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Cadryn Tiberius · **05-30-2017, 03:29 PM**

Tuesday - May 30th 2017 - 4:05pm - Inner Monologue

”It’s funny. When you spend most of your life in small towns, or in the middle of nowhere you tend to ignore a lot of popular things. I ain’t got a clue what a fidget spinner is, I ain’t never twerked, and I don’t care to pay much attention to what our president is up to. When you choose not to cloud your mind with the unnecessary, it opens up a brand new outlook on life itself. My victory of Thomas Nixon last Saturday was a nice way to start my weekend. Though things didn’t go as expected, I was able to claim the XWF Television Championship, and call it my own. Well, that is, for about 15 seconds. Theo had to come out and do what he saw best for the company, and award the retention and successful defense to Thomas Nixon. I was declared the winner, but I wasn’t able to keep the belt. Things happen, and it’s for the best. Theo is a great guy, and The Kings™ are doing their best to uphold justice throughout the XWF. Everywhere you turn you’ve got Ax3 doing something they shouldn’t. Whether it’s taking over shows, oh by the way, thanks for screwing me out of the title, appreciate that. Or, attacking other members of the roster unprovoked. Furthermore, worse than Ax3, is this little subfaction dickshit that Vinnie Lane and his bunch of has beens has seemingly created. It’s truthfully a shame to know that The Kings™, myself included, and Thomas Nixon are the only truly good guys left. All we try and do is uphold the law to the best of our ability, and everyday a new group rises up to oppose us. But, I guess you’ll have that. Far be it from me to look down on the rest of the roster, but facts are facts. Either way, I have to keep my eye on the prize. Tomorrow, is the fateful Trio’s Championship Match that I’ve yet to comment on. Jack Cain and myself will be doing our best to put an end to the reign of Ax3 as Trios Champions, but without a third partner, it’s going to prove to be difficult. Impossible? Hardly. The current Trio’s Champions are the biggest bunch of cockjockeys the XWF has probably ever seen, and that’s saying a lot. As of right now, you have three men who claim to be on the same page, but spend most of their spare time bickering at one another, trying to figure out who has the biggest dick. It’s ridiculous. You speak towards the value of unity, and you have no clue the definition. First off, you have that little shitweasel Chris Chaos as the self proclaimed leader. That guy couldn’t lead his dick to the pisser, let alone a group of grown men. And then we have Robert Main who has about as much chance of being a true leader as Helen Keller has seeing the writing on the wall. Last but certainly not least, we have Michael Graves. Now, I’ll admit, this man has the talent and the leadership skills to turn this whole situation around. I don’t actually expect him to do it, but the skillset is there. If he wasn’t so busy trying to see up the skirt of every Sesame Street watching child in the northern US, he might be able to rally his troops to victory. There you have it. Three men who share different ideas about the same organization. With that said, I can honestly say I’ve never been so happy to be denied entrance to the cool kids club known as “Ax3”.”

(End Monologue)

It’s a beautiful day in Texas! The sun is shining, the birds are chirping, and the wind is blowing a soft breeze across the back of your neck. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect day. As the scene comes to focus, we find Cadryn and Natalie sitting on the tailgate of his truck, having what looks to be a picnic. A cold beer in Cadryns hand, and a small glass of wine in Natalies, the two lovebirds look genuinely happy. As Cadryn finishes off his first beer and reaches for another one, the two of them begin to converse casually.

”Truth be told, I don’t think this old truck is going to make it another year. I’m fairly certain she’s already running on hopes and dreams. Probably bondo and zip ties as well.”

Natalie playfully smiles at Cadryn before letting out a small laugh.

”Yeah, it’s probably best that we invest in a new truck for you. I know how much you love this truck, but honey, she ain’t gonna make it much longer.”

Cadryn looks at his old, red,1994 Mazda B3000 before patting the tailgate of the truck and smiling.

”This old girl has seen better days, that’s for certain. But I’ll be damned if I give up on her. Her and I have been through some tough times together, and she ain’t never given up on me. We’re gonna rock it till the wheels fall off!”

Natalie rolls her eyes at Cadryn and gives him a playfully angry look.

”Whatever you say, dear. Whatever you say.”

Natalie reaches down and pours herself another glass of wine. The wine glass begins sweating once the cold liquid hits the sun drenched glass.

”So are we going to talk about tomorrow, or are we just going to pretend like it isn’t going to happen?”

