezes in place and stops breathing, trying REALLY HARD to not make a sound. This annoys Lane even more!
"Stop it!"
Gravy looks left and right, unsure what to do. He remains still, but sweat inexplicably pours down the brow of his mask.
Agitation to the max, but Vinnie closes his eyes and takes a moment to collect himself before he continues.
"Look, you're NOT wrestling on Madness. I invited you down here because I'm putting YOU in charge of our new Deathmatch division! You would know that, and where you actually needed to be, had you read the email that I sent!"
Graves deflates with a long drawn out sigh.
"...You don't want me to wrestle?"
"No! In fact, I forbid you from touching the talent at all when you're officiating these things!"
"OFFICIATING!? You've gotta be fucking kidding! How can you expect me to enforce the rules? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HALF OF THEM ARE!"
"Relax, these being Deathmatches, they're a little light on the rules. All you really need to do is be about to count on your fingers and know to stop a match before anyone actually dies. Easy-peasy!" One look at Gravy and Lane's confidence is shot! "Well, maybe not for you, but you'll do fiiiiine!"
Gravy doesn't seem convinced!
"Oh... Kay... Well, why me!?"
"Because this job has been classified as TOO EXTREME by the National Referee Union!"
"Deathmatches are too extreme!? What kinda pussies you got working around here?"
"Well, to be fair, they didn't protest until I told them about the imploding building!"
Micheal seems to finally get the bigger picture here.
"Oh, I see what it is, instead of dropping your stupid idea-"
Vinnie quickly finishes his sentence for him!
"-I'm just going to drop the stupid dude into the middle of it! Yeah, and if he refuses, he can kiss his keister goodbye, because he'll be blackballed by the last wrestling promotion willing to employ him! So, are you going to get down there and call this match, ooooooor...."
"You know, I'm dumb, but I'm not THAT dumb! You want a Gravy you can take your transphobic revenge on!?"
Vinnie quickly interjects! "This has nothing to do with THAT!"
"FINE! Whatever, it doesn't matter anyway. I'm NOT doing this, but we've got JUST THE GUY for you!"
Graves' eyes roll into the back of his head as he goes limp on his feet. Lane looks on curiously as he inspects Graves and wonders for a moment if he’s still alive. That is until Gravy springs to life and he quickly plumps up and takes on a new but somehow familiar form!
“Micheal Graves reporting for duty, sir! I understand that I have a Deathmatch that I am responsible for officiating?”
Lane. is. flabbergasted!
“... Oh great, another one… So, what should I call you?”
“Uh, my name is Micheal?” He says with uncertainty.
Lane shakes his head no.
“No, that’s WAY too confusing. You’re kinda fat, I guess I’ll just call you Chubby Gravy from now on. Okay, now that that's settled, GET TO WORK CHUBBY!”
With a hardy nod, Graves POOFS out without a word!
Chubby Gravy POOFS onto the scene where we find Hide Yamazaki and Jacki O’Lantern patiently waiting outside of the building. Chubby Gravy spots the two of them standing a good distance apart, and then surveys the area for the other guys to no avail.
Chubby Gravy: “Uh, where’s Thraxx and Darren at?” Micheal says as he looks back to Hide, then Jacki, who motions towards the abandoned building!” ”Oh… Well, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?! LEEEEEEEEET’S GET REEEEEEEEEEEADY TOOOO CRUUUUUUUUUUUM-BUUUUUUUULE!!!”
Crickets as Chubby Gravy calls for the bell, and of course, there is no bell here sooooo…
Hide instigates a brawl with Jacki and the two go back and forth while working their way towards the entrance to the building. Suddenly and HUGE BLAST OF FIRE explodes shards of glass from a second-story window that rains down over those below, causing Gravy to POOF inside to investigate!
