Threaded Mode | Linear Mode

Cadryn Tiberius · **10-24-2017, 10:47 PM**

Oh well look what we have here.

A Finn!

Not to be confused with friend.

At Least not yet. But, after I put you in your place like a reckless child, I'll offer you dinner and a spot at my table like I have for every other opponent I've beaten this year.

None of em’ ever came to dinner, though.

Kinda hurtful.

Anyways, I'm back sports fans. Doing what I do best. Puttin’ assholes in their place when they don't have anything nice to say. Actually, that's not even it. I don't care if you're Cunty McGee on her period.

Wanna know what annoys me, Finn? Dickbags who claim to be in the right, when even they know they've shit the bed on any chance of actually making a valid point.

I thought I taught you easier this week that I am not to be fucked with. I'm the best there is, the best there was, and the best there..

Wait. That's the “Excellence Of Execution” not the Essence Of Excellence.

And that’s what makes me so much better than the rest of the, well, existence. Being the Essence of Excellence isn’t just a clever name, Finn. I am in every fiber of my being, the epitome of excellence. The first words out of your mouth this time were:

“"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, CADRYN? THAT'S the best you could come up with?"

No, you fuckin’ poonjab. Of course that wasn’t the best I could come up with. I made it a point very early on to tell you it was a game, and that I was just fucking with you. I manipulated the situation for my benefit. There’s no reason for me to give you the best that I can come up with, because it’s obvious I’m going to beat you with the minimal effort I am and have been putting forth this entire time.

You said this is the highlight of your week? Seriously, dude? Your weeks are highlighted by losing? And I thought I had it rough, sheesh. Ah, but see then you make a clever little quip about how you thought you were going to effortlessly take the title that I snatched from Fatmour, and how you’re sure you’re the going to be victorious tomorrow night.

You wanna know a secret, Finn?

Hmm?

Okay, I’ll tell you, but you have to promise not to tell anyone because this is top secret information that I feel necessary to only share with my enemy…

Nothing you ever say or do will have any merit because you’re shit. Your face is shit, your promos are shit, and your career and talent will forever and always be shit.

Ah, who am I kidding? Everybody knew that already, including you. That’s why you talk a bunch of false bravado in hopes that bullshitting yourself might in turn convince me to believe it.

Nope, you’re actually shit at being shit, I don’t even know how that works because I’ve never known anyone to be this fucking bad before.

Motherfucker, how are you even going to PRETEND like you didn’t give me everything you had earlier this week? Come in here talkin’ some shit like you barely made an effort? Nigga, please. You done fuckin’ whipped out Websters Dictionary and looked up the definition to Masculinity in hopes that you’d be able to be a little more like me. I bet your ass was chapped when you got to the page just to see a picture of me suckin’ a dick and skinning a deer at the same time, wasn’t it boy?

For the record I asked him not to cum in the middle of hunting season, but you know how impatient men are.

See what I did there?

Oh and stop fuckin’ backpeddling, you and Gilmour are the worst at that shit. When you fuckin’ make a mistake, own up to it and move on. Don’t lie to me and tell me you baited me into some shit when we both know you couldn’t bait a hook with fake bait fuckin’ city bitch.

BUT, JUST SO WE’RE CLEAR, FINN..

MY DICK SO HARD RIGHT NOW I COULD CLEAN THE FUCKIN’ GUTTERS WITH IT.

Why, you ask?

CAUSE THIS NEXT PART IS SO HORRENDOUS AND OFF IT’S FUCKIN MARK THAT I MIGHT ACTUALLY CUM THINKIN’ ABOUT HOW HARD I'M FITTIN’ TO FUCK YA.

“"Generic badass? No, let's get one thing straight. Those wannabe's that step into the ring and claim to be one of the greats. Purely fictitious. Me? I'm THE best pure wrestler on this roster, I'm THE best talker, and overall I'm the role model of every single one of these fans. They look upon me and they see greatness. They look upon me and they see an immigrant who made it big here, a true symbolic representation of the American Dream... if this place wasn't a fucking cesspool."