Cadryn looks at his wife lovingly, before reaching over to grab her hand. As he grabs her hand he leans in slowly and gives her a very passionate and quite lengthy kiss before relinquishing her hand and going back to his position on the tailgate.

”Ain’t much to talk about, babe. I step into the ring tomorrow with three goons who can’t seem to agree with each other long enough to get anything accomplished. I ain’t worried about it, and you shouldn’t be either.”

”Natalie demeanor changes from happily married, to married and scared.”

”As much as I believe in your abilities, Jack Cain seems like a nutjob. On top of that, you’re stepping into the ring with 3 of the top guys in the entire company. You’ve done well for yourself lately, but I don’t know that this will work out in your, or should I say, “our” favor.”

Cadryn still being his happy go lucky self, continues to sip on his beer and stare off into the wilderness.

”Does putting your body through hell and back ever work out in anyone favor? I’ve done what I can to provide for us, and sometimes things don’t always work out. I’ve done things that most men couldn’t dream of just to keep us afloat, and I will continue to do that until my dieing day. You really want to know how I feel about this situation, I’ll gladly tell you, Natalie.”

Cadryn finishes his beer and hurls the bottle into the woods. The sound of glass shattering echoes throughout as Cadryn quickly hops off his tailgate and to a standing position.

”I think it’s fucking bullshit. Pardon my language, but it’s to the point now that I can no longer bite my tongue. Every time the XWF puts me in some type of match that relies on another person to help me gain any ground, it fails. I’m always left high and dry by whatever partner they deem fit to fuck me. Albeit, Jack Cain, as creepy and off as he is, is doing his best to help, but it’s not enough. Douchebag Mcfucklepuff aka Gabriel Emerick is no where to be found. Probably still trying to remove the tampon that got lodged in that gaping slit he calls a vagina. The shit pisses me off to no avail.”

“Not to mention, all week long I’ve had to sit back and listen to these idiots bad mouth me and my career, because I was already locked into a match with Nixon. I had my focus where it needed to be, but nonetheless it sucks when I have to focus my attention towards one situation while ignoring the other. I don’t typically do this, but let’s go ahead and start recapping all of the bullshit that each of these fuckbags had to say. Afterwards, I’ll go ahead and give my own opinions on their bullshit.”

Natalie begins to look concerned as Cadryn begins pacing back and forth in front of the bed of his truck.

”Honey, it’s ok, we don’t have to do this..”

”OH YES WE DO! IT’S A LITTLE LATE NOW, NATALIE.”

Cadryn pulls out his cell phone and navigates to the XWF website. Once he has found what he is looking for, he slams his phone down on the tailgate and begins pacing once more.

”First off, Graves, the fucking child molester, wants to start off by calling me his favorite punching bag. And then he goes into some bullshit about how does it feel facing him and the rest of the assgrabbing fuckboys. Graves, you mutilated, innocent muffin huffin, cunt, it feels fucking spectacular. I’ve wanted nothing more than to whip your ass up one side of the arena and down the other just for your actions. This isn’t some kind of fucking vendetta, or some type of bad blood. We both know you’re in love with me, hell, all you do is compliment me most of the time. And while I appreciate the nice things you have to say about me, they don’t hold much merit coming from a fucking alleged pedophile. I said alleged because, though I’ve never seen you do what you’ve discussed, hearing about it is enough for me to believe it, knowing how crazy your old ass is. Then, you wanna go on talking about how I brag about almost winning matches and all that stupid shit. Of course I brag about it, you idiot. It’s something to be proud of, it’s a reason to hold my head high.”

“ You’re so goddamn busy being down on everybody else, I wouldn’t expect you to understand what it’s like to feel proud of certain moments in your life. As for my wife fighting my battles for me, or me hiding under her skirt, that’s blatant bullshit. To respect a woman, to keep your tone of voice civil and to rarely raise your voice is fucking gentlemanly. Maybe if you were even half the man I was, your wife wouldn’t have spent most of her time calling me and crying before inevitably leaving your worthless ass. Oh, and good job on not even originally knowing who your opponents were. You’re so fucked in the head that you don’t even know who you’re facing apparently. That’s pretty fucking impressive, to be that goddamn stupid. It takes a lot of extra work, I would imagine. Uncharacteristically quiet? Are you kidding me? I’ve done nothing but shake the foundation of the XWF this week. I wasn’t worried about your stupid ass. I was worried about winning the TV Title and I did just that. Again, I did what I set my sights on doing, and I accomplished my goals. Just like I said I would. Just because I didn’t feel the need to make mention of your dumbass doesn’t mean I wasn’t still being the Essence Of Excellence as I always am.”