Inside, Gravy reappears to find Thraxx tossing Molotov Cocktails out of a huge shoulder sack at a Darren Dangerous who is narrowly escaping the ensuing flames! Downstairs Jacki and Hide are still brawling it out, with Jacki gaining the upper hand and whipping Hide through a doorway and into an old musty bedroom with a long abandoned soiled mattress on the floor that luckily mostly breaks Hides fall! Hide fights through the wreckage to return to his feet, only to step right into a spinning back fist from Jacki O’Lantern that’s quickly followed up by a DDT!
Upstairs, Darren Dangerous dives into a tub to avoid an explosion of fire! Suddenly an alarm fires off in the room! Graves looks into the camera!
“Oh shit! HE just tripped a switch!” Gravy yells before diving into another room for cover!
3!
2!!
1!!!
The floor gives way and both Darren and the tub crash down to the floor below JUST AS the bathroom implodes onto itself!
Gravy checks the burning wreckage and clearly can see Darren and the now broken tub in the room below. He waves off the attempt, Darren is still in this match apparently!
Thraxx rushes to the stairs, but he’s cut off by Jacki O’Lantern much to his surprise! She rocks him with a few well-placed blows as the two battle into a nearby bedroom! Jacki smashes Thraxx’s face into an old dresser before pulling him to set up a Taco Driver, but Thraxx drops to the floor and quickly stabs her in the foot with a fork to make his escape!
Back downstairs Hide and Darren Dangerous are trading shots back and forth with neither willing to give up an inch! Darren finds an opening and connects with a Meathook clothesline that sends Hide crashing hard into the dirt carpet! Dust flys, but Hide is quick to return to his feet and even quicker to catch a stunning chin uppercut that dazes him long enough for Darren to hit a big superplex! BUT DARREN ISN’T FINISHED YET! The big man lets out a mighty roar before pulling Hide to his feet to set up the Arabian Facebuster, but Hide says no way to that and flips Darren over his shoulder! However, Darren Dangerous, in an exibition of truly superior agility, manages to not only land on his feet, but backflip into a hurricanrana attempt that sends Hide crashing through a wall and back into the main hall! Darren calls for a suicide dive, but Hide quickly shakes the cobwebs out of his head, and drywall dust out of his hair before setting his sights on Mr. Dangerous belting out a fierce, fear inducing war cry! Hide charges for Darren, who waits till the last second before stepping in with a crushing big boot. Hide is dazed, but Darren isn’t taking any chances! He peels Hide up and hits a DDT, followed by a piledriver for good measure! After that, Darren runs up against the furthest wall and shoots back in with a diving leg drop!
Now obscenely winded, Darren chokes for air as he lays beside Hide Yamazaki, exhausted.
Elsewhere, Jacki is seen searching room to room for Thraxx, or anyone really. She has a definite limp from where Thraxx stabbed her in the right foot earlier. Jacki cautiously approaches the closet doors before quickly opening them, half expecting to find someone hiding, whatever she finds, causes her face to light up as we cut back to Darren Dangerous and Hide Yamazaki, who is beginning to stir. Darren and Hide meet on their knees with an intense staredown that quickly advances to the two men trending big right hands! Hide rocks Darren, hitting him with three consecutive shots, but Darren breaks the streak by grabbing Hide’s junk with a meathook grip! Hide yelps in pain as Darren leads him to his feet by the balls before pulling him into a German suplex and launching him into the wall above, and then onto the bed. Darren climbs up onto the bed as well and pulls Hide in for something, but Hide slips him, ducks beneath, and launches Darren with a belly to back off of the queen size and through a wall into the next room causing an alarm to sound!
3!!!
2!!
1!
A loud boom from the well-placed explosives brings the roof down on Darren Dangerous and Gravy begins the count!
1!
2!!
3!!!
4!!!!
5!!!!!
6!!!!!!
7!!!!!!!
8!!!!!!!!
9!!!!!!!!!
10!!!!!!!!!!
“Double D, Eliminated!”