WHY. WOULD. YOU. LIE. TO. YOUR. FAN.

Yes, fan, singular, not plural. You have exactly one fan, and that’s the motherfucker in your window in your 98 degree shed in the back of Martha’s trailer court cause you’re so bad you probably had to pay us to get on TV and fail the fuck out.

You’re so generic that Great Value called and wanted to know if they could name the Ethiopian line of cheap food after you. Honest to God, they wanted to name it “Finn” because it was beyond typical generics and on a plane all by itself. Hell, they tried to give an Ethiopian boy a box of Finn Brand Rice Krispies and that motherfucker grabbed a used syringe, injected himself with the dirty AIDS blood and then caught himself on fire before letting a Lion eat him, dick first, mind you.

THAT’S HOW FUCKIN’ BORING AND UNFUCKIN’ INTERESTING YOU ARE, FINN.

How you gonna talk to me about being fictitious?

YOU’RE the best pure wrestler?

YOU’RE the best talked?

YOU’RE a role model for the fans?

It’s obvious that YOU’RE fuckin’ too, am I right?

Let’s look at the facts.

You’re shit, we’ve talked about this. I actually don’t even have to state facts. I’m not gonna waste my time. I’ve never known one person to be the living, breathing, definition of “Shit” before, but goddamn it’s nice to meet you, fuck…

The only way they are going to need your over exaggerated, third string, no talent ass as a role model is if the world suddenly as an overabundance of toilet paper to the point that they actually don’t have enough shit in their life.

Enter: Finn.

DUDE I SWEAR TO GOD, YOU DON’T STOP GETTING ME OFF LIKE THIS, YOU’RE GONNA OWE ME A FUCKIN’ STEAK, SWEETHEART.

LOOK AT THIS COMPLETE BUTTFUCKERY OF THE WORD “TALENT”

“"You however? You disgust me? Admitting you treat this like a game? A joke? How could you WANT to be a laughingstock? Why do you want to be that one guy who will never be considered one of the greats? I mean, it surely isn't to have 'the game run it's course,' otherwise you'd have to show some sort of ability in that ring, which clearly you do not, and your win-loss record wouldn't look like a complete joke, only beating talentless hacks trying to make it big. Speaking of..."

BECAUSE BEING THE LAUGHING STOCK THAT MAKES LIKE YOU A LITTLE LESS LIKELY TO EVER SHOW YOUR FACE AROUND HERE AGAIN IS KINDA FUN, YA KNOW?

Never considered one of the greats? Well of course not, why would I be? Ain’t no need to be one of anything when you already the greatest. Get on my fuckin’ level.

Oh, and what the fuck are you even talking about, Finn?

MY WIN LOSS RECORD A COMPLETE JOKE CAUSE, LIKE I’VE SAID A MILLION TIMES OVER, TO THE OTHER AROUND HERE, WINS AND LOSSES DON’T FUCKING MATTER. BUT NO, INSTEAD OF PAYING ME ANY GODDAMN ATTENTION LIKE A GOOD LITTLE SLUT, INSTEAD OF CRADLING THE BALLS, YOU WANNA GO STRAIGHT FOR MY COCK, AND THAT’S JUST BAD MANNERS, PAL. LEARN TO TAKE IT SLOW AND MAYBE YOU’LL QUIT FUCKIN’ CHOKING RIGHT FROM THE START.

AHAHAHA.

Sorry, that was so fuckin’ awesome, I made myself cum.

Anyways, Mr. Shit, what other fucky did you have the urge to elaborate on?

“"You want to go on about how you're the only one who's able to win titles with a negative win-loss record? False. Peter Gilmour won the Hart title, and recently he's been going through numerous losses. Maverick was KNOWN for no-showing his matches and being pathetic in that ring, yet on his return match he won the title and proceeded to defend it throughout August 2015. Ghost Tank? Same story. Robbie Bourbon? Scully? Michael McBride? No, you're just the latest in a long line of losers to win championships. Even though my win-loss record doesn't look the best now, everyone can admit that when they look at me, they see a winner."

