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Centurion · (04-11-2019)

(The rehabilitation of Centurion’s wrestling career continues, as a victory over JobberTooTree on Wednesday, with a little help from James Raven, gave Centurion his second victory in as many matches since his return to the XWF.

Still, the level of competition Centurion has faced hasn’t exactly been top shelf, and he still faces many pitfalls – namely, his lack of knowledge about the people he’s wrestling, and the recent history of the federation he’s called home for so many years. In the years Centurion has been out of the business, many wrestlers have made a name for themselves in the XWF, and Centurion knows exactly zero of them. So, it’s homework time.

We open inside the C&C Inc. training facility, only instead of inside the gym itself, we are in an old administrative office off to the side. It’s night time, and the lights inside the main facility are all out. The lights in the office are also out, save for the glow of a television, as well as a single desk light.

Sitting in the middle of the office is Centurion, notebook in hand, intently watching the X-Channel. Currently airing is World War X-Treme from March 16th, 2014. Sid Feder, former 24/7 briefcase holder and member of the all-time top 50, is forearming someone in the corner. Centurion just sighs as he scribbles something in his notebook.)

Centurion: They ranked this guy above me? Shane

really did a number on this place.

(Centurion sets his notebook down and stands up. The sound of the match and the commentators continues to call out, but Centurion seems to have lose all of his attention. Instead, he walks over to the desk, where a glass bottle of unknown brown alcoholic liquid sits. Centurion reached into one of the drawers of the desk and pulls out a glass before pouring himself a glass. He looks over to see Theo Pryce, former Universal Champion, delivering a dropkick to Feder. Centurion just raises one of his hands.)

Centurion: I don’t know who any of these people are!

(Centurion walks over to his chair with his drink and picks up the remove for the TV. He presses a button to close out of the show and return to the main menu. He yawns as he scrolls through the archives.)

Centurion: How did this place survive?! It was just a bunch of people screaming homophoobic slurs at each other and hitting each other with stuff. There’s no story, no artistry. People actually WATCHED this stuff?

(Centurion takes a sip of his drink as he scrolls to the most recent selections. He scrolls all the way up to 2019, before stopping on the first episode of the new year, the January 2nd edition of Warfare. The description of the event says “advertised main event: Azrael Erebus Vs Zane Norrison”)

Centurion: Ah, the time traveler vs the zombie. That should be good.

(Centurion presses play on the remote and the opening of the show starts up. He takes another sip of his drink before hearing his phone buzz. He sets his drink back down and picks his phone up, seeing a text from a familiar friend.)

Quote:RoxanneNovanne: U up?

(There was always a generational gap between Roxy and Centurion, even if their ages aren’t so drastically apart. Roxy was always the cool, artistic person who always seemed to have her hand on the pulse of pop culture, and was able to communicate in a way that everyone could understand.

Centurion…well, was not.)

Quote:Me: Nope. Am sleeping. Zzzz.

(Centurion sets his phone back down and takes another sip of his drink. He goes back to watch the show when his phone buzzes again.)

Quote:RoxanneNovanne: You sure? Because I have a pic of an awesome pair of boobies I was going to send you.

(Centurion thinks for a moment. This is likely a trap, but Roxy is also savvy enough to get pictures of random women’s boobs. He’s seen it done before. And the kind of women Roxy finds herself in company with are much different than the women Centurion is with. Roxy’s women usually have tattoos and piercings in places Centurion didn’t even know you could pierce.)

Quote:Me: Alright, lemme see.

(Centurion finishes the rest of his drink before setting the glass down. He goes to pick up his notebook when his phone goes off again. Centurion picks it up, and, predictable, he finds a picture that was not seeking.)

Quote:RoxanneNovanne:

(Centurion just sighs before putting his notebook down and turning the TV off. He stands up from his chair and walks towards the corner of the room. As he does, a cot with a blanket and a pillow is revealed. The sad reality of Centurion’s life is also revealed – this is where he has been living for the past few weeks. The man who has once dined with kings and lived in lavishness is now sleeping on a cot in an old gym.

Centurion crawls into the cot and lays his head down on the pillow. He goes to close his eyes before he heard his phone go off one more time. He sighs and checks the message.)

Quote:RoxanneNovanne: I got you, pervert!

------It’s So PC It’s Killing Me------

Long. Live. The Prophecy.

There’s certain things you should never doubt. Never doubt when a man missing an arm tells you there are sharks in the water. Never doubt the medical community when they tell you to vaccinate your fucking kids. And never doubt that The Prophecy will reign supreme in the XWF. Not only did we dispose of the Jobbers in, lets face it, pretty dominating fashion, but our team became one step closer to becoming whole again when Roxy Nova, aka Fine As Diamonds, aka Roxanne Novanne, aka ma bo came back to the XWF to serve what the children call “lewks”. On fleek, or some shit.

For as much as I would love to just talk about how awesome Wednesday was…and make no mistake, it WAS awesome…we must push forward, because the biggest match of my comeback is happening at the next Warfare, and it could have long term implications not just on myself, but on the XWF at large.

See, it wasn’t my intention to come back and start winning championships, especially this early into my return. I mean, I’ve only had two matches. I wasn’t even sure what kind of schedule I was going to set up for myself. But as each week has gone by I have grown stronger, and XWF management sees the positives in putting me in title contention. So, they have me fighting in a number one contenders match for the Hart Title.

Strangely enough, it’s one of the titles I’ve never held in my career, despite the title being around since the very beginning. Back in the day, that belt was designed as a stepping stone. You won the belt in order to advance to bigger and better things; however, since I won the Canadian Title almost immediately after debuting for the company, I didn’t need the Hart Title to advance, and I was above the belt ever since.

Things are different now. The Hart Title is now the second biggest title in the XWF (despite what Mastermind or anyone else says), so now is the perfect time to circle back and fill that hole in my resume.

It will not be easy. This isn’t a couple of creampuffs I’m facing this time around. I’m facing two really good wrestlers…well, one. I don’t know a damn thing about Noah Jackson except that he has a thick accent and likes to say the word “cunt” a lot. He may be the next big thing in professional wrestling…but I’m not going to hold my breath for that one.

“Notorious” Ned Kaye, on the other hand, has impressed a lot of people, myself included. It shouldn’t be surprising, given his experience outside the XWF, but…well, let’s face it, success on the indies often doesn’t translate to success in the XWF. Ned, though, has done well enough to earn the attention of Robert Main, which is no small task.

Make no mistake, though – while this may be the toughest match I’ve faced since my return, you can say that and then some for Ned. I haven’t faced anyone like Ned in my two matches back – Ned hasn’t faced anyone like me in his entire CAREER. There in lies the difference. While Ned is getting a shot on the back of a strong performance against John Rogan, I’m getting a shot just by being me. I don’t know why Noah Jackson is getting a shot – maybe Vinnie just thinks he’s funny. The front office is all rooting for me, though – because Centurion as a champion is best for business, and they know, if I win this match, I will win the Hart Title. So be prepared, because come next Warfare, Ned Kaye and Noah Jackson will both meet their…

FINAL FANTASY!

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