“Ain’t no white horse here, pal. As for my talk about being the Epitome Of Manliness, that shit is as legit as your need for underaged snatch. I am, now and forever, the Epitome Of Manliness, something you wouldn’t even know anything about. Oh hey, look, more “your wife fights your battles for you” bullshit. Are you out of lines, or did it actually seem like a good idea to repeat yourself? Regardless, the fact remains, my wife does what is necessary to help me succeed. She doesn’t fight my battles for me, she does nothing but love me unconditionally, and that’s another thing you’ll never know anything about. Hiding behind Theo in his mansion, eh? Well, you’re wrong again. While you were running your cockholster and playing barbie with Main, I was out winning the TV Title. When is the last time you weren’t just handed a title and actually won one?”

“Oh, that’s right.”

“You haven’t since your return to the XWF. I mean, you did win the Heavy Metalweight Title, but I don’t exactly call that challenging, seeing as I’ve done it 5 times already. Stroking Doc’s cock, eh? Well, since that’s apparently what I’m doing, let me ask you this. Did it qualify as stroking his cock when he personal invited me to hang out with him? Or when he personally wanted my friendship? I’ll tell you the same thing I told Nixon. Doc doesn’t pal around with scrubs. Also, prior to Ax3, when is the last time you spoke to anyone the caliber of Doc that you weren’t in a match with? Lethal Lottery when he was forced to be your partner? FORCED, Graves. He isn’t forced to be my friend, yet he chooses to. Remember that.”

“I can forget about all that, though. I don’t really give two shits what you think about me. But then you did something even I thought you were above doing. You broke into my home, and you cut a fucking promo in my mirror. My wife was in tears she was so scared, you piece of wrinkly dick skin. How dare you come into another man's house unannounced when he isn’t home, that's the lowest of the low. And for that, Graves, I’m going to have to teach you a lesson in humility. I’m going to have to teach you that not all hero’s wear capes. I’m going to crush your fucking soul under my boot for what you’ve done. Nobody upsets my wife, that is unforgivable. In closing, I’d just like to say a big ol’ fuck you, to Michael Graves, because The Essence Of Excellence is going to put an end to his bullshit once and for all.”

Natalie has a look of shock on her face. It isn’t typical of Cadryn to run off at the mouth like that, especially in the presence of his princess. As she lifts herself off of the tailgate and onto the ground, Cadryn continues on.

”Next we have Chris Chaos. What a little bitch that dude is. It’s actually offensive to me how pussified he is, and he’s not even in my circle! First of all he goes on this speel about how I found out first hand what happens to men who talk shit and hit people with cheap shots, yada yada.”

“Jesus Christ, you’re so goddamn

it hurts.”

“Instead of you telling everyone a bunch of lies, why don’t you tell the truth for once you compulsive lying fuck! I had your ass beat, you know it, I know it, the world knows it. That entire match I did nothing but the respect into you that you failed to have for me. Second after second, minute after fucking minute, I beat your ass over and over again. And at the end, it was over. I had the match won, while you laid broken, bruised, and bloodied on the fucking mat. Oh, but guess what? Somehow “Slick Dick” Graves managed to find his way into the arena and cost me the fucking match like always. So before you go running your cocksucker about how you kicked my ass, maybe you should get your facts straight. And if there’s really any reason to doubt me, the match is one tape, we can check it out if you’d like, Chris. I’ll give you credit for one thing though, referring to me as a rash is pretty fuckin’ accurate. Quit isn’t a word in my vocabulary, so standing up for what’s right and always coming back for more is my goddamn M.O.”

“Everything I do, it exudes fucking awesome. It exudes excellence, and it exudes manliness. All of which you know dickshit about. Of course I’m going to keep coming back you dickless twat, why wouldn’t I? Why would I not keep trying to get the win? Pussy’s like you are what make this business intolerable. As for you permanently getting rid of me? That’s not gonna happen, pal. I’ll always get back up, I’ll always dust myself off, and I’ll always be there to bust your fuckin’ ass when it needs busting. Oh and you talk about me being the guy to cheap shot, and talk shit? Dude, you fucking attacked me first all those months ago! Had you not done that, I wouldn’t have a goddamn problem with you. But instead, you hid behind Kato until his

ass got fired, and then I ran through that ass like it’s never been run through before. Well, that is, until Doc ran through it a few weeks ago.”