Honest, Finn, fuckin’ honest here..

I can’t ejaculate anymore. It’s literally impossible. At this point there’s a puff of air and out comes a little flag that says “bang”.

You dicklick, I didn’t say I was the only one who’s ever lost and then went on to win a title. I literally said I am the only motherfucker to lay down for the and turn around and take a belt from someone WHENEVER I WANT.

You fuckin’ downy, did you not get your grade 3?

Maverick? Who da fuq is dat? I bet he’s some piddly little shit who probably thought he was a badass because 5 years ago he beat somebody like Chasm or Gilmour, or maybe even Scully. But the problem was they’d already been washed up for years.

The only thing I see when I look at you is a walking, talking, example of how plastic surgery CAN be beneficial to some. You ugly as sin, boy, fuck..

Ain’t nothin’ winning about you. Charlie Sheen would fuck himself in the dickhole with a razorblade covered cactus before he would be within a mile of you, son.

Why?

Cause you ain’t winning…

And that’s the cut and try of it, Finny, baby.

You just ain’t got what it takes to be a winner. Not yesterday, not today, and fuckin’ certainly not tomorrow, pookie.

WAIT A MINUTE, WHAT IS THIS SHIT?!

HOW YOU GONNA LIE TO ME, I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS.

AND BY THAT I MEAN WE’D BE FRIENDS IF I WANTED EVERY WORD OUT OF YOUR MOUTH TO SOUND LIKE LIES AND SMELL LIKE THE SWEAT OF AN UNWASHED TAINTUS. TAINTUS = A TAINTED ANUS. CAUSE THAT’S WHAT YOU ARE, FINN, A BROKEN FUCKIN’ BUTTHOLE.

"I tried picking apart your fortitude and your heart? No, no, no. Don't get this confused, don't get this twisted. You have heart, yes, and you do have fortitude. Admittedly this makes you more like an annoying cockroach than an actual threat, but you DO have fortitude. No, I was just showing the fact that you can't make it in this ring. You have no talent, nothing going for you except for what I just said."

I’m starting to think you get off on liars just as much as I do with as much as you’ve been doing it lately.

You literally said some shit to me like “You don’t have the heart for the Hart.” Though as upper echelon and beyond my intelligence that herpes infested hope the best insult/pun was, I still remember it pretty vividly.

You’re only saying I have heart and fortitude because I

Proved it earlier this week.
Proved it earlier this week.
Proved it earlier this week.
All Of The Above.

I’m going to go with F.

And F stands for Fuck, Finn…

WHY YOU NO TELL TRUTH EVER, ? WHY YOU LIE TO CADRYN?!

Oh and I don’t even know how to handle stupidity on the such a level as this:

“No I was just showing the fact that you can’t make it in this ring. You have no talent, nothing going for you except for what I just said.”

So I have nothing going for me besides having all the heart and determination and fortitude that one can fuckin’ have?

HELLO, VINNIE?

I CAN’T COME IN TOMORROW, CAUSE FINN GAVE ME DOWNS AND POTENTIALLY A STROKE, AND MAYBE GOUT TOO.

NO VINNIE, I DON’T FUCKING KNOW HOW I GOT GOUT. PROBABLY FROM THE LEFT OVER DROOL IN HIS DROOL CUP…

Man, I gotta wrap this up. My dick so sore from nut busting that it’s actually getting painful to continue to dish you out this verbal nut busting..

Anyways, man.

You just went on about more of the same ignorant faggotry you’ve been known to do.

You’re like the XWF’s version of Red from Shawshank Redemption.

You’ve been known to procure certain items from time to time..

It’s just a shame that you can’t buy a victory or even an ounce of fucking skill..

Just cause I like to keep my flow similar.

In the words of my main man Andy Dufrane

“Bad luck, I guess. It floats around. It's got to land on somebody.”

It’s just a shame that motherfucker gonna hit you right in the goddamn teeth tomorrow night.

As will my dick…

KBAI!

Threaded Mode \| Linear Mode It's the final countdown (To yet another Finn LOSS)
Author	Message