The Interview:


Our scene opens in a one on one setting with STEVE SAYORS and CHRIS PAGE. The two men are sitting in director style chairs in front of a Wednesday Night Warfare backdrop. Steve is wearing a light blue suit with a matching blazer on top of a white dress shirt that’s neat and pressed while CHRIS on the other hand is dressed way down in pair of black jeans, black combat boots and a white t-shirt with black bold print that says “Witty Phrase Here.”.


Today we’re here to sit down one on one with CHRIS in an OLD SCHOOL style promo that is sure to bore the shit out of UNKNOWN SOLDIER, which is cool because at least he’d know how it feels when anyone other than SHANE or PETER GILMOUR sits through one of his latest attempts at shock value. STEVE is counted down by his producer as he looks into the camera and welcomes us to this exclusive interview.


STEVE SAYORS- “Good morning and welcome to a sit down interview with a man; good or bad, has the XWF talking, my guest today is “CHRONIC” CHRIS PAGE.” The camera takes a wide shot revealing PAGE sitting next to STEVE, his eyes a little heavy from the sweet cannabis he had partaken in before stepping into the studio… and why wouldn’t he be high, he’s got to sell the world on a match with Unknown Soldier that changes daily.


STEVE SAYORS- “I want to thank you for taking the time out of your schedule to join me because there’s a lot of information we need to cover.” Depending on your definition of information would determine if we really have a lot to cover.


CHRIS PAGE- “It’s not like I had much of a choice.” CHRIS states with sheer sarcasm as it escapes the tip of his tongue as he softly states.


STEVE SAYORS- “You’ve certainly had an interesting month or so to say the very least but I’m more interested in talking about and getting your thoughts on your actions over the last two weeks. It’s no secret you garnered a lot of mainstream attention by kicking the teeth out of a ten year old child’s mouth to even on the last edition of Warfare following a victory over PETER GILMOUR you laid out a female…” STEVE is interrupted by the audible laughter of CHRIS PAGE. We see CHRIS try and muffle the laughter as he cups his left hand over his mouth which causes Steve to respons. ”I’m not really sure what’s so funny about all of this when you really think about the gravity of these actions.” CHRIS composes himself as he lowers his left hand from over his mouth before answering.


CHRIS PAGE- “What’s funny about all of this revolves around the one man leading the charge is the very man that booked a eight year old in a match on national television in two thousand fourteen. When it comes to kicking that kid’s teeth out I stand by what I did and will do it all over again if it presented itself, and what’s funny about dropping a bitch like a bad habit is she put herself harm’s way and paid the price. You got bitches fighting dudes on bi-weekly programming in this federation yet I defend myself after being slapped and I’m the bad guy. Get the fuck out of here.” The fact that all of this isn’t a dead issue by now is mind boggling to me, it’s almost as mind boggling as Soldier trying to form a rational opinion after he’s been defeated in this mental game with each and every step we’ve taken thus far since my challenge has been answered. ”The hypocrisy of SHANE and all those other ass hats is off the charts. Reality is I don’t give a fuck about it, my mind is channeled towards next Wednesday Night and dealing with this walking fantasy known simply as Unknown Soldier.”


STEVE SAYORS- “It marks your second opportunity at the XWF Universal Championship in what started as a Hell in a Cell with a hole to Hell before going to a wrestling match before going to now a “I’m a Bitch” match all because according to Soldier you don’t know how to pay attention,”


CHRIS PAGE- “That’s what he’d like you and all the sheep to believe then cool. He’s spent the first piece of this week harping on lack of attention or paying attention to what he has to say, and as usual I played this my way having him legitimately believe I wasn’t keep tabs to now being completely discombobulated over what the hell he wants to do. It’s been fun, truly it has.” Chris turns and winks at the camera as Steve picks right up.


STEVE SAYORS- “You claim that Unknown Soldier is simply shock value with his worshipping of Satan as in your eyes there’s no such thing as Satan…” Chris quickly chimes in cutting Steve off before he can go any further.


[green]CHRIS PAGE- “There’s isn’t a God either, just so we’re clear.” Steve picks right back up as the statement on God visibly makes him uncomfortable.


STEVE SAYORS- “Earlier this week you literally peed all over the Satanic Bible; regardless if you believe or you don’t there’s plenty of people out there that do believe in God and Satan; do you think you might have went too far in that regard?”


