-After being arrested Hunter Payne didn't post bail for four reasons-

1. It honestly wouldn't be that long before he saw a judge anyway.

2. It was a nice break away from the drama that Joy causes him. That's right, Hunter Payne would rather be locked in a jail cell than deal with Joy at this point.

3. He knows if he saw the final damage that Joy caused to his Loft, he'd probably kill her and end up in an even worse situation.

4. This ain't shit! Hunter Payne is so hard (not hard, but hawrd! You gotta stress the w that isn't even in there. Like a gangsta, hawrd son!), He's hard but yet such a people's person, if he stays here long enough he'll be running the place.

-Right now we catch him in a conversation with his new friend T-Dog, a big black guy (looks very similar to Michael Clarke Duncan from Green Mile) who is in here for the same reason, being wrongfully accused of beating his bitch. They are actually having a conversation about that right now-




T-Dog: And I hate it man, when they trick you, into staying into a relationship.


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: And I'm just like "Bitch, ain't nobody want you! Be gone!"


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: Then she gets jealous when other bitches be hitting you up!


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: And she always plays the victim!


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: Then she destroys your crib!


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: Then she suckers you into fucking her!


Payne: Yeah!


T-Dog: Then she ends up pregnant...


Payne: Yea... WAIT WHAT?!!


T-Dog: She hasn't done that to you yet? She will.


Payne: FUCK THAT!


T-Dog: Gotta keep your shit wrapped then cuhh!


Payne: Thanks T-Dog your very insightful.


-The Guard opens the cell-


Guard: Payne... Hunter... Let's go!


Payne: Alright my man I'm out this motherfucker.


-Hunter Payne and T-Dog do the homie hug, and Hunter walks out-


Payne: Hey yo, take care of yourself!


T-Dog: Peace.

---

-Hunter Payne has just entered court to receive his sentencing, Joy is not present. So that is always a great sign. It's just like a courtroom you would see in all those movies and TV shows. Not to mention those daytime court shows, that only stay at home moms watch. You know, when they aren't busy watching Jerry Springer-


Guard: All rise! -everybody rises- The honorable Judge Banks now presiding.


-Judge Banks (looks like James Avery from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air) makes his way to his elevated stand, then gets Hunter Payne's file-



Judge: -bangs gavel- You may be seated.


-Everybody sits obviously-


Judge: Mr. Payne, Good morning.


Payne: Good morning your honor.


Judge: Let's see domestic violence. Weird, you don't look like the domestic violence type.


Payne: I'm not your honor. I've been wrongly accused by these racist officers that are present today.


Judge: Alright, it's too damn early for this. Why don't I do this. You drop the whole 'wrongly accused by racist' accusations and I will reduce your sentence. Is that good?


Payne: Yes sir.


Judge: And since this is your first offense, I'll even take off the community service. How does that sound?


Payne: Sounds good your honor.


Judge: Alright. $1000 fine and I am ordering you and the woman in question to complete a couples counseling course.


Payne: Ok


Judge: Case dismissed. -bangs gavel-


Payne: Thank you your honor.

---

-Hunter then walks out of the court a free man. Now he must wait to retrieve his personal belongings that was on his persons when arrested. So now he waits in the police station-


Officer: Mr. Payne, we need you to sign this. Stating we gave you back your belongings. Let's see, Wallet with Identification... 3 pictures... and 97 dollars... and debit card... 2 unused condoms?


Payne: Shit I'm running low.


Officer: What else? Your cell phone.... pack of gum...


Payne: Hey how many strips are in there?


Officer: 6.


Payne: Alright just checking....


Officer: Car keys.... 12 unscratched lottery tickets!


Payne: Sweet, something to look forward to...


Officer: And.. a post it note.. that says "Note to self: It is still illegal to kill stupid people!"


Payne: Well that's a good thing for my next opponent Tron Turner, and my girlfriend haha am I right?? No? Alright, calm down it was a joke.


Officer: Yeah whatever... just sign here.


-Payne signs the documents and gets his belongings back-


Payne: You have a nice day.


-As Hunter Payne walks out he realizes it's now time for the real punishment! Couples counseling with Joy-

---