Cut to the main hall where we hear the steady revving of a chainsaw, followed by Thraxx hauling ass down the steps and to the front door, where he scrambles to escape, but as he tries to open the door he’s knocked on his ass by someone on the other side bursting through and the shocking reveal that
DEAN ROSE IS HERE!
Thraxx and Rose begin trading blows and Hide ambushes, Jacki, at the steps causing her to drop the chainsaw! Hide has Jacki on the defensive, but she slips a right hand and shoves Hide into the railing, and ties him up with an Octopus Stretch as Dean Rose and Thrax fight into another room!
Thrax hits a punch that lands squarely on Dean Rose's temple and staggers him. Thrax steps in, following up the big punch with another punch that also sends Dean reeling! Thrax follows that up with yet another big punch, this one sending Dean against the wall! As he springs off, Thrax hits a high ups dropkick that sends Dean Rose crashing through the wall and into the next room just as Hide flips Jacki over his shoulder to escape the Octopus Stretch! He hammers down a few heavy hands to keep her down then turns his attention towards Dean Rose who is reeling on the floor. Dean and Hide lock eyes for a moment. Dean breaks the tension by remarking, " Wow, you sure are one ugly son of a bitch"! Hide removes the big heavy chain from his neck as Dean pushes up to his feet and snaps out a retractable baton! Hide swings the chain like a belt! Dean blocks the arm, but the heavy chain still smacks across his shoulders causing him to wince! Unrelenting, Dean fires back with retaliatory wacks of his own across Hide's neck and shoulder with the baton! Hide staggers back, dropping the chain in the process. Dean gives chase, but doesn't expect an unarmed Hide to lunge at him as he does! Dean swings the baton, but Hide captures the arm and suplexes, Dean, through a pillar! Gravy begins the count! He makes it to 3 when Jacki attacks Hide with a broom sweeping him all over the room with shots to the legs. Rose makes it up by 9 but is more or less out of it. Jacki takes Hide off of his feet with a broomstick-assisted Russian Legsweep! Jacki moves in for the kill when that sneaky Thrax comes out of nowhere with a can of Vinnie Lane's Aquanet and a lighter!
Jacki yelps and covers her face! Thrax uses the distraction to his advantage!
HELLBOUND DDT!
Gravy starts the count as Hide jumps to his feet and shoves Thrax. Thrax shoves him back and then the two are throwing lefts and rights at each other with reckless abandon! Jacki digs deep to break the count, but immediately kneels down in exhaustion! Thrax now has Hide on the defensive as he rains in strike after strike, but then, out of nowhere, Hide snaps off a Capture Suplex out of nowhere! Thrax bounces right back to his feet only to catch a series of knee lifts followed by "The Devil" (High-Angle Belly to Back Suplex)! Upon impact, the floor gives way and both men tumble to the basement below! Gravy begins a double count on both men, with Hide answering the call at 8, and Thrax not showing any signs of life, even as Gravy reaches ten!
"THRAX IS ELIMINATED!"
Through the dust and carnage, Dean Rose and Jacki O'Lantern begin to stir. It's hard to breathe or see with all of the dust flying around. Jacki and Dean both make it to their feet, but are unaware that the other is in the room with them until they back into each other. Dean and Jacki instinctively turn and begin throwing punches! Dean gets the upper hand with his vast brawling experience and he sends Jacki on the defensive as they brawl up the stairs to the rooms above! Dean grabs the back of Jacki's head and smashes her face into the railing a few times causing Jacki to drop to a knee. Dean pulls on her hair, leading her up the steps. Once there, he lines up with the stairs and looks to be setting up for a Fallaway Slam, but Jacki still has a little fight left in her and sends her pointy elbow into his abdomen causing him to back away a few steps. Jacki jumps to her feet and hits a running dropkick that sends Dean flying down the stairs where he crashes just a little over halfway down and rolls to the bottom where he lays lifeless! Gravy is there to begin the count! By 7 it Dean makes it to his hands and knees and it looks like he might make it! Gravy makes it to nine and obviously hesitates slightly in his count to give Dean a chance! Dean pushes up to his feet!!! Only to immediately lose his footing and collapse back to the floor, forcing Gravy to count him out!