CHRIS PAGE- “Absolutely not.” Chris states with sheer confidence as he continues. ”If people are foolish enough to believe in God or Satan you might as well say you believe in the Easter Bunny or Santa Clause because it’s all the same shit. It’s propaganda that’s been made up and propaganda that you’re conditioned to believe in and then you have people like me who sees things for what they are, and unfortunately we live in a world today that’s been completely and totally fucked beyond repair; that’s not because of God or because of Satan, that’s because people are idiots… period.” There’s a brief pause from Chris before he continues. [green]”As far as taking a piss all over the Satanic Bible and if I went too far let me ask you would it be going too far to piss all over the Bible as well? They’re both figments of imagination, right? Can you verify the events took place in either the Bible or the Satanic Bible? There’s documentation that states they’re both fake, so it’s a matter of what YOU believe, and as far as CHRIS PAGE is concerned I choose to believe that snakes don’t talk and I choose to believe that large red men with horns on their head don’t rule an underworld full of flames.” There’s another pause from CHRIS before he takes it a step further. [green]”Then you have guys like Soldier that will slaughter kids in the name of Satan, that rely on fear and feeding on fear to fuel his needs. He desperately wants to use fear as his number one weapon against anyone that might stand opposite him, only issue this go around is I don’t fear any man, women or child… that’s a shoot.”


STEVE SAYORS- “What happens if you fail to capture the title and you’re beaten by Soldier? It seems like he’s certainly got a hard on for wanting to beat you.”


CHRIS PAGE- “Strange in its right considering I’m a nobody in his eyes, the very eyes that he’s tried to sell us all on that he’s a hated man but apparently he’s the voice of the XWF Universe? Not really sure how all that works out but it sounds like a cool story.” Chris casually states. ”Not to be a dick but I’ve made it known that if I don’t capture the Universal Title that I’m relegated back to the end of the line. I’ve never asked for anything that I don’t deserve, I don’t care what anyone’s argument may or may not be to the contrary doesn’t change the fact that I’m here and I’m poised to finally capture lightning in a bottle by claiming the one belt that’s eluded me. Soldier doesn’t have to worry about me blaming the front office or the people they hand pick to “evaluate” talent of promo abilities to in ring savvy. I’ve made no mistake about it when I say I’m not here for friends, and I certainly don’t have many of them on this roster which will make me the underdog in any situation I walk into here, I’m cool with that because throughout my entire career I’ve always found a way to elevate to the top level, sure I’ve won the World Title here but the World Title was never the Universal Title. This isn’t about good versus evil and it isn’t about God versus Satan or it isn’t even about how many teeth I kick out compared to people Soldier has a part in slaughtering… this is about ME taking the one thing I want, Soldiers Universal Championship.” The sheer seriousness in the tone that Chris speaks bring chills up your spine as Chris intently gazes at Steve as he continues. ”The only reason Soldier is relevant to me at all rests with the Universal title, it could be anyone else from Robert Main to Vinnie himself carrying that title and I still wouldn’t be denied here and now. This is the moment in which I either succeed or I fail on my own merit and abilities. No excuses. No remorse.”


STEVE SAYORS- “This battle is set to take place at Liberty Stadium where over twenty thousand fans are going to jam pack the stadium, do you have any thoughts about this event already selling out?”


CHRIS PAGE- “You’re welcome are the first two words that come to mind when it comes to how fast it sold out. The fans in Wales know that now more than ever they’ve got the chance to witness history in the making when I slap around some thirty year old that thinks it’s cool to wear makeup and scratch at his crotch like he’s got a case of crabs that never seen to go away.” Chris shifts his attention directly towards the camera before he continues. ”Soldier, now I’m talking directly to you.” Chris pauses for a moment before stating. ” Du har slått en død hest, og vi har nettopp kommet i gang. Vi har en lang vei å gå før vi kommer til Warfare, og du har allerede slått deg ut. Det er søtt å se hvor opprørt du har fått bevise poeng, noen av dem er uaktuelle og ikke relevante, mens andre bare gir en overdrivelse for å passe til fortellingen du prøver å fortelle. Jeg har ikke tenkt å late som om du eller ordene dine har noen vekt, nei, ordene dine har ikke falt på døve ører, de er bare ikke relevante nok til å garantere et svar. Jeg ser faktisk frem til å se hvordan du reagerer nå, når "mesterens fordel" ikke lenger er i ligningen, og jeg har avslørt bare litt av spillet som jeg har spilt som du har kjøpt inn som det gode liten tispe som du er” Chris stops for a moment before he continues while a very confused Steve Sayors looks on. ” Du har fortsatt å se forbi meg som om jeg ikke er en trussel mot deg eller din livsførsel som universalmester, det er den første feilen og den siste feilen jeg kommer til å tillate deg å gjøre. Jeg er så ekte som de kommer når det gjelder å ta bort den tittelen ... men når du innser at det kommer til å være for sent ... og når du får en ny kamp, vil vi ha en BORING gammeldags Pro Wrestling-kamp!” Chris finally shifts his attention back over towards Steve Sayors who looks perplexed and confused with what he’s just heard as Chris spouts out with sheer sarcasm. ”He’s Norwegian, he’ll get it.”