“You’re the whole fuckin’ reason Ax3 is in the shit shape that it’s in. Your piss poor leadership, holier than thou attitude, and overbearing self obsession is what put Ax3 in the shitter! I’ll be the first to admit that when Graves first gathered ya’ll, it was an intimidating group. But the more I watched, nay, the world watched, the more Ax3 began to unravel at the seams. And it’s all because they picked a little asshole like you to put at the helm. Like I said, you couldn’t lead your dick to the pisser, let alone an entire group of superstars. In all honesty, I’d suggest you sit this one out, Chris. I’d hate to have to put an end to your career and force you to disappoint Jenny more than when you whip out that lap pinky and irritate the inside of her thigh.”

Cadryn stops in his tracks and looks Natalie dead in the eye.

”Robert Main..”

”Honey, please stop, you’re scaring me. I’ve not seen you this fired up in a long time, and I’m honestly afraid of what you’re going to do to these men.”

”OH, NOW YOU’RE CONCERNED? IT WASN’T BUT AN HOUR AGO YOU WERE ALREADY WRITING ME OFF, BUT NOW YOU’VE CHANGED YOUR MIND?!”

Natalie puts her head in her hands, and begins to quietly sob.

”Do you fucks see what you’ve made me do?! You’ve forced me to upset my wife, and I FUCKING HATE THAT!”

Cadryn slams his tailgate shut and out of nowhere begins landing punch after punch to the old tailgate. Dent after dent begins to form as Cadryn unleashes an onslaught of anger and aggression on his faithful truck.

”Do you see what happens, Robert?! Do you see what happens to men who force my hand?! You should have just kept that dick runway of a mouth closed. But no, instead, you decided to join the fun, and for that, I assure you, you will suffer. I’m not even going to harp on what I’m going to do to you at High Stakes.”

“No.”

“Instead, I’m going to talk about what is going to happen tomorrow. You want to talk about being a double champion? Well you’d better fuckin’ enjoy it, dude. That shit ends on Warfare. I’m done playing nice, and I’m done trying to be the bigger man. It’s over for you, Main. Your reign of boringly inaccurate promos is going to come to an end, an end that culminates in my victory over Ax3.”

“My losing ways could rub off on Jack, you say? By losing you must mean winning, because that’s all I’ve been doing lately, slapcock. The past 3 matches have been victories, in case you weren’t keeping track. As for being a Kings junkie, I don’t even know what that is supposed to mean? Do you actually think about this shit before you say it, or do you flip a coin, hit the power button on your rabbit vibrator, and just fuck the failure into your promos? Does it happen at the same time that you hit the right spot in that mangled pussy of yours, Roberta? You’re right about one thing, dude, I’m definitely not on your level. I’m so far above the plateaued level you’re on it’s astonishing. As for not deserving a title shot? Do you not remember that time where I called out the roster and you offered up your title to me on a silver platter? Tell me more about how backpedaling is going to get you ahead in life. I’ve worked my way up the ladder. Incase you’re wondering it went: Heavymetal Weight, Federweight, and Television. Those are the title I’ve won, in the order I’ve won them. As far as I’m concerned, the next rung of the ladder is the Hart Title. So, as it stands, I am next in line for that belt, bud. There you go talking about beating me in the tag team matches again. Once again, going against your own words earlier. Does it actually make your pussy wet to stumble across your own words and inevitably get verbally fucked by a guy you don’t consider competition?”

“I bet it stings.”

“As for being flavor of the month, bitch, I’m flavor of the century. There isn’t a soul in the world who doesn’t find me entertaining, electrifying, and all those other descriptive words that describe me as an athlete. Hell, half the time I don’t even have matches, and I’m still the most popular guy on any given show. Blame it on The Kings™ or whatever you feel compelled to blame it on, but it doesn’t change the fact that I am the shit, son. I am a funny, sexy, adonis blood havin son of a bitch that could run circles around you and the pussy parade you call Ax3 any day of the week, and twice on Sunday. The only thing you’re going to embarrass on Warfare, at High Stakes, or anytime you step into the ring with me is yourself, Robert.”

“Now, I’m gonna go console my wife, and do my job as a husband and as a man. I’ll see you dickbiscuits tomorrow.”

As the scene fades out, we see Cadryn clutching his wife tightly against his chest, because as you know, everything's gonna be alright..

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