"DEAN ROSE ELIMINATED"
Hide Yamazaki appears at the bottom of the staircase with a defiant roar before charging up the stairs! Jacki leaps down the stairs, tackling Hide halfway up! The two of them tumble and crash on top of Dean Rose! Neither move and Gravy starts the count. Lots of grunting and fierce shows of willpower are on display as both Hide and Jacki fight through the pain to beat Gravy's count. Hide calls for Jacki to take her shot, and with a nod she takes a step back before stepping in with a spinning back fist! Hide is rocked and stumbles back a few steps, but quickly shakes it off and with a wide-eyed battle cry he charges in with a stiff forearm! Jacki takes the stiff blow to the sternum and stumbles back coughing.
Gutwrench Powerbomb from Hide Yamazaki!
NO! JACKI CATCHES HIDE WITH A MODIFIED HEAD SCISSORS AND USES HER WEIGHT TO FLIP HIM OVER!
Jacki ties Hide up with The Darkest Hour (Chicken Wing Facelock)! When the warning alarm suddenly sounds off and a digital woman's voice informs us that we have 30 seconds before the entire building will implode! Gravy looks nervous as the countdown begins!
30!
29!
Jacki doesn't release the hold, but Hide is struggling and fighting to escape with everything he has! Eventually, Hide escapes as Jacki releases the hold looking for something to finish this quicker! She sets up for Black Cat Crossing (Taco Driver), but Hide slips it and tries for a back body drop, Jacki flips over him, landing on her feet! Hide turns right into a Discus Forearm, but he no-sells it and fires back with a Spinning Back Fist of his own!
8!
Pissed, Jacki throws everything she has behind her next Spinning Back Fist and it staggers Hide, allowing her to successfully set up Black Cat Crossing (Taco Driver)! She lifts him up, when!!!
1!!!
Smoke and debris are everywhere with no sign of the remaining competitors. After a few moments, some of the rubble begins to rattle around, and eventually, a hand burst through the debris. As they dig themselves out of the rubble, we eventually realize that it's Hide Yamazaki crawling to victory!? Gravy POOFS to the top of the rubble. He sees Hide Yamazaki, who looks utterly defeated, but is somehow still on his feet, barely, but no sign of Jacki. After a moment, Gravy begins the count and makes it all the way to ten without anything happening. Gravy looks concerned as he announces the elimination.
"JACKI O'LANTERN... eliminated."
Hide celebrates his victory as rescue workers search for Jacki O'Lantern.
WINNER - HIDE YAMAZAKI
(Match Time 30:00)
Gravy walks up to Hide and shakes his hand before awarding him his prize for becoming the very first Madness LORD OF VIOLENCE!!!
Hide Yamazaki seems confused by his prize, but Gravy doesn't stick around to answer any questions as he POOFS away only to POOF back with a somehow major injury-free Jacki O'Lantern, who he hands over to the caring arms of the XWF EMT's.
And Hide Yamazaki is the first champion crowned on the Madness Brand! The Lord of Violence! WOW! What an incredible fight that was!
I’ve never seen anything like it, J… how the Hell are they gonna outdo that one ?
No time to wonder, Bath, it’s main event time! We started with seven, and now we are down to just two… Sierra Silver… Chris Mosh… one of them is leaving here tonight as the FIRST IDL Champion of XWF Madness. The energy is palpable right now!
Total insanity… Who would have predicted this pairing in the finals? Not many I imagine. But I made my bet and I’m sticking with it, Jacuinde. Chris Mosh. IDL Champion. That’s the BATH BOMB of the night!
We’ll work on your catchphrase…
VS.