STEVE SAYORS- “Is there any truth to the rumors that you have a few people watching your back in the event things get way out of control on Warfare?”


CHRIS PAGE- “I’d hope that nobody elects to get involved in this affair and let nature take its course with me leaving with the Universal Title, but yes there’s truth to the rumors that while I don’t have many friends on this roster, currently, doesn’t mean I don’t have friends previously on this roster that is just waiting for the moment to jump if they need too. However it all plays out I either walk out with the Universal Title or I go to the back of the line… I elect to leave with the Universal Title”


The scene fades.














Words from the Stoned One:


It’s certainly been a fun couple of days thus far toying around with a dork that worships a being that doesn’t exist but I think now it’s time we get down to some serious business because playtime is over and now it’s time to clock in and go to work. Over the last six months I have been wrapped around the Universal Title scene like a python wrapped around its prey, I became squeezing the life of it while revolutionizing what was a bland, dull and boring landscape filled with talents like LUX, BIG D, CENTURION and a host of others did absolutely nothing but be complacent with the boringness that was this federation. I did that. I sparked the fire that made talents WANT to come out of the shadows and step back into the light, I slit the throat of complacency and watched it bleed out like one of the children from a SOLDIER promo.


I take pride in the fact that JAMES RAVEN picked up that phone and called me to come back and lead a team at War Games. He didn’t do it because he liked me, he didn’t do it because he wanted to… he did it because he respects me and what I’m able to accomplish in the business I know and love as professional wrestling. The deal we made was for one night, and on that night locked inside War Games with Apex-Prophecy as I eliminated half their team by own hands it came down to ROBERT and I. When we traded blows in that ring I knew we’d draw money.


Not only would we draw money but we’d be able to do something this federation hadn’t had in a long, long time…


Something the fans invested in.


We did just that.


All that was derived from my mind. Now, I tried to explain this before and perhaps now is a better time to dig a little deeper when it comes to how my mind works. I’ve been on both sides of the coin when it comes to the physical side of the business as well as the shot calling side of the business so I have a better perception of how things work; ROBERT and I busted our ass to give the XWF fans something to sink their teeth into from me pretending to give a shit if this federation lives or dies and using it to fuel a story that brought in so many moving parts and utilized many different people at different times for different things. At the end of the day the XWF will be around as long as it wants to be around and as long as there’s someone else who wants to run it whenever Vin-Man gets bored enough with it. My point is that we created a buzz that was going to culminate before “the powers that be” thought it’d be a cool idea to have you cash in a briefcase. Months of ground work simply tossed to the waste side… months of investment and the “boys” giving a shit about what they’re seeing shit all over, and for what? So Unknown Soldier and Shane could walk right on in and take their spots on top of the federation; and my how ratings took a dive and the overall product around the Universal Title went from the penthouse to the outhouse within a three count as the locker room groined out of sheer disappointment, rightfully so.


Not only did ratings tank but talent left.


This is where business comes into question when a guy who runs the show allows legitimate talent to walk away because two jackasses show up and try to get their fingerprints on everything? Hell the man responsible for me even being here has went ghost and we’d talk weekly about what the next move should be and it’s all because to two individuals; Unknown Soldier and Shane . Ever since these two shit snacks showed back up I’ve heard the rumblings in the locker room about who wants to do what to whom, and while my former mission of ending this federation has went bye-bye after the big man killed it by allowing these two ass clowns back into the fold I’ve now decided to divert my attentions elsewhere; I’m going to eliminate Unknown Soldier and Shane from the XWF Universal Title scene.


Don’t worry; I hear them both “no selling” from here.


I would say eliminate them from the XWF but that’d be like me saying I’m going to throw someone in a hole that leads to hell… it’s just not realistic, but something that is very realistic is being the man that in just under two short weeks is going to be locked inside a Cell and will have the opportunity to back up my words by taking that title away from you. This will be the first step of many because don’t think for one second that I’m going to be walking into this fight alone as that’d be foolish as fuck. I’ve already gotten some back up on hand; and these aren’t “brothers” that didn’t bother to cut promo’s these are established talents that you both know incredibly well and that want to take a piece of your asses just as bad as I do. It’s because of the both of you that the XWF legacy hasn’t been shit for a decade and hasn’t climbed out of the sophomoric state of dick jokes and unbelievable events that take place on any show.


It’s sheer nauseating to even mention either of your names and that’s not because you have “heat” like you will fool yourselves into believing.


I’m not standing before you pretending to be some savior; I’m not standing here dishing out false prophecies for the sake of hearing my own voice… I’m standing before you telling you that I’m hip to your bullshit and I’m hip to how you want to play this out and unfortunately for the both of you I’m not the only one that sees and I’m not the only one that’s to take the time in exposing it, it starts on Warfare when I get my SECOND shot at capturing something most of the masses thought I capture the first time around and that’s the XWF Universal Championship. I don’t even care if I hold it and drop it to LUX at this point because ANYONE beating me for that title would gain something over beating you for it. Your name doesn’t carry weight within this business like you’d want us all to believe, much like you’d all want us to believe you don’t care or that you’re possessed by a demon or Satan, or whatever the fuck you want to believe because it fits YOUR narrative.


One of the first rules of war is to know your enemy.


I’ve taken the time to get to know who you are and what makes you the way you are, so all these theatrics are about as entertaining as watching paint dry on its second coat.


We go from some warped Hell in a Cell to Hell bullshit to a Wrestling match, to now it’s a I’m a Bitch match… that’s cool.


Hey whenever you decided what match you want to be beaten in let me know because I can really careless what it is because the end result is going to remain the same and that’s with me standing over your broken and beaten body with nothing but a shit eating grin on my face holding up what you wasn’t MAN enough to retain over someone who is simply superior to you in every sense of the word. You sound really angry too? Have I struck a few nerves with you? I’m truly sorry that you aren’t capable enough to understand the things that I am saying or that you think you speak for the XWF Universe, but this is your mind and we have already established it’s been filled with nonsense based of a writing of lies and fairytales.


I want to congratulate you on knowing how to count to two.


That was rather impressive.


I’d also like to thank you for attempting to call out my claims that have been validated by more than one source; however, instead of breaking that imaginary “fourth wall” which is what you’re BEGGING me to do I’m going to air on the side of caution and simply throw you a thumbs up for once again repeating words from other people and expecting it to hold any fucking weight. As a matter of fact after I had enough coffee to make it through one of those snooze fests you like to call a promo I see a man that lacks the creative drive to come up with ANYTHING to throw at me that hasn’t been said thus far since I’ve returned to this company, I’m hard pressed to find any original material that hasn’t been regurgitated in some form or fashion. Please, continue on pretending you’ve got my number and continue on pretending to love being hated but claim to stand up for a XWF universe, because that totally makes fucking sense just like your deluded logic behind all these stupid fucking stipulations you’ve conjured up. IT’S HALLOWEEN SEASON! Bitch, go stand in the fucking corner with that lame excuse for being a scared little prick that has to ALWAYS have an “out” for when he takes a loss.


There’s not going to be that proverbial “out” for you regardless if it’s a Cell, if it’s a wrestling match, if it’s an I Quit, I’m a Bitch, Suck my dick, Last Man Standing, Portal to Hell it doesn’t fucking matter what you want to do at this point because all signs point towards your impending failure, I’m sure that you’re going to try and point out attention to detail, here’s some attention to detail for you… I played you. You’ve literally made the basis of some of those piss poor excuses for jabs at me based off my challenge to a wrestling match… Dude, I continued playing that card knowing you’d be stupid enough to continue to engage it. You can change this match stipulation as much time as you want but what you’re really doing is playing into the fact that I’m inside your fucking head. You talk to me like I care about what I’m won or what I’ve lost like it’s supposed to be something of mass importance. Yes, I was pinned in the middle twice by a man that up until recently hadn’t been defeated in nearly two years. The same thing happened to me that happened to so many people before me and that will happen too many people after me, and one of those instances was for the very title that hangs in the balance here and now. What you fail to realize is that on any given day any one person can be beaten by another. That rang true when MAIN survived me at Leap of Faith and it’s going to ring true when I, apparently now make you say that you’re a bitch in the face of a man whose dick you make super hard, his words not mine. In this game of chess you’re way behind and the reality of your situation grows direr with each and every day as we draw closer to what will be remembered as the ultimate failure of Unknown Solider. My mind is exactly where it needs to be to kick a few of your teeth out and my mind is exactly where it needs to be to slap around some more should he feel the need to feel froggy and jump on this ride.


Spin it however you feel the need to homie but I’m rolling into this confident that the only bitch that’s going to be made on Warfare is going to be you.


I want you to look back on this as the day that I say I told you so.

- HALL OF LEGENDS 2019
- 2019 Heel of the Year
- 2019 Locker Room Leader of the Year
- 2019 Feud of the Year w. Robert Main (you’re welcome)
- Former


With Robert "The Omega" Main

XWF World Heavyweight Champion