(Long live the reckless and the brave
I don't think I wanna be saved
My song has not been sung
So long live us)
Sierra Silver slowly makes her way out from the back, her knee heavily wrapped. She winces as she makes her way down the ramp, but the look in her eye is one of total and absolute focus. She has come to win, and the fans are cheering her on for it every step of the way.
By the time she reaches the ring, the entire crowd is chanting SIERRA! SIERRA! SIERRA! And as she gingerly gets into the squared circle, a smile is plastered on her face. She limps to a corner and waits.
Chris Mosh walks out from behind the curtains and holds his arms over his head as he slowly struts to the ring. He smirks at the few fans who try to reach out for a high five, then fakes them out by pulling his hand away quickly and laughing.
Mosh takes his sweet time arriving at the ring, and when he does he stands outside of it for a good few moments ust pointing up at Silver and making fun of her bum leg by mock limping around and pretending to cry in pain.
Eventually he enters the ring and stands in the opposite corner, watching as the IDL Championship belt is presented to the referee and held high for the crowd to see.
DING!
At the sound of the bell Sierra Silver limps forward and Chris Mosh immediately dives low and tackles her at the bad knee. Silver somersaults and crashes to the mat, grabbing at her leg, and Mosh wastes zero time getting back up and kicking her in the knee and thigh repeatedly while she yelps and wails.
Mosh keeps his focus on the leg without wavering, throwing every leg-based attack he can think of at his opponent. Indian death locks. Spinning toe holds. Half crabs. Figure fours. Sierra Silver spends the beginning of this match entirely on her back, unable to ever get to her feet from the nonstop assault on her leg from Chris Mosh.
Mosh keeps the heat on Silver and once again starts to entangle her in a submission focusing on her leg… but Silver digs deep and finds the wherewithal to jump into Mosh’s face and execute a GREENHEART! Mosh hits the deck, stunned, but the impact on her own bad leg has Silver down and writhing as well! She drags herself to cover Mosh, but he get a shoulder up at 2… and then he snatches Sierra Silver’s ankle and locks in a DEEP kneebar submission!
Silver is trapped and squirming for her life, screeching in pain. She stretches out as much as she can, and she finally manages to reach her hands to the bottom rope, and the referee forces Chris Mosh to break the hold. Mosh is frustrated but reluctantly allows Silver to get to her feet.
When Silver is back to a vertical base, Mosh moves in for the kill… but Silver trips him up with a drop toe hold and soon he finds himself draped over the second rope, dazed. Sierra Silver sees her chance and hits the ropes, running as best she can. She spins through the ropes and smashes Chris Mosh in the face with the Si-1-9!
Silver grimaces through the pain of the impact as Mosh is sent careening onto his back. Sierra ascends to the top rope and stands tall as the crowd cheers her on, calling for the Silver Sun Rising!
But Sierra’s leg gives out on her!
Silver falls from the top as her injured knee buckles, and she falls forward right onto her face. Chris Mosh shakes off the effects of the big move, and he grabs Silver right as she lifts her head from the canvas, and hooks her into a fisherman’s suplex into a bridge! The Moshplex! And he hooks onto Silver’s hurt leg while the referee counts 1-2-3!
WINNER AND NEW IDL CHAMPION - CHRIS MOSH
(Match Time 9:11)
What a main event! Sierra Silver almost pulled it off at the end, but her body betrayed her!
I was RIGHT! I told you it was gonna be Mosh, Jacuinde! I’m going STRAIGHT to Vegas after we leave here, man, I have got the hot hand tonight! Woo!
The referee hands Chris Mosh his newly won IDL Championship belt as confetti falls from the rafters.
What a night! Thank you everyone for tuning into the first Madness… we’ll have even more for you in store next time. From Jacuinde Cauhtemoc and this is Bath Saltzmann… goodnight everybody!
CHRIS MOSH DID IT! I WAS RIGHT! I WAS RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!
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